Maureen shook her head. ‘I noticed the change in atmosphere between you and him from that time onwards. Your awkwardness, his comments, it was obvious. No one else clocked it, only me. Call it mother’s intuition.’
Maria carried on. ‘Obviously, when I got with James, I never said anything. One night James came home and I swear he knew, so to stop him confronting me, I blurted out that I was pregnant. I wasn’t lying – it was true, as I’d just found out that I was pregnant with Tara.’
Maureen smiled, ‘Why are you tellin’ me this now, Maria?’
Maria downed the rest of her drink and averted her eyes once more. ‘Over the years Tommy has been a bastard to me, he could never let sleeping dogs lie and has many a time threatened to tell James. Anyway, a few months back, James was away on a business trip and I was in the house alone. There was a knock at the door and I was expecting some friends, so I thought they’d arrived early. To cut a long story short, it was Tommy, he was out of his nut on drink and drugs and he barged his way in. He kept rambling on about me insulting him at Susan’s funeral and getting his own back. Then he, he –’
As Maria started to cry, Maureen moved seats and sat next to her. She put her arm around her shoulder. ‘Ssh, now come on. None of this is your fault, Maria. What did he do to you?’
‘He raped me,’ Maria sobbed. ‘And now I’m pregnant and I don’t know who the father is.’
Maureen felt as sick as a dog as she tried to comfort her distressed daughter-in-law. What the hell had she done so wrong in raising her kids? How could anyone have raised such a fucking animal?
Maureen’s first thought was for James. This would break his heart and he must never, ever find out. ‘Does anyone else know, Maria? And I mean anyone? Have you told your mum?’
Maria shook her head, ‘James knows there’s something wrong, but I’ve been blaming my hormones. He’s not stupid though, Maur, I’m sure he’s got his suspicions. I wish I’d have come clean with him all those years ago, I should have told him about Tommy then. Keeping it a secret was a stupid idea, it’s fucked my life up and now I can’t say anything.’
Maureen stood up. ‘You can never tell James, Maria, not now, not ever. Now, I’m gonna get us another drink and between us we’ll sort this out. Everything will be all right, darling, I promise you.’
As Maureen walked back from the bar, Maria gratefully snatched the glass of wine.
‘What am I gonna do about the baby? James is so excited and all I can do is pray for a miscarriage. Please don’t think badly of me, but I’ve been secretly drinking every day while James is at work, hoping that I’ll lose it.’
Maureen felt like crying herself, but what use was that? Drumming up some inner strength, she spoke firmly, but calmly.
‘Maria, listen to me. Firstly you have to stop the drinking. If you don’t, you might cause the baby to have disabilities and that’s not the answer to anything. Now, had you and James been trying for a baby when you fell?’
Maria nodded. ‘Up until Tommy attacked me, we’d been trying for months, but the hospital reckon I’m about thirteen weeks gone and that’s around the same time he raped me.’
‘Look, I know this is hard, but you have to think positive, Maria. These hospitals always get the dates wrong and chances are the baby belongs to James.’
‘Do you really think so?’ Maria asked. A glimmer of hope was vital for her.
‘Definitely,’ Maureen insisted.
Maria grabbed her hand. ‘What am I gonna do about Tommy? When he finds out about the baby, he’ll put two and two together and make mine and James’s life a misery.’
Maureen slammed her fist onto the table. ‘Over my dead body he will. You leave Tommy to me – I’ll sort him out, I promise you. And may God be my judge, when I’ve done what I’ve got to do, he will never bother you or James, or interfere in your lives ever again.’
FORTY-THREE
After a sleepless night, Maureen made the decision to go and see Tommy first thing the following morning. Asking Johnny if he’d stay in to look after Ethel, she got washed and dressed, then ordered a cab.
‘Where you off to? You never use cabs. What’s goin’ on?’ Ethel quizzed her.
Usually, Maureen told her mother-in-law everything, but not this time. With James’s happiness at stake, the fewer people who knew, the better.
‘I’ve got an appointment at the hospital to have some tests done,’ Maureen fibbed.
The fact that she actually had an appointment booked for a few weeks’ time made her feel much better than usual about lying.
‘Why don’t you let me come with you? We can get a black cab for nothing if I come: they can swipe me card,’ Ethel offered.
Maureen shook her head. ‘Thanks, Mum, but I really need to do this alone.’
