Throwaway (16 page)

The retort died in her throat. His eyes were
anguished and she knew her lash out had hurt him. She sighed
heavily. “I don’t know why you make me so crazy.”

A slow smile crossed his face as he lowered
his head to brush her lips with his own. The kiss turned slow and
torturous. It brought with it a smoldering fire that wound its way
through her. She arched into him, a whimper escaping her throat.
Something about the sound snapped his restraint. His passion
unleashed hers and she greedily sought more of him. Always more of
him.

It was dizzying. It was delicious. She
couldn’t help but cry as he held her to his chest, stroking her
back as they lay on the oversized lounge, their skin warmed by the
others’ touch and cooled by the breeze that danced about them.

She wanted to proclaim that she’d love him as
long as there was breath in her body but didn’t know how to without
sounding like a fool. How did she even know it was love? She had no
point of reference. There was nothing in her past to indicate she
was even capable of loving. Not that long ago Harmony had to tell
her what a crush felt like.

“A twenty for your thoughts.”

“The price has gone up that much, huh?”

“I figured I had to compete with other
sources of revenue.”

“You are such a jerk. And I make way more
than that. Made, actually.”

“You haven’t answered the question.”

“Nothing to say. My brain was completely
empty just then.”

“That can’t be true. I bet you were at least
thinking about what a great lover I am.”

“Wow. If the cop/soldier gigs don’t work out,
you really should consider being a psychic. Truly astounding.”

“Aw, now you’re just being hateful.”

“Yeah, I am,” she smiled, tracing lazy
circles up and down his side. “I’m being hateful because I don’t
want you to leave.”

“I don’t want to go, either. But I’ll be back
before you know it.”

She wished she could believe him.

Mother Nature was kind enough to cater to
Jessie’s mood the next morning. A gray, cold drizzle had settled
over the city. She went through the motions of making Spence’s
breakfast and listening to his random thoughts on life as they
played another round of Rummy.

The drizzle turned into a steady rain and
Jessie excused herself to go lie down. She noticed a flashing red
light on the cell phone when she pulled her book out of the drawer
by her bed. Tears burned her eyes as she listened to the message
from Gabe three times before grudgingly erasing it. She didn’t want
someone stumbling across his assurances that all would be well or
his reminder that he loved her.

She curled up with the phone, letting the
rain and the memories lull her to sleep. Her subconscious was given
room to play, and in her dreams Gabe’s rich laughter still rumbled.
His voice stroked her weary spirit. His hands were there to comfort
and arouse.

Commotion erupted in the loft, causing Jessie
to shoot up from the bed. Vance burst into her room, his expression
dire.

“What did you do?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” she
struggled to clear her head of the nap-induced fog.

“Coleman was arrested today; three girls were
removed from his property. The warehouse was raided. Aleksandar is
on the warpath. He thinks he has a mole.”

“And the first place he’s looking is at the
guy that was skimming cash? Does he really think Spence is that
stupid?”

“Oh he doesn’t think Spence is the mole—he
thinks Spence is the one dumb enough to let a pretty woman get the
best of him.”

“Oh,” she absorbed that information. “You
should leave. Distance yourself from me.”

“I’m not going anywhere. There’s no time even
if I wanted to—I’m surprised I beat them here.”

“What did you think would happen?” She held
his eyes for a moment. “Spence was dead anyway. Don’t put this at
my feet.”

“What’s at your feet?” Spence leaned heavily
against her doorframe.

“Aleksandar’s boys are on their way over.
They think Jessie is working with the cops,” Vance answered.

“Are you?” Spence’s voice was low and
calm.

Jessie instinctively put the bed in between
them as her gaze met his.

“I see,” he took a deep breath. “I really
should have seen that one coming.”

“What you’re doing isn’t right. Those girls…
they aren’t property. They’re people.”

“No, they’re Aleksandar’s property. Just like
you’re my property.”

“You’ve been so close to human this week, I
almost forgot,” her jaw jutted defiantly.

