Throwaway (5 page)

Jessie sincerely hoped she didn’t look as
nervous as she felt. Harmony chatted with her easily about not much
in particular and she took that as a good sign.

“Be really careful you don’t pick up a cop,
baby girl,” Jessie warned.

“Is that a joke?” Harmony nodded in the
direction of an old white Plymouth that pulled up at the corner of
First and Lucas just as they walked up.

“Don’t accidentally pick up any cops,” Jessie
amended before waving and darting across the street to hop in the
car.

“Hey there,” his eyes seemed to lap her
up.

“Hey,” she flushed under his gaze. “Where’d
you get the car?”

“I bought it a few years ago. I keep meaning
to fix it up and never get around to it. It’s not pretty, but it
runs great.”

“No, it’s cool. I like it. What year is
it?”

“Sixty-three.”

“Good year for cars,” she nodded
knowingly.

“You think so?”

“I have no idea,” she admitted. “It just
seemed like the right thing to say.”

Once they were on the highway, she maneuvered
in her seat to pull her skirt down to a respectable length before
sliding the button-up shirt on over the layered tank tops she’d
worn out.

Gabe burst out laughing, an incredulous look
on his face.

“What?”

“Usually it’s the other way around… the girl
sneaks out with more clothes on…”

“Ah, I see what you mean,” Jessie grinned at
the absurdity of it. “I never have been normal.”

“Normal is overrated,” he assured her. “Have
you decided what we’re going to see?”

“Haven’t got a clue.”

“What’s your curfew?”

“I think I brought enough to buy me until 1
a.m.,” she double checked her wallet to be sure.

“To buy you? Are you paying him for a night
off?”

“I’m paying him to think I worked,” she
corrected.

“I’m not okay with that,” he frowned.

“Then pretend you didn’t hear it.”

“I can’t pretend I didn’t hear it.”

“Then get over it. I don’t want you ruining a
perfectly good date—you don’t want to waste my money, do you?”

“I don’t feel right making you pay to spend
time with me.”

“You aren’t the one making me. It’s kind of
funny, really.”

“Funny?”

“Sure… usually people pay to spend time with
me.”

“You’re just full of paradoxes, aren’t
you?”

“Yep. Look at it this way. People spend money
on all sorts of things. Drugs. Alcohol. Some people collect things
or overeat. Lots of people spend money on big houses or fancy cars.
I don’t spend money on any of that stuff. For fourteen years, I’ve
been sticking money under a mattress because I didn’t have anything
better to do with it and nowhere to go.”

“Fourteen years?”

“Now I have somewhere to go.”

“How much do you have?”

“A lot. Probably. I don’t exactly flip my
mattress over to count it.”

“And still you don’t leave.”

“I told you, that’s not an option. You’re not
going to ruin our date by bringing that up again, are you?” she
repositioned herself in the seat so she could face him more
fully.

“What the hell happened to your face?” he
shouted, causing her to regret repositioning herself. A vein was
pulsating in his temple. She took that as a sign he was really
angry.

“That’s not a very nice thing to say,” she
admonished. She didn’t want to be that woman—the one who lied and
said she tripped. But she also didn’t feel like discussing the
truth with him, either. “You’re supposed to tell me I look
ravishing tonight.”

“You do—but I’m going to kill him for
touching you.”

“I know you’re the expert on this kind of
thing, but I’m pretty sure the law would frown on that.”

“You’re not that funny.”

“But I’m cute. Come on, admit it. You think
I’m cute.”

“Yeah, I do think you’re cute,” that dimple
of his flashed again as he grudgingly gave in. “I just don’t like
seeing you hurt.”

He reached out to stroke her cheek with his
thumb. She couldn’t help leaning into his touch. It felt so warm,
so sure.

They wound up watching a romantic comedy.
Well, sitting in a theater that was showing a romantic comedy.
Mostly they watched each other.

After the movie, they went back to the little
diner. Jessie knew she couldn’t eat like this too many nights in a
row or she’d gain a million pounds. At that thought, she paused to
toy with the idea of gaining so much weight Spence wouldn’t want
her. She quickly tossed it aside as too simple a solution. He’d
probably put her on a bread and water diet the minute he suspected
what she was up to.

