Lipstick and Lies (21 page)

‘Okay,’ I let out a shaky breath.
‘I can identify wit
h some of what you’re saying.’

Selina nodded.
‘
So, t
ruce?’
She
extended
a hand.
I stared at it.
I really didn’t want to take it.
‘You don’t have to like me Cass.
You just have to tolerate me.’

Tolerate.
That word again.
Only this morning, while walking in the park, Morag had said the very same thing.
“You don’t have to
be
her friend, just
tolerate
her.”
Everybody had said it.
Jamie.
Edna.
Nell.
Morag.
And now Selina herself.
There was so much to lose.
And everything to gain.
I had my husband’s career to think of.
And my children’s future.
They were growing up fast now.
Before I knew it they would
be wanting
driving lessons.
Cars.
Money to pay for university.
More money to pay for digs.
And then there was Eddie’s schooling.
Only a little while ago Morag had been talking about enrolling Henry in a
n exclusive
prep school for boys.
“There’s a three year waiting list Cass.
The education is second to none.
Just think how wonderful it would be to give Eddie such a golden opportunity to fulfil his potential.
Our boys could go on to
Eton
!
They might even be Prime Minister one day!”
And whilst I
was pretty
damn
sure my baby boy wasn’t going to be walking in David Cameron’s shoes, I understood Morag’s fundamental reasoning.
All mothers
want
the best for their children.
And if there was any way of guaranteeing the best for one’s child, what mother wouldn’t go the extra mile?
Could I go that extra mile now?
It was a no-brainer.
Sel
ina’s hand remained proffered.

‘I’ll never be your friend,’ I told h
er, ‘but I will tolerate you.’

And then I took her hand.

After Selina had taken herself off downstairs, I gave my hair a quick blast of the dryer, pulled on some jeans and a clean sweater and then went to find Jamie.
He was in the kitchen giving Eddie a bottle
while
chatting to Edna.
My mother-in-law
immediately excused herself on the pretext of wanting to watch a DI
Y programme on the television.

‘How’s my hubby?’ I kissed Jamie on the mouth
and pulled
up a chair next to him.

‘I’m good.
And what about Florence Nightingale?’ he teased.
‘I hear you’ve started a new career
in midwifery.’

I grinned.
‘Mother and baby are doing fine.
And Ben too – after his bang on the head.
What a performance,’ I tutted.
‘But never mind that for now.
I’ve hardly seen you this evening.
You were on the phone for ages.
Any progress with Ethan’s business trip?’
I
leant forward and
stroked Eddie’s hand while he was glugging.
His chubby fingers gripped m
ine
.

‘Ethan is flying home tomorrow.
He’s delivered!
The
American b
ank is officially our client.
This is going to open so many more doors Cassie.
I can’t tell you what a great feeling it i
s,’ Jamie exhaled with relief.

‘That’s fantastic news,’ I smiled.
‘So
the hard work is paying off.’

‘And some.’

I looked around.
Dropped my voice an octave.
‘Has Selina gone home?’

‘No.
She’s in the study talking to Ethan.
I must take her
home
when she’s finished the call.’

I straightened up.
‘Didn’t she drive here?’

‘Her car is at the garage.
Some mechanical problem.
She took a taxi here.’

‘So let her take a taxi home.’

Jamie pulled a face.
‘It would be
rude not to offer her a lift.’

I could do rude.
‘
Greenwich
isn’t just around the corner Jamie.
And you’re tired.’
The doorbell rang.
Eddie was almost asleep in Jamie’s arms.
‘Who can that be?’

‘Maybe it’s my mother’s admirer,’ Ja
mie waggled his eyebrows.

‘Ooh yes.
Amorous Arthur.
With a bouquet of spanners.’
I stood up.

‘I’d like to meet this chap.
Mum was doing quite a bit of mentionitis while you were upstairs.
Arthur strokes his planer this way.
Arthur prefers screwing to banging.
I had great trouble keeping a straight face.’
The doorbell rang again.
‘You see who it is while I take
this little fellow up to bed.’

But when I opened the front door, I wasn’t greeted by a pensioner with a big tool and a twinkle in his eye.
Instead my ex-husband stood there,
his face partially shadowed thanks to the angle of the p
orch’s courtesy light.

‘Hi Cass.
Sorry to turn up unexpectedly,’ Stevie smiled apologetically, ‘but your mobile was switched off and the landline seems to be constantly en
gaged.’

‘Ah yes.
Someone is indeed using our phone at the moment.
And I switched my mobile off earlier because I was at the hospital.
Nell’s finally had her baby.
A little girl.
Oh my goodness – I clean forgot to tell Morag.
I must text her.’

‘That’s great news
about Nell
.
Give
her and Ben
my love.’

