Authors: Amy Johnson
“So?” she said
,
her voice coming out more cheerful than she expected. “What’s the worst part? Uncle Vito gonna come knee cap Ted?” Serves the bastard right she thought. Hell this might not be so bad
.
T
hey could kick Ted’s ass and maybe she could watch. Maybe they could kick the marbles out of him.
“Tiffany,” Jack said, and Megan snapped her head up to meet his gaze suddenly interested
.
“See
,
Tiffany is Sal Madrino’s girl. He hired me to keep tabs on her. I didn’t know anything about the drugs at the time.” Megan suddenly felt the need to sit down and she gripped the counter for leverage. Jack took her hand and guided her to a chair then took another chair and sat it directly in front of her, so close that their knees were touching.
O
K,
Ted was in trouble. What did that have to do with her? People don’t laugh at them anymore. They’re dangerous. And stupid. Shit.
“Go on,” she told Jack.
“Apparently Ted was looking for a way to make some quick cash so he approached the Madrino brothers about doing some business. I’m pretty sure it was Tiffany’s idea or she at least introduced them. Anyhow
,
they did a few small deals that Ted made good on so when he wanted to up the ante they were happy to oblige.” Jack was sitting so close to her that he could smell her subtle perfume and he yearned to reach out and stroke her hand, but he didn’t dare. If he let his heart get involved this time he’d probably end up back in the bottle. Or if she let him touch her and taste her and…he’d always wonder if it was because she was scared and vulnerable. He wanted her to want him. Bad.
“So, what happened then? And what does all of this have to do with me?” Megan asked in a detached tone. So Ted was a drug dealer. It didn’t surprise her
,
although a week ago it would have. She never would have thought he was a cheater either. Hell, if Jack told her Ted had been the mystery shooter on the grassy knoll, she’d probably believe that too.
“So they made a larger deal and Ted moved the stuff. I think he stashed the money in his office, although I’m not sure
,
and then it vanished. When the Madrino brothers came asking for their money Ted gave them excuse after excuse. Guess they’re tired of excuses.” Jack noticed the change of color in her face but couldn’t decipher her expression. To his surprise she cracked up with laughter. He frowned.
“What?” he asked and she struggled to speak between laughs.
“Nothing
.
I
t’s just that you look so serious and these guys…well they’re a joke. You should have seen them when they were kids,” she said and he thought
I did, I grew up about four blocks from them.
“I mean
,
they were losers with a capital L. Always talking about their mob connections and crazy uncles. It was all such B.S. Hell, they graduated way before me and we were still laughing at them after they were gone. These guys are harmless. All talk.”
Had she never read a newspaper? “Megan, Sal served six years for rape and he was guilty of a lot more.” Her smile disappeared. “And Angelo has been in out of jail for everything from possession to attempted murder, not to mention his acquittal on a murder charge.” Her body stiffened and he saw the color of her eyes change from a clear, playful blue to dark, blue fear. He put his hands on her knees as a steadying comfort.
“But this has nothing to do with me. Why would they hurt me?”
s
he cried
,
her voice small, her mind still trying to grip the reality.
“To get to Ted. To get their money back,” Jack said, wanting to take her in his arms.
“So we call the cops,” she said, “and then I’m going to see Ted. And he better be glad he’s in the damn hospital because when I get through with him he’s going to have a lot more than a marble up his butt. I’m gonna kill him. Save the Madrino brothers the trouble.”
“Megan,” Jack began but stopped when a car pulled into to the driveway, the lights casting a glow on the kitchen wall. Jack moved to the window and saw a Taxi sitting in the drive with an elderly woman getting out of the back passenger side door. Megan
,
standing behind Jack
,
peered out and went to the back door.
“That’s my granny. What on earth is she doing here?” Megan said noticing the small suitcase the petite woman was carrying. “Granny?” She called out, holding the door open as the little old lady climbed the two steps and walked in.
“Where’s the can? It’s been a long ride. I gotta pee worse than a dog in heat gotta sniff butts.” Megan pointed her to the downstairs bathroom even though the plumbing often got clogged, doubting her grandmother could make it up the stairs to the other bathroom. “You know when you get old, nothing works right. My bladder’s shrunk to about the size of a jelly bean. I’m thinking bout getting me some of those Depends diapers. I got a cute little meals on wheels boy who I wouldn’t mind changing my diaper.” Megan blushed bright red and Jack bit back a laugh. “I’m always telling him older women make better lovers. Why
,
just the other day I was telling him about how me and your grandfather used to…” Her voice trailed off as she shut the door to the bathroom and Megan covered her forehead with her hand and picked up the phone to call her mother and when no one answered she cradled the phone and sat down. Grandma Lou came out of the bathroom and undressed Jack with her eyes.
“Why, aren’t you a cutie patootie,” she said as flirtatiously as a seventy five year old woman dressed in polyester and smelling like moth balls c
ould
. She pinched his cheek and smiled. “Much handsomer than that stick in the mud Ted. Now move your cute little tush and get my bags from the cab.” Jack looked at Megan and caught the dreadful expression on her face.
“Yes ma’am,” he said and opened the door when Megan’s hand caught his arm and stopped him.
“What bags Granny?”
“Oh, forgot to tell you. I’m moving in
.
”
T
hen to Jack, “Hurry up
,
sweet thang, the meters running.” Megan felt like throwing up. Grandma Lou was a handful and Megan was already up to her ears in shit. She didn’t need this. Jack opened the door wider and Megan’s grasp on his arm tightened.
“What do you mean you’re moving in? What happened this time?” Megan inquired dreading the answer. Granny was hell on wheels and apparently another nursing home had kicked her out.
