Save Me From Myself (28 page)

David just told me he
loves
me! Just me, even when I’m neurotic, self-conscious, and self-destructive. He gets me in a way no one else ever has, not even Aria or Anna. He understands exactly what I need, when I need it, and he gives it to me. Finding someone like him is an absolute miracle, and I don’t ever want to let him go.

Pulling away from him slightly, I look into his now frowning face and have to grin. “David?”

“Yeah darlin'?” His voice in unsure, and I know it’s because I pushed him away from me. That’s when I realize that he’s just as out of his depth as I am right now.

Suddenly feeling shy, I bite my lip and look away. David’s arms are still wrapped loosely around me, but he moves one so that he can move my gaze back to his. He looks at me quizzically before saying, “Lyric, you can ask me anything. You know that right?”

Nodding, I take a deep breath, “I…just…never mind.” Why is it so hard to ask him this? By now, we’ve had sex enough times that I should be comfortable initiating it with him. It’s been more amazing with him each time, but David’s just told me he loves me and I want to be as close to him as possible.

When he continues to just stare into my eyes, saying nothing, although by the way the corner of his mouth has turned up, I’m almost certain he knows what I’m trying to say. He just wants me to be the one to say it. I take a deep breath in an attempt to calm my nerves before blurting out, “Will you make love to me?” Once the words are out, I’m mortified, but when David says nothing, I look up at him finally. His eyes are blazing gold, and the desire I see in them makes my heart speed up.

“Oh darlin', we’ve been doing that for a while now,” he replies with a salacious grin. It feels like I blush all the way to my toes, and he chuckles before cupping both of my cheeks in his gentle hands. He lifts my face closer to his as he brings his mouth down to mine. Just before our lips meet, he whispers, “I’ll never get enough of you.” At his words, I melt.

***

As his lips devour mine, David turns me so that I’m leaning against the desk instead of him, and his hands quickly start caressing my body. When his lips break apart from mine and he moves them towards my neck, I have a brief moment of lucidity. “David, the door. Is it locked?” I’m practically panting, the thought that anyone could come in and catch us both terrifies and arouses me.

David growls against my neck, “I’m pretty sure Jeremy locked it.”

“Pretty sure?” I ask, pulling away from him.

“Fuck,” he says in a low voice before leaving me to check. When he turns to walk back to me, he has a sheepish look on his face. “Well, it’s locked now at least” he tells me when he’s standing in front of me once more.

I roll my eyes, “Good thing you checked then, huh?”

The corner of his mouth lifts, showing off his dimple, as he says, “I love your smart mouth.”
 

His small smile widens, turning lascivious as he grips the hem of my shirt before pulling it over my head. Then, he inhales sharply when he sees my new emerald green bra, quickly sliding his hand up my back to unclasp it. He steps back, staring at my bare upper body which causes my nipples to tighten almost painfully under his scrutiny. I love the way he looks at me. His look says that I’m the most attractive thing he’s ever seen, that he wants me more than he’s ever wanted anyone else. It gives me a confidence that no one else ever has.

Keeping my eyes on his, I move my hands to the side of my flat front black pants to unzip the hidden zipper before peeling my pants down my thighs. He watches the movement with his bottom lip caught between his teeth. I step out of my shoes, and hook my thumbs in my matching emerald green panties when he says gruffly, “Don’t.”

Letting go of my panties, I look at him questioningly. He wants me to leave my panties on?
Why
? Before I can say anything, his body is flush against his again and he places his index finger on my lips, “Turn around darlin'. Hands on the desk.” I don’t even have to think about it, I comply immediately.

Putting an arm around my waist, he pulls my body so that my behind is sticking out and I’m forced to lean over to keep my hands in place. Then, he leans over me. “Don’t move,” he whispers in my ear. “No matter what.”

Goosebumps break out all over my body. I
really
like forceful David. He’s always a little alpha male, but he’s never been like this. It’s like us actually saying the words “I love you” has freed him to be who he really is.

