Save Me From Myself (19 page)

SB sighs, “Yeah, David may look just like our father, but he’s nothing like him.”

That piques my curiosity. “What do you mean?”

“Our father was much older than mom. So, he was very set in his ways when David came along. They fought a lot when I was growing up. Dad wanted David to go to Vandy like he did, and then work with him. David didn’t want to, and ended up applying and getting accepted to a college in North Carolina. He told our parents the night before he left. God, I cried for
days
when he and Jeremy left. He and Dad didn’t speak to each other until he came home for Christmas. Their relationship was really strained after that. They spent the entire time David was here that Christmas fighting. In fact, he ended up leaving Christmas day to go back to Charlotte because he said he didn’t want to ruin my holiday with the amount of yelling they were doing.”

Wow. I never would have pegged David as the type to fight with his father over what he wanted to do. But then, David is pretty focused, so I guess it makes sense that he would refuse to just blindly do whatever his dad wanted. I don’t say any of this though because I don’t want to interrupt SB and have her stop talking to me. This is information David would never willingly volunteer.

I breathe a sigh of relief when she continues, “He didn’t come back again after that. I was only 8 when he left, but I was really close to both him and Jeremy. Not having them around anymore was awful. He and Dad were a lot alike though, both stubborn and unwilling to compromise. I don’t know a lot of what he did while he was in Charlotte, because even though he sent me letters and called me, we weren’t as close as we were when he lived here. Plus, what college guy wants to tell his Elementary or Middle School sister all his activities?”

She stops talking, and I have to ask, “So, what happened? I mean, I know your parents passed away, but that’s all David told me.” I wish I could take back the words as soon as I say them. This isn’t fun Saturday morning conversation, but SarahBeth just looks at me before continuing with her tale.

“It was a stupid accident. Dad was an executive for a record company here in Nashville. The company had just bought out a smaller label in Atlanta, and Dad was sent to make sure everything went smoothly. Since it was their anniversary, he took mom with him, figuring they could have a romantic weekend before he had to be at the label on Monday. Mom was an interior designer, and she had an important deadline that Friday, so they left very late. I was staying at Livvie’s, and since they weren’t supposed to return until Monday, the plan was for me to go to school with Livvie, and mom would pick me up Monday afternoon.”

When she starts to speak again, her voice breaks, and I want to put my arms around her. I never should have brought this up, it wasn’t like I had to know. But, now that she’s telling the story, she doesn’t stop. “It started raining during the trip, and Dad was always a fast driver. He seemed to think that speed limits were for people other than him. From what the police told David, he took a curve too quickly and went off the road. They weren’t found immediately. David got the call really late Sunday night. Apparently Mom had listed his number under ‘ICE’ in her phone, she was always doing stuff like that. Always worried that something would happen. Anyway, when he got off the phone with whoever called him, he didn’t give me many details on that, he and Jeremy packed what they could and came home.”

By this point, we’ve moved to the sitting area at the top of the stairs. I didn’t realize when we started talking that it was going to be such a long conversation, but I’m definitely not stopping SarahBeth from talking to me. The more she tells me about David and the accident, the more in love with him I fall.

“I didn’t know anything had happened, so I went to school like I normally would have. David and Jeremy came straight to school when they got here, and told the principal what happened. I was brought down to the office, and David had to tell me that our parents were gone. With as hard as it was for me to hear, I know it had to be even worse for him to tell. I don’t remember much of the days after that. It’s all kind of a blur.” She shrugs, looking at me apologetically, and I get up and sit next to her, wrapping my arms around her thin shoulders before she starts talking again. “After the funeral, my grandparents all wanted me to come live with them, but they all lived far away. I didn’t want to leave, and since David didn’t want me to have to make any more changes, he decided he would move home and take care of me. He was only twenty six at the time, and had his own life back in Charlotte, but he didn’t even question giving it all up for me. I’ll never be able to thank him for that, especially after moving home cost him so much.”

The way she says the last part makes me wonder. I mean, there are the obvious things he would have lost, his job, and wherever he was living for starters. But, the look on her face, and the way her voice changes when she says that last part makes me think there’s more to it. When she notices the way I’m studying her though, she starts backtracking. “Anyway, I don’t know what I would have done without David and Jeremy.”

I don’t know what to say to her, so I just tell her, “I’m so sorry for your loss SB. Yours, and David’s. My mom and I don’t get along, but I don’t know what I’d do without her. I’m so sorry I brought this up.” I’m so close to tears, just talking to her about this. David is absolutely amazing. I mean, I knew that already, but everything I learn about him just proves it more.

“It’s okay, I don’t get to talk about them often. Everyone just pretty much acts like nothing ever happened. I guess they’re afraid to bring it up around us, but it will have been five years next month.”

“Still, I should’ve asked for a funny story, not something so sad.” I can’t help but feel guilty.

SarahBeth grins, “Oh, I know
plenty
of funny David stories. I even know a few that would embarrass the hell out of him!”

I grin back, “Well, then I think we need to spend more time together. I absolutely need to know embarrassing David stories. He seems a little too perfect!”

“Perfect? David?” SarahBeth laughs, “I could tell you things that would make you think he’s anything but!”

We laugh for a few minutes, which is a huge relief after the deep conversation from just a few minutes ago before SarahBeth pulls away. “We’d better get downstairs before David comes looking for you. He’ll think I chased you off. I’ve been known to do that in the past,” she says with a wink.

As we stand, I remember something. “I thought you were spending the night at Livvie’s?” That’s what she told me last night anyway. Jeez, I hope we weren’t noisy last night. I’ll never be able to look her in the eyes if she heard us.

SarahBeth tilts her head sideways before she responds, “I did. You do realize it’s after twelve, right?”