“Where is he?” Vance interrupted, demanding
Jessie’s attention. “Does he have a way to extract you?”

“He’s in Afghanistan… well, on his way.”

Vance muttered a terse expletive under his
breath. “So he let you do his dirty work and left you to face the
fallout?”

“It’s not like that.”

“Who’s he?” Spence frowned.

“What is it like?” Vance demanded. “How the
hell am I supposed to get you out of here?”

“I’ll get myself out.”

“You did this for some guy?” Color flooded
Spence’s face and he trembled with rage. He made a lunge for
Jessie, falling short of his goal. The phone clattered to the floor
as he landed on the bed. His attention turned from Jessie to the
cell. “This is from him, isn’t it?”

She made a grab for it but he beat her there,
shoving her away as he scooped up the prize.

“Give that to me,” she held her hand out,
wishing it didn’t tremble as she did so.

“Maybe you’re right—I don’t know you. I
underestimated how cold you could be.”

“Or how far you could push me,” she refused
to back down. “I don’t belong to you Spence. I don’t belong to any
man.”

With a wounded howl of rage, Spence hurled
the phone with all of the force he could muster. It exploded
against the wall as the front door burst open. Aleksandar strode
through the door, a grim smile spreading across his face when his
one good eye landed on Jessie. With a nod, the three of them were
surrounded and escorted to the SUV waiting in front of the
building.

“I knew you were trouble. I told myself that
when I first saw you on Spence’s arm—you know that?” Aleksandar
never took his eyes off of Jessie. “I considered keeping you after
Spence was dispensed of.”

“What’s the saying about borrowing trouble?”
Jessie arched an eyebrow.

“The fiery ones are the most fun to
break.”

“Get a saddle out and I will feed you your
own…”

“Jessie…” Vance cut her off.

“Sadly, we won’t get to see how that would
have worked out—it sounds fun, really. But if I let you live after
today, well then I’ve just sent the message that I’m weak. I can’t
let people think that, can I?”

“It’s worth a shot,” Jessie shrugged. Spence
stared at her as if she’d grown a second head. Vance now seemed
resigned to the fact that Jessie’s mouth was sealing their
fate.

“You would have been fun,” he stroked her
cheek with one long finger.

“Still could be,” Jessie offered in her most
sultry voice.

“Valiant attempt, Jessie, but I don’t think
so,” his attention turned to Vance for the first time. “Now, to be
honest, I’m still figuring you out.”

“How so?”

“I can’t decide if you would be an asset or
as much trouble as the girl.”

Vance’s expression remained impassive.

“If you don’t mind waiting until I’ve tended
to these two, I’d like to speak with you before making a
decision.”

“Take all the time you need,” he replied
calmly.

“Good to know I surrounded myself with such
loyalty,” Spence pouted.

“This from the man who was cheating me?”
Aleksandar observed. “I took a chance on you because I was assured
of your talents. I see now that was a mistake.”

Spence stared out the window, watching the
raindrops snake trails across the glass. Jessie watched the city
she loved pass by and felt strangely hollow. She expected to feel
fear or sadness as the SUV crossed the bridge into Illinois and
headed north. Instead, there was a piece of her that felt almost
relieved the battle was over. She was so very tired.

Out-of-body experiences were becoming
strangely normal for Jessie these days. That’s how it seemed as she
and Spence were loaded onto a 20-foot boat and lined up along the
railing. Jessie didn’t begrudge Vance for standing with their
captors. He’d never made any bones about his intention to stay
alive at any cost. He certainly hadn’t asked for any of this.

There was no sun to sink in the horizon, but
gray skies turned to black signaling the arrival of night. Jessie
closed her eyes, focusing on the wind and the stinging rain pelting
her face. If this was to be her last sensation, she wanted to
experience it fully.

She knew the Mississippi would ravage their
bodies and if they should turn up, they’d become a message to
anyone else who might want to go against Aleksander.

“I’m not mad at you anymore,” Spence
interrupted her thoughts.

