Confessions and Olivia (Olivia #2) (15 page)

He talks quickly and in a state of urgency. "Okay, can you tell me where I need to be? I’ll tell you everything, I just ..."

I stop him mid-sentence.
"Sure, fine just hurry up please."

I give him Nora’s address in a hurry.
Anything for him to get away from my house, from my street.

"
I’ll be as quick as I can." And he hangs up.

Shit, he's coming here. Mayra’s mom will do her nut. I’ll have to go somewhere with him he can't stay here. I don’t want to bring trouble to Mayra’s mom’s house.

Now the more I think of it the more I’m scared about what he has to tell me. Will it be that bad that I won't want to see him again? I sincerely hope not.

I think over and over in my mind of what it could be. I don't come up with anything logical or that irrational.

I pace the kitchen, watching the ticking clock, biting my nails.

Common Calvin, what's taking you so long?

As if my thoughts had been answered there's a slight knock at the front door.

He's here.

Chapter Fourteen*

"Olivia." He exhales like he’s in pain and immediately inundates me pulling me in to a tight loving embrace on the doorstep. I give in and deflate into his arms, nuzzling my head against his chest while he holds me. Tears find the way down my cheeks and I cry heavy tears. My sobs are hard, painful and relentless. I think about how much I have missed being in his arms. How much I’ve missed his intoxicating smell. His voice. Everything. The love I have for Calvin is compelling. The need for him I feel is overwhelming. This beautiful crazy man who has messed up over and over, fills my life with overpowering joy, happiness and love. Being with him helps me find that solace.

It feels like so long since us. Too long. I hate that I’m giving in but what choice do I have against the power of love?

The sunrise of the cold crisp early morning creep's over us. The street is quiet and deserted, almost feeling peaceful. I could stand here for eternity.

Calvin reluctantly sets me free. "Fuc
k." He curses breathless. "I missed you. I’ve missed you so much." He sounds equally tormented.

My insides melt as tears roll down my cheeks softly. He wipes them away with his thumb, then pushes a loose lock of hair behind my ear.

"Don't cry baby." His forehead rests against mine as he whispers. “I’m so, so sorry."

He kisses my forehead gently
then pulls me into him again, setting me off.

“Oh, Olivia,” he tries to sooth me but I continue to wail. I have been aching for his touch, his attention for so long. I have been pining after him and now he’s here. He’s back, and I can’t stay away from him anymore. I need him with me. I don’t work without him.

I need to sort this. I should hear him out. I have fallen madly, deeply in love with him and the thought of losing him again pains me like a knife through my heart. I can't let it happen. I can't let him go. Not now.
Not ever.

"Don’t leave me again." I whimper pitifully.

"Never." He promises.

I sense Mayra appear behind me in the door way, interrupting our sweet reuniting embrace.

"You two, get inside will you. Canoodling on my front door. Mama will freak."

Me and Calvin are full of gratitude towards her for letting us in.

She takes us into her front room.

"Take as long as you want. I’ll be upstairs." She then turns to Calvin bef
ore she pulls the door to leave. "I like you Calvin, I always have, but hurt her again and you’ll have me to answer to, and yes, that is a threat. I can be your worst nightmare." She warns him with narrowed eyes, firmly pointing her finger in his face. Calvin doesn’t know whether to laugh or take her seriously.

I know she is not joking.

When she's gone, myself and Calvin stare at each other. Each of us at opposite ends of the room. A part of me feels like a stranger towards him, it's been so long for me, yet he's everything I’ve always wanted. The part of me I have always been missing. My eyes drift over the delectable sight of him. From his gorgeously ruffled dark golden hair, to his ice blue eyes. The black mid-length over coat he wears over a grey sweater, black jeans and black boots. Calvin Blake is undeniable flawless. I have missed starting at him this way.

I sense strong lingering tension and I know he has something he wants to say, that's why he's here after all. I still can't believe he's came all the way down here to make it right. He went
searching for me after I told him I was leaving. After I told him not too. He's finally fighting for me.

