Authors: Leta Blake
Zach grabbed a piece of the bread. “You don’t mind sharing?”
Leith was tempted to grab it back, thinking that somehow that would be the right thing to do, but he simply shrugged.
“See you tomorrow, Leith.”
“See you.” Leith said, watching the door shut behind Zach. He smelled his fingers. The sweet-spicy scent of Zach’s cologne clung to them, and deep inside his brain something stirred. It made him jumpy; like there was an itch in there he simply couldn’t scratch.
ONE MONTH EARLIER
VLOG ENTRY #1
INT. BAR – BOOTH – NIGHT
Zach adjusts the camera on his laptop and leans back. He smiles and salutes.
ZACH
Greetings, friends, Romans, and countrymen! Lend me your ears! Yes, I know, I know. Long time no see, huh? Can you believe it’s been three whole years since I stopped vlogging about my thrilling life on a cruise ship and started vlogging about my boring life in Brooklyn? Plenty of you hung on with me through that transition, and I appreciated that loyalty. And how did I repay you? I disappeared for the past year! Sure, things here have been incredibly busy, but that’s no excuse for neglecting you, my loyal followers.
So, I’m here to catch you up on all the latest excitement going on in my new life here in the Big Apple! First…
He stretches his arms wide, indicating the booth he’s seated in, and the blue and green décor behind him.
My bar! Blue Flight! Yes, you heard it right. I, Zachariah Stephens, am officially part owner of this fine, and if I say so myself, cooler-than-cool establishment. Can you believe it? Everyone who’s known me my whole life can tell you that I’ve wanted to own a bar since I was five years old and swirled my first fake martini in a doll’s tea cup.
Blue Flight is an absolute dream come true. Oh, and get this
—
our apartment is just above it. I barely roll out of bed and I’m at work in the morning. My commute is a staircase. Envy me.
And it’s all thanks to my wonderful, amazing, and beautiful sister, Maddie, who provided me with a serious cash infusion in the form of a big, fat loan, making all of this…
He indicates the room again.
…possible! And, Maddie, if you ever see this,
mwah
! You’re the best! Thank you, thank you! I forgive you for outing me to Mom when I was twelve! All is forgiven!
Zach’s smile fades, and his gaze moves away from the camera.
And then there’s Leith. I’ve told you about him before, back when we started our unexpected little romance. Well, Leith has a championship boxing match tomorrow. It’s the most important title bout of his career. I’m excited for him, and I know he’s worked up too. But lately we seem to get into small fights over every little thing.
He crosses his arms over his chest.
Of course, Leith is anxious. Very anxious. And saying that he deals well with anxiety is like saying that I’m a virgin. So right now everything I do or say annoys him, and my attempts to help him are seen as nuisances rather than as the acts of kindness, support, and love they’re intended to be. I don’t know what to do for him when he gets like this. He can be such an ass.
He sighs and gathers himself.
Ah well, it doesn’t really matter. Leith knows that I love him, and that I want only good things for him, and I know that he loves me. Now all he has to do is defeat this meathead in the ring, and then things will go back to normal. When it comes to knocking out 160 pounds of muscle in the boxing ring, he’s a champion. When it comes to dealing with anxiety, he’s a bull in a china shop.
Zach shrugs and leans forward.
If this is the price I occasionally have to pay for the happiness our life together brings me, then it’s more than worth it. Most of the time, we’re the perfect couple, and we fit together brilliantly. If I weren’t part of us, I’d envy us. We are
that
good
—
LEITH (
off screen
)
Zach?
ZACH
Here!
LEITH
There you are. Are you talking to yourself? Should I be worried?
Leith leans into the booth and kisses Zach, cupping his hand on the back of Zach’s neck.
I couldn’t sleep. I kept thinking about how grumpy I was with you earlier. I’m sorry. I’m an ass.
ZACH
Okay.
LEITH
Okay? “Okay” you agree that I’m an ass?
ZACH
Yep. Absolutely. Of course, it takes one to know one. But, hey, scoot over here so the camera can get a good picture of your pretty face.
Zach moves over and Leith slides in close to him in the booth.
I’ve started up my YouTube channel again. I’m making a video blog about all the amazing things that have happened in the last year. Well, and about how you, Mr. Wenz, are sometimes a giant ass.
LEITH
And you’re doing it
now
? It’s almost midnight.
ZACH
It’s a good distraction from what an ass my boyfriend is being.
LEITH
Are you really filming right now? I’m wearing my pajamas.
ZACH
Boxers and a T-shirt. Oh yes, the viewers will be scandalized.
LEITH
Seriously Zach, I’m really sorry about earlier. I shouldn’t be such a dick to you. I know you’re just trying to help, and I appreciate it. I do.
ZACH
He turns to the camera, keeping his arm around Leith’s neck and shaking him a little.
See, my loves? He’s much too pretty and sweet to stay angry with for long.
LEITH
You’ve really been telling them about our fight?
ZACH
Don’t worry. You didn’t come off too badly. I’d already moved on to telling them that, truly, we’re the perfect couple.
LEITH
He looks straight at the camera.
Well, I don’t know about that, but it’s true that my boyfriend here likes to brag.
ZACH
I only tell the truth. They’ll just have to suffer the same soul-crushing envy that everyone else who knows us suffers from.
