Authors: Charlene Zapata
Tags: #Mental Health, #love, #abuse, #Life Choices, #New adult, #friendship, #Tragedy
"Do you want something to drink?"
"Water is fine."
"I can do better than water. We have soda, juice and even milk."
"I happen to like water. It's great for your skin." He gives me a strange look like he just discovered an alien. What? It's not that crazy to like water, is it?
"Ok. Water it is."
"Now I want to see your room, Slick. Tit for tat as they say." He gives me a sly smile and starts heading down a narrow hallway. I see the bathroom to the right and another bedroom to the left. Then we come to a stop at the end of the hall.
"You ready for this?"
"Oh no. Is this where you hid all the trash and clutter?" I look at him with a mock look of horror. "Just let me in Slick." I can't believe it. His room is even cleaner than the rest of the house. It's small like mine but cozy. He doesn't have much but there is a nice size bed and a small desk in the corner. I walk over to the window and notice the view of the railroad tracks. You can see them clear as day from here. Interesting. Next I head to his desk where I notice several drawings. They seem to be landscape plans. I pick up the picture on top of the pile to examine it more closely.
"This is very good. Did you draw this?"
"Yes. I told you I want to expand my business. After you gave me so much encouragement I started drawing up plans for a few of my clients. I'm going to try to present it to them in hopes that they will use my ideas. What do you think?"
"Vincent, I think these are amazing. If you are capable of conveying even just a tenth of the beauty on this paper into someone's yard, I mean wow. I would hire you in a heartbeat."
"Really?" And there is that self-doubt again. I can hear it in his voice. I look through the rest of the papers strung out over the entire desk. This must have taken him hours. After I have combed over every detail in every drawing I move over to his bed. I sit down but immediately think I should get up. This feels really personal. But then Vince comes over and sits next to me. He is so close, I smell his incredible scent that I noticed the first day I met him in the grocery store. It's like my own personal potpourri. We start talking about anything and everything but keeping to the basics. I get more comfortable and end up with my back up against the wall, legs crossed in front of me, with a pillow behind my head. Vince seems comfortable too. He is laying on his side facing me with his elbow on the bed and his cheek resting on his hand. We talk about school, all the classes I'm taking, what I like best and what I hate. Who my friends are. How I got into swimming. I ask about his plans for his business and we brainstorm ideas on how to present his drawings to his clients. The next thing I know my phone is ringing with Amanda's ringtone.
"Hello?" I don't know why she would be calling me right now. Isn't she supposed to be on her date? Weird.
"Yeah, hello. Where are you? It's after eleven. I thought you were coming over?"
"OMG! I didn't even realize how late it was. I'm on my way now. I'll be there in ten minutes." I can't believe we have been sitting in his room talking for what, like three hours? It seems like we just got here. Vince hears my conversation with Amanda so he gets up to head to the door. As soon as I get off the phone I give him her address.
"I can't believe it got this late. Crap. Amanda is waiting for me. Sorry, I gotta go."
"I understand. So are you going to be with Amanda tomorrow before work? Will you still need a ride?" He is so freaking nice.
"Amanda has to work at her dad's shop tomorrow morning so I'm free if you want to hang out before I go into work." That makes him smile so big I think I can see all of his pearly white teeth. Which in turn makes me laugh.
"What's so funny?"
"Nothing. Nothing at all."
"Ok. Be ready by 9 am. I have someplace I want to take you."
"9 on a Saturday? Are you trying to kill me?"
"You don't like mornings?"
"Not even a little. But for you I will be up and ready to go. It's the least I can do since you have become my personal chauffer." I give him a little wink as we walk out the door.
Amanda is relentless once she discovers I spent the evening with Vince. It is question after question until my throat hurts. She finally gives up and lets me get some sleep. Of course I could have passed out 30 minutes ago if I hadn't mentioned that I would be spending tomorrow with him too. That brought on a whole other set of questions. I am so glad she has to be at the shop by 8:00. I would die from embarrassment at the questions she would ask Vince. If she's like this with me I can't imagine what she would put him through. She is so thrilled that I have a guy to hang out with but she doesn't understand how I can just be friends with him. I just can't go down that road again.
