“I no longer have a boyfriend.” Jake smacked himself in the head. “Probably should have led with that, huh?”
Levi still stood there silently, the bottle of bubbly dangling from one hand and the container and keys in the other.
“I’m totally screwing this up, I am aware of that.” Jake sighed.
Wiping his forehead with the back of his hand, Jake noted he felt warm and potentially sweaty, which he feared wasn’t a good look for him in this precise moment of desperation. Unfortunately, none of that could be helped as all the things he’d wanted to say, the speech he’d gone over and over during the cab ride to Levi’s loft had all evaporated from his brain the instant he’d looked into Levi’s eyes.
Now he was lost.
“For the love of God, man, shut the damn door and get over here so I can kiss you,” Jake demanded.
Levi bent down, placing the bottle onto the floor before shutting the door. He didn’t move otherwise, though, finally opening his mouth to presumably ask a question.
“Earlier today, before the party,” Jake blurted out, guessing he was going to ask when Jake and Victor had split. “Just after running into you in the hallway at the hotel.”
Levi’s mouth closed, only to open once again.
“Yes, I understand and I even agree that coming here on the same day that I split with my ex is pretty tasteless. I’m not the least bit happy with myself for doing it, but frankly, in spite of all the reasons why I should stay away, I couldn’t fathom any reality where I didn’t come over here and fuck you three ways to Sunday.”
This time Levi’s mouth didn’t close, just sort of hung open from what Jake assumed to be shock.
“All I want for Christmas is you, Levi. All of you, body and soul and I can’t fucking rest until I have you, so manners be damned, I’m here. I may quite literally lose my ever-loving mind if I’m forced to wait any longer, so help me, Levi, do not ask me to.”
He noticed Levi appeared to be having some difficulty breathing. However, that was the only change in his posture since shutting the door. Jake was unsure where heavy breathing landed on the ‘take me now, lover’ barometer.
“So you’re no longer with…”
Jake shook his head indicating he was not, after Levi trailed off, apparently unable to finish his question. Finally, after several more uncomfortable seconds of silence went by, Jake lifted his hand and crooked his finger for Levi to come to him.
Levi blinked twice before finally doing as instructed, detouring into the kitchen long enough to deposit the container and the set of keys onto the island.
Jake followed him into the living room and they each stood there staring into one another’s eyes for several moments. Jake began to fear his chest might explode from the pressure of anticipation which had been building between the two of them for months. As desperately as he needed to kiss Levi, Jake wanted to memorize every detail of this moment first, in the unlikely event this ended up being the only kiss he managed to get.
Levi looked… terrified.
Not exactly Jake’s expression of preference for the man he was about to kiss, but if he were completely honest with himself, he was scared too. The fear was a distant second to his desire, but it was still there.
How could it not be?
From the second they’d met, their relationship had been less than conventional—a courtship which had come with nothing but restraints. There’d been all this build-up, so much drama, the ache to be with one another combined with the fact they couldn’t go there—an indelicate push and pull. They had simultaneously been some of the best and worst months Jake had ever experienced. But now, the storm clouds had dissipated and the rough waters had begun to calm—and there was Levi standing before him, so beautiful and vulnerable, looking every bit as needy as Jake undoubtedly did. Yet they each stood there, silently suffering the after-effects of too many months filled with trepidation.
One realization which came over Jake, outweighing all the doubts and the unending noise inside his own head: he would gladly spend the remainder of his days standing exactly where he now was, staring into Levi’s eyes, lost in the promise he might never be separated from him ever again.
“God, you’re beautiful,” he muttered.
“Jake—”
He cut Levi off before he had a chance to finish that sentence by finally doing what he’d come there to do.
The instant their lips came together it was as if everything else stopped.
The world outside of the apartment ceased to exist.
The air became perfectly still and there was only Levi’s mouth covering his own. When he opened his mouth, allowing Jake inside—that’s when everything began spinning. The taste of Levi was beyond anything Jake had ever imagined and he never wanted this first moment of discovery to end.
Unable to get his bearings, Jake thought perhaps they’d begun to levitate; hovering just off the floor because he no longer had any feeling in his legs or arms. There was nothing but the taste of Levi Goode.
When Levi’s tongue began fighting for control as their passion for one another deepened, it finally dawned on Jake that in spite of not being able to feel them, he did have hands in addition to a mouth.
On top of that, these hands of his were allowed to touch and twist and rub and explore.
Groaning softly as Jake slipped his arms around Levi’s waist, Levi reciprocated and they clung to one another as they continued to kiss desperately—teeth scraping and nibbling.
When Levi began gently biting and sucking on Jake’s lower lip, Jake felt himself smiling.
“My God,” Jake whispered between kisses, until Levi stopped, pulling back slightly.
Levi stared at him once again, breathing heavily and Jake nodded, watching as Levi began unbuttoning his tuxedo shirt, as if desperate to reach inside and feel skin against skin.
It took mere seconds for Jake to get Levi out of his T-shirt and boxers. Once he had him naked, Jake decided it would be his new mission in life to keep Levi naked as often as humanly possible. He wasn’t ripped, but Levi was lean and his tanned, toned skin practically glistened in the apartment’s low lighting.
Jake bit his lip, feeling Levi twist one of his nipples and they started kissing again.
He was punch-drunk from the powerful effect his mouth had over Levi’s body. Each tweak of a nipple and heated breath across the man’s neck elicited a fevered whimper, a groan of consent or a plea for Jake to take more—to push further. Jake intended to take him places no other man ever had before—knowing that only he could because no one had ever loved Levi the way he did.
