Authors: Nancy Adams
So Close
A routine convey. Except it wasn’t so routine. ISIS kept the main transportation routes littered with IEDs, direct routes were no longer direct and were increasingly difficult to come by.
They had mobilized from Contingency Operating Base, just south of Nasiriya, the last known city that had successfully managed the last convoy of American soldiers exiting the “War or Terrorism” from 2011. Compared to the numbers that had been deploying back in those years, only a small handful had remained, undercover as trainers and supervisors.
That cover had been blown with the rise of ISIS and they were working hard at protecting civilians and any military intel left. Adam’s unit had deployed quietly in 2014 as relief aid and workers for the group currently holding the fort in Iraq.
That was all a lie. Al Taqqadum was a weak Iraqi base in Anbar Province, the town of Habbaniya. For the past month they had been training new recruits, drilling and redrilling. Training, training, training. The Iraqi forces were terrible. They sucked, but they couldn’t stop and think about that. They had to teach their recruits how to hold formations and carry out drills under fire.
Their main facilities had come close to being overrun a week before and now they needed to relocate a quarter of the defenses. That’s where they were now. Stuck on route from Habbaniya to Haditha. There was an ISIS controlled town between them, but their convoy went a day and a half journey around to avoid detection and sight.
A three day’s trip is all it should have been, but they were attached at dawn on the second day. There was no telling how many would survive, how many had attacked them, or how many more were lying in wait.
Two vehicles lay smoldering in front of them, hollowed out and seared opened from the armor piercing rounds of their enemies. They had been hit first with rockets. Always rockets first. It caused the panic and confusion. The surprise and fear.
Airborne fire seemed to dissipate after that, but Adam knew there were still ground units moving in on what remained from the initial assault. Movement caught Adam’s attention to the left. He turned and looked. It was the squad leader of Marines he led, a fireteam group of seven. They were intact but missing their heavy gunner.
Private First Class Holdt was his name. He was gone. Bundt had stepped in to take his place. They had the 50 cal and Corporal Ryans had the ammo. They just needed a flat surface away from the fire to set up shot and then they could mow down any opposition coming to take their spoils.
Garowsky was the squad leader, a Sergeant. His hand and arm movements were sharp. He had a good eye and a keen sense of direction under fire. There were ten gunmen, Garowsky motioned with a quick flick of his hands and arms. There had been twelve, but initial retaliation had killed two. Only two. Ten men had killed a quarter of the convoy? That just wasn’t going to do.
Another man leaned forward from the disabled tank they took cover behind. He pointed behind Adam’s head. The small squad was closing in on the untouched vehicles behind the hurting fireteam of Marines. Adam looked over the small team with fatigue. They looked bad. If they could move to a vehicle with less cover, they’d have the shot they’d need to take the enemies out. Behind them were more green Iraqi troops. They didn’t stand a chance. Their ammo was short and the shots were becoming less and less. They didn’t have much time to change the tables before everything was lost.
~*~
Adam’s body jolted and jerked with rigid movements as he gasped and blinked awake. He reached for his weapon, the M2 A4 service rifle, that had been lying beneath him and froze. The surroundings came into focus a blink later. Greens, browns, and dull dust swirled around his head.
He wasn’t in the ambushed convoy anymore. That was two months ago. He took a scratchy palm and ran it over his face with a choked and stifled chortle. There was no doubt about it. He had PTSD bad. They all did. Seeing that many dead on their last convoy did things to you, but only when you slept.
Pushing himself up, he dropped his legs over the low lying cot and barely winced when the pain from his legs striking the ground washed over his body. The pain was the only thing that kept him going now. It was the only way he knew he was still alive.
Pinching at his skin, Adam turned the plastic watch on his wrist. He twisted it towards his face and stared at the digital numbers displayed: 0453.
