October Joy (Moments In Paradise 1) (15 page)

“
Obviously I’m not trying to be a people-pleaser!  No, I am trying to please God.  If I were still trying to please people, I would not be Christ’s servant.
”

The pastor went on to talk about how the Church needs to get away from trying to please everyone in the area of music and focus instead on what real worship is, and Sarah knew that went for many areas of her life besides singing on Sunday morning.  She began to think of all the ways she was living in people-pleasing bondage, and it would have been simpler to list the ways she wasn’t.

By the time the meeting ended, Sarah had been so consumed with thinking about ways she needed to focus on her relationship with God above all else, she had forgotten about her conspicuous behavior with Andrew.  Being with him didn’t feel awkward or anything except completely natural and genuine, and she felt free from the opinions of others.  Only she could know what God had planned for her, and the only ones who should have any say in this were Andrew, herself, and Jesus.

Linda and George had an earlier flight to catch than her, and they had to hurry out of there.  She hugged them both, thanking them for inviting her and for their friendship and prayers.

“Keep in touch, Sarah,” Linda said.  “Let us know if you move to California or anything.”

“I will,” she said.  “And I think that’s a definite possibility.”

After they were gone, Sarah knew it was her and Andrew against the world in this crowd where everyone was saying good-bye to one another.  Those who had been sitting near them disappeared into the aisles, which were pretty full at the moment, so she sat down to pick up her purse, and Andrew sat beside her.

“Sarah?” he said.

She looked at him and smiled.  “Yes?”

“How crucial is it you go back today?”

“That’s when my plane ticket is for,” she said, not certain what he was saying.

“If I help you get a different flight, will you stay until tomorrow?”

She had some things to do tomorrow for the women’s luncheon happening on Saturday.  Knowing she was going to be out of town this week, she had already taken care of most of the details and asked others to help with some of the last-minute preparations, but she voiced her second thought.  “You want me to stay one more day?  Where?”

“Out at The Farm with Annika’s family.  I want them to meet you, and I’m not sure when they might have another chance.”

Her confidence wavered.  “Are you sure that would be okay, Andrew?”

“Yes.  They’re really good people, Sarah.”

Having one more day with Andrew appealed to her, and if he thought meeting his in-laws would be fine for her, she was willing to trust him on that.  But could she afford to wait until Friday night to get back and still finish up her “to do” list, and how would she explain her delay?

“I want you to stay, Sarah,” Andrew said.  “But you decide what’s good for you.  No pressure, I was just wondering.”

“Can we get out of here first and I’ll think about it?” she said, seeing someone she knew coming down the empty row in front of them.

“Sure,” he said, rising to his feet as the woman approached them.  Her husband, who had been a very good friend of Levi’s for many, many years was following close behind.

Sarah rose to her feet to greet them both, giving Darlene a smile and a hug.  She had seen them on the first night and talked to them, but she hadn’t seen them since.

“It was so good seeing you, Sarah,” Darlene said.  “I’m glad you made it.”

“Me too,” she said.  “Are you heading back today?”

“Yes.”

Sarah almost said ‘Me too’, but now she wasn’t certain about that.  Seeing Darlene’s eyes shift to Andrew, she went ahead and introduced them.  “Darlene, this is Andrew Morgan.  Andrew, this is Darlene and Bob Ridgefield.  They’ve been coming here as long as me and Levi have, and they’ve been at the same church in St. Louis for what, like fifteen years now?”

“Yes, that’s right,” Darlene said.  “Nice to meet you, Andrew.  Where are you from?”

“California.  On the coast near Santa Cruz.”

“Wow, you’re a long way from home.  Is your wife with you?”

“No, she’s deceased.”

“Oh, I’m sorry,” Darlene said.  “Are you a friend of Levi’s?”

“No,” he said.  “I met him once, but it’s been several years since I’ve been here--at this conference anyway.  I have family here in Iowa.”

Darlene and Bob chatted with Andrew for a minute about where in Iowa he had lived.  Bob had grown up in Cedar Rapids, and Darlene was from a small town near there.  They had gone to school with Levi in Chicago and had been at a church in Indiana for several years before moving to St. Louis.  Andrew and Annika had also lived in Indiana, so they had a lot in common.