Leith scoffs as Zach chuckles and kisses him again. Leith cups his face and tilts his head, deepening the kiss. Zach breaks away.
ZACH
Okay, perhaps we should wrap this up. It’s only eight hours until my sweetie here has to be up and at ‘em to prepare for his boxing match.
LEITH
Seven.
ZACH
Seven? It’s later than I thought. We need to get your fuzzy head to bed. So, my loves
—
I’ll see you tomorrow! Or rather, you’ll see me!
LEITH
Tomorrow? You’re going to make this a regular thing?
ZACH
Yeah. It’s fun, and it’s good for me to get things off of my chest, don’t you think?
LEITH
Sure. Comment below if you think Zach is a dork.
He avoids Zach’s attempt to smack the back of his head.
ZACH
Until tomorrow!
Mwah
!
LEITH
Adios, Zach’s amigos.
The hospital garden was in full summer bloom. The roses were especially lush and vibrant, appearing ready to burst with delicious-smelling beauty. His psychiatrist, Dr. Thakur, suggested they take a walk together during their session to help Leith get some strength back. As they strolled, Leith was vaguely embarrassed that his stamina wasn’t even half as good his doctor’s. He had to pause and catch his breath more than once.
As he did, Leith took the opportunity to study Dr. Thakur’s now familiar laugh lines around his twinkling dark brown eyes, his smooth dark skin, and his pitch-black hair. He was slightly rotund, and that, along with his age, reminded Leith of his father.
But that was where the resemblance ended. Leith’s father had been fully German
—
with blond hair and blue eyes
—
and an alcoholic gambling addict, while Dr. Thakur was a successful, self-contained man who didn’t seem likely to bet on anything.
“I’ve been checking in with the physical therapists,” Dr. Thakur said in his mild Chicago accent. His strong hand supported Leith’s waist when he wavered on the path. “You’re making good progress, but we all believe getting outside more will be good for you. As long as the weather holds, I’d like you to walk out here every day.”
It wasn’t as though Leith had been confined to his room since he’d been moved to the rehabilitation facility. He was allowed free reign of the premises for the most part, so long as he alerted the nurses to his destination, but usually he didn’t go as far as the gardens. There were plenty of pretty nurses to talk to until he grew tired, and Leith would generally leave his flirtations to go back to his room well before he made it all the way to the door to the outside world.
But now he wondered why he hadn’t had more fortitude. Damn, it was good to see the blue sky and white clouds above. Leith always breathed deeper and easier out in the fresh air.
“How long until I’m released?” He wanted to go camping. Getting out into the woods had healed him as a kid, especially after his mother’s death. He wanted to lie back under the stars, and count them into the wee hours of the morning.
Dr. Thakur indicated a bench behind a large shrub and sheltered by an oak tree, and they sat. “Well, that depends. I hear you had a pretty big outburst over a hunk of clay in art therapy this morning.”
Leith crossed his arms over his chest and leaned back. He still felt weak from the walk, and he was definitely not interested in talking about his
feelings
again. “Yeah, so what? I was frustrated.”
“Obviously.”
“I couldn’t get it to do what I wanted.”
“So you threw it against the wall?”
Leith exhaled sharply and looked away. It was difficult to explain. He’d been staring at the clay and thinking about Zach for some reason. Thinking about the sweet Easter bread, and how, had the clay been a slightly different color, it would have looked a lot like the yeasty, thick dough that his mother had made. Then he’d thought about Zach’s eyes, and the memory of that small bird had come to him again.
Using the tongue depressors they’d handed out as molding tools, he’d tried to make the bird he saw in his mind’s eye. When the delicate wing he’d carefully scraped out of the hunk of clay suddenly buckled and broke, an avalanche released inside of him, and moments later he’d been brought down to the floor by several male nurses. He remembered throwing the clay, and he remembered turning over the table, but he didn’t know exactly why he’d reacted that way.
“I was angry,” Leith said, feeling sheepish. He didn’t meet his doctor’s eyes.
“Leith, we know that you want to leave rehabilitation. You’ve already made remarkable physical progress. Truly, we’d like you to be ready as well, but so long as you’re still having a difficult time managing your anger, it would be irresponsible for me to release you. Believe me, the outside world is going to be a lot harder for you to negotiate than an art therapy class.”
Leith exhaled, and just shook his head.
“The expectations and hopes of your friends and family are difficult enough for you to manage now, and you’re not with them every day. Before we give you the go-ahead, I want you to be more f comfortable with the people you’ll be living with. We don’t want another episode like today, or worse, like the first one.”
Leith closed his eyes, shuddering as he remembered. He’d just woken up, and though he later learned it wasn’t for the first time, it was the first time he could recall, and the first time he was coherent and able to speak. Arthur had been sitting by his hospital bed, looking thinner than ever and worn completely through.
“What happened?” Leith had asked, a sensation like bees buzzing rose up through his body as he looked around the room. “Where am I?” It didn’t look like the prison infirmary.
“You’re in the hospital,” Arthur answered. His voice was full of quiet affection, and he’d sat even closer, taking Leith’s hand in his own. “You should stay calm. I’ll get a nurse.”
“What happened?” Leith asked again.
Arthur had shook his head, and closed his eyes a moment, as though wishing it away. “There was a…mishap. In the ring.”