He hadn’t even slept four hours. Last night, it was just over three before the same memory jolted him awake. He had survived, but five in his team did not. He had been given another team. They respected him. He was their Captain, and a damned good one at that, but he couldn’t forget the look of Garowsky and Ryans. He couldn’t forget the guilt he felt when he realized he was happy that he was still going to be going home. Was that right? Ryans had a family. Garowsky too.
They all did.
And if they didn’t have a wife, they had a sister or brother, a girlfriend or a mom and dad they supported. Each life was important, and worth so much more than their life insurance policy. Money couldn’t replace them and it was a poor substitute. It was times like these when he came face to face with just how unfair the world really was. Then again, he had his own daughter and wife waiting for him back at home. Maybe it was fair enough for him.
With another cough, he managed to blink the residual feelings from the recurring nightmare and pulled himself from the cot. He needed to move quickly. He had a briefing with the Company Commander at ten and a date with his wife at nine. He wanted to look sharp, refreshed, and like the tour really wasn’t taking the toll that it was on his body and mind.
~*~
“You see Daddy?” He heard his wife’s lovely voice first. The sound tugged at his heart and made it ache. The picture on the webcam was fuzzy. It was always fuzzy, filled with static, and close to shutting off. He cursed beneath his breath.
“Daddy!” He saw grubbing fingers reaching for the cam. His wife swatted at the little girl’s hand playfully.
“If you cover up the camera, sweetie, Daddy can’t see you,” Adam said, grinning widely. Tears pricked at his eyes. They always did. He had seen the last year of his daughter’s life behind a screen and still, he knew he was missing volumes. No amount of emails with updates, milestones, and pictures would help get that ground back. Her vocabulary was growing by leaps and bounds—her hair too. It still wasn’t down to her shoulders, but it was getting there. In the meantime, it sat like fluffed feathers on her head.
Adam’s warning was enough to make the small girl pull her hand back. She did so excitedly with a devilish grin that melted his heart.
“I see you, Daddy. Guess what we did today?”
“What baby?”
“We went to Chile.” Off the camera, he heard his wife’s beautiful laughter. She dipped her face into the focus of the camera and grinned. The sight took his breath away. She had mid-length hair that curled slightly at the edges and beautiful, plump lips. Her dark blue eyes only made her smile jump at him and steal his breath.
“She means Chick-Fil-A,” she corrected quickly; and just like that, she was gone, out of the shot so that his daughter could get the one-on-one time. He frowned.
“Wait, come on back, sweetie—.
“Um, scuze me,” his daughter waved her hand in the camera, “Daddy, look at me. Are you listening?”
He heard his wife giggling in the background. It had to be a female thing, demanding attention like that. With a pout, he forced his eyes to his daughter’s and grinned. Her face brightened.
“When you come home, where are you going to take me?”
“Did you have something in mind, Ruthie?” Adam asked, chuckling. Sometimes, he couldn’t even believe his daughter was just three.
“The Bebberblades,” she answered back promptly. At this, his wife’s laughter turned to cackling. She appeared in front of the camera again.
“Everglades,” she whispered. He caught a better look at her this time. She was wearing lipstick, something deep and red. He would have given anything to kiss those lips. In an instant, she was gone again.
“Hey, Sarah,” Adam called, “come back—.”
“Da—dee!” Ruth whined, “Talk to me. I want to see the gators in the Bebberblades.”
Adam couldn’t help but smile. “The gators, eh? Who told you about them?”
“A moobee,” Ruth said with pride. Adam laughed out loud. He could think of nothing sweeter than the sound of his daughter’s mispronounced words…well, maybe one or two things sweeter than that.
“I’ll take you then,” Adam said quickly. As he said it, he knew he meant it.
Sarah’s head dipped back into view. Her smile was gone.
“Adam, don’t do that,” she warned.
He grinned. “Do what? I mean it. We’ll go to the Everglades. Stay a week. You know I have the leave.”
Sarah’s forehead creased. “Adam, please.”
