Sway (14 page)

Chapter Twenty-Seven

Lexi stepped out of the bathroom, hair dripping wet and a towel wrapped around her curves.

She stopped when she saw me. “How long was I in there?”

While Lexi had been in the shower, I’d dried and straightened my hair, applied my makeup, and slipped into a lacy tank top tucked into a black Calvin Klein mini. I did a little spin for her.

“You look hot,” she added.

“Thanks.” I pushed some stacked bangles onto one arm then bent over to do up my shoes.

“Who are you looking so hot for?”

I straightened. “You know, I think I’ll go see if Mari and Lacey are ready yet.”

“Uh-huh.” Lexi looked smug. “That’s what I thought.”

“Bye!” I shouted and shut the door behind me.

Like Lexi, Mari and Lacey weren’t even close to ready. Eric and Charlie hadn’t returned from the casino yet. I had an hour or so to kill but I didn’t know what to do. My whole body felt antsy. I’d never be able to focus on TV or a book, and my mind was too full for idle chatter. Ordinarily, I’d de-stress at the piano, but I didn’t have that option here.

After listening to Lacey and Mari blather on for a few minutes, I went back to my room. I spritzed on a light perfume and grabbed my purse. “Text me when everyone’s ready,” I shouted at Lexi who turned off her blow dryer. “I’ll meet you down in the lobby.”

“Where are you going?”

I shrugged. “Who knows? I’ll see you in a bit.”

Down on the main level, I wandered through the slot machines, the poker tables, the clouds of smoke. I was hoping to find some shops to browse—anything to keep me occupied. The constant trill of the slots pounded through my skull and I almost changed my mind and went back to my room.

But I couldn’t go back, Lexi would just bug me about Eric. She had known all along that I still had feelings for him, but I wouldn’t listen. Even now, I didn’t want to believe it. Gage was my boyfriend now. And then there was Kaz. We’d been in a relationship for years. Hadn’t I moved on? Wasn’t all that proof that I was over Eric, had been for years?

My mind withdrawn, I didn’t pay attention to where my heels were taking me. The noise of the casino faded into the background. The people I passed were nothing more than blurry faces.

Eric was my first love. People never really get over their first loves—maybe that’s all this was. That, and simple jealousy at seeing him with Lacey. Add to that countless memories I’d repressed of our past together and my mind was a minefield of epic proportions.

The sound of a piano drifted through the din. At first, I thought it was just in my head. Then I turned a corner and the casino gave way to an open space with a bar off to one side, a few couches and chairs and a glossy black grand piano.

A John Krasinski look-a-like occupied the bench, playing Billy Joel and singing slightly off-key. His playing was much better than his voice. Despite that, the choppy chords mixed with bubbling notes instantly relaxed me. I took a seat on an empty couch. If I couldn’t relax through playing, listening would have to do.

He moved from Billy Joel to Coldplay to Ray Charles. With one leg crossed over the other, my free foot swung to the music as if I was the conductor leading the performer. I closed my eyes and sank into the couch.

When the pianist asked for requests, I wanted to suggest Schubert but decided against it—not exactly a crowd pleaser. He took a request for Adele, launching into a deeper version of “Someone like You.” I mouthed along to the lyrics, seeing Eric behind every word.

I hadn’t moved on. My relationship with Eric had changed me. When it had ended, I couldn’t go back to what I was, but I didn’t feel like me without him. Looking back, I spent years going through the motions. Acting how I thought I should act and doing the things expected of me. Kaz had been wonderful, but safe. I’d chosen him—so different from Eric—because I knew we would never have the kind of relationship Eric and I had. I would never fall as deep. I realized now that I’d done it to protect myself.

Then there was Gage. I tilted my head onto the back of the couch, my eyes slid closed as I pictured Gage in all his flat-abbed glory. He was a great guy and our dates had been perfection, until the boat. But did I really care for him, or was he just a distraction? Another lie to myself, and to Eric, that I’d moved on?

The couch shifted beside me and I opened my eyes.

“You’re like a moth to a flame.”

I lifted my head. Eric. He was still in his shorts and baseball cap.

“At least here I won’t get burned,” I said.

He blinked. His hands twitched in his lap. I swallowed and looked away.

“I take it no one else is ready,” he said.

