Secret Torment (Bend To My Will #9) (3 page)

Vivienne leaned her head against the sofa and stared up at the ceiling. She felt lost, and just so…different. It seemed that all around her love was happening, yet it was beyond her reach. She reflected on the last few days and the love that her best friend, as well as her parents, had in their lives.

All at once, it seemed that she was surrounded by people in love. Was there a message she was supposed to get from all of this? If there was, she’d missed it. All Vivienne knew was that she loved Jacob with all her heart, and he didn’t love her back. She closed her eyes, forcing back the tears.

Chapter 3

Jacob had a blind spot when it came to Vivienne, which was the only explanation for why he persisted in acting against his better judgment. From the beginning, he had overindulged on the eroticism, and like any addiction, now he couldn’t stop.

It was busier than ever at Rinaldi Imports, and Jacob had a pile of work to do. Yet he sat at his desk staring out the window like a daydreaming schoolboy. As the week went by, the playroom scene from the past weekend only grew more vivid in his mind.

Just thinking about it, Jacob got turned on. He had not known a woman like Vivienne before, and he was hooked. Despite the fact that he continued to push her limits, guiding her into bolder sexual scenes, it was Vivienne who challenged
him
.

Jacob was rattled by her ability to penetrate emotional barriers without seeming to try. It happened organically, as if indulging in sex play with Vivienne naturally led to greater intimacy. Yet if he was going to abstain, he should have done so from the beginning.

Which is exactly what he should have done…for Vivienne’s sake. Admittedly, he hadn’t been thinking of her, but only of satisfying his overpowering urges for the forbidden, pushing further with each encounter. Yet each new sizzling experience made him want more, a need that couldn’t be filled.

To continue as he was, meant following a treacherous path. For he had known from the start that Vivienne had a romantic view of the world, one he couldn’t embrace. As they hurtled forth, pulled into ever more intense erotic interludes, as if swept down by an unrelenting undercurrent, Jacob was out of his depth.

Like an alcoholic taking one drink, Jacob was on a binge without end. He knew that he wasn’t good for Vivienne for anything beyond an electrifying playroom scene, and he’d said so, many times. Yet he hadn’t listened to his own warnings.

Knowing the dangers of the road he was on, Jacob still felt his restraint slipping through his fingers. Reason hadn’t repressed his raw need, nor had it changed what he felt for Vivienne. Ill-advised though it may be, Jacob saw no way to alter his course.

Vivienne’s presence in his bedroom, and in his life, had changed him. Jacob’s ability to block out emotion had melted away, as he felt an irrepressible draw to the woman he craved. It went beyond sating his sexual need, because another woman would have been adequate for that purpose.

There was something unique about Vivienne; she was one of a kind. And that realization scared Jacob. He hadn’t needed a woman before, and had replaced one for another without a second thought. Not so anymore, as any threat of losing Vivienne was more than he could bear to consider.

At every turn, Jacob strove to possess Vivienne. Yet in doing so, the dynamic had shifted, without him aware that it was even happening. His mood darkened from thinking that it was
she
that possessed
him
. For as surely as he’d take his next breath, he would do everything in his power to keep her.

Lost in his own world, the phone ringing startled him. Pulled from his reverie, Jacob stared at it as though it was out of place. Then he snatched it from the desk to take the call, pulled back to the realities of the business world.

“Jacob here.”

“Hello, Mr. Rinaldi. This is Janice at the association.”

“Oh, yes?”

“I assume you still plan to attend the meeting tonight?”

“Of course. I’ll be there.”

“As it happens, one of our speakers has taken ill, and I wondered if I could impose. It would be very helpful if you could give a short talk. It wouldn’t have to be very long; we just need to fill about half an hour.”

“What would you like me to speak about?”

“A topic of your choice,” Janice said. “Something that will be of interest to the other importers.”

“Certainly, that shouldn’t be a problem.”