He straightens, and I have no idea where he is. I’m facing the wall in his office, and he’s somewhere behind me. He’s no longer touching me, and the not knowing is making my heart race and my breathing pick up. I can hear what I think is him removing his clothes, and I close my eyes. I’m wound so tightly that when I feel his hands on my hips, I jump. David chuckles, and then he runs his finger up the center of my panties. I know they have to be soaking wet, but I’m so far beyond the point where I could be embarrassed that I don’t even care. I shiver lightly as he tugs my panties down, tapping each leg to indicate that I should lift it and he removes them.

I’m now completely bare, bent over his desk, unable to see his face or anything he’s doing behind me. After my pants are off, he runs a hand up each leg, gently massaging the muscles in my calves, then my thighs. I’m so thoroughly relaxed that I jolt forwards when one of his fingers slides inside me. David pulls me back into position, sliding first one than two fingers inside me, causing me to moan much more loudly than I probably should. It doesn’t take much for my hips to start moving back into his fingers, and I can hear his breathing become heavier. He suddenly removes his fingers from me, and I whimper, but then his mouth replaces his fingers and I have to grip the desk in order to stay upright.

“Oh David,” I moan breathily when his tongue mimics the movements his fingers were making only moments ago. Then, he alternates between thrusting his tongue inside me, and circling my sensitive clit each time I get close to an orgasm, keeping me constantly on the edge. “Please, David. I need you inside me,” I beg, unable to take any more of his teasing.

David laughs lightly, but it’s not a warm laugh. It sounds positively evil, and I shudder. I tense, but then feel his hand caress the small of my back as he leans over, telling me, “Oh darlin', I love it when you beg for me.”

I exhale a shaky breath, but my next inhale is cut off when the palm of his hand smacks down on my ass. I jump and even though he doesn’t smack me hard, it stings, but then it becomes a pleasurable pain. I’ve never been spanked before, and I can’t quite decide if I like it. Before I can make a decision, he smacks my other cheek before slamming into me. I let out a small scream, he feels even bigger in this position, and he isn’t being gentle at all. He grips my hips in both hands, pulling me into him as he slams into me again and again. He thrusts inside me only a couple of times before I explode around him. I’m almost afraid I’m going to black out from the strength of it. In fact, my vision actually dims around the edges as I struggle for breath.

The force of his thrusts never falters, and when I clench around him a second time, David’s breath hisses out as he murmurs, “Fuck yes darlin'.” He pushes deep one final time before releasing into me. When he pulls out, he collapses into the chair closest to him, pulling me with him so that I wind up on his lap.

David runs his hand through my hair, gently tucking it behind my ears. I smile shyly up at him, but my smile drops when I see the concerned way he’s looking at me. “Are you okay, darlin'? I don’t know what came over me just now.”

Ah, he’s worried I’m going to be upset with him. I feel my cheeks heat as I shake my head, “I’m more than okay! In fact, I don’t think I could
be
more okay right now.”

“Good,” he says, pulling me closer. I snuggle into him, my head on his shoulder and one hand on his chest. We stay like this for a while, both too comfortable to move while his free hand travels up and down first my back, then my arm. I doze until David finally pushes me into a standing position to help me get dressed. Then, he sends me out to get us food before we spend the remainder of the afternoon in his office, him doing things for the bar and me working on this week’s review.

It’s been almost a week since I caught SarahBeth and Jeremy in the bathroom and told David I’m in love with him, things have gotten extremely tense. SarahBeth and I are studiously ignoring and avoiding each other, although Jeremy and I still don’t talk unless we have to. Not that that part is any different. I know David is wondering what’s up with me and his sister, I’ve caught him looking at us curiously when we’re in the same room because we talk around instead of to each other.

When I got home from David’s that weekend, the only thing I wanted to do was talk to Anna about everything. She doesn’t pull any punches, and I needed honest advice.