They were careful to leave the diner in
plenty of time to get her home before curfew. She’d even grown
accustomed to him opening doors for her and paused at her door
while he unlocked the car. Only instead of opening the door, he
took her face in his hands and lowered his lips to hers.

The kiss was gentle, reverent almost. It made
her want to weep. It made her want to sing for joy. It was over as
quickly as it began, although she could still feel it the entire
ride home.

The next night he took her to see the Cards.
She’d never been to a ballgame before. He brought her an Albert
Pujols shirt and a red baseball cap with a cardinal on it. They
drank ridiculously expensive beer and ate nachos with the works.
They sang and clapped and shouted and cheered.

As much as Jessie loved watching the game, as
dearly as she enjoyed his company, what she couldn’t get over was
the feeling that she belonged to this enormous group of bustling,
happy people. She wasn’t on the outside looking in; she was right
in the thick of the moment. And she couldn’t stop smiling.

“You look amazing tonight,” he told her quite
solemnly after they finished jumping and screaming over a Pujols
homerun.

“I feel amazing,” she laughed as she stood on
tiptoe to kiss him. “Thank you.”

“I like seeing you smile,” he kissed her
bruised cheek and she sobered briefly. He’d gotten a few dirty
looks from people who assumed he’d done that to her. She wanted to
crawl in a hole whenever it happened—the last thing she wanted was
for him to experience one moment of discomfort because of her.

Seventh inning stretch shifted her attention
back to the moment and she sang “Take me out to the Ballgame” with
the rest of the stadium, then made a beeline to the bathroom with
the rest of the women in the stadium.

As she neared the line, a familiar face
caught her attention. It was another of Spence’s girls, hanging off
the arm of an older man. Something in her eyes said she knew
Jessie’s face but couldn’t place from where.

Jessie ducked behind a large man and walked
beside him a bit before veering off to weave her way back to Gabe.
Her heart pounded a thousand miles an hour in her chest, but she
tried to appear calm as she slid into the seat beside him.

“Are you okay?” Concern etched his face the
moment he saw her.

“Absolutely.”

“You’re a lousy liar. What’s wrong?”

“Nothing. The line was really long, so I
didn’t wait.”

“So the pained look is because you have to
pee?”

“Don’t be crass.”

“What? Something’s wrong. If you won’t tell
me then I have to guess.”

“I really do hate you sometimes.”

“I think that’s Jessie-code for ‘I’m really
crazy about you because you’re so handsome’,” he informed her.

“You think so, huh?” she grinned, happy he’d
been distracted from his concern.

“Absolutely,” he mimicked her.

“Grrr.”

“Did you just growl at me?” he cocked his
head as if deciding whether he’d heard correctly.

“I don’t know… maybe.”

“So, are you going to tell me what upset you
earlier?”

“You’re like a freaking bulldog, you know
that?”

“I prefer to think Rottweiler. German
Shepherd, maybe. Something manly.”

“It’s not like I called you a
Yorkie-poo.”

“Yes, it could always be worse… so… what was
wrong with you?”

“You know, if you’re going to spend the next
two innings driving me crazy, we can leave now and beat the
traffic.”

“Not a bad idea… come on. Let’s blow this
popsicle stand.”

“Really? You’re having fun. We don’t have to
go.”

“You’re not having fun?” he looked
wounded.

“I am. I had a wonderful time,” she assured
him, before relenting. “I just ran into someone who might have
recognized me. I’m starting to worry it’ll get back to Spence.”

“I can take care of that for you,” he did
growl, and it wasn’t the playful sound Jessie had made, either.

“No. I’m not going to tell you again—stop
trying to kill people.”

“Why are you protecting him?”

“Who says I’m protecting him?”

“I don’t need protecting.”

“Ha!” she practically snorted. “You
definitely need to be protected from yourself.”

“Hey Pot, my name’s Kettle.”

“I hate you. Have I mentioned that?”

“I love it when you talk dirty to me,” he
tapped her nose playfully.

“It’s a good thing you’re cute,” she made a
face at him.

