Authors: Monica Alexander
“Seriously?” I was shocked that my brother was an artist. Add that to the list of things I’d never bothered to find out
about him
. “Wow.”
It
was def
initely a morning of surprises. Suddenly, all the things that felt a little off that summer came back to me in a rush, and I didn’t know why I hadn’t see
n
the signs earlier. Rachel freaking out that I, really Chase, was leaving for the summer, Chase and Rachel seeming to have become friends at some point, her number programed in his cell phone and the relief she felt when, apparently Chase, not ‘Michael’, had surprised her when he was supposed to be in Raleigh with Molly, potentially cheating on his girlfriend. Then there was the way Chase had been freaking out the day before when Rachel had arrived, how rigid he’d found out she’d slept with Derrick and his surprising behavior when he’d put Derrick in his place, and probably threatened him for hitting on Rachel. Good Lord I was dense. How had I not realized this sooner?
“
So
you really like him?” I asked, still in slight disbelief.
She smiled widely
and nodded. “I love him.”
“Really?” I asked, never thinking I would hear those wor
ds from Rachel, let alone
about Chase.
“Yeah.
I do.”
She was grinning so widely, that I knew she wouldn’t have been able to wipe it off her face for anything.
“He loves you, too?” I asked, a little louder than I should have.
“Yeah, I do,” came Chase’s voice from the doorway.
Rachel’s head snapped up, and sh
e locked eyes with my brother.
His
dark
hair
,
not so dark anymore,
as it had lightened a bit in
th
e sun
,
was wet and sticking up.
He had a pair of khaki shorts on with a black hoodie
, and he was smirking down at Rachel
, as if he was embarrassed, but excited about what he’d just admitted
to her
.
“You do?” she asked.
He
smiled, his smirk stretching into a grin to match Rachel’s
, and nodded.
“Hell yeah, I do.”
With that
Rachel leapt off my bed, ran over to Chase
,
and t
hrew her arms around his neck.
I had to look away when she kissed him, because it was just too disturbing to watch.
“I love you, too,” I heard her say, as I looked intently out
the window at the clear blue sky
.
La, la, la, la, la. I can’t hear my brother making out with my best friend.
Chase
laughed.
“Yeah,
I heard.”
“I wanted to tell you sooner,” she said, “but I was afraid you didn’t feel the same way.”
He kissed her again. “Rach, I’ve felt that way for a while. It’s cool.”
I heard them kissing again.
“Okay, don’t mind me,” I said loudly, still not looking at them.
“It’s safe, you can look,” Rachel said, and I could hear the
utter happiness in her voice.
It made me wonder
if
that was h
ow Zack and I looked together.
Something told me it was.
As I turned to look, I saw them both grinning, as the
y st
ood in my doorway.
Chase’s arm was
lung over Rachel’s shoulders
,
and her arms
were
wrapped around his waist
.
“Okay, fine,” I said begrudgin
gly. “I’m happy for you guys!
Now go get a room already.”
“Okay,” Chase said, as he
grabbed Rachel
around
t
he waist and pulled
her
out of my room. S
he squealed in delight
at his caveman style attack
.
I shook my head, laughing lightly as I heard them make their way down the hall and into Chase’s room, trying my hardest not to think about what was about to transpire behind his closed door.
I texted Zack when we got to the beach
later that day
, but he didn
’t respond.
I had to gue
ss that he’d gone back to bed.
I was dying to see him, to tell him the bombshell news I’d learned that morning, but
I
also just wanted to see him.
I’d g
ive him in a few hours to sleep
b
efore I went over to his house to drag him out to hang with us. It was a gorgeous day.
Rachel and Chase finally joined Keely and me about an hour after we’d gone down to the beach
, which gave me a chance to fill Keely in the relationship our brother had been hiding all summer. Her reaction was almost identical to mine, but she still couldn’t mask her disbelief when they walked up to us
holding hands
.
I wasn’t sure if it was something I’d ever get used to seeing
, but bo
th of
them looked happier than ever, which thrilled me to no end.
All day
I saw a different side of my brother as he laughed and played with Rachel in the oc
ean. It was incredibly different from the day before when they’d had to hide what was going on between them
.
Chase
was
just as
sweet
as he’d been, but he took advantage of every opportunity to kiss or
touch her
, which he’d refrained from before
.
I
could tell they were in love.
When Chase
left to get us drinks, I took my opportunity to dig for
as many
details
as I could stomach.
I could go a lifetime without
hearing about what they did when they were alone, but I’d be an awful best friend if I didn’t let Rachel
download the details of
her new relationship.
“So, you seem
so
happy,” I said.
She turned to face me.
“I’m very happy.”
“What are you going to do next year?”
Distance had been on my mind a lot that summer
,
as I thought about what would happe
n to Zack and
me after
I returned to UNC. We hadn’t discussed the future at all, and I was afraid to bring it up for fear of knowing that it was stupid for us to even consider staying together. We’d only met a few weeks earlier. It seemed fruitless to even think about doing long distance
, even thou
gh I wanted it more than anything
.