“Just me.” My foot swung in anxious circles. I glanced at him then couldn’t look away. I drank him in, the casual tilt of his hat, his lips a perfect curve, his knee bouncing next to mine. In the background, the pianist was playing “The Rose.” The melody ached and I longed to drown it out. “Miss Gail used to hate this song, do you remember?”

A faraway look entered his eyes. “That’s right. Man, you could not get her to stop once she started in on it.”

Miss Gail was my piano teacher growing up. She had also been Eric’s—sort of. After his parents died, he couldn’t afford lessons. He would come with me to mine, and eventually, she began to teach him too during my hour.

“The song is tainted now,” I said. “I can barely listen to it.”

He smiled. “Is she still in Pasadena?”

“Yep,” I said. “She retired.”

“I should give her a call. Say hey.”

“You should. I know she’d love to hear from you.”

“Do you still keep in touch?” he asked.

“Yeah.”

His smile turned wry. “You always were her star pupil.”

My eyebrows rose. “Are you kidding? Whenever you weren’t around, I wouldn’t hear the end of you. ‘Ava, you need to be more like your Wentworth boy. He’s got a gift. You mark my words, Ava Elliot, your Wentworth boy is going to the top.’”
Find the drive, Ava, find the drive,
she’d yell, punctuating each remark with a rap on my elbow while I played. Every correction she made was accompanied by the elbow bump. Even now, I still raise my elbow unconsciously after I’ve made a mistake.

Eric was quiet as he searched my face. “Your Wentworth boy? I didn’t know she called me that.”

My face grew hot. “You didn’t?”

“You never told me.”

I looked down at my knees. “She called me, you know. When your first album came out.” My fingers tapped to the piano notes playing nearby. “She was so excited. She kept saying, ‘I knew your Wentworth boy would make it! I knew it!’”

“And what did you say?”

My mouth went dry, my heart drummed in my chest. “I told her I knew it too.” What I didn’t tell her was that he was no longer my Wentworth boy. I couldn’t say it back then and I couldn’t admit it now.

“I acknowledged her,” he said. I looked at him. “In my dedication. Did she know?”

“She knew. It made her very happy.”

Eric’s fingers tapped on his knee and I wanted to smile. We still shared something in common at least. “She didn’t have to teach me. She didn’t even get paid for it,” he said. “I owe her a lot.” His eyes locked on mine and I inhaled a gasp. “And you. For giving up some of your lesson time for me.”

My throat felt thick. I shrugged. “She really was the best teacher,” I said, turning the conversation back to safer ground. “I hope I can be like her.” Miss Gail had been strict but not mean, dedicated but not obsessed. She not only brought the best out of her students, but she knew how to find the weaknesses and turn them to strengths. At Juilliard, when I had mentored and taught at the local elementary school, I’d tried to emulate her. To let my love and enthusiasm for the piano show through, like Miss Gail had.

Eric frowned. “Like her?”

“I got a teaching job,” I said with a sideways glance. “At an arts high school in LA.”

“Really? High school?”

I was getting used to this reaction. “I know…”

“No,” he said with a shake of his head. “I mean, I didn’t know you were interested in teaching. It’s…new.” He studied me in a way that said he didn’t know me at all. I knew exactly how he felt.

“I got offered a job at USC Thornton as well but I decided to take the high school position. Teenagers can be a pain, but they’re enthusiastic. And a lot more eager to learn.” Kids who took music seriously in high school worked hard, but in most cases, they hadn’t yet reached the point where the quest for fame overtook the love of music itself. That’s who I wanted to teach, who I wanted to be around.

Eric had an expression on his face that I didn’t recognize. “Wow, that’s…”

I was afraid he’d react like Gage. “Crazy?”

He smiled, the corners of his eyes creasing. Dad would have been aghast at the wrinkles, but I loved the change—a small difference from how he used to look. “No. Incredible.”

A flush crept over my cheeks. “It’s not a big deal.”

He was looking at me in an entirely new way—another change I could easily embrace. My body shifted toward him. I found myself staring at his lips and wondering if they still felt the same.

“It’s a big deal if you’re excited about it. I can tell you are.”

Staring at his lips was a bad idea, I had to stop. “I am. Excited, I mean. I can’t wait to start.”

“You’ll be a great teacher.”