Levi’s erection was poking into Jake’s pelvis and he dropped to his knees, cussing under his breath from the pain shooting up his leg from the hard wood floors. Jake briefly examined the thick, veined shaft before taking Levi into his mouth, sucking his cock all the way down to the root. Levi gasped, his left hand digging into the shoulder pad of Jake’s tuxedo jacket. Jake heard Levi moan, his free hand scrambling to get hold of his other shoulder, struggling to stay upright as his hips instinctively thrust forward.
Jake sucked and licked his way up and down the shaft, tasting Levi’s precum in the back of his throat. It was about the same time Levi began offering a multitude of verbal encouragements, occasionally digressing into utter nonsense. Jake relished each and every sound that came from Levi. He began slowly feeling his way around to Levi’s ass when the man declared he was going to shoot.
He swallowed each burst, able to feel Levi’s legs shaking during his orgasm, straining to keep himself upright.
Moments later, Levi fell to his knees and Jake kissed him, not giving Levi anytime to catch his breath. As Levi began helping him the rest of the way out his clothes, Jake understood Levi was ready to give himself over to Jake. Whatever else happened in the days to come, Levi was going to be his, and Jake would forever belong to Levi. In spite of the fact it felt dangerous to believe it, after everything they’d been through, Jake was unable to imagine any other future could exist.
* * * *
Levi rolled over onto his back, smiling as he struggled to get his wind back. Jake was lying next to him in the bed, in an equally exhaustive state as he finished wiping their combined orgasms off his stomach and chest. He’d never installed curtains or blinds because he loved all the natural light from the two large windows. But now, Levi could see the pre-dawn sky outside the bedroom windows was still dark but had begun to get a bit lighter, that first hint that daylight was on its way. Saturday morning would soon come rushing upon them, despite Levi’s pleas for time to stand still so he could relish these moments with Jake a little longer.
It felt as if the universe surely owed the two of them that much.
The large shaft of light spilling across the bed from the hallway was the only illumination in the bedroom, which was as sparsely decorated as the rest of the loft. The only furniture was the king-sized bed, propped up off the floor with a Hollywood frame and the single bedside table that Levi had picked up on a whim as he passed by a second-hand store the year before.
Jake was laughing as his chest continued heaving up and down. “That was amazing.”
“You do
that
really well,” Levi said, admiring Jake’s sweaty body all sprawled out before him. “So beautiful.”
Jake turned his head, reaching over to gently caress Levi’s cheek as a thank you for the compliment.
They stared at one another in silence for several minutes and Levi marveled over the fact the emptiness he’d been carrying around for weeks was now gone—like an apparition that had evaporated before his very eyes.
“I’m not sure if I can make you understand, Levi, not sure I actually understand it myself, but being with you now, here… like this—I feel whole for the first time in my life.”
Levi ran his fingers through Jake’s hair marveling over the fact he’d just been thinking exactly the same thing. “Jake—”
He reached up, placing a finger over Levi’s lips preventing him from saying anything else, only removing his finger long enough to kiss Levi softly. “I need to tell you this while I’m still able to form a coherent thought.”
Levi nodded, laughing softly, knowing that despite the fact they appeared to be momentarily all-sexed-out, it wouldn’t take more than an otherwise innocent caress or a well-intended soft, sweet kiss that went on a millisecond too long to easily set them off on another dizzying haze filled with hardness and heat.
“It’s strange because I never even understood anything was missing until I met you. Just blindly went about my day, never knowing that you were out there in the world, patiently waiting for me to come along and find you.”
Levi wanted to blurt out that he hadn’t been waiting all that patiently, but decided to keep that admission to himself for now.
“I don’t want to waste any more time, Levi—don’t want another second to pass us by, waiting for you and I to start our new lives together.”
“Wait… are you—”
“Trying my damndest to prove you wrong,” Jake said, rolling on top of him, pinning Levi to the bed. “That there are some very special instances when the idea and the act actually do occur simultaneously. That some loves are so rare and all-consuming that nothing and no one can prepare you for the life-altering effect they have on you.”
Jake kissed Levi, softy, sensuously, before pulling back and staring into Levi’s eyes. Neither of them said anything for a moment, just laid there, getting lost in one another with only the sound of the rain pelting the roof above them.
“Marry me, Levi Goode?” Jake finally asked. “Spend all the rest of your days with me, starting with today?”
“Wow,” Levi finally said.
Jake smiled, looking very cocky. “You’re surprised by the fact you’re gonna say yes, aren’t you?”
“Um… yeah, actually.” Levi said, cocking his head to the side, not completely comfortable with the fact Jake seemed to know what he was going to say before he said it. “I will marry you, Jake Freeman. I’ll marry you today, next week, next year. You name the time and place and I’ll be there—because I love you.”
Jake frowned. “Well, shit. I can’t believe I asked you to marry me before I told you I loved you.”
Levi chuckled, kissing Jake’s chin. “I’m giving you a pass this time as I believe the
I-love-you
is pretty much implied with the proposal.”
Jake grinned, shoving his face into the crook of Levi’s neck, whispering “I love you” into his ear before nibbling on his ear lobe. Levi grinned, groaning seductively as Jake followed up his declaration by whispering not-so-sweet nothings into his ear.
“You are bad man, Mr. Freeman.” Levi bit down on his lip when Jake tweaked a nipple with the tip of his tongue. “Who taught you to talk like that, anyway?”
Jake ran his hands down Levi’s torso, fingers pressing firmly into his skin as they each began grinding into one another. “I want every part of you, all to myself. I want to drown in you, Levi, be inside you with my tongue…” Jake began working his way down, kissing and sucking, “…inside you with my fingers…” he added, licking the head of Levi’s dick, “…with my cock.”
Levi gasped, feeling Jake’s fingers pressing into him. They weren’t lubed and Levi was a bit sore from their previous shenanigans so there was some discomfort—which was apparently of little consequence to his own, now rock hard erection.