“Are you going to sit there and yak at me or
are we getting out of here?”

“You really don’t mind?”

“Nah. I was hoping we’d have time to make out
in the car before curfew anyway.”

Suddenly, Jessie didn’t mind leaving early.
In fact, it seemed like a grand idea to her. They walked hand in
hand back to the car, stopping for Jessie to run to the restroom
while Gabe stood lookout and again to give a five to the saxophone
player outside the stadium.

Jessie frowned when she realized they were
nearing her neighborhood. He must have been teasing about the
making out thing.

“At least you’ll be able to get some real
work done tomorrow. I won’t be able to get away,” she didn’t like
the idea of not seeing him.

“Do you have to work?” he tried to sound
calm, but Jessie could tell he wasn’t happy.

“No, actually, it’s my nights off when I have
trouble getting away. I have two nights on and one night off. The
on nights Spence doesn’t keep track of me—so long as he gets his
share the next morning. The off nights, I’m on a pretty short
leash.”

The cloud that fell over Gabe’s eyes spoke
louder than any words could. Jessie shrank back in her seat with
the distinct feeling she was somehow tainted in his eyes now. She
mentally cursed herself for reminding him who she really was.

“So,” he began after a long pause. “What are
we doing the next night?”

“I don’t know. What do you want to do?” Hope
fluttered inside her.

“I know a great little corner bar over near
Dogtown. Want to grab a bite there?”

“Yeah, sure. Sounds great,” Jessie nodded,
relief washing over her.

He might have been teasing about making out
in the car, but the goodnight kiss he gave sent flames shooting
through her. It was fascinating to be so completely and totally
overtaken by the need to be touched by another human being—by this
human being.

She expected the next day to crawl by. She
now firmly held the belief that nothing of interest could happen in
between date nights. She was wrong.

The morning passed pretty much the same as
any other. After their morning workout, she and Harmony went
clothes shopping at Retro 101. She found a cute mini dress and some
cowboy boots to wear on her next date with Gabe. It was garish
enough for Spence to not think twice about it, stylish enough she
wouldn’t feel the need to take extra clothes with her. She found a
few other treasures before calling it a day. On her way home, she
stopped in at the Cherokee Market for a soda.

“Hello sunshine,” her favorite Irishman
greeted her, kindness and laughter dancing in his warm blue
eyes.

“Hey Danny,” she smiled and hugged him.
“How’s the wife and kids?”

“Beautiful as always. You coming to see me
tonight?”

“It’s Wednesday, isn’t it?”

“I didn’t know—I heard Spence was fit to be
tied today.”

“I haven’t seen him,” Jessie frowned in
confusion. “What’s up?”

“Word is he is sporting a fresh bruise on his
cheek… a lot like yours, actually. Some guy just walked up to him,
clocked him, and walked off.”

“Really?” Jessie’s breath caught in her
throat.

“Scared the life outta him, from what I
hear,” a smile seemed to be tugging the corner of his mouth.

“Well, unless I’m in trouble and don’t know
it, I’ll be there tonight. Tell your family I said hey,” she kissed
him on the cheek and wandered back to her flat.

Despite living on the same street for
fourteen years, she never got tired of soaking up all of its
character. How could you not love a place with murals on the sides
of buildings and mosaic tile trash cans?

But today, she walked home without seeing her
surroundings. What had possessed Gabe to do something so stupid? If
Dan had noticed that Spence’s bruise matched her own, wouldn’t
everyone else—Spence included?

Fear that he had made things worse for her
mingled with a small amount of satisfaction.

“Spence is looking for you,” a Hispanic woman
with riotous curls called from the other side of the street as she
passed by. It didn’t matter how long she knew Marie, every time
Jessie saw her, the thought flitted through her mind that the girl
had obviously watched Pretty Woman once too often as a child.

“Thanks,” Jessie waved and smiled, pretending
her stomach wasn’t in knots. If Marie sensed fear on Jessie’s part,
the story would be all over the neighborhood by the end of the day.
The more she could convince people this had absolutely nothing to
do with her, the better.

To that end, she plastered a benign look on
her face and strolled into her apartment as if she hadn’t a care in
the world.