She didn’t think he was serious. Adam turned to Ruth and held her gaze firmly. “I promise,” he said firmly.
Ruth turned to her mother and gave her a huge hug. “We’re going to the Bebberglades!”
The concern and worry melted from Sarah’s face as she held her daughter. She kissed her forehead, and then cradled her head in another hug. When her eyes met Adam’s, the smile slowly faded.
“Okay, you know what time it is, right?”
Ruth frowned. “Mommy and Daddy time,” she huffed.
Adam chuckled. “That’s right, baby girl. I’ll see you again later.” Another grin surpassed Ruth’s smile at her father’s words.
“Can you wait in your bed for me?” Sarah asked. “I’ll come read you a book and then we can say our prayers when I’m done talking to Daddy.”
“Can I come back and say goodbye?” Ruth asked hopefully.
“Of course you can,” Adam said quickly. Sarah smiled and nodded at her husband’s answer. With another kiss, she lowered Ruth from the chair and watched the short toddler stalk away. She was pretty advanced for her age, with her speech and body movements. Adam couldn’t believe how grown she seemed, so in control of her own body and mind.
Silence settled over the video feed and at length, he met his wife’s gorgeous blue eyes. He wasn’t sure what time it was South Carolina, but he knew it was late. He couldn’t tell by looking at his wife’s face, though. She looked stunning every time they spoke on the phone. She did that on purpose, always giving him her best. It could have been midnight thirty and he would never be able to tell by the look on his wife’s face. He saw something different this time. It was anger.
“Why would you promise her that?”
“Because I meant it,” Adam said quickly.
Sarah pressed her lips together. He watched her enlarged eyes inspect his face over the video screen.
“How much leave are they going to give you?”
“I’ve got two weeks, but,” Adam paused and looked down at his hand. He never wore his wedding band while in the field anymore. It was a hazard that could cost him his finger if he wasn’t careful. Instead, he kept them in his right breast pocket. It was in his hand now, his right hand. He turned it over in his palm and took a deep breath. He hadn’t been sure if he was going to wait to tell Sarah about his plans, but now it seemed that he had already stumbled onto the situation.
“Has the CO talked to you about reenlistment?”
Adam nodded. “He has. But doing so would almost guarantee another tour here. It’s not even close to cooling down,” he saw the concern on his wife’s face.
“They’re still making their extraction points, right?”
Adam nodded eagerly. They had to. The moment an exit became unsafe meant all other exits would be postponed indefinitely. It also meant increased security on US soil and their foreign bases. Anyone recently rotated home would likely be reselected for deployment within six months. It meant everyone was screwed. If they could get the last set of troops out before it got to that point, they might be able to salvage the dangerous business of being overseas in the hottest combat zone.
“So…have your exit details changed at all?”
Adam shook his head. “Still happening in a week, baby,” he forced a grin. “I’m still coming home.”
“But can you promise that?”
Adam sighed. Not anymore than he could really promise his daughter a trip to the Everglades at this point. That was why Sarah was so upset.
“Listen,” Adam said, changing the topic quickly. “I’ve been thinking about my reenlistment.”
Sarah frowned and looked away. “Please, maybe another time. When you come back—.”
“No,” Adam insisted, “I’m not gonna reup.”
Sarah’s mouth fell. That was the argument they had been having for the last two years of their marriage, having only been married for just a bit over five. Being a Marine had been a dream to him. He graduated from Annapolis too. He wasn’t a push over; but getting the highly decorated military career just wasn’t worth missing years of his daughter’s life. He realized that—just now, when he saw his daughter talk about gators. When did she even learn about what gators were? And then where they lived? When did that happen? He wanted to be there to teach her that. He wanted to teach her how to fish.
“But,” Sarah stuttered, and Adam only shook his head.
“You heard me,” he said quickly. He thought of the firefight he was in two months ago. That could have just as easily been him, but it wasn’t. He couldn’t keep misusing his luck like that.