I absolutely loathe the morning. I can't believe I let some guy talk me into getting up this early on a Saturday. I'll teach him. I wait until the last possible minute to get up not bothering to shower. I do brush my teeth because let's face it, I'm not a cave woman. I pull my hair into a ponytail and pull on a pair of jean shorts with a white tank top. That's it. That's all the effort he is getting out of me this early in the damn morning. I get a text from him saying he's on his way. I grab my bag and head outside.
"Good morning!" Vincent says with the biggest smile on his cheery, bright face. Great. Another morning person. Why can't I escape these people! I grunt as I notice he is driving his truck and not the mustang.
"Why are you in your truck?"
"Because we need this type of vehicle for where I'm taking you." That wasn't at all mysterious.
"Whatever. Wake me when we get there." Vincent chuckles but leaves me alone. I climb into the truck and snuggle up against the door closing my eyes. I need more sleep.
Suddenly I'm jostled awake. I open my eyes to a field. A great big empty field. With lots of bumps. That's what woke me up in the first place. I don't see a road, not even a dirt one. In the distance I can see dozens of trees. "Where are we?"
"You will see soon enough. Sorry the rough road woke you up. I was just getting used to the snoring." I give him a look that means I am so not in the mood to joke around. It's too damn early for this. And road, what road? After another ten minutes he pulls over turning the truck off.
"Are you up for a little nature walk?"
"Really? This is what you decided was such a good idea on a Saturday morning? I know we don't know each other well yet but just to clue you in, taking a girl out to the middle of nowhere all alone, not cool."
"Stop being such a grump and get out of the truck. You won't be disappointed. I promise." I give him one last scowl, then climb down from the truck. We walk for about 20 minutes before I start to complain. After another 5 minutes, Vince finally stops.
"What I'm about to show you, it's private. You can't tell anyone we came here. Okay?" He turns to look me straight in the eye when he says this. He looks so serious I don't dare joke with him right now.
"Sure. I won't say anything. Promise." We walk another hundred feet or so when I hear water. It's not loud but a slow, trickling kind of water. And then I see it. It's a little creek nestled in the woods. All along the bank of the creek are the smoothest stones I have ever seen. My eyes climb up the bank to the most beautiful wild flowers growing as far as the eye can see. Patches of yellow, bright blue, and white with little bursts of a vibrant orange cover the ground. It takes my breath away. It's simply amazing. I calmly turn to say something to Vincent when I notice the expression on his face. He looks so nervous and unsure like he's afraid I won't like it here.
"Thank you so much for showing me this place. It's just...magical." Relief floods his features just as I see the tiniest smile.
"I'm glad you like it. We found this place about six years ago. My father used to bring me and my brother here to fish in the creek. But since my dad passed away my brother stopped coming. I guess it was too painful for him."
"I can understand that. But you still come?"
"Yeah. It reminds me of my dad. It makes me feel like we are still connected somehow."
"What happened to him?"
"He had a heart attack two years ago. Broke my mom's heart to lose him. But it was pretty quick. The doctor said he didn't suffer much. Like that's supposed to ease the pain of losing a loved one." I stood there for several minutes soaking up the view, getting lost in my own thoughts. Suddenly I found myself talking about my own father.
"My dad's dead too. Car accident when I was 6-years-old. I don't think there is anything in this entire world that can ease that kind of pain. I wish I could tell you that it gets better but it doesn't. There isn't a day that goes by that I don't miss that man." A single tear slides down my cheek and lands on one of the stones. I don't bother to wipe it away. I just don't care right now.
"Why does this have to happen? Why do we lose the people that are closest to us? It just doesn't seem fair. It makes me wonder what the purpose of all this is. I mean, is there even a God? Why would he take the people that mean the most to us away?" I turn to look into his eyes as he expresses his frustration and anger. I don't blame him. Not one bit. I've had years to question and second guess if God exists. To wonder why this happened to me but in the end I choose to be positive. To believe that everything in our life happens for a reason even if we don't know what that reason is.