We stared at each other. The music, which had faded into the background, trickled forward. The John Krasinski
doppleganger
was going against his entire look and singing Bruno Mars, his whole body grooving to the beat.

Eric adjusted the brim of his baseball cap. “I guess I should go change. I don’t want to keep everyone waiting.” He stood. “Will you be waiting here?”

I suppressed a smile. “I told Lexi to call me when everyone’s ready. I’ll meet you in the lobby.”

Eric nodded. His chest rose and his mouth opened, as if he was about to say something else, but then he turned away. I watched him leave, his steps matching the beat of the doo-wop emitting from the piano.

Chapter Twenty-Eight

During dinner, I had a hard time concentrating on my salmon and rice pilaf. I could feel Eric’s gaze on me. My eyes constantly found his. We were like two boats drawn to the same whirlpool. Two notes attached by a tie and holding, indefinitely.

We headed to the Vdara Hotel after dinner for an exclusive party in honor of a band called Dark River. Eric knew the bassist, made a call and we were in.

Lacey sparkled in her sequined gold dress. She twirled under the rooftop lights, Eric tight in her grasp. They looked like the classic golden couple, and I soon felt that any moment we’d had, during dinner or while talking by the piano, had all been in my head.

Lexi and I kept Sam company. I didn’t know what he was doing at the party in the first place. He did nothing but sit in a chair, his eyes glued to the ground. The only time he stirred was to top up his beer. At least his misery distracted me from my own.

At one point, when Sam had sunk back into his melancholy, Lexi pulled me from my seat.

“No offence to Smilin’ Sam,” she said as we walked away, “but there are a lot of hot guys here and I’d like to meet at least one or two.”

She had borrowed one of my Herve Leger bandage dresses, and she filled it out much better than I did. A few men were already giving us the eye. She winked back, but I felt on display and uncomfortable.

“What are the odds that I meet the love of my life here?” she asked. We stopped so she could grab a drink off a waiter’s tray.

“I’d invest in lottery tickets first,” I said. She drooped. “But then again, you never know.”

As if by some grand design, two men appeared in front of us. Both had longish blond hair and tanned surfer bodies. The one grinning sloppily at me barely reached my height in stilettos.

“Wanna drink?” he slurred. Each hand cupped a beer bottle. Lexi’s surfer was already whispering sweet nothings into her ear. She tilted her head back and laughed.

“No, thanks,” I said to the man who had presumably chosen me.

“How ’bout a swim?”

“No again.”

“Didn’t bring your suit?” he asked. He tucked one beer under his arm and leaned forward. His lips widened in an easygoing grin. I probably would have thought him cute if he wasn’t breathing Guinness fumes in my face. “’Cuz I’ve got an extra one.”

“An extra woman’s bathing suit?” I asked, despite myself. “With you?”

His free hand stroked down my arm. “An extra pair of shorts. You don’t need a top.”

“No for the third time. I guess third time really is the charm.” I stepped back. “Lex, I’m going to find Mari.” She shot me an inquiring look but I waved it away.

I dodged around beer-boy. He reached for me but his drunken reflexes were too slow.

“Hey, c’mere,” he yelled behind me. “No swimming then, if you don’t wanna. We’ll just…just…you know.”

I snorted and kept on walking.

“Have a drink with me,” he said, his voice much closer than I expected.

I turned around and gave him my hardest glare. “Find someone else to annoy. You’re not going to get anywhere with me.”

He backed off. A woman who could speak in full sentences probably intimidated his sluggish brain. When I turned back around, Eric was standing in front of me.

“Are you okay?” he asked. He looked like he was ready to lunge at something.

“Yeah, why?”

He looked at me blankly. “I thought…”

“What?”

He gave a sheepish laugh. “I thought you needed… Never mind. I guess not.”

He’d been watching me. He was coming to my rescue. “Thanks anyway,” I said, but I stood frozen, staring up at him.

A warm breeze trickled over my bare arms and ruffled the top of his hair, the collar of his shirt. The smell of chlorine and alcohol filled the air and I wanted to get closer to Eric, to take in his scent instead.

“I guess you don’t need me anymore,” Eric said.

I took an inadvertent step toward him but my legs wobbled on my stilettos. He steadied me with one hand, cupping my elbow. Breath rushed out of my chest. I opened my mouth to speak.

“Hey, let’s go swimming!”

