Chasing Rainbows (27 page)

Whoever had named the complex obviously had a sick sense of humor. I drove around the numerous run-down apartment buildings, navigating pot holes, until finally, I pulled up in front of the building where Devon and Jake lived. I glanced around the lot searching for Jake's truck but didn't see it anywhere. Hell, he was probably still at the garage.

I took a deep breath, put the car in reverse and headed back the way I'd come. Relief coursed through me. I wanted to see him, but I feared his reaction. I pulled out onto the main road taking a right and drove farther out of town.

It was a couple miles to Devon's garage, which was an old deserted gas station that his uncle had once run. Devon had converted it into a chop shop with Jake's help. Of course, Devon's chop shop was legal. They dismantled, reassembled and created one–of-a kind accessories, and customized trucks and cars. The building was solid, but desperately in need of a good coat of paint and some minor repairs. Since it was less than a mile away from a small shopping center, which consisted of a hometown grocery store, a Walmart and a Subway, it was in a good location.

The turn was right up ahead so I slowed down using my signal and turned, pulling up to the garage. Jake's Sonoma was parked outside. Panic set in as I pulled in beside of his truck. My heart was beating like crazy and I was sweating. I slid the keys from the ignition, glancing into the rearview mirror and tried to force myself to smile but I couldn't. My facial muscles were frozen in place. I was terrified.

Opening the door, I walked past the double doors of the garage bay. Through the dingy glass windows, I could see the bright glaring arc from a welder. Jake was working. I stepped through the opened door coming into what use to be the main office. Devon had placed a ratty couch inside. It was sitting against the far wall. There were also a couple of faded plastic lawn chairs for seating. The coffee table had so many nicks and bangs it was impossible to tell where one began and the other ended. Discarded fast food wrappers lay scattered across the table's top along with a few empty beer bottles and soda cans while ironically, an empty waste bin sat right beside the table.

I sighed, stepped around one of the plastic chairs, and walked toward the back where an opened door would lead me into the garage. A bumper was lying on the concrete floor beside of an older model Ford pickup truck that Devon and Jake had obviously been working on. At the back of the room, a door was standing open allowing fresh air to enter the room. It was stuffy and hot inside. The air smelled of a mixture of sulfur and grease.

Jake stood with his back to me, and I watched his biceps flex as he reached up to remove the hooded shield that protected his eyes from the bright glare while he was welding.

He wore a pair of faded jeans and a sleeveless shirt. A fine sheen of sweat coated his tanned skin. His blondish brown hair was damp and dark and lay flat against his head. He placed the shield on a nearby table then turned to face me. If he was surprised, it didn't show. I forgot to breathe as I stared into his eyes. I'd missed him. I just didn't realize how much until now.

"What are you doing here, Addie?" he asked, the sound of his voice sending chills racing down my spine. The familiar way he said my name, and the memory of the way he used to look at me as though he never wanted me to leave his sight sent a pang shooting through my heart. I wished more than anything he'd look at me like that right now, instead of eyeing me with disinterest. It crushed me and I worried if just maybe, Brandon hadn't been completely truthful about his encounter with Jake. Maybe, Jake had only been trying to be polite when he'd asked about me earlier. "If you're looking for Kara, she isn't here," he said.

His handsome face was void of emotion. He was so cold. Even after all we'd shared, he was acting as if I were nothing more than a casual acquaintance. I watched him as he picked up the container of GOJO from the table and squirted a huge glob of it into his hand. I was mesmerized by the sight of his broad palms sliding against one another. It made me realize how much I'd missed his touch against my skin. I wished I could read his mind and know what he was thinking. I pressed a trembling hand against my stomach taking a deep breath and silently reminded myself to be brave.

"I'm not here for Kara," I said, watching him.

"Well, Devon's not here either," he said with a disinterested shrug. Then he strode to the opened door in the back and stepped outside. He wasn't going to make this easy for me. I followed after him, my nervousness forgotten. He was making me mad.

A rock wall stretched up the side of the mountain completely enclosing the area at the back of the garage. Grass had grown through the gravel of the small fenced-in lot, growing knee high in some places. A makeshift shed that housed abandoned parts stood to one side, and Jake was walking toward it. Obviously, I was too late. Clearly, he wasn't interested in anything I had to say to him now.