‘I will.
Anyway, come in out of the cold.’
I shut the door on the freezing night air.
‘Would you like a cup of
coffee
?’

‘
Sure.
Why not.’

Stevie followed me through to the kitchen.
I picked up the kettle.
Empty.
‘Is everything all right?’ I asked
.
Shoving the kettle under the water spout, I hit the
tap too hard.
Water dropl
ets sprayed across my sweater.

‘Yeah,’ Stevie slid out of his jacket and hung it over the back of a chair.
‘I was just missing the kids and thought it would be nice to say hello.’
He sat down near the range
, rubbing his hands together for warmth
.

‘I’m sure they’ll be thrilled to see you.
Do you want to take them out f
or an ice-cream or something?’

On the whole
,
my ex and I were on reasonably good speaking terms.
And where the children were concerned, we’d made sure there had never been conflict.
The twins’ emotional well-being was of paramount importance to us.
Despite Stevie’s womanising, I’d never bad-mouthed him to Livvy and Toby.
Whatever Stevie’s faults as a husband, he’d been a good father.
Withholding access as a means of revenge – like some wo
men – had never been my style.

‘It’s a bit cold for ice-cream,’ Stevie chuckled.
‘Anyway, it’s a school night
so I don’t want
them being late back
.
They’ll be with me this weekend so
there’s
time for ice-cream then.
I ju
st wanted to give them a hug.’

‘I’ll call them down.’
As I
made the coffee
, I couldn’t help noticing
how tired my ex-husband looked
.
The corners of his mouth were uncharacteristically turned down.
‘What’s up?
You look like the weight of th
e world is on your shoulders.’

‘Oh
,’ he shrugged, ‘this and that.’
He accepted the coffee and stirred in some sugar.
‘A
ctually
,
Charlotte and I aren’t see
ing eye to eye at the moment.’

‘What’s new,’ I grinned.
Charlotte
had been Stevie’s live-in lover for the best part of a year.
Give or take a month here and there when she packed her bags and stalked off home to Mother.
A statistician would surely have put the odds on
Charlotte
– stunningly beautiful and half Stevie’s age – as being the one to give
him
the run around.
And whilst
young
lads
did
occasionally beat their chests and vie for her attention, for some bizarre reason she only had eyes for my ex.
There was no denying Stevie was in good shape for his age, and he had a silver tongue when it came to charismatic chat-up lines.
But at the end of the day, no matter how you dressed his personality up, he was still a cad with a wandering eye
.
He
never said no to an extra-curricular leg over.
A psychologist
might have
diagnose
d
Stevie
as
suffering
anxiety over
the aging process
– that
he was a man worried about the
shelf life
of his pulling power.
After all, e
verybody’s sex appeal had a sell-by-date
.
But for Stevie it was a struggle to come to terms with.
Hence the
tom cat
behaviour
.
Even
Charlotte
’s parents despaired of their daughter not wising up and dumping Stevie permanently.
Perhaps it boiled down to the
treat ’em mean keep ’em keen
mentality.
But
Stevie’s
relationship was no business of mine.
I was just relieved to be free of the shoes
Charlotte
now walked in.

‘She wants a baby,’ Stevi
e rubbed his forehead wearily.

‘Ah,’ I pulled out a chair and sat down
opposite him, ‘and you don’t.’

‘Definitely not.
I’ve been there.
Done that.
And in all honesty Cass, much as I love our kids to bits, I look back and sometimes wonder–’

‘What?’ I prompted.

‘Well.
You know.
I wonder if we’d still be together if we hadn’t become parents.
Blokes like me – I’m not making excuses for my past behaviour – but when your partner is big with child and then subsequently knackered with a newborn,’ he shrugged.
Took a sip of
coffee
.
‘It can put the best of
relationships under pressure.’

‘Jamie and I have had a baby.
Eddie is wonderful
.
W
e
certainly
have no regrets.’

‘Yes but Eddie isn’t the glue in your relationship.
You and Jamie were good in the first place.
Charlotte
and I have never been solid.’

‘Then you’ll have
to tell her straight I guess.’

‘Mmm.
I did.
She took it badly,’ Stevie looked sheepish, ‘which is another reason why I’ve come out this evening.
The air at home is poisonous.’

‘Oh dear.’

At that moment Toby came into the kitchen looking for a TV snack to take up to his room.
‘Dad!’ he put his arms around Stevie and gave him a hug.
‘Jonas has Paranormal Activity on DVD.
Want to watch it with us?’

‘Is that su
itable viewing?’ Stevie asked.

‘Probably not,’ Toby grinned
.
H
e extricated
himself from Stevie and palmed
a family sized
bag
of crisps from the larder.

I checked my watch.
‘You can have an hour’s viewing Tobes
,
but then I want
all four of you
in the shower.
School tomorrow remember.’