Ignite (9 page)

“No,” she replies, shaking her head slowly as she slides the game out of her way, holding my heavy eyes.

God, I want her.

“Okay,” I start quietly, watching as she raises slightly onto her knees and moves across the mattress until she’s directly in front of me, hands resting on my shoulders. “What do you wanna do, Addie?”

“Zeke,” she whispers against my mouth, so close I can already taste the cherry vodka on her hot breath as it washes over my skin. “I want you to kiss me.”

Addie

The words are barely out of my mouth before he pulls me close enough to straddle him and presses his lips to mine. He starts the kiss out soft and slow, but in no time it begins to deepen, making my head spin.

As his hand cradles the back of my neck, he begins to wind his fingers into my hair and suck on my lower lip and I feel every one of my doubts fleeing one by one. Gripping his shirt, I press my hands against his chest and pull away with heavy breath as I hold his eyes.

“You okay?” he pants against my lips and I nod immediately.

“Yeah,” I tell him, pulling the purple tank top I’m wearing over my head and tossing it to the side.

The surprise in his eyes isn’t lost on me, but this isn’t the first time I’ve done this, so I still don’t think he’s onto me just yet. As the full effects of the vodka hit me, I sway slightly on top of him, forced to grip him to stay upright. Before I manage to make a complete ass of myself, he catches me and lowers me onto my back.

Pushing the game off of the bed altogether, I listen to it crash against the floor as he hovers over me for a moment, watching my heavy breathing for a moment.

“Your lips taste so good, Addie,” he husks out, caging me with his arms.

He’s lowering his mouth to mine when he stops, his gaze darting toward my bedroom window.

“What’s-”

“Shh,” he cuts me off, his gaze staying locked on the window for a moment before he looks down at me again. “Did you hear that?”

“No,” I admit truthfully as I watch him reach for the remote and cuts the volume on the stereo slightly. “I didn’t hear anything.”

“I could have sworn I just heard a voice,” he says after a moment of near silence, his voice taking on a slight slur.

“And people think I’m the weird one,” I snort, causing him to look down at me with a grin.

“Shut up,” he says, lowering himself back to my lips and taking them captive once again.

Now that I’m not relying so much on my brains to keep myself upright, I begin to fully appreciate the feel of his tongue as it sweeps against mine. He does that thing where he sucks on my lower lip again, one hand tangled into my hair and the other slowly moving up my stomach, further hazing my thoughts.

When he moves his lips down my neck, I feel the heat spreading into me and I let out a low groan of approval.

“Feel good, babe?” he whispers, pulling a nod from me and his gentle smirk forces the heat into my cheeks.

Raising slightly, he begins to pull his shirt over his head and following his lead, I reach behind my back and unhook my bra, tossing it to the side. I rest my head against the mattress again, embracing the liquid haze I’ve become prisoner to as I feel it spreading throughout my limbs.

As I feel his gaze travel over my body, I realize for the first time, I’m not nervous anymore. At first, I think I’m just understanding the whole ‘liquid courage’ fully for the first time. Once I feel his weight on top of me, though, I know that’s not the reason for my calm at all.

It’s him.

Zeke

It isn’t lost on me that Addie and I have done just about everything two best friends can do. When I pulled back into the driveway next door at the beginning of the summer, I naively thought we were running out of firsts to experience together. However, as she rests against her mattress, her bare chest completely open to me, I take her in and realize how naïve I’d really been.

I’d always thought she was pretty, but as I run my eyes over her body, drunk or not, I’m rendered speechless. Leaning on one arm over her shoulder to keep my balance, I carefully run my palm over her stomach, working my way up to her chest. I hold her eyes as long as possible until they begin to flicker closed. She remains nearly silent, but her crimson cheeks and the way her breathing falters assures me I’m doing everything right.

Lowering slightly, I run my lips over her jaw and bury my face into her neck, skimming the dip behind her ear with my tongue. The action makes her begin to quake slightly beneath me and as she lets out a whimper of pleasure, my shorts begin to tighten as my cock hardens instantly.

Turning her head, she looks up at me through hooded eyes, her gaze moving slowly from my eyes to my lips as she wraps her arms around my neck. When I start to massage her chest, she lets out a sigh and pulls me to her mouth. I kiss her deeply, resting between her thighs, my hips instinctively beginning to rock against hers.

Dipping my head forward, I run my tongue over her hard nipple, loving the way she begins to squirm beneath me. The movement does crazy things to my body and I can’t hold in the deep groan as the friction between us begins to build. I meant what I’d told her before, I’d never pressure her into anything she wasn’t ready for, but I was still a nineteen-year-old guy.

“Oh my God,” she gasps as I pull her nipple into my lips, lightly skimming it with my teeth.

Placing her hands on my jaw, she pulls me back to her mouth and kisses me hard. Caging her in with my arms, I feel her hands fall to my biceps for a minute before they fall away. Surprising me, she begins clumsily pushing her jeans down her tan legs, using her feet to help free her from the denim prison.

