The Face In The Mirror (28 page)

I pulled a piece of paper from my bag and started to read. “Tender braised
beef tips, fresh green, red and yellow peppers, and red onion, in a heavenly
sauce of burgundy wine, fresh thyme and garlic, served over a combination of
red, black and wild rice.” At least that’s what Cassie’s description says,” I
laughed.

When we arrived home, we shared a shower and decided to have our
‘dessert’ before dinner. I don’t recall us sharing such intimate showers when we
were married before, but I confess that I sure enjoy a good shower when we
get home each evening…

We filled our plates, and Mitchell loved the dish, but more importantly,
Cassie’s description was dead on – it was heavenly! We quickly cleaned up the
kitchen and curled up on the sofa to read.

He really was a handsome man. He was kind and understanding, and he
had thoughts running through my head that had no business being there. We
had three more days and I couldn’t wait for each one of them.

Thursday morning there was a knock at our stateroom door and I went to
answer it. A young man greeted me. “Ms. Ridgeway?” he asked and I nodded.
“The Captain requests your company, along with Ms. Turner, at his table for
breakfast at 9:30.”

“Thank you,” I told him. I closed the door and plopped on Midgey’s bed.

She curled down in the bed, pulling the pillow over her head.
“Go,” she said. “It would take me an hour and a half to look half as good
as you look right now. Go!”
“I want to, but I shouldn’t.”
“Yes, you should – go! You know your personal limits.”
“I do, but I feel weak and silly, like a young girl. He excites me! He makes
me feel special and wanted.”
“Go my special little butterfly – go, spread your…”
“Midgey!” I shrieked.
“Wings, Mona! Spread your wings!” and we both roared with laughter.

Breakfast with the Captain was wonderful - the company and the meal.
There were two other couples at the table and the captain was pleasant and
engaging… and charming. After the meal the others left and only the Captain
and I remained. “You look lovely, Mona.”

“Thank you, Captain.”
“Robert, I told you. Please call me, Robert. Would you like to take a walk?

I can’t be long, but I’d enjoy a quick stroll.”
“Yes,” I replied, and tried not to appear as silly or giddy as I felt. I swear,
Renee, I’ve never felt like this in my life!
He walked with his hands clasped behind his back. “I hate that the cruise is
coming closer to the end. I’ve liked seeing you whenever the opportunity
allowed,” he told me as we walked.
“I must admit that this has been a happy time in a somewhat sad life, but I
made a choice,” I added quickly.
He slipped a card in my hand, “My personal contact information. Anytime,
day or night, Mona. I won’t do anything to sway you or put you in an
uncomfortable situation that would jeopardize your family, but I will pray that
something speaks to you and you reach out to me.”
We continued our walk around the ship, and finally, he said, “I have to go
to work for a while. I’ve made arrangements for you and Midge to join me at
my table for dinner, if you’d like.”
“I will look forward to it.”
“And I will hope for that,” he said. He kissed my cheek, and walked away.

Later, I pulled my dress out to get ready for dinner, and looked it over. It
was my favorite dress that I’d brought on the trip. I was zipping it up when
Midge came out of the bathroom. “Well, I see you saved the best for last,” she
said.

I turned to her with a puzzled look on my face, to question what she meant,
but she spoke before I asked.
“It shimmers, it clings in the right places, and that neckline will highlight
your assets,” she laughed.
“Oh, stop,” I said sternly, and I hoped that she didn’t see the smiled that
tickled the corners of my mouth, but so like Midgey, she had.
“Mona…”
“Stop Midge, please don’t say it. It feels wonderful, and I will look good!” I
said, like I meant it. “But it will be no more than that.”
“Mona, don’t stop me. You’re passing on something special, even if it’s only
once.”
“Sex?”
“Well, that too. But my dear, I meant the Captain’s stateroom,” and we
both roared with laughter.

I closed the book.
“Don’t stop now,” Mitchell said anxiously.
“I need to pause. I need to think,” I told him.
“Well, for goodness sake, do it quick!” he announced.
“I want to talk to Midge.”
“Not yet, Renie,” he said. “Wait until we’re done. Right now there are too

many unknowns that you need to get straight before you talk to anyone about
this. It’s just my two cents, but I think you should wait. Don’t talk to Midge
until we’re done and you know the entire story.” He picked up the book and
started reading.

Once more, I was seated next to the Captain. Midge was across from me,
giving me ‘the look’ every chance she got. Robert engaged each guest in
conversation, and it was pleasant. I enjoyed being there very much.