The journey to Tommy’s seemed to take for ever and gave Maureen plenty of time to think about what she was going to say. She just hoped he was in; phoning him may have pre-warned him and she couldn’t take that chance.
As the cab pulled into his turning, she asked if the driver would wait a minute. ‘I’ll pay you now, but will you just wait while I see if my son’s at home. If not, you’ll have to take me back.’
The driver grunted. Miserable bastard, Maureen thought, as she slammed the door.
Never an early riser, Tommy was still fast asleep in bed. ‘Who the fuck’s this?’ he muttered, as the constant pressing of the bell woke him up.
Seeing it was only 9 a.m., he cautiously looked out of the window. Alfie was at his mate’s and no one ever came to the house at this sorry hour.
Maureen looked up as she heard a noise. ‘It’s me, Tommy. Open the bloody door.’
One glance at her face told Tommy all he needed to know. She’d found out; she knew what he’d done. He chucked on a pair of shorts, ran down the stairs and let her in.
‘All right, Mum? Wanna cup of tea?’
Maureen looked at him with hatred. With all her might, she pushed him towards the lounge.
‘Fuck the tea. Me and you need to have a little chat, son.’
James opened his eyes to the sound of the drums being played. He picked up his mobile and rang Freddie.
‘I’m sorry, mate, I never heard the alarm go off. Do you mind if we take a day off? I had a row with Maria yesterday and I got really pissed last night.’
Freddie didn’t mind at all. ‘That’s fine by me. It’ll be nice to spend a bit of time with Sarah; she barely sees me these days.’
James ended the call and put the quilt back over his head. He and Maria used to be happy – where had it all gone so wrong?
After dropping the girls off at school, Maria decided to skip the gym in favour of her husband. James hadn’t gone to work and she had some serious grovelling to do. Talking to Maureen last night had made her feel much better already. It was a relief to share her burden with someone and be told that everything would be OK.
Stopping at Tesco Express, she bought a crusty loaf, bacon and eggs. Poor James, she loved him so much. Breakfast in bed was no apology for the way she’d been treating him, but it was a start. They could spend a nice day together, get things back on track. As Maureen said, the baby more than likely belonged to James and she had to think positive from now on.
Like a ferret stuck in a hole, Tommy twisted and turned, desperate to wriggle his way out of the accusation.
‘Maria’s an old slag, she was well up for it, Mum.’
That particular comment tipped Maureen over the edge, and she walloped him fiercely around his smarmy face. ‘Don’t you dare tell lies like that, you nasty no-good bastard. And so what if you slept with her years ago, it doesn’t give you the right to rape her twenty years on, does it? How could you do it, Tommy, eh? How could you attack your brother’s wife, of all people? What you did is the ultimate fucking betrayal.’
Tommy averted his eyes and stared at the carpet. He felt like a naughty schoolboy all over again.
‘Look, Mum, I am sorry for what I’ve done, but you don’t know the half of it. Ever since I first shagged her, she’s been a right cunt to me. The gyp she’s given me over the years, you wouldn’t believe. She’s –’
‘Shut the fuck up, Tommy. I’ve listened to enough of your drivel to last me a lifetime and now I want you to listen to me. You have to move away from here, the sooner the better. In fact, I’ll give you a deadline: next Monday. By then I expect you to be hundreds of miles away and if you’re not, then I will personally make sure that the shit hits the fan.’
Tommy looked at her in amazement. She was having a giggle, right? Realising that she wasn’t, he sort of fell onto the armchair, laughing.
‘You’re a comedian, Mum. What’s got into you? Where the fuck am I meant to go?’
Maureen stared defiantly into his piss-taking eyes. ‘I don’t know and I don’t fuckin’ care. That’s your problem, and you should of thought of that before you attacked that poor girl. You’re a betrayer, Tommy, and I want you as far away from James and Maria as possible.’
Tommy suddenly felt angry; she always stuck up for James. Well, fuck Mummy’s blue-eyed boy and fuck her. He, Tommy Hutton, being run out of town by his own mother. Who did she think she was? Violet fucking Kray?’
He stood up and flashed her his best sneer. ‘Get out of my house, Mum, and don’t you ever come back. As for your stupid idea, forget it. I’m goin’ nowhere.’
