Love Survives (35 page)

When I couldn’t take it anymore I pulled the vehicle over and placed it in park. “Look at me.”

“No!” She stared out at an open field.

I ran my hand back up her thigh, taunting her. “Kat, look at me.”

The pissed look on her face was priceless. I wished I had my phone out to take a picture to make fun of it later. “What?”

“They miss you. Hell, they miss us. I left too, you know? This isn’t easy for me, but they deserve to know that little girl in the backseat. They weren’t in the dark about my feelings, Kat. They knew how I felt and they probably knew how you felt. We were kids, who wore our feelings on our sleeves. I’m betting they weren’t as surprised as you think that we ended up in bed, several times. After all, it is where you belonged anyway.”

She huffed and puffed, but finally gave in. “I’m still mad.”

I tapped her little nose. “No you’re not. You’re scared, but you’re not mad.”

“I don’t think I like that you know what I’m thinking. A girl’s got a right to some private thoughts.”

“Get used to it. It’s never going to change.”

Kat sighed, but finally seemed to calm down. A few minutes later she made a good suggestion. “I think we should stop for the night and drive the rest of the way in the morning. We didn’t sleep good last night, and could both use the rest before we see your parents.”

“I don’t know if that’s a good idea. I mean, when we go to hotels, you get pregnant. It’s scary.” I laughed at my own convoluted joke.

She smacked me hard on the leg. “I should have never said anything to you.”

“You know it’s funny.”

“What’s going to be funny is when I don’t get my period in two weeks. Then I’m going to watch you cry.”

I looked right at her, making sure she was paying close attention. “I won’t be crying out of fear, beautiful. They’ll be tears of joy for me. So, are we stopping at a hotel, or are you scared?”

She covered her face. I recognized that I was getting on her nerves. For one reason or another I found comfort in us being this way. It was the reason I fell in love with her so long ago.

“I’m not scared of you!”

“You should be. I’ll steal your heart and you’ll never get it back,” I promised.

“I gave it to you years ago, and I don’t want it back,” she replied.

I took her hand and held it against my lips. She couldn’t know how amazing this was for me. “No matter what happens when we get there tomorrow, we’re a team. If something bad is said, which I don’t see happening, we’ll leave together, as a family. I promise.”

“I just don’t want to see the look of disappointment on their faces. I’m already feeling that about myself. Being reminded of it only makes things worse.”

“I guarantee that when we walk in there, and they take a look at that princess in the back seat, everything will change. Look at how she’s affected me.”

In a few short days, I felt like everything in my life had changed. Kat couldn’t argue with the truth. She knew as well as I did that they were crazy if they didn’t love our daughter. “I hope you’re right.”

I walked across the lot to reserve a room for us while Kat went into the restaurant to change B. She said she was too soaked to wait. When we met again I had the key in my hand. “I got us a room. Since you’re scared of getting knocked up, I took a room with one twin bed. We can all share, right?”

She raised her brow, shaking her head the whole time. “You can sleep on the floor, I suppose.”

“I’m just playing. I got a honeymoon suite with a vibrating bed. Bug’s going to love it.”

She shook her head and kept looking at the menu while I played peek-a-boo with B.

After we grabbed a bite to eat, we headed over to the hotel. The first thing we did was got B situated with some of her toys. Her schedule was all messed up and Kat was freaking out over it. The more comfortable the child was the better she would sleep.

I took it upon myself to get a hot shower. It had been a long day, and I needed to wash as much if it away as I could. I didn’t see a problem with coming out of the bathroom in only a towel, but the look on Kat’s face made me rethink that decision. She may as well have been drooling. I watched her taking me in while smiling cheek to cheek. I knew what was on her mind, and it didn’t involve clothing.

I started to look for my boxers in my bag when my daughter walked over and looked at me curiously. I still had a towel on, but I could tell she was intrigued. “Hey, bug. What are you doing over here?”

“Pincess.” She handed me a little princess doll.

“Where’s her prince?”

She located the male prince and made them kiss. We all began to laugh at how she understood that gesture. “You may look like Daddy, but you act like Mama,” I said as I kissed her nose.

B jumped into my lap and touched my nose. “Nose.”

I touched her nose back. “B.”

When she went to do it again, she paused. Kat climbed up behind her and whispered, “Who is that?”

B smiled. “Daddy.”

It was another pivotal moment for me. She was mine in every way, and she even knew it. My whole life flashed before my eyes, only to bring me back to this monumental event. All  the pain was worth it to have her in my life. Words couldn’t begin to describe the happiness this child brought me. I was in awe of her.

“Say it again, B. Who am I?”

She giggled. “Daddy.”

I kept asking her, hoping she’d never change her mind. After a while I could tell Kat was ready to put ear plugs in. I was getting a little annoying, probably purposely pushing her buttons.

B didn’t fall asleep right away. It could have been the chocolate I fed her while her mother wasn’t looking. We talked until her little eyes got heavy. Once I knew she was comfortable I made my way over to the other bed. I wrapped my arms around Kat’s small body. “Are you excited about tomorrow?”

She turned to face me. “Seriously? My stomach is all knotted up.”

I knew I had to leave it alone. I couldn’t risk her freaking out anymore about it. She had enough on her plate with her psycho husband. Since it was important that every aspect of her life was taken care of I decided to ask about her personal property. “Do you have anyone that can run by and check on things at your house?”

“Yeah. I can call my old boss at the diner I waitressed at. She never really liked Bobby much, so he won’t be able to influence her into thinking I’m a piece of shit.”

“A waitress sounds like a hot job for you. Woman, what else are you hiding from me?”

