Shattered (24 page)

I strolled around the downstairs, stopping in the kitchen and taking in the picture above the stove that my mom had made herself. She was so proud of her first wood working course. Even though the picture looked like an amateur had made it, she was so pleased and couldn't think of a better place to put it. I smiled then turned and walked up the stairs to meet Grayson in the shower.

I stripped out of my rain soaked clothes and stepped into the steaming hot water. Grayson had already let the water run over his head and leaned down to plant a dripping wet kiss on my lips. I held his head to mine for a few seconds longer and when we pulled away, I lay my cheek on his chest, listening to the steady beat of his heart, allowing the water to cascade over the both of us.

We stood holding onto one another for a few minutes before stepping away to wash our bodies clean. I couldn't have imagined when this day started, the emotional roller coaster that I would be pulled on, and now that I had gone through it, I was thankful for it. Grayson was right; I was tucking away a part of me out of fear and anger. I didn't want to live like that. I wanted to be whole again, and be able to give all of myself to him. His forceful intervention, albeit unwanted, was just the ticket to getting me to that point.

After rinsing shampoo from my hair, we stepped out and wrapped our bodies in warm fluffy towels. We took turns drying each other off, then I led him into my old bedroom. I searched through my drawers, looking for anything that we could wear to bed, and found a couple of my old basketball shorts that I used to wear, for us to sleep in.

"You want me to wear these?" Grayson asked, holding the shorts that I'd thrown over to him.

"They should fit you. I liked my shorts big."

I watched as Grayson slid his leg into the shorts, which were clinging to his thighs. "Snug as a bug," I said.

He looked at me unappreciatively. "Not happening. I'd prefer you in all your naked glory."

I laughed. "Hand me your clothes. I'm going to go and wash them."

Grayson handed me his jeans and shirt and I ran down to the laundry room and threw our stuff in together, making sure that we had something to wear in the morning.

When I walked back into the bedroom, Grayson was lying in the bed waiting for me. I slid in next to him and used my arm to straddle his chest as he pulled me close. We lay in comfortable silence before I broke it with a question that had been nagging at me since the cemetery.

"Grayson?"

"Yeah?"

"You said you had a girlfriend. What happened?"

I looked up at his face and he lightly smiled down on me.

"When my mom died, and I went on my downward spiral, I put everyone else in my life on the backburner for my booze and gambling." He paused, wiped his face and then continued. "Mandy and I had been together for probably two years when mom passed, and instead of letting her help me through it, I made her life miserable right along with mine. She tried numerous times to get me to get some help, but I'd just lash out and do whatever I felt like doing." He sat up and balanced his weight on his elbow. "Dallis, it wasn't uncommon for me to go to the casino and throw away a few grand every night. All while getting drunk on a fifth of vodka with people who I thought were my friends."

"Not Tommy, Patrick, and Emily, right?" I asked.

"No, they were trying just as hard as Mandy to get me to get help, but I pushed them away too. She finally had enough of it and gave me an ultimatum. I didn't choose her. She walked and never looked back."

A painful silence overcame the room as I realized just what Grayson had lost because of his inability to mourn properly. Colby and I had other issues, but Grayson's revelations put him in Mandy's place for me and I was petrified thinking he could have one day given me the ultimatum and walked, just as Mandy had done to him.

"Do you know her whereabouts now?" I asked curiously.

"Yeah. After I finally went through my grieving process courses, I contacted her and apologized for the hurt I had caused her. She had moved on with a real nice guy. She looked happy and I was happy for her. No one should have to deal with what I put her through, so to see someone doing what I was unable to do…it made me feel at peace with everything that had happened."

I watched as his blue eyes sparked with contentment. It must have been so hard for him to lose everything. I had a newfound respect for Grayson after hearing about his ordeal after his mom's death. I naively thought that she had died and he moved on to preserving her memory and making her dreams a reality. Little did I know that, Grayson had been through more than I ever cared to experience.

"What about you and jackass?" he asked, smirking as he referred to Colby.

I swallowed before answering his question. "Well, our break-up was a bit different. Colby and I have known each other since we were kids, but we didn't get together until after my dad's death." Grayson nodded his head. "After I graduated from college, I moved to Seattle and that's when we got together."

"What led to your break-up?"

"Colby wanted to be married and made no secrets about his desires. I just couldn't see myself marrying and, you know me, I made it known. He used my mom's wishes to see me married before she died as a stronghold, thinking it would persuade me. It didn't work." I smiled thinking about the next part of my story. "The night we saw you at Ada's, we were there having a night out with his friend and his friend's new fiancé. Colby grew agitated that his friend was already engaged to be married after only six months of dating, while we had been together for three years. Emily spilling the water on him was just the fuse that set off the bomb."

"He was an arrogant son of a bitch."

"Right, which was part of the reason I couldn't see myself marrying him. Later that night, we got into a big fight and he said some really nasty things to me. I kicked him out and that was the end of that."

Grayson sat and stared into my eyes before finally cracking a smile on his expressionless face. "Sorry that happened to you, but lucky for me that it did."

"I know."

Grayson kissed me with every ounce of passion that was buried inside of him. "I'm so damn thankful for everything that's happened to me. It's brought me to you."

"Same here, Scruffy," I joked, running my fingers through the hairs gracing his face.

We lay back down together, snuggling into each other as the rain began to pick up again. I fell asleep to the soothing sounds of raindrops hitting the windows and Grayson's warm breaths on the top of my head.

The birds chirping in the morning was a welcomed wake-up call as Grayson and I lay intertwined together. I opened my eyes to find a pair of sparkling blues looking down at me in admiration.

