Secret Torment (Bend To My Will #9) (2 page)

“I’ve never…” Vivienne gasped. “I feel so full. The pressure in my ass…and the stretch of your cock…” She closed her eyes.

“I’m going to fuck you hard, baby.” Still holding her wrists behind her back, Jacob put his other palm on her belly for support, then he stroked hard. God, she felt good, so hot and tight.

Jacob panted, then growled like an animal. “Now, baby…now.” He felt her strong inner muscles pulse around his shaft just as he shot into her. With his balls tight and his muscles like steel, he poured out his cum while Vivienne convulsed around him.

When she slumped against the bed, Jacob released her hands and slipped out the plug. He pressed his lips to her bare ass, excited for what was yet to come. With Vivienne relaxed from her orgasms, she would have an easier time allowing his penetration.

So she wouldn’t tire, Jacob guided her to stretch out on her belly. He covered her with kisses on her neck, along her back, and down her thighs. Vivienne’s voice was a whisper. “That feels so good.”

The anticipation of being inside her again, in a more forbidden way, stirred Jacob’s arousal. He spoke to her tenderly. “Are you ready for me, baby?”

“Yes.” It was a mere breath from her lips, just one word, but all he needed to hear.

Jacob fisted his cock, stiffening it in his hand. The thought of shoving it in her tight ass had him fully erect. He raked his palms down Vivienne’s spine, admiring her, then massaged her firm buttocks.

“It will be good, baby. All you have to do is relax for me.”

Grabbing some lube, Jacob slathered it over her asshole to make his entry smooth. “Bend your knees,” he said, guiding her ass up to him once again.

Vivienne fisted the sheets and arched her back. The sign of her acceptance stirred the fire of his desire into a roaring blaze. Jacob poured some lube over his cock and pressed the tip against her tight asshole. He shuddered with excitement. “Just be calm, baby.”

He held Vivienne by the hips and gradually rocked forward. Inch by inch, his thick cock went deeper. Ass fucking was insanely pleasurable. Her tight channel gripped him like an iron fist massaging his rod. “Fuck…Vivienne.”

Jacob had wanted to butt-fuck her for so long; he had thought of it, envisioned it. But he had waited until the right time, until she was ready. He shoved a bit harder, until he was all the way in. Intense sensation filled his body, and his cock swelled from the pressure around it.

“Are you okay?” Jacob ground out the words, barely able to speak.

“Yes…good.” Vivienne’s gentle voice edged him closer. She was submitting in a new and very powerful way. Taking her ass was so hot, and Jacob could have come right away, yet he delayed to savor the experience.

Holding back quickly became unendurable, and the squeeze around Jacob’s cock made him want to explode. Shoving in and out, the sight of Vivienne’s naked ass and the sexy sounds she made were his undoing. He had no restraint left, and once his cock spurted, he didn’t want to stop.

Jacob came hard, pulsing with feral need. The pleasure was indescribable, making him lightheaded. He moaned in a deep voice, letting go inside her. The powerful climax lasted, until he didn’t have anything left.

Panting hard, Jacob quieted, still buried deep. He held Vivienne’s hips and began to slowly pull out. But then he went still. With his cock still plunged up her ass, Vivienne whimpered and Jacob rubbed his fingers over her clit. She came unglued, climaxing to his touch with his cock shoved into her.

It was damned erotic that his ass fucking had brought her off too. When Vivienne calmed, Jacob gently pulled out of her. He fell onto the bed and pulled her into his arms. “That was so hot.”

Vivienne put her palm on his chest. “I liked you
taking me
that way. I liked it a lot.”

So did Jacob, as the scene had been all he’d hoped for and more. He was pleased that Vivienne had enjoyed it, encouraged that she’d want to do that again. Contentment filled him as a result of taking charge and dominating as he wished.

Jacob had taken her in the way
he
desired, and Vivienne had done it for his pleasure. Her submission had not only given him the high that he sought, but had penetrated his emotional armor in an unexpected way. He closed his eyes, holding Vivienne tightly, his emotions running high.