Oh. Well, no, actually I didn’t realize that. I shake my head, and she continues to stare at me. She lets me stew for a couple of minutes before bursting into laughter as she comes to slip her arm through mine. “Come on, L. Let’s go see what big brother’s cooking us for lunch!”

***

We reach the bottom of the stairs, and I can already smell whatever David’s cooking. Whatever it is, it smells fantastic and makes my stomach growl. SarahBeth is telling me all about last night at Livvie’s, and their plans for the rest of the weekend. My mind is still on the revelations from a few minutes ago, and I’ve pretty much tuned her out now that I know she didn’t hear anything last night. Hopefully she got back after this morning’s events too, otherwise I’ll never be able to show my face around here again.

“Uh, Lyric?” I stop when SarahBeth tugs on my arm. Looking back, I realize she obviously stopped a few steps before I did, and I try to remember what we were talking about.
 

I really have no idea, so I have no choice but to say sheepishly, “Sorry SB, I’m not sure where I was just now.”

She grins at me, her smile just as wicked as her brother’s can be. “Oh, I bet I know where your mind was. It was upstairs in my brother’s room.” Shuddering, she continues with, “Ewww!” just as we reach the kitchen.
 

David’s standing at the stove talking to Jeremy who’s sitting at the bar. He turns when he hears us come in and smiles, “Hi ladies.”

Before I get the chance to say anything, SarahBeth squeals, “JEREMY!” and darts across the room to hug him.

Folding his arms across his chest, David raises an eyebrow at his sister, “Jeremy gets that kind of welcome? When you saw me, you waved hello and asked where Lyric was.”

SarahBeth, snug in Jeremy’s embrace, just grins at her brother, “Well, Jeremy and Lyric are way more fun than you are. What do ya expect?”

At her words, Jeremy pinches her side making her yelp. “Be nice to your brother little bit.” SarahBeth bristles, but doesn’t say anything else.

I feel pretty awkward still standing in the doorway and start to walk over to the bar to take a seat next to Jeremy and SarahBeth. David, however, has other plans. When I walk past him towards the bar, he grabs me around the waist and pulls me into him.

“Where do you think you’re going?” he says into my ear.

I turn my head to look back him, “Um, to sit down?”

David smirks, “I don’t think so darlin'. I think you should stay right here.”

“How are you going to cook
and
keep an arm around me?” I like playful David! In fact, I’d do just about anything to keep this less serious version of him around a lot more.

“Oh darlin', I thought you’d already figured out how well I multi-task.” He smiles widely at me, flashing his dimples, while my face flames.

“David!” SarahBeth exclaims, “Stop embarrassing her! You’re horrible.”

He just shakes his head like we’re all crazy and turns his attention back to stove to finish making lunch.

David doesn’t let me leave his side until lunch is ready and it’s time to sit and eat. When we all take seats at the small table off to the side in the breakfast nook, Jeremy quickly draws David into a conversation about the renovations that they are planning for the bar. SarahBeth and I are left to talk to each other, and she tells me about a graphic design project she’s working on for school.

Looking around the table, you can tell that these three are a family. Much more of a family than mine has ever been. It doesn’t matter if I was at my mom’s house in Manhattan, or my dad’s in Atlanta, I never really felt like I was at home. Not the way I do here with three people I don’t know that well. The only time we ever sit down for dinner at my mom’s is if she’s having a dinner party, and even then we have to be on our best behavior. My dad was always more the eat dinner in front of the TV type. There was always some sport or show on that he wanted to watch that was more important that talking to us.

I can’t help but wonder how different my life would have been if either half of my family had been more like these three.

When lunch is finished, SarahBeth heads back up to her room to work on something for school, and Jeremy says he’s going to work on the plans for the bar changes, leaving us alone again. We make our way into the den and David sits on the couch pulling me onto his lap.

I’m trying to figure out how to bring up the conversation SarahBeth and I had without making David mad. I don’t want him to think I was pumping his sister for information about him, but I want to get to know him better. I’m worrying so much about trying to start a conversation that I jump when he pulls the finger I’ve been chewing the nail on out of my mouth. When I look at him, he’s studying me with his brows furrowed. “What’s wrong, darlin'?”

I just shake my head, not really wanting to tell him what SarahBeth and I talked about. Thankfully, David is considerate enough to not badger me about what’s bothering me, even though I know that not knowing has to be bugging him. We continue to sit in silence, me tense on his lap with his arms wrapped loosely around me.

Finally, I can’t take the quiet anymore and I blurt out, “I talked to your sister this morning.” I say it so fast that I’m not even sure he can understand what I’m saying.

Obviously he does because I hear a low chuckle, then, “Is that what you’ve been stressing about so hard? I’m glad you and SB are getting along.” Then, turning me so that our eyes meet, he continues, “Did you think I thought you were snooping with how long you two were gone?” I shake my head, and he looks at me like he’s not sure he believes me before saying, “Even if you had been, I wouldn’t have minded darlin'.”

Oh, if only it were that simple. “No, I know you wouldn’t have. It’s just,” I stop and take a deep breath before quickly saying, “She told me about the accident.”
 

At my words, David stiffens, “You asked her about the accident?”

Crap
! “I…I…I…” I stutter, because his reaction has me really worried now. “I didn’t intend to! I was just looking at all the pictures in the hallway and I made the comment that you look a lot like your dad. SarahBeth said something back, and then it just kind of happened.”

David doesn’t say anything for a minute, then looks at me like he’s trying to figure out what he wants to say. When he opens his mouth to speak, it’s my turn to tense up. I hope I haven’t ruined what has been a pretty perfect day. “Lyric why didn’t you just ask me? I would have told you anything you wanted to know. You didn’t have to quiz my sister.” He sounds more confused than anything else, and I can’t help my sigh of relief.