Authors: Josephine Cox
Tom was amazed. ‘That’s wonderful, son!’ His spirits were lifted, ‘Does it mean they’re thinking of taking you out of all this…’ he glanced at the restraining mechanism, ‘…all this rigmarole?’
Joe shook his head. ‘I asked the same question,’ he answered. ‘But apparently, it’s all to do with circulation, and a little respite from lying flat on my back for too long at a time.’
In his mind he relived the moment when they raised him forward. ‘It was kind of weird,’ he confessed. ‘My legs felt like blobs of jelly, and my whole body seemed to sink down.’
He relived the moment in his mind. ‘I had this huge urge to push my legs forward, but they wouldn’t go.’
The fear inside him showed itself in his voice as he asked his father, ‘You don’t think it means I’m done, do you, Dad? I mean…if I didn’t feel any strength in my legs, does it mean I can never walk again?’
Tom gave him hope. ‘I’m no doctor,’ he told Joe. ‘But I’m sure they know what they’re doing. They’ve got you this far. I don’t reckon they’re about to give up now.’
He went on encouragingly, ‘As for not feeling any movement in your legs, you have to remember you’ve been flat on your back for a long time now. The muscles will have lost their strength. That’s probably why they’re doing this…to get them going again.’
He could see how desperate Joe was. ‘If they thought there was no chance of you ever walking again, they wouldn’t be putting you through all that, would they now, eh?’
Tom went on encouragingly, ‘Think about it, son. You were shot; both your arms and legs were broken in multiple places, and your lower spine was fractured. I know it may not seem it to you, but I see an improvement every time I come in.’
He pointed out, ‘There was a time when you were wrapped up like a mummy, unable to move your arms and legs, and you couldn’t even turn your head. These doctors have done a fantastic job! I never thought they’d ever put you back together again, but thanks to their skilful work, you’re coming on really well.’
Joe smiled at that. ‘So, what you’re saying is, I’m Humpty Dumpty am I?’
Tom was gladdened to hear him teasing. ‘If yer like,’ he replied with a grin. ‘All I’m saying is, you were smashed up bad. These marvellous people have been able to knit your bones together and, as far as I understand it, they’re hoping there will be no permanent damage.’
Tom was determined to lift Joe’s spirits. ‘You mustn’t
expect too much too quickly, son. Y’see, they can’t just get you out of bed, and ask you to walk along the floor so’s they can see how far you go. There’s testing and trying, and being wary not to go too far too soon. Common sense tells us that much.’
‘I know that, Dad,’ Joe groaned. ‘And I know I have to be patient, but there is so much I want to do. So many things I need to tend to outside of this place.’
There was one particular area that concerned him. ‘I need to get back to work…help keep the farm going. The land needs maintaining. After the late crop it needs feeding and spraying, and there needs to be a working plan for next year. I should be out there Dad, helping you to keep on top of it all.’
‘Listen to me, son. I don’t want you worrying about things like that. You just concentrate on getting well. We’re doing just fine,’ Tom assured him. ‘All we want is for you to get better. Right now, that’s the only thing that matters to me and your mother.’
‘Well, that’s all very fine, Dad, but if the landlord sees the land being neglected what with me and Frank not there, how long will it be before he comes down on you like a ton of bricks? That’s what worries me.’
Tom hated lying, but he didn’t have the heart to tell Joe the bitter truth. ‘Like I said…everything is in hand. The landlord has no need to worry, and neither do you.’
While Joe digested that information, Tom changed the subject. ‘This business of raising the bed and standing you upright. I reckon it’s a way of getting you to the next stage…like actually coaxing you out of this contraption.’
He added worriedly, ‘Look, Joe! You mustn’t think the worst. You need to concentrate on getting better. Whatever it takes, and however long you have to stay here, keep telling yourself, that every day that passes is a day nearer to you coming home. All right? Can you do that for me, son?’
Joe smiled, that handsome, lopsided smile that was uniquely Joe. ‘Everything you said is exactly the same as what the doctor said when I asked him.’
‘There you are then!’
‘I
will
think about what you said, Dad. And I have every intention that one day I might walk out of here on my own two feet.’
He was silent for a moment, thinking of Alice, and how much she meant to him.