“Addie…” I start, a combination between complete shock and total arousal coursing through me.

I glance between us and see the tiny, light blue cotton panties she’s wearing are the only thing separating us now.

“I’m ready,” she tells me, her hazel eyes meeting mine and sending sparks through me.

“What?”

“I’m ready, Zeke,” she repeats, her voice soft and slightly slurred. “I want to have sex.”

Holy shit. I did
not
see that coming.

Addie

As his perfect indigo eyes take me in, an odd feeling of complete safety and overwhelming vulnerability courses through my veins. When what feels like an eternity passes without another word from him, the silence is more than I can take.

“Did you change your mind?” I ask, my voice low and nervous again. “I mean, I thought you wanted to?”

“I didn’t change my mind,” he says immediately, shaking his head. “I want to, I just…”

“What?” I cut him off.

“I really want to,” he says. “I just… Addie, you’re drunk and I’m not completely sure that I’m not a little drunk, too.”

“So what?” I counter. “I thought people had drunk sex all the time?”

“Yeah, they do, I just…” he starts, nodding slightly as he looks back down at my body. “Fuck! Addie, why’d you have to take your pants off?”

“How are we supposed to have sex if I don’t take them off?”

“We can’t,” he argues, letting out a groan as he moves off of me. “We can’t do this while we’re drunk, babe.”

“Why not?”

“Because I don’t want you to regret it tomorrow, Addie,” he says, sitting back on his heels and rubbing his palms over his eyes. “I can’t take advantage of you.”

“You’re not taking advantage of me,” I argue. “How is it taking advantage if I’m telling you I want it, Zeke? Why the hell do you think I wanted to play drunk Battleship?”

“You planned that?” he snorts, his eyes dancing in amusement.

“Yes!” I shout. “I was nervous and I didn’t know what the hell I was doing!”

“Oh my God,” he says, struggling to suppress his quiet laughter. “Addie…”

“And now I’ve thrown myself at you and you’re turning me down like a total douchebag!” I accuse, moving my hands to hide my face. “God, I feel so stupid…”

Struggling to hold it together, I fight the tears of humiliation burning behind my eyes. Seeing it, Zeke pulls my hand away from my face and moves my chin to face him.

“Hey, look at me,” he says quietly, his voice still distorted. “Don’t do that.”

“I’m not doing anything,” I argue, knowing he’ll see through me but too proud to admit he’s right.

“You don’t have any reason to feel stupid, baby,” he says, the endearment warming me as he begins wiping my tears. “If you think I don’t want to have sex with you, you’re crazy, but you’re not stupid.”

“I don’t understand, Zeke. I’m not even that drunk,” I lie, stumbling over my words, pulling a look of disbelief from him. “Okay, maybe I am, but I knew I wanted to do this before I got that way. I only drank because I was nervous.”

“Addie, you shouldn’t have to drink to do this,” he argues. “If you really wanted this, it wouldn’t have taken seven shots to get your there.”

“Don’t tell me what I want,” I argue, shaking my head. “I know what I want, I know what I’m doing, Zeke.”

“Okay,” he nods, holding my eyes. “Do you know
why
you’re doing it, Addie?”

“What?”

“Why do you want to have sex with me?”

As I run my eyes over him, I have a surprising moment of lucidness as I make my confession.

“Look, I have no idea what’s going to happen once we go to school. Maybe it will all work out and we’ll get through the next four years fine. Maybe both of us will get a job somewhere cool like Atlanta and we’ll move in together and everything will be perfect,” I start, my eyes heavy. “But what if it’s not? What if we’re wrong and this whole summer is just some crazy shit we did once? What if one of us wakes up in a month, realizes it’s too hard and decides to call the whole thing off?”

“Do you really think that’s what’s gonna happen?” he asks, his voice low.

“No… I don’t know, Zeke,” I confess, giving him a slight shrug. “But I know how I feel about you right now. And I know I don’t want to go to college a virgin and end up giving it up to some random guy,” I tell him. “If everything works out fine, then the fact that we were drinking won’t matter in ten years, but if there’s even a shot that it won’t, I don’t want anyone else to have it.”

“I don’t want anyone else to have it either,” he admits, brushing the hair away from my face. “But I can’t take it while we’re drunk, babe. It’s not right.”

Knowing I’ve hit a brick wall, I nod slowly and move myself out from under him with a sigh. Humiliation and rejection course through me like wildfire as I pull my tank top back over my chest and move to stand up.

“Addie…” he starts, but I shake my head and cut him off.

“I’ll be back.”

“Addie, I’m sorry,” he offers as I stumble toward the door. “I’m not saying we can’t, I just…”

“I’m fine,” I cut him off again, steadying myself with the help of the wall and hating the lie. “I just need a minute.”

As I pull the door shut behind me, the tears threaten as I make my way to the bathroom. Shutting myself in, I twist the knobs in the shower on and after pulling my clothes off, I step inside and savor in the comfort of the hot water falling over my skin.

If it wasn’t for the tight feeling in my chest, I may not have even felt the tears falling down my cheeks.