Sarah could tell Darlene and Bob were wondering why Andrew had been sitting here with her if he didn’t know Levi, but they didn’t say anything.  They had to get going and told her good-bye, asking if she thought she might be back next year or at any of the other Midwest conferences she sometimes saw them at.

“I don’t know,” she said.  “I’m not sure where God might be taking me from here.”

“Do you think you’ll stay in Minneapolis?  Your kids are there, right?”

“Yes, they are.  But I don’t know.  One day at a time, I guess.”

“Okay, you let us know if you make any major changes,” Darlene said, glancing at Andrew.  “And it was nice meeting you, Andrew.  You two take care.”

Darlene and Bob stepped away, and Sarah looked at Andrew and smiled.  He smiled in return and said, “Oh, we’ll take care, all right.  We’ll take care of each other.”

Chapter Fourteen

Andrew didn’t know about Sarah, but he thought their informal debut as a couple went rather well.  They were stopped a few more times on their way out, and Sarah introduced him to anyone he didn’t already know, but no one said anything directly about them being together.  He caught some others watching them Sarah didn’t notice, but none of them came to talk to her.

One of the things he had learned during his years as a pastor: if someone had an opinion about something, they tended to talk to everyone else about it first and then confront him as a last resort, and more often, not at all.  He knew Sarah and Levi had likely encountered the same, but probably not in such a personal matter.

Once they were outside and headed toward the car, he pulled her close to his side and said, “You were being very snuggly during worship.  What was up with that?”

She smiled.  “You go to a different Place when you worship, and I wanted to be there with you.”

“What helped you do that?”

“I came here today only trusting God and believing Him halfway.  I believed it was okay for us to be together, but only to the point of no one noticing.  I was telling myself I wasn’t ashamed, but I was acting like I was.”

“So it was an act of worship for you to take my hand?”

“Yes,” she said.  “I think it was.”

“It was, Sarah.  And I’m proud of you.  Acts of worship can be scary sometimes, but I never regret them.”

“I don’t regret it,” she said.  “My heart is full of joy.”

They reached the car, and he opened the door for her, but he held her outside for a moment.  “Have you thought about my suggestion?” he asked.

“Not yet.”

“What are you thinking?”

She sighed and spilled all of her concerns, along with her desire to stay.  “I’d love another day with you.  I’m just not sure I can.”

“How about if I drive you to the airport and you think about it on the way?”

“Okay,” she said.

He gave her time to think, and he did some thinking of his own.  Not about his immediate plans, but about future ones--when he might go to Minneapolis to visit her and ask her to come to California.  He knew she was going to Illinois for Thanksgiving to see her parents, and he didn’t want to interfere with that.  He wanted time with Danae and Tate while they were home for Winter Break, and Christmas had been a pretty big deal for all of them since Annika had been gone, so he wasn’t sure what would work the best for everyone.  The week after Christmas tended to be slow at the office, and his kids either hung around the house or went places with friends, so that would probably be the best time for him to go, but he didn’t know if he could wait two whole months to see her again.

When they arrived at the airport, he parked the car in the short-term lot.  She had plenty of time to catch her flight, so he remained in the car for now.  When she didn’t say anything right away, he knew what her answer was going to be.

“You’re going, aren’t you?”

She looked at him.  “I think I should, but I really don’t want to.”

“Why do you think you should?”

“There’s a couple of things I need to do tomorrow, and they’re things I want to do.  If I don’t, Saturday will just be a big burden for me, but if I do, I’ll get some joy out of it.”

“That sounds like a good reason,” he said.

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be.  It’s fine, Sarah, really.”

“Saying good-bye to you tomorrow won’t be any easier for me than today.”

“It’s not good-bye, Sarah.  It’s ‘I’ll call you tonight.’”

“I’d like that,” she said.

He kissed her.  “I love you, Sarah.  This isn’t the end for us, I promise.”

“I want you to send me that message series on enjoying God, but I’m getting it, Andrew.”

“I’m glad, Sarah.  You can’t marry me unless you get that.”

