Something Like Summer (35 page)

Some hurried mental
exertion was necessary to keep from getting a boner. Looking away
from Tim didn’t help because he ended up looking at Jace. His was a
body that Ben knew well, since it had provided him hours of endless
pleasure. Seeing Jace nearly nude only put Ben more in the mood.
Allison was the only safe person to look at, an ironic truth
considering how stunning she looked in her bikini.

Music pumped from the
park’s loudspeakers, but otherwise the park appeared abandoned.
Occasionally they would pass another group of birthday guests, but
most waterslides were without lines. The lifeguards on duty yawned
in the sun, many only perking up when Allison came around. They
were at the third set of slides, blue covered tubes that twisted in
all directions, when Ben’s secret agent abandoned the
war.

“
You can’t leave me,” Ben
complained. “You’re supposed to be my chaperone!”

“
Just look at
him!”

Allison nodded in the
direction of a lifeguard who was casually flexing his ebony
muscles. “And what do you mean, chaperone? I thought I was just
running interference.”

“
You know what I mean,”
Ben said, tearing his eyes away from the lifeguard. “Are you sure
you want to hang around here when there’s a whole park to
explore?”

“
As tempting as the
prospect of spending the day with three gay guys is, I think I’ll
take my chances with tall, dark, and interested over
there.”

Down to three now, their
little party hit the wave pool next, followed by tubing around the
winding river before they headed back to the restaurant for some
food. Afterwards they debated whether the “wait thirty minutes
after eating” rule was an urban legend or not. In the end they
compromised by lounging in the artificial lagoon.

Unlike the rest of the
park, the lagoon’s waters were dark, the bottom lined with sand.
Half the water was ringed by a beach, the other by a jumble of
rocks coursing with waterfalls. Far from resembling any natural
landscape, the lagoon was still a pleasant place to cool
off.

The three men waded into
the water, diving into the usual antics of splashing and dunking.
Eventually Jace retreated to the beach to catch some sun while Tim
went to explore the rocks. Ben floated on his back, idly watching
the clouds drift across the azure sky. He was in danger of dozing
off when Tim called out to him.

“
Check it out! There’s a
cave behind this one.”

Ben chuckled to himself.
This was sure to make the evening news.
Tim Wyman, budding archeologist, discovered a previously
unknown cave in Splashtown today.
Ben
asked Jace if he was coming too, but his boyfriend didn’t respond,
meaning that he was probably sleeping behind those sunglasses. Ben
made a mental note to turn him over before he burned.

The central waterfall was
the strongest, and it was here that Tim stood, the water coursing
over him. He waited until Ben was near before holding an arm out,
redirecting the water and creating a makeshift entrance. Ben bowed
through, ending up in a small cave with an even smaller pool, the
water only reaching his waist.

“
You know this is where
everyone comes to pee,” Ben said.

“
Or to do other things,”
Tim grinned, joining him in the water.

“
They should put a hot tub
in here,” Ben replied, doing his best to ignore the come-on. “That
would be way cooler.”

“
I liked hearing you sing
today,” Tim said. “In the car. It was nice.”

“
Thanks.” Ben
flushed.

“
Sometimes at night, on
the very edge of sleep, I swear I could hear you singing.” Tim
paused and laughed. “That sounds cheesy, but it’s true. Never in a
million years did I think you’d be in my life again, that I really
would be able to hear the sound of your voice.”

Ben looked to the ceiling,
hoping to find some random detail to turn the conversation toward.
This was where he was supposed to recognize Tim’s intentions and
shoot him down, heading back out into the open where his boyfriend
was waiting. His brain knew this was the best course of action. His
body disagreed. His heart was just confused.

“
Do you still paint?” Ben
managed at last.

Tim remained silent until
Ben looked at him. Then he moved in close. Ben started to say
something, but Tim shook his head warningly, white tiger eyes
locked onto their prey.

Ben remained frozen in
place, his heart thudding furiously as Tim closed the gap between
them. He stopped, just inches away, close enough that Ben could
feel the heat of his skin. Tim reached up and touched a lock of
hair above Ben’s right ear. Then his fingers slid to the back of
his head, gently taking hold before pulling Ben in for a
kiss.

At first Ben didn’t
respond. The last part of him that still resisted wouldn’t allow
his lips to move. But it was too late. The rules had been broken,
trust had been betrayed. All that was left now was to enjoy it. He
kissed back, stepping forward so that their bodies were pressed
together. Their kissing worked into a frenzy, their hands grasping
at each other as their increasingly hard cocks rubbed together
through their swimsuits.

Then the breaking of the
waterfall’s steady rhythm stopped them both.

“
About done?” Jace asked
evenly.

Ben shoved Tim away so hard
he fell backward in the water. This left his bulge exposed, but it
was clear from Jace’s expression that he had seen enough
anyway.

“
I’m sorry,” Ben
apologized as Tim stood back up.

Jace didn’t look away from
Ben. Already his look of anger had faded to
disappointment.

“
Maybe you should wait for
us outside, Tim,” Jace suggested.

“
I’m so sorry,” Ben
sputtered once they were alone. “It just sort of happened. I don’t
know--”

“
It’s all
right.”

Ben couldn’t believe his
ears. “What?”

“
I said it’s all right,”
Jace repeated, sitting on the rocky shelf next to the entrance. “I
knew something like this would happen eventually, if it hadn’t
already.”

“
I didn’t do anything with
him before!” Ben said. “Just now, I promise.”

Jace shrugged, seemingly
unconcerned.

“
Aren’t you
angry?”

“
Not really. Old feelings
don’t just disappear overnight. It’s normal that you and Tim still
find each other attractive.”