After the call, Jacob made a few notes on a current issue that would be relevant. That should do for a short talk. Then he returned to work, rapidly going through emails, and responding to anything urgent. He still had several hours before the association meeting, so devoted his time to making headway on the tasks he’d neglected earlier.

*****

The national association was a trade group to support wine importers. It published monthly and yearly statistical reports, and kept the group updated on regulations in the industry, among other things. The service was valuable, and Jacob supported it by attending meetings, as well as contributing where needed.

Conveniently, the meeting was held on one of the upper floors of a building not far from Jacob’s office. The good weather allowed for holding the event on a rooftop terrace, much nicer than being enclosed in a stuffy conference room.

Jacob was in the habit of taking Zach or Grayson with him for the monthly meetings. Since the speakers were addressing some technical issues this time, he brought Trace along instead. Having known about the meeting in advance, his friend and technical director had actually dressed in business attire, instead of the jeans and polo shirt Jacob was used to seeing him wear.

They took a taxi the few blocks to the building, then made their way through the marble lobby to the elevator. It was empty except for the two of them. “So you’re still getting on well with Vivie?”

As much as Jacob had opened up with Vivienne, he still wasn’t inclined to share his personal life, even with such a good friend. “Yes, we see each other regularly.”

Trace grinned. “For you, that’s saying a lot.”

“I didn’t say anything.” Jacob kept a straight face. “And you’re still dating Lana?”

“As much as possible.”

Jacob smiled. “That’s a first. I haven’t known you to be a one-woman guy.”

“I am now,” Trace said. “I have to tell you, I love that woman.”

The enthusiasm didn’t surprise Jacob, because that was his friend’s personality. He wasn’t one to be conservative. If he enjoyed something, he did so thoroughly. And when it came to life in general, Trace lived to the fullest. It was a marvel they were such good friends, because Trace possessed none of Jacob’s reserve.

“Love…that’s a strong word.”

The doors opened and they stepped into the elevator bay on their floor. Trace beamed. “I do love her, and I told her so. We were in Central Park, and, well…I couldn’t pass up the opportunity to tell her how I felt.”

The change in Trace was obvious, especially to Jacob, who knew him so well. He looked
happy
. And he must truly be in love, because he hadn’t dated another woman since he met Lana. Jacob wondered what that was like, to be in love.

He’d seen it with others who claimed to feel the giddiness it inspired. The condition seemed to overtake the unsuspecting, as if no one could control who they fell in love with. The whole thing unnerved Jacob, particularly the lack of control.

He much preferred his lifestyle, and a relationship that required the woman to obey him. Jacob’s dominant nature drew him to that dynamic. Yet hearing Trace’s confession of love, and seeing the tenderhearted emotion his friend made no effort to hide, ruffled Jacob’s composure.

“Okay, let’s get this party started,” Trace said, heading for the rooftop terrace.

The association meeting was well attended, and many business associates were already drinking, talking, and laughing. Jacob headed to the bar for a bourbon, while Trace engaged in conversation with a techie from another company.

Jacob spent his time connecting with those he knew in the industry. The meeting provided a good opportunity to catch up with them, as well as hear the industry news. Often he learned more on a personal basis than he did from the speakers. Rumors spread before the information made it to the larger platforms, so it paid to make friends and share the current scoop.

Across the terrace, Sam Williamson sat with one of his employees, intent on the conversation. If Jacob got a chance he’d say hello later on. By the time the speakers started, Jacob was on his second bourbon. His talk was on how rapidly technology was affecting the wine-importing business, a subject he understood well.

He was at a table with Trace and a couple of other buddies, tasting the appetizers, when he spotted Daniel Kenyon sitting next to his stepfather. It made sense for the guy to be at the meeting, considering that he worked in the industry. Yet he seemed out of his element.

Daniel Kenyon wore a navy suit that fit a bit snugly, giving the impression of some mafia boss. He had dark hair that he kept very short, adding to his unfriendly appearance. There was no air of camaraderie to him. Instead, he was stiff and formal, in a group where the rest of the men worked toward mutual cooperation.