Calvin pushes his hands through his hair, something he only does when he's nervous or mad.

"Olivia I...I don't know where to start. I felt like I couldn't tell you earlier and when you told me not to follow you, it killed me. I did what you wanted because at the time I knew you meant it. I could see it in your eyes. I kicked myself when you left. I told myself to be a man and be honest for once. How could I lose you for good without even telling you the truth? At least now, when you hear me out, and I’m hoping you will stay, that you will still want me. And if you don’t, at least I can say I tried, and after that I will continue to try. I won't ever give up on you."

I hold back t
ears after his heartfelt speech and advise him softly.

"Start from the beginning."

Whatever he has to say, it won't make a difference to me now. I’m too much in love with him to let something come between us again. I can't do it. I can't fight my feelings for him. I will never lead a fulfilled life without him. Why should I kid myself? My place in life is next to Calvin and his place next to me.
That's how I want it to be.

Calvin stares at me warily. He's scared of saying it I can tell, his eyes are full of fright.

"Okay…Fuck!" He's starting to get angry with himself.

"What it is Calvin?" I push
gently, trying to reassure him it’ll be alright. He needs to be honest. That's all I ask.

He inhales deeply.
"I don't know how to say this. ...but I’m going to try and do as best I can." He inhales again clutching at his hair.

Oh for heaven’s sake
.

He walks towards
me and takes my hands with his. His worried ice blue eyes lock onto mine.

"
Please have an open mind Olivia. I did this with no intention what so ever of hurting you. I didn't realize our relationship would turn out how it did, how it has."

I take my hands out of his and cross them, still waiting, now a little impatient.

I study his body language, he's actually really nervous, something I’ve never seen before.

So am I
.

He begins in a rush, and the more he says the mor
e by heart rate starts to build. "It was all a ploy at first, a simple way of getting more insight, an easier way in if you like. Just to ruin him, ruin everything he has. Everything he loves. Everything he's ever worked for. That was our goal and I think we’ve succeeded so far. But not fully."

I narrow my eyes at him, completely lost in what he's saying. What was a ploy? What is he talking about? Who is he talking about?

He spots the concern and confusion cross my face but I let him finish.

He's about to take my hands again, but I shake my head indicating for him to stay where he is. Like he asked, I will keep an open mind, but with him having physical contact with me doesn’t help me think.

He steps back, nodding that he understands I don’t want him to touch me, and continues, still in a rush and getting angry with himself, or the situation he’s got himself in. I can’t tell.

"Everything was going to plan. Fucking things up for him, his family life disturbed. We made sure the first few mishaps would eventually lead to your uncle, the head of police. We needed to jeopardize their relationship. Putting a stop to the police turning a blind eye on his wrong doings was the first thing we needed to do. At first, doing over his beloved clubs made sure he knew that someone was on to him. We got inside his head, made him think he was going mad. When we blew up the warehouse, it brought so much attention, something the police don't like. You see,
they don’t like people asking questions and that’s what happened. Now they’re not doing business with each other, now he can't get away with all this shit he has, that was the start."

The anger that fills his eyes are familiar. They turn black and his whole body is tense as he speaks. It’s the same way he looked when he saw Mauricio for the first time.

It's disturbing the way he speaks about this, in a way, boastful but with so much rage.

I stay silent, falling numb to the gut feeling that's overcome me about what this is about.

"I wanted to take everything away from him Olivia, everything he had ever cared about. All this was the plan, mine and my brothers."

Him? Who is he talking about?

Wait?

Is he talking about Mauricio?

"Mauricio? You’re talking about Mauricio?" My voice is hoarse as I say what my gut is telling me to.

"Yes, Mauricio." He says as if I should have known this.

Wait, Calvin has been the one who has been doing all this to Mauricio? Him and Ashton? They have been the one’s trying to ruining his reputation? Bringing him down? Causing rifts between my family. How can that be?
It can't.

“You! It
has been you the whole time? You’ve been the one ripping my family apart? Doing those things to Mauricio?”

