Authors: Melody Carlson
What Matters Most (21 page)
So I confessed my insecurities, voicing my doubts as to whether I really even had a home anymore. Kim just laughed.
“You should’ve heard Dad.” We made our way through the parking garage. “As soon as I got home from the grocery store, he told me you were coming home—and he was totally happy. We both were.”
“Really?” I tried to absorb this. “He’s not disappointed that I quit the band?”
“He said he was a little worried at first, but then he told me how you said it didn’t feel right for you, and we both agreed
that you’d know best, Maya. And selfishly, we’re glad to have you back.”
“Seriously?”
“Absolutely. The truth is, I’ve worried about him being alone. And I know his housekeeping’s not that great. Not that we expect you to—”
“I love helping out,” I told her. And it was true. In fact, I was even looking forward to it.
She chuckled. “Dad was worried that you might not be pleased with the recycling center. He kind of let things go.”
“I’ll fix it for him,” I assured her.
“That’s what I told him.”
It turned out that what Kim had said was true. To my pleasant surprise, Uncle Allen was truly happy to have me home again, and yes, the recycling center was a mess.
Another thing surprised me. Kim had already made plans for Christmas Day. She’d invited Marissa and her dad for Christmas dinner. “And Shannon too,” she said quietly. “I hope you don’t mind.”
I sort of shrugged. “That was thoughtful of you,” I said somewhat stiffly. “I’m sure they appreciate it.”
“But I didn’t know you were coming,” she admitted. “And I can’t exactly uninvite them.”
“No, of course not,” I said. “Really, it’ll be great to see Marissa.”
“She’s doing pretty well,” Kim assured me. “I was really impressed when I saw her at youth group last weekend.”
“She’s still going?”
“Absolutely.” Kim grinned. “And Shannon is still going to church.”
“Still?” This was news to me.
“Marissa kind of forced her to go at first. But according to Caitlin, all three of them have been going steadily. And…” Kim got a funny look. “Well, I’m not sure if I’m supposed to say anything. It was Marissa who told me…but your mom is getting counseling.”
“Seriously?”
Kim nodded. “Now don’t expect a miraculous transformation, Maya. But I do think she’s changing some.”
And I have to agree with my cousin. When I saw Shannon, after less than two months of being apart, she
did
seem different. Oh, she’s still Shannon, for sure. And she still sticks her foot in her mouth (without even realizing it), and she’s still self-centered. But something in her is different too. I noticed it most of all when I observed her interacting with Marissa on Christmas Day. And she didn’t even know I was watching.
Marissa’s hair has grown out some, but she doesn’t like how it looks. Consequently, she had on an old ski hat that wasn’t terribly becoming. I just happened to be going down the hallway when I noticed Shannon and Marissa in the bathroom with the door slightly ajar.
“If you’re too hot, just take the hat off,” Shannon was telling her. “No one cares what you look like.”
“I care,” Marissa shot back at her.
“Here,” Shannon said. “Let me help you.”
This is when I peeked in. To be honest, I imagined my mother snatching Marissa’s knit hat and flushing it down the john. Extreme, I know, but then I also know Shannon. But to my surprise, Shannon began helping Marissa with her hair.
“I actually like your hair,” she told Marissa as she used water to sculpt her short brown hair into kind of a spiky do. “How’s that?”
Now Marissa smiled. “Okay.”
“See, it’s like I keep telling you,” Shannon said. “You’re a very pretty girl.”
“Thanks.”
“Not as pretty as me,” Shannon teased. She pressed her way in front of the mirror and daubed on lipstick. Marissa just laughed.
Okay, I’ll admit that I felt a tiny wave of jealousy to see my own mother acting more maternal toward Marissa than she’s ever been toward me. But it also struck me that Marissa is a lot more needy (since her injury) than I have ever been in my whole life. And maybe if I hadn’t been such a strong person… maybe Shannon would’ve tried harder to mother me. Or not. Mostly, I thank God that He made me like He did. I know it’s what I needed to survive.
Here’s what else I know. I know that the secret desire of my heart was to come home and live a somewhat normal life. I just needed that. I realize everyone’s normal is different, but my normal includes family and friends, and I need them around me.
And I need to go to a regular school and do regular things—like attending ball games and dances and just hanging with friends. I also need to go to church and youth group and to meet with Caitlin.
I basically just need normal
.
Most of all I need God—and I realize now that God is what makes my life normal. He is my normal. And that’s what matters most.