After the meal he left to mingle a while. Midgey was dancing with every man
who asked - you know her! I danced a few times, myself, but I found that I
was waiting for the Captain to return.

Mitchell stopped and put his finger in the book to mark his place.
“I find it funny how she won’t commit to call him ‘Robert’ as he requests.”
“‘Robert’ is personal. I told you, she’s not comfortable with personal yet.

It’s kind of like “Captain” is non-committal. Read!”

The Captain finally came and asked me to dance, and as we took our spin
around the floor, I felt myself melt into his arms.
“Meet me on deck at eleven?” he spoke softly in my ear.
“Yes,” was all I could say.

When we met, we walked to the bow. The moon shone brightly illuminating
the deck.
“Mona,” he said, taking my hand.
“Robert.” I whispered his name because it felt good on my lips.

“Renie, she said his name. She didn’t call him Captain this time,” Mitchell
said.
“Read,” I replied. My insides were in knots, wondering what came next.

“Come with me,” he said, taking my hand in his.
“I want to, but I can’t.”

“Yes, you can. We’ll have a glass of wine or brandy, and we’ll talk. I won’t
push you. Please, just join me.”
So I did.

Mitchell put his finger in the page and closed the book. “If we don’t stop
now we’ll be up all night,” he said.
“I don’t want it to be over, so we should stop. I don’t know how I feel,
right now.” I snuggled closer, as he put the book aside. “Mitchell, do you think
she will?”
“I can’t get a read on it yet,” he said. “I feel the nerves, see the conflict and
the struggle, but I want her to.”
“You do?” I asked and he nodded.
“I hate to say it, but your dad treated her like shit.”
“As sad as it is for me to say, I do too, but I don’t see her making that leap.
I hope she does, and if she does, I hope it’s an amazing experience, because
everyone needs amazing sex once in their life.”
He started to speak, but I covered his mouth with mine in a kiss, and then
whispered, “For me, its a-friggin-mazing-sex every time!”

n

Work was busy the next day when I received a call from my dad.
“How’s business?” he asked.
“Booming! Crazy! Exciting!” I told him, my voice filled with genuine joy as

I said each word. “I have a freezer full of orders. The frozen items seem to be a
better sell than the grab and go, but those are moving, too. Everything validates
what I thought all along – no one has time to cook, the crockpot will make a
comeback, and this is a better alternative than fast food, for some!”

“I’d like to make a reservation. Five for breakfast next Friday?” he asked.
“I can do that for you!” I said.
“Please put aside some of those dinner specialties for me to take home.”
“Any special request?” I asked.
“You know what I like,” he told me.

Mitchell came in at three. Everyone was gone and I was alone tidying up.
“Well, hey there, handsome, you’re early today.” He came to me and wrapped
me in a hug and gave me a kiss that
rocked my world!

“Dang!” I said when he let me go.

“I missed you today.” He hadn’t been able to come at lunch and I’d missed
him, too.
“My dad called earlier,” I told him.
“And?”
“He wanted to make a reservation for breakfast next Friday.”
“Do you find that odd?” he asked.
“A breakfast meeting?” I replied. “No, not really.”
“Think about it, Renie. This side of town? His office and home are clear on
the other side of town.”
“Maybe he just wants to support my business,” I replied, but after I said it,
I didn’t really think so. Now, Mitchell had me wondering, but I wasn’t sure
what to wonder about. I couldn’t imagine anything more than the work
meeting I’d envisioned when he requested the reservation.
“Maybe, and maybe I’m just skeptical,” he replied, “but I’m gonna
rearrange my schedule to be here, just in case.”

That evening, we were anxious to read, and I mean ‘anxious’ in both
respects - uneasy and eager. I kept thinking about the pages in the journal –
they were getting fewer and fewer. I wanted to know the whole story, but I was
full of sadness because when we reached the last page it would be OVER.
There would be no more, and it filled my heart with dread.

I made sandwiches and we curled up on the sofa and Mitchell read.

His stateroom was right by the bridge. It resembled an elaborate, classy,
efficiency apartment. There were three rooms - an office that I could see was
neat and tidy, a bedroom (that I tried not to look in), and a small sitting area
with two chairs and a loveseat. I sat in a chair because I needed distance
between us. My heart was racing and I didn’t want him to know.

“Wine, Scotch or Grand Marnier?” he asked.
“Oh, I haven’t had Grand Marnier in ages, please.”
He poured the drinks and brought mine to me in a beautiful glass. It looked

like a snifter but the stem was missing. I guess I studied the glass a little too
long, because when I looked up he was watching me and smiling.