Along with his parents, she was his strength. ‘I have to get out of here, Dad, and to that end, I’ll take everything they throw at me…’
The doctors had been encouraging too. Having explained how he still had a long way to go, they were confident he would come through it. Even though it was a slow and delicate process,
Yet however much they tried to reassure him, and however determined he remained, Joe was still fearful that he would never walk again.
‘Being swung upright like that…’ Joe could still recall every excruciating minute of it. ‘I don’t mind telling you, Dad…it was the hardest thing I’ve ever done. It was only a matter of minutes, but to tell you the truth, I was completely exhausted afterwards.’
In truth, he was feeling a little like that now. He was always thrilled to see his father, but the effort of just conversing really took it out of him. When his mother came to see him, she hardly spoke. She held his hand and seemed too upset to say anything, but Joe knew how deeply she felt, and he understood.
Like Nancy, Tom was immensely proud. ‘You’re a real fighter, Joe,’ he told him stoutly. ‘You do what you have to do, and one day, you’ll be standing on your own two feet again. I know it, son. I just know it!’
Leaning over he took hold of Joe’s two hands, and clenched them in his fists. ‘Me and your mother…we’re both so proud of you, son,’ he said brokenly. ‘We really thought we’d lost you.’
Joe felt uneasy. His father seemed unusually emotional today, and at times kind of preoccupied. ‘What’s wrong, Dad? Is there a problem? Is everything all right at home?’
Tom was instantly on his guard. ‘Apart from wanting you home, there’s nothing wrong. Why do you ask?’
Joe was persistent. ‘Is it Frank? Has he been to the farm?’ He feared for their safety. ‘I know they haven’t caught him yet, otherwise why would they stand a police guard outside?’
He had to be careful not to let slip that Frank had actually been here, issuing threats and demands.
Seeing how agitated Joe was getting, Tom cursed himself for allowing his mind to wander back to what the landlord had said. ‘Hey! Now you listen to me, Joe! We’ve neither seen nor heard from Frank in all this time.’
Joe knew there was something on his father’s mind. ‘Something’s niggling at you. What is it, Dad? If it’s money you need, you’ll find my savings book under the bed. Take it, Dad! You have my permission, you know that.’
‘Stop getting yourself in a state, Joe!’ Tom was frightened for him. ‘There is nothing niggling at me, and even if there was, which there isn’t, it wouldn’t be money. Your mother and I have been very careful with our pennies over the years. As for Frank, you can get that out of your head right now. Frank is long gone, and may God forgive me, but I wouldn’t really care if I never saw him again as long as I live!’
Frank had shown no mercy to anyone, least of all to his family. If it had been up to Frank, both Joe and himself, and Alice would be dead right now.
Although there was a time when Tom laid the blame at other people’s door, he had begun to admit that Frank was
little short of a murderer, and that was a terrible thing to learn about your own son.
‘So, there’s nothing else playing on your mind, is there?’ Joe still wasn’t altogether content.
‘Nope! Except for wanting you to stay determined to get out of here. Oh, and I’ve got the blessed gout come back again. Soonever the summer months are behind us, it starts with a vengeance.’
Though he sympathised with his father’s ongoing condition, Joe had heard his father complaining for as far back as he could remember. ‘Are you taking your tablets?’
‘Yup!’ Tom replied doggedly. ‘Your mother makes sure of it.’
‘How is Mum?’
‘Healthy as an ox.’
‘Dad?’
‘Yes, son?’ He hoped Joe might be about to tell him why Alice had been there but he was disappointed.
‘Are you on top of the farm work?
‘Of course!’
‘Okay, so who’s helping you then? Don’t try misleading me, and don’t try telling me you’re coping on your own, because I know that would be an outright lie. I want the truth, Dad. Who have you got working on the farm?’
‘Hey! I’ll thank you not to write me off just yet, young man!’ Tom was frantically searching for time in which to find an answer. ‘I’m still able to do the easier jobs. I can still sit on a tractor and contrary to your thinking my boy, I do know my way round a field. Oh, and I’m a dab hand when it comes to painting the barn.’
‘You still haven’t answered me. Who’s doing the farm work? Who’s keeping the pasture good, and spraying the crops? Who manhandles the hay bales, and fills the field troughs with water for the animals? I need to know, Dad. So, don’t lie to me.’
Tom gave a loud sigh. ‘Like I say, everything is under control. You’ve no need to concern yourself. All you need to do is think about getting out of here, all fit and well.’
