No Direction Home (Sweet Home Colorado) (6 page)

A loud noise sounded from the back entryway
as Seth and Jamie tromped into the kitchen. “Wait, Jamie, we have to take your muddy boots off. Remember Nana’s rules. Boots off at the door,” Seth said when he hung up their coats and hats.

Grace watched the interplay between father and
daughter as he pulled the red snow boots gently off her feet, listening attentively to her chatter about a book she had read at school. He seemed tender with her. What could he have done to go to jail? Had he hurt someone? He didn't seem the type, but what if he had? Her imagination was on overload.

Jamie glanced up to see her watching them
. A hopeful smile lit up her small cherubic face. “Hey, you did something with your hair. I like it. Are you ready for our tea party?”  She had the sort of face Grace would have a hard time saying no to.

“Well, thanks, but I haven’t been to a tea party in quite some time.
”  She pushed her wayward thoughts aside and exchanged glances with Seth over Jamie's head. He grinned and nodded okay. “You’ll have to show me how it works after dinner.”  It didn't matter that her father was an ex-con—the child was delightful.

“Oh boy, I’ll go get everything set up and call you to come to tea.
”  

“I’ll be waiting.
”  Grace couldn’t help but smile when the energetic little girl ran out of the room.

“Having a tea party is her favorite past time
. Usually, it’s me and Ollie who are trapped into it.”  Seth smiled his slow sexy cowboy grin.

She would bet such a grin had scored big with the ladies
. And she wasn’t immune either as her heart pounded against her ribcage.
Stop it.
Grace warned her traitorous heart—you know very little about this man and what you do know is bad.

Nana bustled into the dining room, laying fresh linen napki
ns on the shining oak table. “I thought we’d eat in here tonight to celebrate your homecoming. Grace, would you finish setting the table for us, while I get the salad? Everything is about ready.”  She wiped her hands against her apron. “Seth, you’ve got some mail over on the hall table. It’s about time for you and Jamie to go wash up. Dinner will be ready in a few minutes.”

“Yes, ma’am, I’ll take care of it
. Sure smells good.”  Seth smiled and glanced at Nana when he headed toward the back of the house.

Grace watched Seth tear the unopened letter into small pieces and toss them into the trash
.
Now that’s strange. I loved it when I got a letter from home. He must really hate his relatives.
She pulled the dishes out of the cupboard in surprise. “Nana, this is the china Papa got you for your anniversary. I didn’t know you used it for everyday.”

Nana laughed and waved a dismissive hand
. “I decided to use the things I enjoy, now, while I still can.”  She sighed with a faraway misty look in her warm brown eyes. “Many of my friends have passed on. Each day is a special occasion. It’s one more day God has graciously given me.”

A chill passed over Grace’s heart at the thought of Nana ever going away
. “Don’t talk like that. You have lots of days ahead of you.”

“I like to think so, but you never know
. Three months ago, Sara Benton and I went out to lunch together and had a wonderful time. Dr. Kruger gave us both our vitamin shots that morning. She was in good spirits.”  She sighed. “That evening she had a heart attack and died sitting on her couch watching a movie.”

“Oh, my goodness
, I’m so sorry. By all means, use the china and anything else you want.”  Nana had the right idea. There were many things Grace had always said she would do later...thinking she would always have later. Now, because of her health, she couldn’t do many of them.   

After dinner, Nana went to visit a friend and Grace agreed to attend the tea party in the living room with Jamie
. Seth sat on the couch reading the
Denver Post.
To anyone looking in from the outside, they would present the image of a loving family, enjoying the evening. A pain knifed through her heart as she longed for a family of her own.

She watched Jamie carefully pour
the Kool-Aid from the small china tea pot into the matching flowered cups sitting on the coffee table. Ollie lay on a cushion close to the table, wearing a pink doll dress, pearls and a floppy pink hat. He didn’t seem to mind. Apparently, he had been through this routine many times and enjoyed snoring his way through the tea party. Jamie handed a filled cup to Grace.

“Thank you
. It looks delicious.”  

“You’re welcome
. This is special tea made by the fairies. It will grant us our secret wishes.”  Jamie giggled. “But first, you have to believe.”

“
Ummm...special magic tea, I could use some of that.”  Grace sipped the cherry Kool-Aid and watched the charming little girl, wishing it was magic tea so she could make her aches and pains go away.

“Then you’ve come to the right tea party
. When you drink my magic tea, special things happen. Ollie and I have a tea party at least once a week and now you can do it with us.”

“I’d love to.
”  Grace sipped the drink. “How do the fairies get in to make your magic tea?”

Jamie smiled and carefully set Ollie’s tea in front of the sleeping cat
. “They come late at night while I’m sleeping and refill my tea jug. I leave them M&M’s.”

“How nice
, have you ever heard them?”

Her big blue eyes sparkled
. “No, silly, they’re magic. You can’t hear or see them.”