Jacob had no better clue on how to handle romance in the playroom, but what he felt was potent. It was a deeper, and less reserved, emotion than he had known. Although he couldn’t voice the words Vivienne longed to hear, she had rocked his world. Maybe Jacob didn’t know how to fix
everything
, but he had deepened the intimacy between them in a way he understood.

Chapter 2

The weekend with Jacob had been earth-shattering. Vivienne had been so afraid of losing him, only to discover that she had no reason to worry. He had reassured her as only he could. The cruise in the harbor and dinner had been romantic.

Vivienne had avoided bringing up the issue of love, knowing she would stay with Jacob whether he made a commitment or not. The depth of feeling she had for him compelled her to be loyal, and to continue the relationship despite any defects.

No relationship was perfect, or so she told herself. And what she already had with Jacob was more than she had dreamed possible. Vivienne threw herself into being submissive, not just a role she craved, but a way to be close to Jacob.

Ironically, falling in love was more taboo than anal sex, thus she had willingly done the latter to please Jacob, without bringing up a subject to which neither had answers. She’d discovered that the forbidden act had been the pinnacle of sexual domination for her.

Even with oral sex, Vivienne retained some control over the encounter, but anal sex had been the absolute in submissive intercourse. So far that was the case for Vivienne, although she knew Jacob would continue to press soft limits and show her new ways of pleasure.

After the heated interlude in the playroom, Jacob had showered with her before bed. Vivienne had fallen asleep like a child after a hard day of play. The next thing she’d been aware of was light streaming through the window, and that it was time to wake up.

In a dreamlike state, Vivienne had said goodbye to Jacob. When she had arrived at her apartment, she’d showered and managed to get to the shop on time. The experience of the playroom, the entire weekend with Jacob, had left her shaken up, although in a good way.

Vivienne had taken on her role as submissive with fervor, and the hot interlude had been branded into her mind. Even after working all day, she hadn’t been able to get Jacob out of her thoughts, and that night had dreamed of a delicious repeat of the anal penetration.

When she woke up alone in her bed the next morning, Vivienne snuggled under the covers to luxuriate with the lingering images of the dream. As a woman, she had been taught that some things were naughty. But she was sure that she wasn’t the only woman who harbored a fantasy of being a
naughty girl
.

Yet whatever she did with Jacob was pure and good; each act was a show of love, serving to increase the intimacy between them. As a woman she knew certain things, and looking into Jacob’s eyes after the titillating experience, Vivienne had seen deep-seated emotion.

Such a raw form of sex might have been designed to please Jacob, but after the first such session Vivienne knew there would be more. She wanted to do it again, as the sensations had been riveting. Still nestled into the warmth of her bed that morning, Vivienne reached under her nightgown and put her palm on her ass.

She imagined Jacob behind her, shoving into her, and the orgasm that had followed. Vivienne rolled onto her back, letting the delicious images flood her mind. When he had penetrated her that way, his shaft had hit her G-spot at a different angle, and soon she’d been ready to explode.

The delectable pressure had built up to a soul-searing orgasm, and she’d been soaring afterward. Not that her orgasms weren’t usually mind-blowing, but that one had been more tingly and intense. It could only be described as erotic fireworks, and she wanted more of the same.

When she could drag herself out of bed, Vivienne showered and got ready for work. She still had a life to live, even if Jacob did have her heart. After dressing, she took the elevator to the lobby and stopped long enough to say hello to Jason. The doorman was glad for the attention, and greeted her cheerily. She didn’t have long, so didn’t linger.

The walk to Vee’s was invigorating, and it gave her a chance to clear her mind. It was late September and the weather was nippy, but Vivienne found the brisk air refreshing. She looked at the other pedestrians on their way to somewhere important. Each person strode with purpose, as if needing to meet a deadline and short of time. The tourists stood out, due to their relaxed stroll while gawking at the shops or restaurants.

Vivienne wondered if any of the people she observed were as happy as she was. Then she rounded the corner and spotted Vee’s. Her attention shifted to business, and all that waited for her at her desk. When she got to the door, she pulled it open with new verve and a spring in her step.