“So let me get this straight,” she begins, settling further into the couch like she knows she’s going to be here for a while. “You walked into the bathroom, caught SB sucking face with her brother’s best friend, and you didn’t go right out and tell him? Why the hell not?”

“I wasn’t sure what to say!” I start. This conversation is already not going the way I thought it was going to. I was hoping she would immediately take my side, and tell me I was right not to say anything. Doesn’t look like it’s going to go that way.

Anna looks at me skeptically, “It’s not that hard L. You walk out of the bathroom and say, hey, honey, I saw your sister and your bestie going at it in the bathroom. Just thought you should know!”

I have to roll my eyes at the idea that David would ever refer to Jeremy as his “bestie”. If I wasn’t so stressed out, the idea would probably make me laugh. As it is, it’s only mildly amusing. “Ah, but Anna, you don’t know what happened the next morning when I finally talked to SarahBeth.”

Anna points an accusing finger at me, “That’s another thing! What the hell Lyr? Why didn’t you interrupt them and ask what the hell they were thinking?”

Throwing my hands up beside my head I yell, “I don’t know Anna! I was in shock!”

“Okay, I’ll give you that one,” Anna nods, “but still, you should have told him right away.”

“Yeah, well, I probably would have, except the next morning, SarahBeth threatened to tell David that she hated me if I told him what I saw. I don’t want to lose him Anna.” I know that I sound defeated, but honestly, I
feel
defeated. There’s no way for this to end well. Not for any of us.

That last sentence pushes Anna over the edge. “She said
WHAT
?! That little bitch. I’m going to kill her!” Her voice gets louder on each word, and by the time she stops talking, I’m cringing from the noise level.
 

She tries to walk past me, but I grab her arm, “Where are you going?”

“I told you, I’m going to kill that little girl,” she all but growls, jerking her arm out of my grasp and heading for her room. Having no choice but to follow her, I take off after her.

“Anna, wait!” I call, but she ignores me. By the time I make it to her room she’s worked herself into a completely pissed off state. Stepping into the doorway, I block her way out of the room.

“Move out of the way Lyric. If you’re not going to stand up for yourself, I’m damn sure going to do it for you.” Anna’s practically vibrating with rage, and I worry a little that she’s not being dramatic when she says she’s going to kill SarahBeth.

Gripping her arms, I say vehemently, “You can’t go talk to her. She needs to be the one to tell David, not me. It’s not my place. This is between the three of them, it doesn’t even involve me.”

“You’re an idiot Lyric if you think for even a second that this doesn’t involve you,” Anna scoffs. “You
saw
them. What do you think’s going to happen when David does find out, whether it’s because she tells them, or he walks in on something like you did? She’s going to throw you right under the bus and tell him you knew the whole time. Then, you’re going to be in the exact same situation. He’s told you before, the one thing he can’t deal with is lying.”

“But, I’m not lying to him!” I cry.

Anna pokes me in the chest, much like I did to Jeremy Saturday afternoon, “Omissions are still lies, L. You know that better than just about anyone. Think about it, what would you have done if after you caught Matt and Kimberly, you found out that Aria knew and never told you? How betrayed would you feel?”

Somewhere in the back of my head I know she’s right, but I
really
don’t want to admit it. “That’s a completely different situation Anna. Aria is my sister, she’s supposed to have my back.”

Anna takes a step back, raising a single perfectly sculpted eyebrow as she says, “The situation isn’t all that different. You’re his girlfriend and the girl he said I love you to just the other day. He said that after you saw what you did, and you didn’t tell him. That might be a worse betrayal than his best friend boinking his sister.”

Walking over to the bed, I sit down heavily putting my head in my hands. She’s absolutely right. I’ve completely betrayed David. “How do I make it better though? I already told him I know nothing, if I say something now, I’m still admitting to lying to him. It will just be compounded by the fact that she’s going to tell him she hates me if I tell him now. What am I supposed to do?” My voice breaks, and I know the tears aren’t far behind.