“
That’s it?” Maybe it was
the hormones still coursing through his system, but Ben was
starting to feel angry enough for the both of them. He would have
been furious if he had caught Jace making out with someone. Ben
wanted Jace to tell him off—he had it coming. Ben had done
something wrong and now it was time for him to pay the price. Or
were Jace’s feelings for Ben not as strong as his own?

“
I wish you were pissed,”
Ben blurted. “At least then I could tell that you care.”

Jace looked confused. “I
care,” he said, his irritation rising as he stood. “I just thought
I’d give you the benefit of the doubt.”

“
What’s there to doubt?”
Ben demanded. “You saw everything. I did something stupid, and you
should hate me for it.”

“
I’d never hate you,” Jace
said solemnly.

Ben bit back tears. An
angry Jace would have been so much easier to deal with. Instead
Jace was hurt. Normally when he was unhappy, Ben would hold him and
kiss away his pain, a gesture that would now be tacky considering
where his lips had just been.

A shadow moved behind the
waterfall before Tim pushed through again.

“
Hey,” he said to Jace.
“It’s my fault. I grabbed him and started kissing him. He wasn’t
even kissing back. Really. Please don’t blame him.”

The apology might have been
effective if Tim wasn’t grinning while delivering it.

With the lightning fast
reflexes of a cobra, Jace decked Tim. The smacking noise was still
echoing throughout the cave when Tim fell back into the water. Jace
grabbed him after his head submerged and leaned him against a wall
until he recovered enough to stand on his own.

“
How’s that for angry?”
Jace said to Ben. “Come on, we’re going home.”

Ben risked only the
smallest glance at Tim as he followed Jace out of the cave. He
expected to see shame, humiliation, maybe even anger. Instead Tim’s
jaw was set with determination.

* * * * *

Hormones could impair
judgment, sometimes even more potently than drugs or alcohol. Ben
felt he was living proof of this. One act of impulse that had
lasted seconds now threatened to destroy years worth of love with
Jace. Who knew that a single kiss could be so expensive?

The rental car they were
cruising along in wasn’t free either, but Ben felt lucky to be a
passenger in it. Jace had insisted on walking to the dealership
alone, which was only down the road from Splashtown, but as he
began his hike Ben honestly thought that would be the last he’d
ever see of him. Alone in a near empty parking lot, he had little
else to do but replay the mistake he’d made over and over again.
When the rental car pulled up he had almost wept with
relief.

“
I’m sorry,” he mumbled
for what felt like the thousandth time. For once Jace didn’t
respond with his standard “It’s all right.” Maybe he had finally
decided that it wasn’t.

Jace shifted in his seat
and sighed. “I had a close call once.”

“
Close call?”

“
About six months ago. On
a flight to Boston. We had a real nervous flyer, a younger
guy
. I’m not
sure he was even eighteen,
but he was attractive. Very attractive.” Jace glanced over at Ben
with no malice in his eyes. “Anyway, he was one of those rare
people who have a genuine phobia of flying. He had never flown
before and had no idea of his own fear until we were in the air. I
had to sit with him the entire flight and talk him through it while
holding his hand.”

“
That’s not quite the
same,” Ben pointed out.

“
Let me finish. Once we
landed he suggested we have a drink together. I suspected he only
wanted someone old enough to buy him alcohol from the bar, but I
figured he had earned it and I was off work for the day,
so--”

“
Did something happen?”
Ben asked, wanting to hear the end of the story. The anticipation
was torture.

“
Almost,” Jace continued.
“Sexuality eventually became a topic, and even though I mentioned
you during the course of the evening, he still tried to kiss me
when we were saying goodbye. He was hot, and I won’t lie and say
that I didn’t want to, but I made my choice when I decided to be
with you.”

“
So you
didn’t?”

“
No. I didn’t.”

Ben sighed, feeling
relieved but now twice as guilty. Even the idea of Jace cheating
hurt him. How much pain had his infidelity caused Jace?

“
There’s a difference
though,” Jace continued. “You were once in love with Tim. You
probably still are to some extent. You two have a history, and that
complicates matters.”

“
I still shouldn’t have
kissed him.”

“
Get over it,” Jace
snapped. “What’s more important to me is what you’re going to do
now. You’re stuck with an old-fashioned guy. I like monogamy. I
don’t want to have a threesome or share you with anyone. So now you
need to decide if you can handle that or not.”

“
I think I can,” Ben
said.

“
Good.” Jace nodded. “The
next thing you have to figure out is what you’re going to do about
Tim. I’m not going to forbid you to see him. I’m not going to say
you can’t be his friend. I’m going to trust you now as much as I
did before. There’s no point in going on otherwise. But I want you
to ask yourself if you can resist doing something like this
again.”

The question weighed on his
mind the rest of the drive home. Was it possible to love two people
at the same time? Jace seemed to think so and Ben’s heart was in
agreement. Couldn’t Jace and Tim hit it off? They could all be in
love and pile into bed at night. Then again, the jealousy Ben felt
while Jace talked about his own close call made him wonder if he
could really handle such a scenario.

No sense in dwelling on
that fantasy, since Jace wasn’t willing. What mattered now was
whether Ben could get himself under control enough to just be
friends with Tim and nothing else. Tim’s strong pursuit wasn’t
helping, and he didn’t seem likely to back off, judging by the
determined expression on his face when they left the water park
cave. Even if he did, Ben knew himself well enough to know that he
would start chasing. Tim could never only be a friend, because
every time Ben looked at him, all he saw was his high school
sweetheart.

Choosing between Jace and
Tim wasn’t easy. Jace was kind, worldly, and loving. Tim was wild,
mysterious, and passionate. Both were sexy. But one had never given
up on Ben, even though he now had good reason to. Jace had stuck by
him over the years. Tim had not.