Work was therapeutic, absorbing Vivienne in another of her passions. Creating new scents had become her priority, one she devoted her skill to. With Michele running daily operations and Luke stepping up to handle more daily tasks, she could spend her time where she was most valuable.

That last time she’d walked through Central Park with Jacob, the woodsy smells had given her an idea. Vivienne played around with some combinations, testing them, and then adjusting as needed. The new fragrance was getting there, but wasn’t quite right yet.

Late in the afternoon, Vivienne went out front to chat with Michele, so she could catch up on the details of that day’s sales and customers. While her manager filled her in on some larger-ticket sales, as well as repeat business, Vivienne’s mind drifted.

It hadn’t escaped her notice that Milo hadn’t been in the shop for a while. She was glad about that, as she didn’t want any more confrontations, and her gut told her that the man might be dangerous. But that evening when she’d waited on the sidewalk for Jacob had been the last she’d seen of Milo.

When the annoying man had leered at her, Jacob had arrived just in time to challenge him. She guessed the threat had been enough to deter him, which was a good thing. It reminded her of Jacob’s possessiveness, and his inclination to protect her. It was something she no longer resisted, as it gave her a feeling of safety and of being cared for.

After hours, Vivienne went to Luciana’s Italian Restaurant, instructing the driver to park and wait for her. She often met Lana on her dinner break at her parents’ restaurant, as it gave them time to catch up. With both of them dating and busy with careers, it wasn’t that easy to get together.

It would seem that being roommates would provide opportunities to see each other, but either Vivienne was at Jacob’s or Lana was with Trace. Once inside, she went to their usual table in the back. Lana waved and came over, tossing her apron aside. Vivienne spotted her friend’s mother Luciana, but she was busy. If she had a chance she’d give her a hug on the way out.

Lana slid into the booth across from her. “You made it.”

Vivienne noticed that Lana was wearing the sterling silver locket that Trace had given her. That her friend wore the trinket every day warmed her heart. Lana had said she didn’t want to take it off, because it was special to her.

The waiter delivered the wine to the table. “I ordered Chianti. Is that okay?” Lana said.

“Of course. It reminds me of my trip to Tuscany, and I like it anyway.”

“The special tonight is lasagna. Are you up for that?”

“I’m easy. Your dad makes great lasagna.”

Vivienne broke off a piece of bread and slathered some butter on it. She was prepared for Lana to ask what was new, but she wasn’t about to tell her about her new sexual experience. Yet just thinking of it made her smile.

The wine was poured, and Lana grinned. “So how was your weekend?”

“It all worked out,” Vivienne said. “I told Jacob about how I’d thought I was pregnant, but that it had been a false alarm.”

Lana lifted her wine glass. “How did he take it?”

“Better than I thought. He told me that he would have stuck with me,” Vivienne said, rubbing her thumb over the side of her glass. “Although I’m not sure what that means, exactly.”

“He wouldn’t have dumped you, that’s what.”

“Sure, and I was relieved to find that out. But I still don’t know how he would have reacted if it had been true. And I’m no closer to knowing if he wants a permanent relationship…or a child of his own.”

Vivienne looked across the table. Her friend had the strangest look. “What? Tell me why you have that look on your face.”

Lana grinned. “He said it, Vivie.” She put her hand to her cheek. “Trace said he loves me.”

Joy for her friend was instantly muted by sadness that twisted her stomach. Vivienne didn’t want to be envious, but she couldn’t help it. Lana’s relationship with Trace was a painful reminder of all that was out of her reach with Jacob.

But she was happy for Lana. “That is amazing. Did you tell him that you love him too?”

“Of course, and he was so pleased,” Lana said. “I mean, like he really thought I might not feel the same? Come on…”

“I’m sure he could tell how you feel. You’re so close now, and you’re together so much. He’d have to know.”

“You’d think, but with guys you can’t tell.” Lana took a gulp of wine. “But now he knows for sure.”

