“Look, I’m not here to start any shit with you. I just want to talk to her.” I looked him in the eye imploringly. “Please.”
He opened the door a little wider, and that’s when I saw her. Her beautiful auburn hair was wet and clinging to her face, and she had her arms wrapped around herself. The t-shirt she was wearing only hit her about mid-thigh, but it was who it belonged to that had my blood boiling. With the Savannah State University logo emblazed across her chest, it wasn’t hard to figure out who was the owner of said shirt.
“Sweetheart…” I stepped forward, reaching out for her. I just wanted to hold her in my arms and reassure her that everything was going to be fine and that this was all just a huge misunderstanding that would soon blow over.
“Don’t.” Her posture was rigid and her mouth was set in a hard, straight line.
“Liberty, please, I need you to hear me out. You don’t know the whole truth. I didn’t know anything about the baby.”
“Are you serious?” Her voice cracked. “Can’t you see how much you’ve hurt me already? How much you’ve hurt Maddie? Trust me Shayne; I don’t need to hear another word that comes out of your mouth. I don’t need to hear any more of your lies, and considering you are clearly drunk, I’m pretty sure that’s all I would get out of you.”
“I’m telling you the truth! You have to believe me!” I shook my head. I had to make her believe me. “I am so sorry I never told you about Maddie…but the pregnancy? The abortion? Baby, she never even told me. I had no idea there ever was a baby, and I sure as hell would never make her get rid of it. That was my baby, too!”
Brett walked over to her and wrapped his arm around her protectively. I hated seeing him touch her in such an intimate way, especially when she was wearing nothing more than his fucking shirt. The caveman in me wanted to tear her from his clutches, but I kept my cool and lowered my voice.
“Liberty, please. Tell me what I have to do to make you believe me. I’ll do anything. I can’t lose you.” I was about ready to get down on my knees and beg…and I absolutely would.
“The fact that you feel like you need to
make
me believe you, tells me I shouldn’t. I’m done, Shayne. I’m done with the lies. I never should have trusted you in the first place. Everyone tried to warn me, but I went against my better judgment and thought that maybe, just maybe, you were different. For Christ’s sake, your own father told me that you were worried that sooner or later you would fuck things up, and now I’m the one kicking myself in the ass for not listening!”
She was right. God, she was so fucking right. I knew that eventually I would screw things up with her; it was inevitable. Things between us had been so perfect, and every second of every day I was just waiting to wake up from this amazing dream. A dream about a beautiful girl that fell into my life and stole my heart from the very second I laid eyes on her angelic face. But I always woke up before the dream was over, and now I knew why. Because it was never a dream at all…it was nothing but a fucking nightmare.
“I think you need to do us both a favor and just walk away because nothing you say or do will be able to fix the mess you created.”
“No, baby, please…I love you. I love you so fucking much.” And for the second time today, I fell to my knees before her. It may have been my last attempt to hold on to the woman that I love and want to spend the rest of my days with, and if the tears that were now pouring down my face weren’t an indication of the love I held deep within my soul for this woman, I didn’t know what were.
Liberty shook her head as her own tears consumed her and racked through her tiny frame in ugly sobs. “I c-can’t do this, S-Shayne. I’m s-sorry.”
She carefully slipped free from Brett’s hold and ran past both of us down the hall, slamming a door behind her. Her cries echoed throughout his apartment, and it killed me to know how much I was hurting her. I made her a promise that I would never hurt her, and here I was breaking that promise.
People say that nothing good ever lasts, and that one simple statement was never more so true than now.
But why her? Why did it have to be her?
After Shayne left, I continued to cry long into the night until I finally passed out from utter exhaustion. When Brett slipped into bed next to me and wrapped his arms around me, pulling me snug against his chest, I was relieved that he didn’t push me to finish where we had left off earlier that night. There’s no way I could have gone through with it, and I was a fool to have let my guard down in a brief moment of vulnerability.
I felt the warmth of the sun hit my face as it began to creep through the window and finally decided to untwist my body from the sheets and drag myself out of bed. When I made it to the kitchen, I sat down on one of the stools and propped my elbows up on the bar, resting my head in my hands. Brett was still facing the stove, flipping thick slices of French toast in a pan while he spoke.
“So how are you feeling, darlin’?” He cracked a few eggs and beat them until they were whipped and fluffy before pouring them into another a pan.
“Fine.” I stared at the limestone countertop, tracing my finger aimlessly around a few cracks.
Brett set a glass of orange juice in front of me and gently stilled my hand, pulling me out of my foggy stupor. He tilted his head to the side and with his brow raised; he gave me a knowing look. “C’mon, Liberty. I know when you’re lying. Whenever girls say they’re ‘fine’, it’s never true. Now, tell me how you’re really feeling.”
I rolled my eyes at his perceptiveness. “I feel like shit, Brett. There…happy?”
“That’s more like it.” He turned back towards the stove to finish scrambling the eggs.
“What? So you’re glad that I’m fucking miserable after having my heart torn out and ripped to shreds? Wow. Thanks for attempting to comfort me, Brett, but I think I’ll relieve you of your duties because you really suck at it.”
He slid a plate piled high with golden-brown French toast, perfectly scrambled eggs and fresh cantaloupe across the counter before taking a seat beside me. “No. I’m just glad that you’re being honest about your feelings. You don’t need to go around pretending everything is picture perfect for anyone else’s benefit. If you feel like crying, cry. If you feel like screaming, go ahead and fucking scream your little heart out. But don’t sit there and tell me you’re fine when I know deep down you’re hurting.”
I shoveled a forkful of eggs in my mouth to disguise my trembling lip. I was pretty sure there weren’t any tears left in me to cry, but I didn’t want to take any chances.