Grace smiled at Jamie
. “Oh, I see. Magic fairies you can’t hear or see trade you magic tea for M&M’s.”

Jamie laughed and returned a grin
. “Yep, for M&M's.”  She glanced toward her father. “Dad, come and have tea with us.” 

Seth looked up from the sports page and smiled
. “You’re enjoying yourself without me. I want to read my newspaper.”

“Ah, Dad, come on
. Play with us.”  Jamie pouted her rosebud lips together and gave him a pleading look with big sad eyes. “Please, please?”

“Well, okay.
”  Smiling, he put down the newspaper and joined them, sitting on the floor across the coffee table from Grace. Ollie continued to ignore the whole thing.

“I’m here
. Where’s my magic tea?”  He reached over and tickled Jamie’s tummy. “The tickling bug is gonna get you, pretty girl.” 

She giggled and snorted
. “Quit it, Dad.”  Eventually, she stopped laughing when he leaned back against the sofa.

The playfulness between father and daughter was a beautiful thing to observe
. Grace sat back taking it all in, even though she distrusted him, something in his manner soothed her.

Sitting up and catching her breath, Jamie poured another cup and handed it to her dad
. The last of the Kool-Aid dripped from the small tea pot. “I’ll go get some more magic tea.”  Jamie smiled and carried the tea pot to the kitchen.

Seth leaned forward and lowered his voice
. “Thank you for indulging her imagination. Since she was old enough to talk, she’s always pretended magic fairies would grant her special wishes.”

His voice, deep and sensual, sent a ripple of awareness through Grace
. Sitting this close to the man caused her heart to beat an Irish jig. She had to keep talking. Being around Seth drove her logical mind right out the window. She glanced down at her cup, tracing the flower pattern with her fingertip. Her voice came out in a whisper. "What does she wish for?"

He shrugged
. “She won’t tell me. Says if she tells me it won’t come true, but I have my suspicions it’s for a mom.” 

Grace glanced up, noticing a faint tremor in his voice as though some deep emotion had touched him
. “Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to pry,” she whispered.

“No, it’s okay
. It’s been just Jamie and me for a long time and we’ve worked things out between us. But starting school and playing with the kids who have moms has made her think more about not having one.”

“She’s a sweet child
. You’ve done a good job with her. It’s obvious she loves you,” she said, surprised by this unpredictable man. Who would’ve thought he would be this concerned about his daughter not having a mother?

A satisfied light came into his eyes
. “Why, thank you.”  A grin split his face and warmth crept into his blue eyes. “She makes the tough times worthwhile.”

“You’re lucky.
”  Grace glanced down at the table, breaking eye contact. Maybe this was part of his con game with her and Nana. But at least he had a child out of his marriage. She had brought nothing but grief and an acute sense of loss from hers.

Of course, Seth was different as day and night from Lee
. She gazed into the tiny tea cup. Maybe it was magic. She’d make a wish. She’d wish to live pain free, love as if she’d never been hurt and dance as if there were no tomorrow.

“Hey, earth to Grace
. Come back to the tea party.”  He placed his fingers under her chin and tipped her face toward him. “Why are you sad?” 

His touch sent a sensuous quiver through her but she didn’t like anyone invading her space
. Grace forced a smile and pulled away from him. “I’m not sad.” 

Seth gazed into her eyes
. “Hey now, this is a happy tea party. Jamie’s using her special magic tea and even Ollie has dressed for the occasion.”

The tension between them seemed to melt
. She couldn’t help but smile at the frown on Seth’s face. “Okay, I’m here. I drifted off for a minute, but I’m back.”  To avoid his gaze, she turned toward the kitchen. “Where is Jamie? Is she waiting for the fairies to mix the magic brew?”

“Probably.
” Seth called toward the kitchen. “Jamie, what’s keeping you?”

“I’m coming, Dad
. I have to be careful. Don’t want to spill any of my magic tea.”  She slowly walked out of the kitchen, holding the pot with both hands.

“Good idea
. Wouldn’t want you to have to tangle with Nana about spilt tea on her carpets,” he teased.

“Oh, Dad, you’re silly
. She loves me.”

“True, but she might put you in the corner if you misbehave.
”

“Nah, she wouldn’t if it was an accident
. She’s my friend.”  Jamie set the teapot on the coffee table without spilling a drop. “Let’s have a toast before we make our wish.”

Grace picked up the cup, glancing between Jamie and Seth
. She was enjoying listening to the child. She’d been more tense than she’d thought. It was wonderful to be able to unwind, relax and share this simple pleasure.

Jamie held her cup up in a toast
. “Through the mouth and over the tongue, look out stomach, here it comes.”  She downed her drink while Grace and Seth gasped in unison.

Grace burst out laughing
. “Great toast. Where did you learn it?”

“I know exactly where she learned it.
”  The look on his face mingled equal amounts of disapproval and tenderness. “You’ve been hanging out at the bunkhouse, haven’t you, young lady?”