The words weren’t mine, but Lacey’s. She had slipped out of her sequined dress and into a black bikini that looked like
La Perla
underwear. She wrapped an arm around Eric. “You come too, Ava,” she said.

I shook my head. Lacey began to undo the buttons of Eric’s shirt and I turned away.

I guess you don’t need me anymore
, he’d said.

I stumbled through the crowd. Eric was wrong. He was the one who didn’t need me.

* * * * *

Mari and Charlie were at a table chowing down on appetizers. Mari, with her short brown hair curled into ringlets and her pale yellow dress looked like a grown-up Shirley Temple. Chicken wing sauce smeared over her chin ruined the cutesy effect. “Oh good, Ava,” Mari said, her mouth full. “Tell Charlie he has to dance with me.”

I almost got up from the seat I’d just taken. I did not need this right now.

Charlie sighed loudly. “I don’t feel like it. Geez, Mari. Give it a rest. Give
me
a rest.”

Mari snorted. She opened her mouth, no doubt to let him have it, but I shot her a warning look.
Be nice
, I mouthed.

“Fine,” she said. “You’ve got five minutes to finish your nachos and then you’re dancing with me.” Her return look said,
See, I can be nice
.

Charlie took her warning seriously and dug into his nachos so he could finish them in time.

My eyes wandered over the crowds, around people dancing and talking, sliding away from couples making out. Lexi was still chatting up the same guy. He had moved one hand to her waist. Nearby, Eric sat at the edge of the pool, his legs dangling in the water.

Lacey was in the pool. She rested her arms on Eric’s legs, a drink clutched in one hand. A flash of jealousy flared in my chest but I stomped on it. As much as I wanted it to, my rediscovered feelings for Eric wouldn’t change his relationship status.

I watched Lacey in full-on flirt mode. She giggled, twirled her hair, rubbed his legs, and scooped water over her chest. She took sips of her drink until it was empty, peering at him through her dark lashes. He hardly moved. I wondered idly if he’d told her he loved her yet. Despite myself, my heart went out to Lacey. I knew firsthand what it was like to love someone and not have it returned.

“Time’s up,” Mari said. I wrenched my eyes from Eric and Lacey. Charlie hadn’t finished his nachos and crunched loudly on a chip in defiance.

“Fine. If you’re not going to dance with me, then I’ll go dance by myself,” Mari said. Charlie, his arms folded across his chest, watched Mari stalk away.

“Go with her,” I said.

“I don’t want to dance,” Charlie whined. “I don’t want to stand. I just want to go back to the hotel and go to bed. I’m tired.”

“She wants you with her,” I said gently. “That’s not a bad thing, you know.”

Charlie looked disgruntled. “Fine. You’re right.”

Charlie joined Mari, grabbing her around the waist and pulling her close. Her face lit up and I smiled. My gaze trickled back to Eric and Lacey.

Lacey was getting out of the pool. Water ran down her body, dripping into a puddle beside Eric. She grabbed a shot off the tray of a nearby waiter and knocked it back. Her eyes were on Eric but he wasn’t looking at her. His face, covered in flickering shadow, faced the pool.

She must have called his name because he finally looked up at her. She leaned over him, running her hand across his back. I wanted to look away. They were going to start making out and I didn’t need to see that. But for some reason I couldn’t stop watching.

Lacey trailed kisses across his cheek to his lips. He leaned away and stood up.

With his face now in the light, I could see that Eric wasn’t smiling. He didn’t look angry, more…distracted. Lacey put her hands on his chest, then his face. She pressed her wet body against him. He looked down at her but something was wrong. I could see it on his face. Sure enough, they started to argue. I couldn’t hear them, but Lacey stepped back and started waving her arms around. She’d clearly had too much to drink. Eric shook his head, his lips disappeared in a thin line. She turned and stalked away from him.

Lacey grabbed a beer from a waiter and took a swig. Eric watched her for a second and then went to her side. It looked, by the expression on his face, like he was apologizing. Lacey spun around, shoved the beer bottle into Eric’s hands and brushed past him.

My heartbeat sped up against my will. Maybe I’d get a second chance after all. That thought brought a rush of excitement through my body and a simultaneous pang of guilt and disgust. Hadn’t I said to Britt that I wanted him to be happy? And what about Lacey’s feelings? I lowered my eyes in shame.