Rachel looked introspective for a minute. “We haven’t really talked about it, but I assume we’ll stay together.”
She said it so casually as if there wasn’t really another option outside of staying together.
“You’re okay with being in a long distance relationship?”
Rachel shru
gged. “I want to be with Chase.
I don’t really have any other options outside of long distance at this point. Besides, it’s only until graduation. You know I’m moving back to the city
in June
.”
I nodded. “But you won’t get to see him hardly at all during the year.”
“Flights go to New York City every day, Emily,”
Rachel cha
stised me. “I can see him whenever I want.
Besides, he’ll be home for Thanksgiving and Christmas, and we can get together over
s
pring break
. It won’t be
that
bad.”
“What about date functions and f
ormals? Will he come down for those?”
I couldn’t exactly see my brother dressing up and attending one of our
Gamma Pi
events, especially the ones that had themes. Chase definitely wasn’t a fan of costumes that required the wearing of Hawaiian shirts or flannel and cowboy hats. He’d hate having to sit on a log in the woods, drinking beer with frat guys like Ben
,
who most girls in
Gamma Pi
dated. Then again, if he truly loved Rachel, he might just be willing to dress up and accompany her to our annual
woodser in October or our l
uau in the spring.
I might even pay
good money
to see my brother sport a lei.
Rachel bit her lip. “Um, I’ve actually been meaning to talk to you about that, Em,” she said, and I could see she looked nervous.
I raised my eyebrows skeptically at her, wondering if she was about to drop a bomb on me.
“I’m pretty sure I’m actually quitting
Gamma Pi
this year,” she said quietly, pausing to gauge my reaction.
My eyes got wide, and I knew the hurt in them was apparent.
Gamma Pi
was something Rachel and I did together. Initially she’d been skeptical about rushing, but I thought she really liked the girls and the sisterhood. She’d even loved it when we lived in the house together our sophomore year. True, I had toyed with the idea of leaving our sorority earlier in the summer, but it was really just a passing emotional thought. I was honestly excited about my senior year
in the house.
“Why?” I asked in disbelief, narrowing my eyes at her. “Is it because Chase thinks it stupid? Because honestly, Rachel, I never thought you’d be one of those girls who did s
omething just
to impress a guy.”
Rachel narrowed her eyes right back at me. “No, Emily, I’m not one of those girls, and I would think as my best friend you would know me just a little better than that. I kind of made the decision last spring.”
“Last spring?!”
She nodded. “Yeah, when I took that internship in New York, I assumed I would be really disa
ppointed that I would miss the l
uau and
the spring f
ormal and all the socials, but I didn’t. I actually found a lot of other things I liked doing better than prancing around as a naughty school girl or a biker chick.
And
I
really
didn’t miss
going to c
hapt
er m
eetings every Monday night. I think I just sort of outgrew it.
Besides, it kind of keeps me busy on the weekends, and I know I’ll want to fly up to New York as much as I
can or spend time with Chase when
he flies down to
North Carolina.
”
I shook my head. “So this
is
about Chase,” I accused.
Rachel closed her eye
s and took a deep breath. “I
t’s not about Chase, but I am in love with him
,
and we want to be together. It’s what people do when they find the person they want to be with. I don’t look at it like I’m giving anything up. I’m gaining so much more that will be longer lasting than the sisterhood of
Gamma Pi
ever would be for me. I’m sorry you don’t understand.”
I felt a twinge in my stomach
at her words
and but realized it wasn’t because of what she’d said. I actually did understand, but I also knew my situation was incredibly different from hers. Zack didn’t love me. He wasn’t asking me to even be his girlfriend, let alone survive a year of separation. I also didn’t have the security that my future and his would collide. I had no idea where I’d be moving after graduation or
even
what I’d be doing, and I knew Zack had an even dimmer view of his future.
We were in a completely different place than Chase and Rachel.
Thankfully Chase returned soon after, pulling Rachel’s attention away from me when he suggested we grab lunch. Keely
wanted to go to a
popular burger place
on the island that
Zack had introduced me to, so
I tried his cell again to see if he wanted to meet up with us, but his phone just went to voicemail. It was strange since he always had his phone on him and didn’t usually take long to call
me
back. I instantly started to worry that something had happened to him.
When he hadn’t called me back by the end of lunch, my stomach was in knots. So instead of joining everyone else back at the beach, I walked down to
his
hous
e to see if his family might kno
w where he was.
As I approached, I realized that the
house seemed abnormally quiet. The windows that were normally wide open
were closed
, and no one was on the front po
rch. I looked down at the house
Molly, Leo and their families were staying in and saw the same eerie scene. It was strange. Even if they went to the beach, their houses were never closed up like that.
I noticed
then
that there were
also
no cars in the driveway
s either. Maybe they’d all
taken a day trip, but if that was the case
, Zack would have mentioned it the night before.