ACT II
A moment later. As the curtain rises, all are in the same positions they occupied at the end of Act I. Ama and Di-Gou are looking at each other. The choir ends the “Hallelujah Chorus.” Di-gou walks back toward his chair and sits. Ama notices that Chester’s seat is empty.
HANNAH: I heard his violin.
AMA: This is Family Devotions.
ROBERT: The kid’s got a mind of his own.
HANNAH: He probably went home to pack, Auntie. He’s really in a hurry.
JENNY: Can I go look?
AMA: Why everyone want to go?
JENNY: But he forgot his suitcase.
(She points to the green suitcase, which Chester has left behind)
POPO
(To Jenny)
: Di-gou . . . he will want to hear you give testimony.
AMA: Now—Special Testimony. Let us tell of God’s blessing! Who will have privilege? Special Testimony! Who will be first to praise?
(Silence.)
He is in our presence! Open His arms to us!
(Silence.)
He is not going to wait forever—you know this! He is very busy!
(Robert stands up, starts to head for podium. Popo notices that Robert has risen, points to him.)
POPO: No! Not him!
AMA
(To Robert)
: He is very bored with certain people who say same thing over and over again.
WILBUR: Why don’t we sit down, Robert?
JENNY: C’mon, Uncle Robert.
HANNAH: Dear, forget it, all right?
ROBERT: But she needed someone to start. I just—
POPO
(To Robert)
: She did not include you.
WILBUR: Can’t you see how bored they are with that, Robert?
ROBERT: Bored?
WILBUR: Everybody else has forgotten it.
ROBERT: Forgotten it? They can’t.
JOANNE: We could if you’d stop talking about it.
ROBERT: But there’s something new!
WILBUR: Of course. There always is.
ROBERT: There is!
JOANNE
(To Wilbur)
: Don’t pay attention, dear. It just encourages him.
WILBUR
(To Joanne)
: Honey, are you trying to advise
me
on how to be diplomatic?
JOANNE: I’m only saying, if you let Hannah—
WILBUR: You’re a real stitch, you know that? You really are.
JOANNE: Hannah’s good at keeping him quiet.
ROBERT: Quiet?
WILBUR
(To Joanne)
: Look, who was voted “Mr. Congeniality” at the club last week—you or me?
ROBERT: Hannah, who are you telling to be quiet?
HANNAH: Quiet, Robert.
WILBUR
(To Joanne)
: Afraid to answer? Huh? Who? Who was “Mr. Congeniality”? Tell me—were you “Mr. Congeniality”?
JENNY
(To Wilbur)
: I don’t think she stood a chance, Dad.
WILBUR
(To Jenny)
: Who asked you, huh?
JENNY: “Mr. Congeniality,” I think.
WILBUR: Don’t be disrespectful.
AMA: We must begin Special Testimony! Who is first?
POPO: I talk.
JOANNE: Good.
POPO: Talk from here.
(She stands)
Long time since we all come here like this. I remember long ago, family leave China—the boat storm, storm, storm, storm, all around, Hannah cry. I think, “Aaah, why we have to leave China, go to Philippines?” But I remember Jonah, when he did not obey God, only then seas become—ah—dangerous. And ever after, after Jonah eaten by whale, God provide for him. So if God has plan for us, we live; if not
(She looks at Di-gou)
we die.
(She sits)
Okay. That’s all.
AMA: Very good! Who is next?
ROBERT: I said, I’d be happy to—
HANNAH: How about Jenny?
JENNY: Me?
JOANNE: Sure, dear, c’mon.
JENNY: Oh... well...
POPO
(To Di-gou)
: You see—she is so young, but her faith is old.
JENNY: After I do this, can I go see what’s happened to Chester?
POPO
(To Jenny)
: First, serve God.
ROBERT: Let her go.
POPO: Then, you may see about Chester.
JENNY: All right.
(She walks to the podium)
POPO
(To Di-gou)
: I will tell you what each sentence meaning.
DI-GOU: I can understand quite well.
POPO: No. You are not Christian. You need someone—like announcer at baseball game—except announce for God.
JENNY
(At podium, she begins testimony)
: First, I want to say that I love you all very much. I really do.
POPO
(To Di-gou)
: That meaning is, she love God.
JENNY: And I appreciate what you’ve done for me.
POPO
(To Di-gou)
: She love us because we show her God.
JENNY: But I guess there are certain times when even love isn’t enough.
POPO
(To Di-gou)
: She does not have enough love for you. You are not Christian.
JENNY: Sometimes, even love has its dark side.
POPO
(To Di-gou)
: That is you.
JENNY: And when you find that side, sometimes you have to leave in order to come back in a better way.
POPO
(To Di-gou)
: She cannot stand to be around you.
JENNY: Please. Remember what I said, and think about it later.
POPO
(To Di-gou)
: You hear? Think!
JENNY: Thank you.