“A friend from Denmark sent them to me as a gift. Set it down,” he said. I
did, and he added, “See how the glass seems to roll? Watch the movement.
Give it a swirl, now, and bring it to your nose. Inhale the aroma that swirling
brings. Its decadent, don’t you think?”

“Unique.” I told him, and brought the glass to my lips for a sip. “Yes,
decadent, warm, and delightful.”
“As is our evening, Mona.”
“Have you been married?” I don’t know why I asked that question, it just
seemed to roll off my tongue.
“I was. I tried, but my wife found it hard to maintain a relationship with
all of my travel. She was a physician’s assistant and had no desire to travel.
Our life together was like many mini vacations and finally it got old. We’re
friends; we care about each other and talk frequently, but nothing more.”
“After we divorced, I wanted to see more of the world. The trek from
Tampa to Cozumel got old. I jumped to a cruise route in the Mediterranean
for a year. It’s beautiful there, but I wanted shorter excursions after a while
and I ended up here. These trips to the Bahamas are filled with great guests; at
least this particular one leads me to that conclusion.”
He smiled and I nervously took a sip of my drink. “Children?” I asked.
“No. Mona,” he said and patted the place beside him on the sofa. “We’re
making small talk and I want to enjoy this time with you.”
I hesitated before responding, but finally told him, “Robert, I have to be
honest with you - I have no reason not to be - but I’m struggling with this.”
“Take your time. I told you I wouldn’t do anything to push you. I enjoy you
just being here with me. Come sit with me, relax, and enjoy the quiet.”
I sat beside him, but I couldn’t get comfortable. I felt restless and antsy.
“You stir feelings that I haven’t felt in a very long time.”
“I find that to be a good thing,” he smiled.
“I don’t know.” I was so confused that I rose and paced, and after a few
minutes he came to me. It started out as a hug…

“Stop a minute, Mitchell. Please. I need to think,” I said, and found myself
a mess of emotions.
He closed the book and put it aside, waiting.
“I want her to, but I know her. If she does this, if she begins a relationship
with the Captain, she will be a mess of guilt later.”
“Let’s see,” Mitchell said, and started reading again.

His arms around me were a place of comfort and I wanted to stay there, right
there, forever. He tipped my head up and kissed me, and as hard as I tried not to,
it felt so good on my lips that I found myself kissing him back, and enjoying it – all
of it. And then the reality hit me.

He whispered in my ear, “Mona, sit back down a minute, please.”

“Robert, as badly as I want to do that, it will be so much easier if I don’t. I don’t
want to, but I should go.”
“Mona,” he whispered again, “I don’t want you to go.”
“I feel weak and I’m afraid if I stay I won’t want to leave.”
I pulled myself from his embrace.
“Mona…”
I opened the door and walked away without looking back.

“Close the book Mitchell. No more tonight,” I said.

I woke in the middle of the night and couldn’t go back to sleep. I seriously
needed an off-switch for my brain. I slipped out of bed and went to the office,
deciding to explore some new recipes on the Internet. After a while, I needed
to go to the bathroom so I crossed the hall. As I washed my hands, I looked in
the mirror and she was there – only this time she wasn’t smiling. She looked
sad and I swear I heard her tell me, “Read, Renie.”

I went back to bed and kissed Mitchell awake.
“Hey,” he said in a sleep-gravelly voice. “Now?”
“No, not now,” I laughed.
“Damn.” I scooted closer and he wrapped me in his arms and kissed the

top of my head, a gesture that moved me to tears every time he does it. So
tender, so caring...
“Something wrong?” he asked.
“Mitchell, thank you.”
“For?”
“Coming back into my life and loving me, and taking this journey with
Mom, with me.”
“Renie, there isn’t a place on earth that I would rather be. I should thank
you
, for giving us another chance. I prayed for that for so long,” he said, and
held me closer. “But I suspect there’s something else. A visit from your mom?”
“Mmm hmm. I couldn’t sleep and I went to the office to look at recipes.
After a while, I had to pee and when I went to the bathroom…”
“She was there?”
“She was. She told me to read.”
“Well then, that’s what we will do.”
“But it’s 3:40. What about work in the morning.”
“I believe its Cassie’s day today, right?”
“Mmm hmm.”
“Then you’ll call her in a while and tell her you aren’t coming in. She can
handle it. That’s why we hired her, right?”
“Yes,” I said, and snuggled closer as he opened the book.