"I can't tell you what to believe. That is your journey in life. To figure out what is important, what you want to have faith in. But I can tell you one thing I know for certain. God does exist. For me he is very real. I was in the car that day with my father. I have been over the accident report a thousand times. My father was killed on impact. I should have died that day, Vincent. I should have died in that car with my father. I shouldn't be standing here right now talking to you. I should be gone. But God saved me. I don't have it all figured out but I know I have a greater purpose on this earth. I just have to survive long enough to figure it out." I can't believe I just shared all of that with him. I never, and I mean never talk about the accident. For some reason it feels as though a weight has been lifted from my shoulders. I feel lighter. It felt good to talk about my life with someone else. We stand silent for a long time just breathing in all the wonderful aromas. The smell of the wildflowers mixed with the creek water is wonderful. It's one of my new favorite scents. Finally Vincent breaks the silence.
"Thank you for sharing. I'm sure that wasn't easy for you. You've given me a lot to think about. How did you get so wise?"
"Vincent, I've had eleven years to deal with losing my father. I have been through the entire grieving cycle more than once. I get where you are right now. It takes time to forgive, to see the bigger picture of why this happened. You may never know why you have to go through the rest of your life without your father. Maybe it will make you a better man. I don't know. Don't listen to me, I feel like I'm just rambling." He turns to face me with the most sincere look I have ever seen.
"Thank you. Thank you for making me feel better. Thank you for giving me so much to consider. I was headed down a path of destruction when my dad died. Losing him and watching my mother struggle is what pulled me out of that life. A life that was headed nowhere fast. The rumors you heard about me were probably true. I was a trouble maker. But I'm not that person anymore, Maggie. I don't ever want to be that person again." And I believe him.
I'm beyond astonished that he is sharing so openly with me. I feel so vulnerable, so raw out here in the middle of nowhere with a guy I barely know sharing such personal truths about our lives. Maybe it's this place. It makes me feel calm and peaceful, like I could stay here all day. Then again, maybe it's Vince. He makes me feel safe.
I offer him a small smile then head over to one of the larger rocks to sit down and enjoy the morning. Vince follows me over and sits next to me. We end up talking until my stomach starts growling so loudly you can hear it over the running creek water. Vincent laughs at me, then takes my hand to lead me back to the truck. The funny thing is, I don't pull my hand away from his. I still feel that bolt of electricity but there's something more. It feels warm, soothing and even protective in a way. I like it more than I should.
An hour later and we are back at his house. I only have a couple of hours before work. Vincent drags me inside and tells me to sit on the couch. I go grumpily to the plush leather sofa. The next thing I know the house is filled with this amazing smell.
"What is that?"
"My mom likes to cook for us on the weekend. She brought over some food yesterday while we were out. I hope you like homemade enchiladas."
"Are you serious? I love them! They smell incredible." I jump up and head into the kitchen. "Can I help with anything?"
"Can you get two plates down from that cabinet over there? And grab me a soda please."
"Sure thing boss."
"I like the sound of that. You can call me that anytime."
"Maybe I'll just stick with Slick. I wouldn't want you to get some kind of enormous ego." I laugh at my own ridiculous joke but when I stop I hear Vince laughing too. We eat lunch in silence mainly because I can't seem to shovel this delicious food in my mouth fast enough. Vince is trying so hard not to laugh at me but in his attempt to be modest he ends up snorting through his nose which makes him have a coughing fit. I start laughing at him so hard that I almost pee my pants!
"I gotta pee. Don't eat the rest of my food!" I run to the bathroom and close the door. This has been the best day ever. I look in the mirror and that's when I know I'm in trouble. I can see it in my eyes. Happiness. Suddenly my heart sinks to the floor as I start gasping for air. This is a terrible idea. What am I thinking getting involved with this guy? But I'm not getting "involved" we're just friends. Keep telling yourself that Maggie, as you fall deeper and deeper off the ledge.
Eventually I pull myself together, finish up in the bathroom and head back out to tell Vince I can't see him anymore. But just as I round the corner to the kitchen he holds up his hands while dropping my fork. He was totally just eating my food! I run over to the table to see half of my last enchilada gone. So I do what any sane person would do. I pick up my fork and stab him in the arm.