As he none too gently pushed her towards the door, Maureen pleaded with him to change his mind.
‘Tommy, I beg you to do this for me. You have to, else you’re gonna get hurt.’
As Tommy gave her a final shove, she caught her foot and landed arse up on the pavement.
‘Get hurt! Yeah, right, by you and who’s army? Goodbye, Mum, I’ll see you in another life.’
As the front door slammed, Maureen lay still on the ground. Why would he never listen to her? The stupid, stupid boy. Now she had to make a decision. Did she go ahead with plan B? Or forget the whole thing? As she pictured James’s innocent face, her mind was instantly made up. She would do anything, absolutely anything, to protect her baby.
A few miles away, James was fast asleep. As the smell of good food wafted into the bedroom, he removed the quilt to see Maria smiling at him with a tray in her hand.
‘What’s all this?’ he asked suspiciously.
Maria handed him the tray and sat down beside him. ‘I just wanted to say that I’m sorry, James. I’ve been a right misery-guts lately and you really don’t deserve it.’
James put the breakfast to one side and took her in his arms. Ever since they’d been kids, she’d had a way of making him melt.
‘I love you, James, and I’m so sorry,’ Maria said repeatedly.
James stroked her hair. ‘Ssh, come on now. You ain’t gotta keep apologising, it’s not as though you’re miserable all the time, is it? If anyone’s to blame, it’s me for getting’ you up the duff in the first place,’ he joked.
As Maria clung to him, she prayed that the baby was his. Please God, make James be the father.
Freddie was sitting in Pizza Express with Sarah and the kids when the call came through.
‘Are you OK? What’s the matter, Maureen?’
She was that upset, he could barely understand her. ‘Look, we can’t talk on the phone. Give us an hour and I’ll come to you,’ he told her.
‘No,’ she said immediately. ‘The pub at the top of the road – you know the one I mean, don’t yer? I’ll meet you there. And Freddie, whatever yer do, yer mustn’t tell James.’
Freddie was bemused as he ended the call. Whatever she had to say was obviously too important to name The Bancroft or involve her son.
‘We’re gonna have to make a move, something’s come up,’ he told Sarah.
‘Oh Fred, we never get the chance to spend the day together,’ she whinged.
Freddie ignored her and grabbed his coat. Over the years Maureen had been like another mum to him and if anyone had upset her, he’d kill ’em.
Maria took her clothes off and climbed into bed.
‘What you doing?’ James joked.
It had been so long since they’d been intimate, he’d been thinking of becoming a monk. ‘Are you sure you want to?’ he asked her gently.
Feeling nervous, Maria nodded. Truth be known, she wasn’t sure if she ever wanted to do it again, but she had to. It reminded her of falling off her bike as a kid; the quicker you got back on, the better.
She winced as he entered her. ‘Are you OK?’ James whispered.
Maria smiled. ‘I’m absolutely fine.’
For the second time in a couple of days, Maureen felt like a secret service agent as she marched towards the pub. Spotting Freddie’s car, she was relieved that he was already there. She hated hanging about on street corners; it made her feel like an old Tom. As she approached, Freddie got out of the car.
‘Get back in,’ she told him. ‘Drive to a pub in an area where nobody knows us.’
Maureen was silent while Freddie headed towards Limehouse. Johnny was at home with Ethel, so there was no rush to get back.
‘You look ill, Maur. Whatever’s the matter?’ Freddie asked. She looked terrible and he was extremely concerned about her.
Maureen shook her head. ‘I need a couple of drinks before I can explain. We’ll talk in the pub, eh?’
Freddie nodded. Not knowing what else to say, he rambled on about Sarah and the kids. Driving in silence always gave him the willies.
Pulling into a sidestreet, he stopped outside a smart-looking pub. ‘This OK, Maur? It’s full of City boys and far too upper class for us to know anyone,’ he joked as he opened her door.
He ordered the drinks and found them a quiet table. As he sat opposite Maureen, his concern turned to shock. Not only did she look ill, but she’d also aged overnight. Gone was the plump, bubbly woman with the classic laugh; she’d now been replaced by a thin, serious lady, with pale skin and haunted eyes.
‘What’s goin’ on, Maur?’ he asked kindly.
Maureen left no stone unturned as she explained the story. She paused a couple of times, once to cough, once to wipe her eyes, but finally she got to the end.