But I couldn't give up. I'd already lost too much, and I wouldn't lose Jake.

"Damn it, Jake!" I cried, and he finally stopped and spun around to face me. Tears welled in my eyes. I was afraid that I had destroyed any chance I'd ever had with him.

"I asked you once. What are you doing here, Addie?" he snapped, and when I didn't answer him, he strode toward me. His body tense, his steps swift. He came to a stop, standing in front of me. He looked angry. His eyes were hooded and dark; his face as hard as stone. Just one more time, I longed to see him smile.

"Damn it, I came here for you!" I cried, but his expression never wavered. He didn't care. Near his thighs, his hands clenched into fists.

"Then, you wasted your time," he replied coldly, and turned walking away. It was all so final.

The air rushed painfully from my lungs with the realization that we were over. This couldn't be it. As I stood in disbelief, a tear streaked down my cheek followed by another one. This definitely wasn't how I'd imagined the evening ending.

"Jake, I'm sorry!" I yelled after him, his steps slowed then he started walking faster, heading toward the shed. It was as if he were trying to get as far away from me as possible. I bit my lip, certain the hollow sensation in my chest was my heart breaking. I trembled, my whole being shaking at the possibility of never being with Jake again. This was really it. I'd come here with the intent to say what I needed to say, and I damn sure wasn't leaving until I did. When I left, at least he would know how I felt. The rest was up to him. However, he decided to handle it.

"Run Jake! Run, whenever things get complicated!" I taunted him.

He stilled. He stood before the shed peering inside. He didn't turn around. "You're an asshole! I came here to tell you that I loved you! I love you, Jake Riley!" I screamed, my voice cracking under the emotions tearing my heart in two.

It was the moment of truth. He ran a frustrated hand through his damp hair. His body tensed, as if he were hovering over an abyss balanced on a tightrope. Either my confession had the power to make us or break us. After a couple minutes of silence, I gave in and turned, unable to stand there waiting any longer for him to send me away.

Tears raced down my cheeks as I walked back into the garage. I'd tried, but it was obvious he didn't want me there. It was truly over. Jake had been right all along. At the first chance of happiness for myself, I had run. I was always scared of losing what I wouldn't let myself have, and I'd fucked up big time with him.

Second chances were a joke. Sometimes in this life, you only got one chance to make it right. No do-overs. One golden opportunity to reach out and grab ahold of your happiness, and I'd blown mine by being afraid and now Jake acted as if he couldn't stand to be in the same room with me, let alone look in my direction. He couldn't even tell me goodbye.

I had to get out of there. I wouldn't beg. I forced myself to walk away when in reality, I wanted to run. When I cut through the garage and headed into the office, I picked up my steps and hurried for the front door. I needed to get to my car. Then, I could fall apart. I screamed in surprise when a pair of strong arms snaked around my waist from behind. I found myself hauled back against a broad muscular chest.

Sobs ripped from my mouth as Jake curled his self around me, burying his face in my hair. The warmth of his body against mine almost broke me. His lips skimmed my ear. His hot breath made me tremble. "Don't cry, Addie."

How dare he tell me not to cry! After all that I had risked to lay my heart at his feet.

So I cried that much harder; my body shaking with my misery. He was torturing me. I just wanted to leave. I wanted to go home, crawl into myself, and once again pick up the shattered pieces of my damaged heart. He shifted behind me and suddenly, my feet were no longer touching the concrete floor. He carried me toward the ratty torn couch against the far wall in the front office. His grip on me was firm as he kicked the green plastic chair out his way. It bounced against the wall with a clatter. He didn't look at me but stared straight ahead and sat down on the couch settling me onto his lap.

"Let me go, Jake," I pleaded, my voice breaking. A girl could only take so much. I wiped my face with my hands trying unsuccessfully to scoot from his lap but one of his arms locked around my waist pulling me roughly against him.

He placed his fingers on my chin and tilted my face upward. His nostrils flared as his gaze held mine. His eyes roved over every square inch of my face. It was killing me to look at him. It hurt to be this close and to know that he would never be mine again. "Just one taste," he murmured, and I stilled at hearing the desperation lacing his voice as his head drifted closer to mine.