“You’re not mad at me?” Jessie’s eyes flew
open. “Really? Because if I remember correctly, you’re the one that
got involved with these people first. Everything that’s happened
since then points straight back to your initial decision.”

“Truce?” he suggested with an odd little
smile.

Jessie couldn’t help half a smile of her own.
She took a breath to tell him she accepted his truce when the sound
of gunfire exploded in her ear. A shocked expression was forever
etched on Spence’s face as he fell backwards over the railing.

Just like that, he was gone. Jessie didn’t
have time to process the picture of the mighty Mississippi gobbling
up the offering. She blinked once, took a deep breath, and dove in
just as the second shot rang out.

She thought she heard Vance shout, but the
boat, the rain and the sound of several tons of dirt being carried
downstream all resounded in her ears. Were those more shots?

There was so much dirt in the big brown
water; she could taste the metallic grit. The boat didn’t even slow
down. She allowed herself a split second to catch her bearings; the
river clawed at her legs, pulling her towards its hidden
secrets.

Her earlier apathy disappeared as a voice
somewhere inside of her shouted “swim.” She obeyed.

Using every one of her carefully honed
muscles, she began to fight the river. She was disoriented and
exhausted, but she continued to slice through the rapidly moving
current. All of her life she’d heard warnings about this
Mississippi—those who went in didn’t come out—she now ruthlessly
shoved the memories of those warnings aside.

She did not know how long she swam. Her sole
focus was propelling herself towards the shoreline she knew would
be there. Fears of man-sized alligator gar lurking below with their
wicked teeth toyed with her. Did they eat flesh? She couldn’t
remember. She did remember seeing one in a tank once and that was
enough to urge her onward.

The constant tug of the current wore at her.
Some time after her muscles began screaming in protest, they went a
fuzzy kind of numb. When at last she crawled up on a muddy
riverbank, she was too exhausted to worry about things like water
moccasin holes. She did not know where she was, but it was solid
ground and for the moment that would have to be good enough.

It was dark—dark enough she knew she was
still a ways off from the city. For the first time in her life, she
was alone in the woods, undoubtedly in one of several parks that
dotted the riverfront north of St. Louis. Tremors wracked her body
as she trembled from the exertion and the cold. She wedged herself
in between a grove of trees to block the wind and allowed the
darkness to overcome her.

She awoke disoriented and unable to focus on
much beyond how incredibly tired her body was. Light filtered
through the trees. Somewhere in the distance she could hear a
family bickering. The mother thought they were lost. The father
swore they were not. A teenager bemoaned the idiocy of her parents.
A younger child apparently picked some poison ivy as a souvenir.
The clichéd scene made Jessie smile. Then it made her wonder if she
was lying in poison ivy.

Once she ascertained that she was not in a
bed of itch-inducing plants, she leaned against the tree and closed
her eyes. She knew she needed to get to the Plymouth, but the
question was how. It was on the south side of the city and she was
pretty far north. She was also covered in Mississippi grime without
a penny to her name.

It was hard deciding much; with her eyes
closed, visions of Spence’s demise plagued her. Her eyes flew back
open, brimming with tears. Had she and Gabe done that to him or had
he done it to himself? Did she have blood on her hands?

But the girl was free. A lot of girls were
free now. That had to count for something. She wished Gabe were
there. Had he known about the raid and left her to face it alone?
She didn’t think so.

But now was not the time to sit and wonder
about things that were really neither here nor there. Now, she had
to figure out how to get to an address in Affton on the south side
of St. Louis.

With that goal fixed in her mind, she stood
and brushed herself off before realizing with a wry smile that the
effort was futile. She fought the underbrush until she stumbled
onto a path, eliciting a startled scream from the mother of the
bickering family.

“Sorry folks,” Jessie held up her hands in a
gesture of surrender. “Didn’t mean to scare you.”

“Are you alright?” the man studied her with a
frown.

“Fine, thank you,” Jessie tried to smile
reassuringly.

“What are you doing out here?”

“What are you doing out here?” she tossed
back.

“Communing with God,” the teenager answered
with a derisive sneer directed at her mother.