Maya’s Green Tip for the Day
Once again I have to say that God
is the Great Recycler
. Not only has He salvaged my life, but I see His healing hand on others as well. And I’m finding that people I had almost given up on—people like Marissa and Shannon—can be renewed, reused, and recycled by God. He takes our messes and turns them Into something usable. He salvages our wasted resources and recycles them into something full of life. And He wants to do the same for you. He wants to make you new and whole and useful. Just let Him!
Early in the story Maya gets bullied by Vanessa. Have you ever been a victim of bullying? Or have you ever been a bully? Explain the circumstances.
Why do you think Vanessa feels so threatened by Maya? If you were Maya, how would you handle it?
In this book Maya begins to explore her musical talent. Do you have some hidden talent or something you want to try? Does something hold you back? Explain.
Maya continues to meet with and be mentored by Caitlin. Do you think mentoring is helpful? Describe why or why not.
A girl named Siobhan has a history that is put down by some of her peers, and yet Maya is determined to reach out to this girl. How would you react to a situation like this?
Maya’s mother, Shannon, is back, and Maya knows that God wants her to respect her parents—but how is that possible? How would you advise someone in Maya’s shoes?
Were you surprised when Maya was invited to replace Laura in Redemption? Do you think Maya made the right choice to join the band? Why or why not?
As leader of the band, Chloe really respects Maya’s talents, and yet she becomes jealous. Why do you think that is? What do you do when you feel jealous? Explain.
More than anything, Maya decides she just wants a normal life. Explain what you think normal is and what you think Maya is really looking for. Would you describe your own life as normal?
What matters most to Maya is living her life for God. What matters most to you?
D
ear Reader,
I hope you enjoyed this sixteenth and final book in the Diary of a Teenage Girl series. I’ve really enjoyed writing them—it’s been fun getting to know the characters. And I have to admit it’s a little sad to bring it to an end.
Because this was the last book, I did something a bit different. I decided to surprise you by introducing a character who is
not
fictional. Can you guess who it was?
Anna Gilbert
is a real person! Not only is Anna the real deal, but she reminds me of some of the Diary characters. Like Caitlin (in the first Diaries), Anna has a tight relationship with God. And like Chloe and Maya, Anna is musically gifted. In fact, the lyrics I’ve used in this book are Anna’s creation. And if you like her lyrics, you should hear the girl sing!
Anna is a singer and songwriter currently living in Nashville, where she’s working on her third CD with Grammy Award-winning producer Charlie Peacock. (Peacock has produced Switchfoot, Warren Barfield, Sara Groves, Amy Grant, and many other great artists.) Her brand-new CD released in spring 2009 and is available for purchase online. Anna’s first two CDs are titled
Falling in a Beautiful Place
and
God Sees
, and they are available on iTunes and
http://cdbaby.com
.
If you’d like to connect with Anna, you can find her at
www.myspace.com/annagilbert
as well as on
Facebook.com
(just do a search for “Anna Gilbert”). She would love to hear from you!
On a final note, thanks for reading the Diary of a Teenage Girl series! If you want to find out more about what I’m doing, go to my Web site,
http://melodycarlson.com
, or look me up on Facebook.
Blessings!
Melody Carlson
W
HAT
M
ATTERS
M
OST
P
UBLISHED BY
M
ULTNOMAH
B
OOKS
12265 Oracle Boulevard, Suite 200
Colorado Springs, Colorado 80921
Scripture quotations are taken from the Contemporary English Version. Copyright © 1991, 1992, 1995 by American Bible Society. Used by permission. Scripture quotation is from Matthew 10:34–39.
With the exception of Anna Gilbert, the characters and events in this book are fictional, and any resemblance to actual persons or events is coincidental.
Copyright © 2009 by Carlson Management Co. Inc.
Lyrics of “Myself,” “Give a Little,” and “Having a Breakdown” copyright © 2007 by
Anna Gilbert. Used by permission.
Photo of Anna Gilbert by Kekoa Paakaula. Used by permission.
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying and recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the publisher.
Published in the United States by WaterBrook Multnomah, an imprint of the Crown Publishing Group, a division of Random House Inc., New York.
M
ULTNOMAH
and its mountain colophon are registered trademarks of Random House Inc.
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Carlson, Melody.
What matters most : a novel / Melody Carlson.—1st ed.
p. cm.—(Diary of a teenage girl. Maya ; bk. #3)
Summary: Sixteen-year-old Maya’s commitment to live her life for God wavers
after she joins a Christian rock band.
eISBN: 978-1-60142-255-2 [1. Christian
life—Fiction. 2. Interpersonal relations—Fiction. 3. Rock groups—Fiction. 4.
Diaries—Fiction.] I. Title.
PZ7.C216637Wg 2009
[Fic]—dc22
2009015106
v3.0