AMA: Good, good.
JENNY: Can I go now?
ROBERT
(To Hannah)
: What was she talking about?
AMA
(To Jenny)
: Soon, you can be best testifier—do testimony on TV.
JENNY: Can I go now?
JOANNE: All right, Jenny.
JENNY: Thanks.
(Exits)
ROBERT
(To Popo)
: Why don’t you interpret for
me
? I didn’t understand what she was talking about. Not a bit.
POPO: Good.
ROBERT: Good? Don’t you want me to be a better Christian?
POPO: No. Not too good. Do not want to live in same part of Heaven as you.
ROBERT: Why not? It’ll be great, Popo. We can tell stories, sing—
POPO: In Heaven, hope you live in basement.
ROBERT: Basement? C’mon, Popo, I’m a celebrity. They wouldn’t give me the basement. They’ll probably recognize my diplomacy ability, make me ambassador.
JOANNE: To Hell?
ROBERT: Well, if that’s the place they send ambassadors.
POPO: Good. You be ambassador.
AMA: Special Testimony! Who is next?
ROBERT
(Asking to be recognized)
: Ama?
AMA
(Ignoring him)
:
Who is next?
ROBERT: Not me. I think Wilbur should speak.
AMA
(Disgusted)
: Wilbur?
WILBUR: Me?
ROBERT: Yeah.
WILBUR: Well, I don’t really . . .
ROBERT: Tell them, Wilbur. Tell them what kind of big stuffs happen to you. Tell them how important you are.
WILBUR: Well, I...
AMA
(Reluctantly)
: Would you . . . like to speak . . . Wilbur?
WILBUR: Well, I’d be honored, but if anyone else would rather...
ROBERT: We want to hear what you have to be proud of.
WILBUR: All right.
(Wilbur takes the podium; Ama scurries away.)
Uh—well, it’s certainly nice to see this family reunion.
Uh—last week, I was voted Mr. Congeniality at the club.
ROBERT: What papers was it in?
WILBUR: Huh?
ROBERT: Was it in the
L.A. Times
? Front page? Otis Chandler’s paper?
HANNAH
(A rebuff)
: Robert!
POPO
(To Robert)
: Devotions is not question-and-answer for anyone except God.
ROBERT: God sometimes speaks through people, doesn’t He?
POPO: He has good taste. Would not speak through you.
ROBERT
(Undaunted, to Wilbur)
: Show me one newspaper clipping. Just one!
WILBUR: Well, besides the
Valley Green Sheet
. . .
ROBERT: The
Valley Green Sheet
? Who pays for that? Junk. People line their birdcages with it.
WILBUR: Well, I suppose from a media standpoint, it’s not that big a deal.
AMA
(To Joanne)
: What means “congeniality”?
JOANNE: It means “friendly,” sort of.
ROBERT
(To Wilbur)
: So why are you talking about it? Waste our time?
WILBUR: Look, Robert, it’s obviously a token of their esteem.
ROBERT: Junk stuffs. Little thing. Who cares?
AMA
(To herself)
: “Mr. Friendly”?
ROBERT: It’s embarrassing. What if clients say to me, “You’re a bank president but your relative can only get into the
Valley Green Sheet
”? Makes me lose face. They think my relatives are bums.
AMA
(To Joanne)
: He is “Mr. Friendly”?
WILBUR: Look, Robert, the business is doing real well. It’s not like that’s my greatest accomplishment.
AMA
(To Joanne)
: How can he be “Mr. Friendly”? He always kill and laugh.
JOANNE: Mom!
ROBERT
(To Wilbur)
: Does your business get in the paper?
WILBUR: Computer software happens to be one of the nation’s fastest-growing—
ROBERT: So what? Lucky guess. Big deal.
WILBUR: It was an educated choice, not luck!
(Robert gets up, starts to head for the podium.)
ROBERT: Anyone can make money in America. What’s hard is to become . . . a celebrity.
WILBUR: You’re not a celebrity.
ROBERT: Yes, I am. That’s the new thing. See, I just wanted to say that—
(Robert nudges Wilbur off the podium, takes his place.)
—when I was kidnapped, I didn’t know if I would live or die.
POPO
(Turns and sees Robert at the podium)
: Huh?
JOANNE: Robert, forget it!
POPO: How did he get up there?
WILBUR
(To Joanne)
: I’m perfectly capable of handling this myself.
POPO: He sneak up there while we are bored!
WILBUR
(To Popo)
: I’m sorry you found my testimony boring.
ROBERT
(To Wilbur)
: It was.
(To the assemblage)
Now hear mine.
JOANNE: We’ve all heard it before.
HANNAH
(To Robert)
: They’re tired, dear. Get down.
ROBERT: Why? They listened to Wilbur’s stuff. Boring. Junk.
JOANNE: “I didn’t know if I would live or die.” “I didn’t know if I would live or die.”