Suddenly, my senses which had momentarily taken leave returned with a vengeance and I squirmed against him. If he kissed me then sent me away, I wouldn't survive. His fingers held fast, gripping my chin. "Jake," I protested, trying to evade his lips but I was trapped in place. I had no choice but to bend to his will and accept his kiss. My hands clenched his sweat-slicked arms, and his biceps jerked in reaction to my touch.

"Shut up, Addie," he growled, right before his lips covered mine. His mouth was hot and hard. Every touch, every lick, every stroke magnified by the time we'd spent apart. His lips were firm as they moved masterfully over mine, robbing me of every reason as to why I even thought I should protest. With no sense of self preservation, I gave in; my lips moving hungrily against his. His mouth was so sinful. I surrendered. I lost track of time. I lost track of everything except for the feel of Jake's lips pressed against mine.

Somehow his hand had moved into my hair, and I turned, straddling his lap with my arms wrapped around his neck. When he finally broke the kiss, we were both gazing back at one another in a daze and panting. I had no idea how I'd ended up in this position. The only memory I had was of his heat and his smell clouding my senses.

"You're an asshole," I told him, when he sat there staring at me and didn't speak. It seemed as if nothing had changed between us. I pushed against his chest, trying to get away from him, but his hands grabbed my hips yanking me back into place. Angrily, I glared at him feeling his arousal pressing against me. He had the nerve to flash me a sexy wicked grin.

"I'm your asshole," he said rather proudly as if it were the greatest honor he'd ever been bestowed. Finally, I realized what he'd said, and started laughing.

"You just called yourself an asshole," I told him with a smug smile. His eyes danced mischievously.

"Smartass," he teased, and playfully flipped me over onto the couch covering me with his weight. He felt so good, and so right. His hands slid beneath my T-shirt and I grew still as his fingers traveled along my ribs heading toward my breasts. I wanted him. His fingertips skimmed the band of my bra. He was teasing me. My breath hitched as I peered into his hooded eyes and pushed my hips against his, hearing him suck in a deep breath.

"Jake," I moaned wantonly, and he gritted his teeth.

"Play nice, Addie," he whispered, then his long fingers sneaked up underneath my arms and he began tickling me. Laughing, I begged for mercy; screaming for him to stop. Then, suddenly he did.

"Hey man," said Jake as he tugged my shirt over my bare stomach before moving. When he pushed himself away from me, I saw a guy with a crocked baseball cap and cocky grin standing just inside the door watching us.

"Just wanted to check on my ride," he said.

"It's in the garage, man. Go on back; I'll be with you in a minute." Jake told him.

"Sure thing!" The stranger smiled and tipped his baseball cap at us as he walked through the office heading into the garage.

"Sorry. I forgot that he was stopping by," Jake apologized; a frown marring his face. "I wanted him to check out the bumper before we reattached it tomorrow."

"It's alright," I said, rising to my feet to stand in front of the couch. I walked around the coffee table toward him. "I better get on out of here."

"I'll walk you out," Jake said, and he took my hand in his leading the way.

I followed him outside. I didn't want to go, but he was busy, and I'd taken him by surprise. He opened my car door and let go of my hand. I slipped inside and he pulled my keys from his back pocket handing them to me. I hadn't even realized I'd lost them. Then, he shut my door and stood by the car watching me. I slid the key in the ignition and started the engine glancing back up to meet his eyes. My hands were shaking.

"Wait," he said, and I nodded my head as he turned away, walked around the front of his truck and opened the door. He came striding back to my car and confused; I stared blankly at the silver key gripped in his fingertips. With his other hand, he reached for mine and laid the key against my palm and closed my fingers around it. When he let go, he bent down leaning inside the car through the opened window. "Kiss me," he ordered, and I released the steering wheel and placed the key in my cup holder. There was no need to tell me twice. My hands slid into his hair, the tips of our noses briefly touched. For a second, we smiled at one another. Then his lips melded with mine for a deep, desperate kiss. God, I'd missed him.