Then I heard him yell her name.

Lacey stumbled toward the pool.

“Lacey, stop!” Eric shouted again, but she didn’t hear. Or didn’t listen. She looked back at him, a defiant twist to her mouth, and then back-flipped into the pool. Or at least she tried.

There was a loud smack. Her head had hit the side of the pool and she went under.

Eric dove in after her.

I ran to the poolside, my eyes searching the water for Eric and Lacey. They were nothing more than a smudgy blur, like an impressionist painting. Finally they broke the surface, Lacey wrapped in Eric’s arms. Her eyes were closed. The water was red around them. Eric kicked frantically to the edge. I helped him lift her out of the pool.

“No, Lacey,” Eric moaned. He was out of the pool and at her side in a second. Lacey was pale, blood stained her blonde hair to an awful orangey color.

“Lacey, wake up.” Eric stroked her face with his hands, begging her to open her eyes.

The music had stopped and a crowd had gathered around us.

“Eric,” I said urgently. I put my fingers against her neck but couldn’t find a pulse. Frantically, I felt around in case I missed the spot, but there was nothing.

Someone started to shriek. “She’s dead! She’s dead!” It was Mari, of course it was.

“She’s not dead, Mari,” I said, but that didn’t stop her insane screaming. “Charlie, get her out of here!” I didn’t watch to see if he obeyed, but the sound of her insane wailing gradually faded away.

“Someone call 911!” I yelled.

“Already done.” Lexi’s cell phone was pressed to her ear.

“Eric, she needs CPR.”

He looked up at me and blinked. “I don’t… I’ll do what I can but… Sam! Sam’s had training!”

I jumped to my feet but Sam was already there. He pushed Eric aside and started to perform CPR on Lacey. Pinching her nose, opening her mouth, pressing his mouth over hers to give her the breath of life. He pumped her chest. Breathed in her mouth again. More pumps. We all held our breath as we watched Sam at work, trying to revive Lacey.

A trickle of water escaped from her mouth. She coughed and spluttered. There was a collective gasp from the crowd. Lacey opened her eyes, looked up at Sam, and then passed out.

The momentary relief died from Eric’s face. “What happened?”

Sam checked her pulse. “She’s alive. Her pulse is weak, but I can feel it.” He leaned his ear over her mouth. “She’s still breathing.”

“Maybe she’s lost too much blood,” I said.

“Get a towel and press it to her head,” Sam ordered. Eric scrambled up and grabbed a white towel, handing it to Sam. We watched as he gently lifted Lacey’s head and pressed the towel over the blood.

Minutes later, the EMT’s arrived and took over. They placed Lacey on a gurney and carted her into the hotel, down the elevator and into an ambulance. Charlie jumped in with her and in seconds, the ambulance was gone.

* * * * *

In the backseat of the rental SUV, Mari’s screams had subsided into sobs. Beside her, Sam stared out the window, tears running down his cheeks. Only Lexi sat quietly, her face impassive. She could have been a statue.

I sat in the passenger seat, gnawing my nails to stubs. Eric drove, his hands clenched around the steering wheel. His whole body was tense, the muscles in his arms and neck rigid.

“It’s going to be okay,” I said. I dropped my hands to my lap, my fingers clenching together.

Eric didn’t reply. I rested my hand on his arm. He looked down at my hand and then over at me.

“It’s going to be okay,” I repeated. His eyes were so full of pain, his face creased with worry, that it hurt to look at him. I ached to take it all away.

He wrenched his gaze back to the front. His lips moved, but I couldn’t hear the words. I dropped my hand from his arm and shifted closer.

“It’s all my fault.”

“No.” I was so surprised that I almost shouted it. “It’s not your fault. Not at all.”

“Yes. It is.” He shook his head, his hands clenched tighter on the wheel. “If I hadn’t been… I should have paid more attention to her. If I had, she wouldn’t have had so much to drink.”

A wide, gaping pit opened in my stomach. “Eric, it will be okay.” I didn’t know if that was true, but I couldn’t think of anything else to say.

He slammed on the breaks and I looked up to see a red light.

Eric hung his head. “I can’t do this,” he whispered.

I wanted to take his pain away. If I knew how, I would have done it in an instant.

A car honked behind us. The light had turned green. We drove the rest of the way to the hospital in heavy silence.