Oh my god. It’s been Calvin! The man I fell in love with this whole god damn time!

My stomach tenses in response to the sordid news. My head feels spaced out.

Calvin’s eyes shoot open to my
remarks, now he's apprehensive. “Olivia, please don’t look at me like that. I never intended on hurting you.”

How can he say that? My heart is pounding. My body is shaking. I hold onto the side of the sofa to steady myself.

“Why would you do this to us? To my family?”

He walks around the room in despair trying to explain himself but his motive doesn’t become any cle
arer to me. “Because we wanted to hurt him. Ruin him. Bring him down, yes. We wanted to make sure everything he ever cared about was ruined. And then..."

“Then... What?” I whisper, feeling sick to my stomach.

He turns away from me. He can't bring himself to say it, so I do it for him.

“Then kill him Calvin. You wanted to kill Mauricio?”

“Yes, I wanted to kill him.”

My stomach churns as he growls the word…
kill.
The rage consumed in him is scary and unrecognizable.

"Why?" I stare at him stunned.
My voice is a whisper. I fall numb to the news. I was not expecting anything like this to come out of his mouth. I don’t understand.

“Why?” he mocks. “Surly you can answer that for yourself.”

I shake my head hurt and confused, trying to make sense of this but it makes none.

“No. No I can’t, that's why I’m asking. Sure he's an asshole and believe me I hate him right now more than anyone, but kill him? All these things that have been happening to him, with his clubs, his plans that I’ve heard of, our family breaking down. That was you and Ashton? Making him loose his mind? You’ve been plotting against him.” I run my hands through
my hair, trying to take it away from the sweat that has built up on my forehead. I'm burning up in temperature. I don’t know much about this but Mayra told me in our earlier conversation that someone has been fucking around with Mauricio's businesses. They have been trying to bring his name down, trying to damage him and she thinks it’s someone who has a vendetta against him. And those people have been Calvin and Ashton? This is what’s been driving Mauricio to destruction?

“Olivia?” he calls warily.
I turn to him and point accusingly. “That morning when you met him for the first time out my kitchen, you knew who he was didn’t you. That’s why you looked at him the way you did. I just thought it was because of the way he acted towards me but now I can see it was because you were destroying him. You talked me into introducing you so you could wind him up?” I'm asking theoretical questions because he needn’t answer. I thought it was crazy of him to do. He wanted to introduce himself to Mauricio because he knew it would rile him. Why?

The next question I need an
answer to.

“Where do I fit into all this?”

Calvin looks towards me a little anxious saying nothing. His eyes almost painfully apologetic.

Suddenly, it hit's me. The ploy.
I was the ploy?

No! No way. He wouldn’t do that to me would he? A gorgeous man like him going for a plane Jane like me? Shit. Of course, it all makes sense to me now.

The cramps in my stomach become worse. I begin to feel sick, right down into the pit of my stomach sick. My breathing instantly flares up turning into raged intervals. My head is spinning as my world has just come crashing down.

How could he.

"You used me Calvin?” I gasp a distraught breath. “You used me to get to Mauricio as some sort of a cunning plan? You would do that to me?"

Worried Calvin is back as he pales, studying my eyes, my body langua
ge. He is in visible despair. How does he think I feel?

"Olivia, please.
I didn't mean to hurt you.”

“Did you fucking use me?” I scream. My anger is being encouraged by the unknown.

He walks away from me and curses under his breath. “Okay, yes. I used you at first to get to him. I mean, it was the easiest way.”

I can’t be hearing clearly. I shake my
head in antagonizing amazement. My eyes filling up as I watch him.

"You used me?" I whisper again.
“Why?” Who is this fucking guy?

Calvin's eyes shut
while he places his fingers over his mouth. He’s finding it hard to say.

“Yes, I used you. At first. God I hate to say that, but you were an easy target. Such a good girl. I knew you must be the apple of your daddy’s eye. I knew Mauricio hated nothing more than his perfect little family being disturbed, you told me that yourself.”