“You look so happy.”

“I am, Vivie. I’m very happy.” Lana’s brown eyes sparkled. “We spent the day together, and we went to the park. He took me to Bow Bridge, and after we looked out at the lake for a while, he told me.”

“That’s so romantic.”

“It really was. Trace put his arms around me, and looked at me with those sky-blue eyes of his. Then he said, ‘I love you, Lana,’ just like that.” She fingered the locket around her neck. “Then I said ‘I love you too,’ and…he kissed me.”

Vivienne was touched.

“I kind of knew he did, but you know, I worried. I needed to hear the words,” Lana said.

Vivienne needed to hear those words too, but she kept quiet. There was no need to ruin Lana’s moment with petty jealousy.

“Then we walked some more, and strolled through the wild garden.” The waiter interrupted her for a second when he put the hot plates of food on the table. “I’ll never forget that day.”

While they ate dinner, Lana talked more. She was excited, and rightfully so. After sharing a few more details of the romantic date with Trace, she chatted about her acting career. She’d been offered a part in a play, but Vivienne didn’t take in all the details.

She was distracted by the story of love between Lana and Trace. It should have warmed her heart, but instead it highlighted the gaping hole inside her. Vivienne wanted for Jacob to be able to say he loved her, but he couldn’t. She couldn’t force him to, and she wouldn’t want to do that anyway. Yet a question nagged at her. There was no guarantee that Jacob would profess such feelings. But could she live without his vow of love?

*****

Vivienne was really happy for Lana, and as the week progressed, the gloom over her lifted. She was with Jacob, and was very fortunate to have him. She had no right to complain, so she decided to embrace her relationship without demanding more.

Yet when Vivienne had barely recovered, her father called. It was early one morning before she left for work. Usually he texted, so a call meant it was important. Her first thought was of her mother. “Hi, Dad. Is everything okay?”

“Yes, honey, very okay.”

For a few minutes, they chatted about Irene and the details of her recovery. Her mother had managed to get her boss to agree to put her on limited tasks at the restaurant until she was able to return to full duty. “That is good news, Dad. I know she must get so lonely and bored staying home. She’ll be so glad to get back to work.”

There was silence on the other end of the phone. “Dad?”

As if Vivienne’s world hadn’t been shaken up enough, her father sprang a surprise on her. “I’m moving back home,” he said. “Your mother and I are getting back together.”

Vivienne wasn’t sure that she’d heard correctly. Her parents had been divorced for years, and although they’d stayed on friendly terms, there had been no indication that they’d reunite. All sorts of questions flew through her mind, the biggest being why they’d gotten divorced in the first place. But she didn’t want to be negative. Her parents were getting back together.

Tears of joy filled Vivienne’s eyes. “Dad, that’s so great.”

“I’m not so big on dating,” he said. “It’s not like I’m going to find someone else. Irene is my first love, and I still love her, Vivie. We’ve worked things out, and we’re going to try again.”

“I’m just so…happy for you both.”

When Vivienne hung up, she sat on the sofa. After all this time, her parents were together again. It seemed so right. She hadn’t been able to imagine either one of them with anyone else. She reflected that her mother’s recent injury had required them to spend more time together, and like a miracle, they’d reunited.

Her father moving back in made Vivienne feel whole again. Whether her parents were together or not shouldn’t have affected her, but it had. She was still emotional over the news, and she was just so pleased for them. Yet she couldn’t miss the contrast between her parents’ marriage and where she was headed with Jacob.

Vivienne didn’t know if she’d have what they did, or if it was even possible. Jacob was the only man she wanted, but he wasn’t marriage material. He’d said so himself. Vivienne had to take him as he was. Yet that was better than attempting a relationship with some man she didn’t even love.

First, there had been Lana’s news, and now her parents. Vivienne felt so dysfunctional, completely unable to have the romantic relationship she wanted so badly. Yet she couldn’t understand how her life had turned out that way, after being raised by two such wonderful parents. Her parents’ union was a symbol of true love, and evidence of love’s ability to survive anything.