She laughed.  “I don’t think I can be around you and not get it.”

“I have a little something for you,” he said, reaching into the back seat and pulling out a sack from one of his bags.  Handing it to her, he told her to look inside, and she pulled out the rectangular jewelry case.  He had noticed something about her in the last three days.  She didn’t wear a lot of jewelry.  Currently she had on her wedding ring and some small earrings, but the other days she had always worn a bracelet--a different one each time.  Annika had liked bracelets also, and some of them had special meaning for her.

“Andrew,” she said, opening the case and seeing the sterling silver bracelet with a long string of hearts.  “It’s beautiful.  When did you get this?”

“This morning before I came to pick you up.”

“Thank you.”

He helped her put it on and said, “I don’t know if the other bracelets you’ve worn have any special meaning for you, but this says, ‘I love you, Sarah.  I love you, and I’m going to be thinking about you and holding you in my heart every day.’”

She smiled and gave him a sweet kiss.  “Then I’ll wear it every day until I see you again.”

Sarah didn’t cry when they went inside and he hugged her good-bye.  She had a look of self-determination to believe their separation would only be temporary, and he reassured her of that several times.  He planned to remain in contact with her daily.

“Are you going to be telling people in your church about me?” she asked.

He’d been thinking about it, but he knew what his answer should be.  “Of course I am.  They’re going to know about you just the same as if I met you there and you were at church every Sunday.”

***

Grace had forgotten Ryan usually came over for dinner on Thursdays until she heard Tabitha come through the front door shortly before five o’clock and heard Ryan’s voice too.  They came back to the kitchen, and she crossed the room to give Tabby a hug.  She hadn’t seen her since last night when she left with Sierra.

“How did it go?”

“Okay.  Sierra’s doing pretty well, but I’m glad I went.  I had the chance to talk to her more about Mom than I have before.”

“I’m proud of you,” she said.  “Mom would be proud of you.”

“That’s what we’re supposed to do, right?  Use our tragedies to help others whenever we can.”

“Yes, and you’re very good at it.  Better than me.”

“Yeah, you just helped Daddy raise three of us.  I don’t think this quite compares to that.”

Grace didn’t respond.  She had done what she had to do without thinking about it.  But Tabby made it sound like some heroic thing.

“We’re going to study,” Tabby said, turning away with Ryan.  “What’s for dinner?”

“Chicken Enchiladas.”

“Wow.  What’s the special occasion?”

“Ryan’s here, of course.”

Tabby looked at her and smiled.  “Is James coming?”

She laughed.  “Yes.”

“Some of the kids at school were talking about you today.  They said they saw you at Baskin-Robbins.”

“Yes.  I don’t think it’s going to stay a secret.  By Sunday I’m sure everyone will know.”

Grace sat down at the table to do some work while the enchiladas were cooking.  When James arrived at five-thirty, Tabby beat her to the door, and she had a good time with it.

“Well, Pastor James.  What brings you by?”

“Your sister invited me for dinner.”

“Oh?  And why would she do a thing like that?  Don’t you have a kitchen at your apartment?”

“Yes,” he said, stepping inside and closing the door behind him.  “But no one to eat with.”

“And you probably can’t cook like she does either.”

“No, I’m sure I don’t.”

James was talking to Tabby, but he had his eyes on her, and Grace couldn’t keep a smile from forming on her face.  She had been telling herself all day to not get too crazy about this, but the sight of James did bring a joy to her heart she couldn’t hide.

And apparently James didn’t want to hide it either because even with Tabby standing right there, he handed her the flowers he had brought and gave her a sweet kiss, followed by some soft-spoken words.

“I missed you today.”

Grace had missed him too, but she didn’t say it.  “Dinner’s ready.  Are you hungry?”

“Yes.  Is Ryan here?  I saw his car out front.”

“I forgot he usually comes for dinner on Thursday.”

The three of them went into the kitchen, and Tabitha helped her with getting things on the table and then went to tell Ryan it was ready.  James took full advantage of the moment alone with her, pulling her close to him and giving her a tender kiss.

“I really did miss you today, Gracie.”