"I hurried my sleep to watch you this time," he said, smiling and planting a kiss on my lips.  

"Good to know. You hungry?" I asked, feeling the emptiness of my stomach beginning to punish me.

"Yeah. I could go for some of you… I mean, food." He smirked as I ran my fingers over his face.

"Well get up. You're getting food this morning." I smiled back at him, killing his erection.

We got dressed and made our way downstairs. I looked around the house again before leaving, and this time a warm feeling of the love that had been shared throughout all of my years in it flooded over me. I shut the door and locked it, feeling like I would be back sooner rather than later.

I took Grayson to my favorite local pancake house and introduced him to Margie, the owner who had watched me grow up. She looked surprised to see me walk in with someone other than Colby, but after introducing her to Grayson, he worked his charms on her and she showered him with compliments. As she told embarrassing stories about me as a kid, Grayson sat completely immersed in her tales, laughing wildly at parts of them at my expense. When we finished, I thanked Margie and she thanked me for coming in. She wrapped Grayson in a bear hug and made him promise to come back and see her, which he did.

When we were situated in the truck and just about to pull out, I put my hand on Grayson's thigh and smiled over at him, briefly catching him off guard. "Thank you," I said.

"For what?

"For… for saving me. I didn't want to admit it, but I needed help. Thank you for recognizing it."

He leaned over and kissed my forehead. "Anytime, babe."

He roared the truck to life and we pulled out of the parking lot and made our way back to the I-5 freeway as different people… different, whole people.

Chapter 15

On the ride back to Seattle, I designated myself D.J. Instead of my normal melancholy alternative rock, I programmed Grayson's phone to the Spice Girls Pandora station, spawning an overwhelming line-up of bubblegum pop music. After the fourth song, Grayson pleaded with me to change the station, saying he'd had enough. I changed the station to reflect more of both our personal tastes, and we enjoyed the rest of the forever long drive to Seattle, rocking out and singing loudly to the best of Nirvana.

When I stepped into my townhouse, the repeated chirping of my cell phone drew my attention to the kitchen. I had forgotten all about it and surprisingly, I didn't miss it.

Grayson stood behind me as I sifted through the numerous missed calls from Miranda. I shook my head at the ridiculous amount of calls she had made to me in the matter of a day. Grayson found it rather comical.

"You better call her. She's probably had a panic attack by now."

I lifted the phone to my ear and rolled my eyes. Miranda could be overly dramatic at times, and I had a sneaking suspicion that this was one of those occasions.

"Oh. My. Fucking. Gosh! Where have you been?" Miranda screeched, pounding my ear drums.

"You know I was gone with Grayson. What's up?"

"Are you okay? I didn't think you'd drop off the face of the planet. You had me kind of worried."

"Miranda, I'm fine. Now tell me why the hell I have a million missed calls from you."

"Exaggerator. Anyway, are you at home?"

"I sure am."

"Okay. Don't go anywhere. I'll be over in ten."

Before I could say anything further, Miranda hung up the phone. I lightly laid my phone down on the kitchen counter and turned to face Grayson. "Looks like we're about to have company."

"What's going on with Miranda?"

"I don't know. But that panic attack? You might have been right about that. She sounded like a mad woman."

"Gotta love you girls and all of your over dramatics."

"You girls? I'm so anti-dramatic that I could be emotionally classified as a dude."
Grayson raised an eyebrow and smirked. "I think I'll take a little more dramatics from you then."

I laughed as I walked over to the fridge and grabbed a couple of pops. Grayson led the way back into the living room and turned on the TV. He slunk down on the couch and pulled me down with him. I lay with my head in his lap and we watched a documentary on legendary rock musicians who had died too soon. Just as we were starting to get into it, the doorbell rang and I rose up and opened the door to a beaming Miranda.

"Hi Grayson," she said as she strolled into my home without even saying hello to me.

"Hi to you too, Miranda."

She turned to me with a smile that I was sure would crack her face in half.

"Check this shit out!" I watched as she held out her hand and a large diamond sparkler gleamed from her tiny finger. "Sean proposed. I'm officially off the market."

I leaned over and gave her a loving hug. "I'm so happy for you." I pulled back to watch the excitement in her face. "Miranda Skon getting married. Who would have ever guessed?"

"I know, right? It was driving me up the damn wall that I couldn't get in touch with you. You had to be the first person I told."

"You haven't even told your parents?" I questioned, shocked that they weren't even aware.

"Nope!" Miranda excitedly exclaimed. "You're my best friend, Dallis, and hopefully my maid of honor. You had to be the first person I told."

I couldn't hide the smile taking over my face. "Thanks, Miranda. That means a lot."

Miranda turned to Grayson who was sitting with a slight grin on his face. "You're hot as hell, Grayson, so I have no doubt you'll clean up nicely, but can you please get rid of the Scruffy McGruff before the wedding?"

Grayson rubbed his hand over his scruff and laughed. He stood and walked over to Miranda, leaning down to hug her and rubbing his face up against hers.

"Ugh. I don't know how you can stand this, Dallis," Miranda said, pushing Grayson away from her.

"Congratulations, Miranda. Tell Sean I said so as well."

"I will," she replied, moving further into the living room.

Grayson turned to me and leaned down and placed a kiss on my lips. "I've gotta get home and get changed before I have to go into Ada's." He gently grabbed my face with both of his hands and whispered, "Thanks for letting me be a part of yesterday," and then kissed me again before waving goodbye to Miranda and walking out the door.

 I shut the door and turned to Miranda, who was still grinning from ear to ear.