Kat giggled. “I wasn’t an exotic dancer if that’s what you’re thinking. There’s no way dirty men are going to see me naked.”

“I’d pay an arm and a leg to see you dance naked.” I teased her with my eyebrows, moving them up and down with excitement.

She gave me a sarcastic look. “If I could dance, I’d do it for free, but we both know I have two left feet.”

“Well, we’re in luck, because I have two right feet.”

She attempted to push me away, but failed horribly. “How about we get some rest?”

“How about you take off that Army shirt and we have a repeat of last night first?”

I was surprised when she didn’t argue about it. Kat sat up and lifted the shirt over her head. Then she wriggled out of her panties. Completely naked in front of me, I prepared to devour her.

“This is never going to get old.”

She climbed on my lap, pulling me forward by my dog tags until our lips were touching. “Tell me you love me and I’ll give you that dance.”

“I love you, beautiful. Now, stand up and show me what you’ve got.”

I threw my arms behind my head and waited for my show to begin, all the while knowing she really couldn’t dance a lick. It was going to be the sexiest catastrophe known to man, and I was going to love every single minute of it.

Chapter 41

I’d been lying
in bed with her for about twenty minutes before I decided I wasn’t going to be able to sleep unless I took care of a certain problem. While she seemed to be sleeping, I slid down under the covers, kissing her skin at the base of her pussy. Her body reacted, and I knew she was fully aware of what was about to happen. My thumb traced her little bud, bringing her to life. I listen to a soft moan escaping her lips while my tongue flicked her clit. Even though it was hot under the covers, I wasn’t about to let my daughter catch me doing this. I’d never forgive myself. I kept going, sucking and lapping her up, until her knees came up around me. She dug her hands into my hair, keeping my mouth close to the task. The taste of her, the favor of her essence made me crazy. I wanted to bring her to new heights, repeatedly. One finger slid inside of her channel, immediately becoming saturated with her sultry musk. I couldn’t stop. I had to continue until I felt her losing control, and in that moment I’d know without a doubt that I was the best she’d ever had. I wanted to be the only person in Kat’s life to make her cum this way.

I sucked her clit in hard, holding it between my teeth while pulling back. I moved my head, rubbing my chin over her pussy, while I still thrust my finger in and out of her. Her walls began to close, sending my finger out again. I drove it back in, pulling my face away only to lick over it some more. Then I felt her, shaking, no seizing beneath me. I made my way up to her mouth, savoring the way she accepted my kisses.

“I’m never washing my face again,” I teased.

“You’re so sick.”

“Love sick. That’s what I am.”

“Just go to sleep, Brooks. We have a long way to drive in the morning.”

“Fine. I love you long time. Just remember that while you’re getting your rest. I’ll be right here when you wake up.”

Later, after Kat fell asleep in my arms, I remained awake. I’d been up thinking for hours, trying to find a solution to her worries. She was so concerned about my parents and Brooklyn. I knew there had to be some way to make the transition easier for everyone involved. That’s when it hit me. I knew what to say, all I had to do was run it by her first. “Kat, wake up.”

She squinted when she opened her eyes. After checking the clock she seemed pretty annoyed. “Go away. I’m sleeping. It’s not even morning,” she whispered.

“I have an idea that might make you feel better. Come on, wake up. The sun will be up soon. Don’t you want to know what it is?”

She leaned her head on her hand, like it was the only thing keeping it upward. “Fine, talk.”

I could see that she was falling back asleep, but didn’t care.

“You’re all upset over me not knowing about Brooklyn. You think that they’re going to flip out on you or something. I think I have a solution. What if we told them that I knew the whole time? I haven’t been home and they suspect there is a lot of reasons why I’m remaining at a distance. It would only make sense that part of it was because of the baby. If we told them that you didn’t want Branch to know, they’ll believe us.”

She yawned, but looked right at me anyway. “Brooks, the only problem with your story is the part where I run off and get married to a stranger. How are we going to even begin to explain that?”

“We won’t tell them that either. They don’t need to know. Look, we all make mistakes. Last week I felt like my whole life was worthless. I thought you’d moved on and started a family with someone else. I wanted to bury myself ten feet in the ground and never look back. I don’t care about the details of when or who. All I care about is us. Wouldn’t it be nice to have a family to visit on the holidays? It’s better for them to know her when she’s small. That way she’ll never remember a time when they weren’t a part of her life.”

She shrugged. “Of course, it would be wonderful, but I think you’re assuming that they’ll forgive me. I hurt them, Brooks. Just because you’ve forgiven me doesn’t mean they will.”

“Kat, I love you and I love B. I don’t care if it’s been four days or four years. Nothing is going to change for me. Don’t you get it? You’ve given me everything and you still think that you’re this horrible person. You’ve always been a part of my family and you know it. Family forgives.”

“I
am
a horrible person.” She just kept blaming herself as if I hadn’t been a part of the reason she left her life behind. “Brooks, I ran away from everything, had a child that you never knew about, and let another man, who beat me on occasion, raise her. What part of that is forgivable?”

I pressed my hand over her mouth, so she couldn’t say anymore. “All of it. It’s true, but you also assumed that we were through. Then you thought I died. If something ever did happen to me, I’d want you to find happiness. Besides, after seeing you for five minutes, I knew you were still in love with me. After that, I didn’t care so much. Granted, I was pretty pissed that first night.”

It was rough knowing that Kat assumed I was dead. I don’t know how long she would have gone on living like that, perhaps the rest of her life. That made me so sad because I knew we’d all be missing out on little Brooklyn.

“I could spend the rest of my life apologizing to you and it will never be enough. What if we don’t work out? What then?” Was that a real question? Was she serious?