When it was Jacob’s turn at the podium, he put his jacket back on and walked to the front. It wasn’t the first time he’d given a talk, and was comfortable doing so, as he knew most of the audience. However, Daniel’s glare was difficult to miss.

Jacob ignored him, unconcerned about what Daniel thought. It didn’t matter, so Jacob focused on the topic at hand. He hit on some key points, issues he didn’t think the group was aware of, but which were important.

Halfway through his talk, he noticed Daniel shifting in his chair. It was a bit distracting, but Jacob continued. He launched into the second half of his presentation, in which he proposed solutions to a few of the technical issues.

Daniel interrupted him, calling out when he didn’t have the floor. The negative comments caught Jacob off guard. The usual procedure was to take questions after the speech, but the annoying stepson of one of the largest importers chose to embarrass all, by speaking out of turn.

“Daniel, let me finish and then we will get to questions.”

“I don’t have
a question
,” Daniel said. His derisive tone was familiar to Jacob, as it was the way the man usually spoke. He had no respect for anyone, and seemed to think he was the king of the industry.

Jacob put up his hand to quiet Daniel, but it was ineffective.

“I’m sure anyone here can see what you’re trying to do.”

“And what is that?” Jacob was unable to hide his annoyance.

“You’re trying to pump yourself up, sound like you know more than the rest of us…just like you always do.” The smug look on Daniel’s face made Jacob want to punch him, but he was still up at the podium.

Jacob glanced over at Sam Williamson, who didn’t look up. He couldn’t blame him for wanting to turn away, probably hoping that the attendees didn’t know the asshole disrupting the meeting was his stepson. Either that, or Daniel had told him another lie, sold him a story about his suspicious actions, and made an ally of Sam once again.

The event manager stood at the table next to Daniel, leaned down, and whispered in his ear. Jacob looked away from the creep’s reddening face to continue his presentation, and save the event from falling apart. He managed to gain the crowd’s attention with the details of some fairly innovative technical methods, then ended the talk while he was ahead.

Jacob was furious about what had happened. He kept his cool long enough to get off the podium and return to his table. Since his was the last presentation, the attendees were released to go back to drinking and talking. But there was an undercurrent, and Jacob knew they all wondered what the hell had happened.

Dinner was served, and most of the guests were distracted, the disruption already forgotten. Yet the noise level remained high. Since the attendees were friends as much as business associates, the group’s conversation didn’t die down. Daniel had disappeared from his stepfather’s table, and Jacob hoped that meant he’d left.

Still fuming over the man’s arrogance and rudeness, Jacob’s blood simmered. He didn’t want to run into the guy, as he couldn’t be responsible for his actions. He carved into his steak, and was just about to take a bite when the fork flew out of his hand.

Out of the corner of his eye, Jacob saw Daniel standing next to the table, his expression challenging. Apparently, he’d tripped on his way down the aisle, bumping into Jacob’s arm. The jarring impact had thrown the fork right out of his hand. “That’s enough, asshole.”

Jacob stood up, and in one swift motion, he grabbed Daniel by the arm. The moron was all strong and mighty when he could heckle someone. But the physical was beyond him. The guy probably didn’t expect the reaction he got.

Dragging him into the hallway by the elevators, Jacob tossed him against the wall. “You need to back off, Kenyon, because I’m tempted to beat the crap out of you.”

The guy was intimidated, but did his best not to show it. Daniel straightened his jacket and stood up straight. “What? You can’t handle the truth?”

“As if you’d know the truth if it bit you in the butt.”

Daniel smirked. “I know more than you think I do. A lot more.”

“Save your veiled threats for someone who is scared of you.”

The look in Daniel’s eyes was vicious. “You should be scared, because I know you, Rinaldi.”

Jacob balled his hands into fists, and it was all he could do to hold back from creaming the smart mouth.

“I know you went to see my stepfather,” Daniel spat. “I know you tried to tell him about all the shit you think I’ve done wrong. I’m used to it, Rinaldi. You’ve always been out for me, trying to look like the
big man
.”