“I already called Bob to let him know you wouldn’t be in today, so you don’t need to worry about finding anyone to cover your shift.”
“I’d actually much rather be at work.” I swirled the syrup around my plate at my sudden loss of appetite. “At this point, any distraction is a welcome. I’ll call him back in a little while.”
He lifted my chin and looked down at me with concerned eyes. “Are you sure about that? You’re more than welcome to stay here and just veg out the rest of the day.”
“Honestly, Brett, that’s the last thing I want to do. I need to stay busy and keep my mind off of…
him
.”
“I understand.” He gave my shoulder a gentle squeeze before stepping into the living room to grab two large bags full of clothes.
My
clothes. “Well, you’re in luck. I stopped by his place today with your key and grabbed some of your clothes. I’ll get the rest with Travis and Corey later tonight.”
I slowly swiveled the stool around to face him, my jaw hanging in astonishment. “You what? When? Was he there? Did you talk to him?”
“No, luckily he wasn’t there, but the place was still a mess. Looked to me like he never went back home.”
That didn’t surprise me. Even though I only lived with him for a month, Shayne’s house still harbored so many memories that we had shared together, and I knew I could never go back there without stirring up old feelings. Surely Shayne felt the same way, too.
“Well I appreciate you doing that, Brett. I was worried I was going to have to go to work wearing this.” I looked down at Brett’s SSU shirt that just barely covered my lady bits.
“I don’t know. I bet you’d get quite a few extra tips for wearing that. It is my lucky shirt, after all. I’m thinking maybe I should just bring these back…” He gave me a sly grin before reaching down for the bags, but I quickly swiped them out of his reach.
“Don’t you dare!” I ran down the hall with my bags in tow and tossed them on Brett’s bed. I dug through them and grabbed a pair of jeans and my “AJ’s Oceanside Restaurant” shirt. To my surprise, he even remembered to grab a few pairs of undies. Normally it would have bothered me that he went digging through my underwear drawer, but my only other options would have been to wear a pair of Brett’s boxer briefs or go commando.
Yeah, not happening.
After showering and calling Bob back to let him know that I would be working my shift after all, I spent the rest of the day slaughtering zombies with Brett on his PS3 until it was time for us to leave. I totally kicked his ass, and I made sure to blatantly rub it in his face the whole ride over to “AJ’s”.
It wasn’t even five minutes after I stepped foot in the restaurant, that Bob pulled me aside to talk to me.
“Look, I’m really sorry about all of the confusion this morning when Brett called you. I’m going through a bad break-up right now, but I promise I won’t let it affect my work. I’d much rather just keep busy and get on with my life so I can forget this whole fucking nightmare ever happened.”
I was amazed that I had gotten that all out in one breath, but I figured it was best to just get it out in the open before he started the interrogation.
Bob sat there staring at me with an odd expression on his face, like I had just sprouted three heads and grown a tail. “Uh, Liberty, this isn’t about that. I just wanted to let you know that I received a phone call about an hour ago from a woman who said she’s been franticly looking for you for months. She didn’t leave a name or number, just wanted to confirm that you actually worked here. Normally I wouldn’t divulge that information to anyone, but she sounded pretty upset.”
I definitely wasn’t expecting to hear that today.
“It’s okay, Bob. I think I know who it might’ve been. Thanks for letting me know.” I patted his hand and stood to leave, but he gently took my hand, urging me to sit back down.
“Are you sure everything’s all right?”
No. Nothing was right.
“No…but it will be.” I gave him a weak smile.
“Well, if you need any time off, don’t be afraid to ask.” He rubbed his hand nervously across his neck. “I mean, I don’t know jack-squat about women or relationships, but I’m sure what you’re going through isn’t easy and…ah hell, I’m no good at this shit.”
I had to chuckle at Bob’s failed attempt to comfort me. “Don’t worry about it, Bob. I appreciate the offer, but seriously, I’d much rather be here listening to customers bitch about
their
meaningless problems. And staring at your handsome face of course.”
Bob was in his early 70s, but he was still adorable for a man well past his prime.
He shook his finger at me trying to keep a stern face, but I noticed a hint of a smile. “Don’t push it, young lady. Sucking up will only get you so far, and I already offered you time off. If you’re looking for a raise then you’re shit out of luck.”
I shook my head laughing and stood up again, giving him a quick hug, which I think took him by surprise. When I pushed the door open to step back into the dining area, my light-hearted laugh was cut short. Brett’s expression was laced with worry and standing next to him was none other than my mother.
After hearing that she had called the restaurant, I guess it was only a matter of time before I heard from her again. I just wasn’t expecting her to come all the way down here. My parents seldom left the house for any reason other than to visit my brother’s grave once a year.
I took a deep breath before I made my way over to them. My mother’s mouth continued to move as she spoke to him, but I didn’t need to hear her to know that something was wrong. Brett’s gaze met mine first, and he gave me a half-hearted smile, but it never reached his eyes. That was definitely not a good sign.
When my mother finally turned to look at me, her eyes immediately pooled with tears, and she broke down pulling me into her arms. “Oh sweetie, I’ve missed you so much. Your father and I have been trying to find you for months.”
I pulled back for a moment, not fully believing that they had actually made any effort to find me. “Really?” I scrunched my eyebrows together in bewilderment.
“Of course we have! Did you think we wouldn’t notice that you were gone?” I couldn’t deny that the thought had crossed my mind.
“So how did you know where to find me?” I already knew the answer.
“My brother, Steve. He called and said he saw you here,” she said through sniffles.
“Look, mom, I’m really sorry that I left without any notice. I’m sure I’ve put you and Dad through hell, but just because you found me doesn’t mean that I’m coming back home. I’ve already started a new life here and made new friends. I’m sorry you wasted your time coming all the way down here.”