‘You still haven’t answered me, Dad!’ Joe was growing more suspicious by the minute. ‘Who have you got working the land? Who’s minding the animals?’
‘Right! Well, there’s Jimmy. He’s worth his weight in gold. Then there’s Lenny the blacksmith’s son. He’s a hard-working, willing young man, looking to earn a wage.’ He puffed out his chest in a show of bravado. ‘Then there’s me and your mother. Between the two of us, we mop up the little jobs. And now I’ve answered enough questions, my boy.’
Having skilfully evaded the question without actually telling the truth, Alice remained strong on Tom’s mind. ‘I reckon it’s time you answered a question for me.’
Joe was intrigued. ‘What kind of question?’
Tom came straight out with it. ‘What did Alice want?’
Joe was taken aback. ‘How did you know she was here?’
‘Never mind that, son. I just want to know what she was doing here?’
‘She was worried about me.’
‘Huh! And so she should be! What else did she want?’
When Joe gave no answer, he asked, ‘Did she come here to cause trouble?’
‘No.’
‘So, what did she
really
want?’
Joe raised the image of Alice in his mind, and his heart grew quiet. ‘Alice was here to apologise for her part in what happened, and I told her it was more my fault than hers. I did wrong. I knew she was marrying Frank, and I should have sent her away. Instead, I wanted her with me. I’ve always loved her, dad. I think you knew that.’
Tom had no wish to discuss the sordid details. ‘Best leave it be,’ he suggested harshly. ‘It’s water under the bridge.’
His main intention now was to keep Alice as far away from Joe as possible.
‘I hope if she shows her face here again, you’ll have the courage to send her on her way.’ He didn’t want to say this, but he felt he had to. ‘You say you made a mistake in not sending her away before, but you have the chance to put that right. If Alice shows her face here again, I want you to get rid of her. Before she can get her claws into you again.’
He had a thought. ‘In fact, maybe I should have a word with the nurse at the desk…’
‘That’s not your decision, Father,’ Joe told him sternly. ‘It’s for me to decide, and if you interfere, I may never forgive you.’
He held his breath before revealing softly, ‘She said she loves me, and you could not understand how wonderful that felt. I have to tell you, Dad, I still love her. So very much.’
Before Tom could say anything, Joe quickly added, ‘You might be pleased to know I did not tell her how I felt about her. Instead, just as you suggested, I sent her away.’
Tom was delighted. ‘You did right!’ he said. ‘I’m so glad you’ve seen sense at last.’
He had already decided not to tell Joe that Alice was pregnant. And now he knew he had done the right thing.
Joe was wearied by the exertion of two visitors in such a short space of time. He had also found his father’s visit to be deeply unsettling. ‘I’m sorry, Dad, but I can’t talk any longer.’ He felt drained, and oddly disturbed.
Understanding that Joe was in need of his rest, Tom bade him goodbye. ‘I’ll see you tomorrow,’ he promised. ‘Look, son, I know it must have been hard for you to send her away, but you really did do the right thing. Later on, when you’re fit and well, you’ll see that, and you’ll know it had to be done.’
With that he left.
After learning that Joe had actually sent Alice away, he went
down the corridor feeling much better. ‘You won’t regret turning her away, son,’ he murmured under his breath. ‘She’s out of your life now. And I for one am thankful!’
Somewhere at the back of his mind he remembered the look in Joe’s eyes when he confessed to still loving Alice. ‘You’ll get over her, son.’ For a fleeting moment, he felt Joe’s pain. ‘I know it must have been hard for you to turn her away, but she’s the one who turned this family inside out, and well she knows it.’ Even now, he could not forget that in giving herself to Joe, Alice had initiated the break up of his family.
His face hardened. ‘Before she came into our lives, we were a close family.’
When he got to the desk and saw the nurse there, he made his way over. ‘Excuse me, Nurse…’
‘Yes, Mr Arnold…’ Tom was recognised by all the staff. ‘…what can I do for you?’
Tom could suddenly hear Joe’s voice in his ear, ‘If you interfere, I may never forgive you…’
‘Sorry, Nurse, er…just now, Joe told me you had him taking the weight of his own body today, and I just wanted to ask…what particular benefit did that have on Joe’s condition?’
The nurse was only too pleased to inform him. ‘It showed us that his bones were mending well, and that his muscles needed extra work before they could take the strains of considerable weight. On the strength of what we found, we’re now able to increase his daily exercises.’