“I got kicked out of Peaceful Meadows. Never liked the damn place anyway. Bunch of prudes. I keep telling them blondes have more fun but they’re just a bunch of party poopers.”
“Granny
,
you’re not blonde.” Her grandmother removed her scarf from her head and Megan took a step back. Not only was her grandmother a platinum blonde, but her hair was cut in a punk rocker spike with streaks of hot pink glittering brightly.
“Granny!” Megan said
,
but her grandmother was busy flirting with Jack who was complimenting her on her hair.
“Why thank you, hot stuff,” Granny said. “Now get my bags and pay the cabbie
,
will you?” Megan released Jack’s hand and he went out the door. “And be careful with that little bag. It has my crystal ball and medicine in it.” She winked at Megan and Megan forced a small smile. Jack returned carrying three bags a huge grin on his face. Megan wanted to slap him. Or jump him. Either would be satisfying about now.
“OK
,
Granny, why did you get kicked out this time?” Granny ignored Megan and sat at the table, ordering Jack to do the same.
He sat down and she grabbed his hand turning it palm up. “OK
,
young man
,
let’s see what you’ve got.” Jack was patient
,
giving that dangerous grin while Megan explained to Jack that her grandmother thought she was a palm reader. Granny narrowed her stern eyes at Megan and pursed her lips.
“I am a palm reader
.
B
een doing it sixty years. Never been wrong either.” She went back to Jack’s calloused palm
,
leaving Megan pacing the floor.
“Granny, why did you get kicked out?” Megan said and her grandmother raised a hand with neon green fingernails to quiet her. Megan gave up for the moment and fed the dogs. When there was a fine male specimen in the room or a palm to be read Granny had a one track mind.
“I see darkness here,” Granny indicated running a long finger across Jack’s hand. “Lot’s of secrets and pain.” She looked at Jack and he nodded still smiling that devilish grin.
“Granny,” Megan said and her grandmother once again raised her hand and ignored her. “But here, oh my son, I see love.” Jack glanced at Megan with a heat in his eyes that made Megan’s stomach flip. She involuntarily held his gaze, feeling the electricity from it penetrate her. “And babies, lots of brown eyed babies.” Megan turned from Jack’s intoxicating gaze and went to feed Spot.
When she returned to the kitchen her grandmother was setting up her crystal ball as Jack sat watching the old woman with a humorous expression.
“Granny,” Megan said, moving the crystal ball from her grandmother’s reach. “Tell me why you got kicked out of the retirement home or I’m calling Mom.” Her grandmother slapped her hand and chuckled, a rebellious look in her eye.
“Go ahead. She won’t answer the phone.”
“What?” Megan asked
,
hoping she hadn’t heard her grandmother correctly.
“That sourpuss Lydia, from the home already called her. She told her to send me here.” She paused and surveyed the kitchen. “Got anything to feed an old woman?” So her mother was home and not taking her calls? Oh hell!
“O
K,
for the last time Granny, what did you do?” Megan asked through narrowed eyes as Jack settled in comfortably to watch, his brown eyes dancing, his mouth tipped up into a sultry smile.
“I was just having a little fun.”
“Granny!” Megan planted her hands on her hips.
“It was nothing really.”
“Granny!” Megan leaned forward to challenge her grandmother’s menacing grin.
“Oh
,
alright, it all started because one of those hateful Bingo broads called us the blue haired club during Bingo and it really yanked our chains.”
“So?” Megan said
,
raising an eyebrow.
“So, on Thursday when sweet cheeks came to visit I had him do our hair.” She ran her finger through it and grinned. “Then he did our nails and toenails.”
“Sweet cheeks?” Jack asked
,
amused.
“Mickey,” Megan informed him. “Granny calls him sweet cheeks because he used to have chubby cheeks and she used to squeeze them.”
“Not true
,
Megan,” Granny argued. “I call him that because he has a nice set of buns. Too bad he’s gay. I’d like to show him a trick or two. Anyway, he did our hair and told us we looked bitchin’ so we told the Bingo hag our table was to be referred to from now on as the Bodacious Bit
c
hin’ Babes.”
She flashed Jack a big smile and he said, “You Go
,
Granny.”
Megan shot him a look that could’ve singed his eyebrows. “Don’t encourage her.”
“So,” Granny continued, “they kicked us out of the
B
ingo Hall. Said we can’t use that kind of language. The prudes!”
“Uh huh,” Megan said
,
reminding herself to bitch slap Mickey.
“And you know how I like to gamble.”
“Uh huh,” Megan said.
“So we formed our own club.” She gave a dramatic pause. “We went to Mildred’s room and planned us a poker night.”
“So they kicked you out for playing poker?
”
Jack asked
.
“That’s kind of overkill.”
“Just wait, I’m sure it gets better,” Megan said
,
knowing that mischievous tone in her grandmother’s voice. She prompted Granny, “So?”
“So we had Ester’s grandson smuggle us in some booze and smokes. Can you believe that idiot brought us Mad Dog 20 20 and generic smokes?” Megan grimaced. Well
,
at least Granny wasn’t smoking dope. Yet. “And we spread the word about the big game.” Megan rolled her eyes and sat down as her grandmother continued
.
“So I stood at door to collect the cover charge and frisk people as they came in and…”
“Frisk them for what?” Megan asked
,
not wanting to know the answer.
“Nothing really
,
I just always wanted to do that. You know
,
like in the cop shows. Plus I’m an old woman
.
F
risking old men was the highlight of my day. You know, see who can still get it up?” Jack laughed while Megan was mortified. Her grandmother got kicked out of a nursing home for playing with old men and she had orgasms on massage tables. Her mother was going to have a stroke.