Jamie frowned at her dad, keenly aware of his scrutiny
. “Travis lets me ride Poky and sometimes we play cards at the bunkhouse when you work on Saturday. Nana said it was okay.”

“It’s okay for you to visit with Travis, but you shouldn’t repeat what you hear the boys saying to each other
. Do you understand?”

A momentary look of discomfort crossed her face and she hung her head and stared at the teapot
. “Yes, sir.”

The glow of his smile lit up the room when he reached over and hugged his daughter to his chest
. “It’s all right, honey.”  Grace could almost feel the warmth flowing around them.
He might be a con man but he wasn’t faking the love for his daughter. That was real.
Sighing, she watched the emotion pass between father and daughter wondering if she would ever experience an unconditional love like they shared.

Chapter
Five

Grace walked through the crowded bar
of the Starlight Inn and into the cozy dining area listening to Cher’s voice blaring on the jukebox, singing about life after love.
How appropriate. I’m living life after love. Life after Lee.

She slid into the booth opposite Cindy
. She was determined to have a good time this evening. “Nana just dropped me off. I’m not late, am I?” 

“No, not at all
, my last appointment called in sick so I came down early. Sometimes I like to be by myself and just sit and watch the people.”

“I’m glad we’re getting together tonight.
”  Folding her hands in a pose of tranquility, Grace was happy to be out with her friend. It had been too long since she socialized with anyone. Taking her life back was empowering.

“Me, too.
”  Cindy relaxed against the booth with a mischievous look in her eyes. “The least I can do is drive you home. This way I’ll be your designated driver. Drink all you want.” 

Grace laughed, feeling the years apart slipping away
. Cindy seemed to be the same fun loving person she had always been. “Thanks for the thought, but I don’t think I’ll need a designated driver.”  She wasn’t the over-indulging type, although a glass of wine now and then did take the edge off on her more painful days.  

“Probably true.
”  Cindy grinned. “That's right, you haven’t been back to the ends of the earth long enough for it to drive you crazy, yet. I’ll be your designated driver next week.”

It was like old times
. Cindy was on, making her laugh at nothing. “Yeah, maybe next week.”  Grace sobered. “I do need to get out. I love the ranch, but I'm going stir crazy. Nana always has stuff going on with her work at the hospital and the church.”  She sighed. “I need to find something to do.” 

Somehow she wanted to help other people suffering with her condition
. Maybe she'd write a book, but she wasn’t sure about how to start. If she let herself, it would be easy to fall into a state of depression, which was one of the downsides of chronic pain that she always had to be aware of. Wanting to avoid that at all costs, she smiled wanly at Cindy.

“You will
, just give yourself some time to adjust.”  Cindy tapped her long red fingernails against the table to the beat of the background music. “I’ve been looking forward to seeing you all week.”  She laughed and patted Grace on the back of the hand in a motherly manner. “And I have an ulterior motive. I wanted to surprise Charlie by having you here. He gets back in town tonight and doesn’t have a clue you’re home. I can’t wait to see his face when he sees you.”  Cindy paused and cocked her head with a mischievous expression. “By the way, he’s single, if you’re interested.”

Grace bit the inside of her cheek
. She’d just gone through this with Nana and didn’t want to rehash it with Cindy. “Thanks, but I’m not looking for a relationship, especially with Charlie.” 

“Now, listen, I know you’ve been through hell and back, but you aren’t dead
. You look great, you’re very much alive and you need to have some fun.”  She waved her hand in the air, dismissing Grace’s protest. “Lighten up. I’m not saying marry the guy. I know he’s not your type. Just have some fun.”

“I’ll think about it
. Maybe I’ve been alone with my thoughts too long.”  Grace pushed a strand of hair out of her face. “I don't mind having fun, but I don’t want to hurt anyone by giving them the wrong idea and besides Charlie is like a brother to me.”

Cindy sat back against the booth cushion to study her
. “When did you get so serious? We’ll have to do something about that.”  She smiled when the waitress walked up to the table and laid menus in front of them.

“Hi, how are you ladies doing this evening?
”

“Hi,
Jenna, we’re okay. I see Charlie has you filling in, again. Who didn’t show this time?”

“Selma fell on the ice and hurt her ankle.
”  Jenna shrugged. “I told him I'd work through the dinner rush this weekend.”

“You shouldn’t let him take advantage of you
. I know how busy you are with your own business. He can be a stinker if you let him. Watch out for Charlie.”

Jenna
blushed. “I don’t mind. I didn’t have any plans for the weekend.”  Her curious gaze shifted to Grace.

“I want you to meet my friend,
Grace Sanders. She’s just moved back to town.”

“Welcome home.
”  The red-haired woman extended her small hand in a friendly gesture. “Happy to finally meet you. I'm Jenna Myers, Cindy’s told me about you. She's been so excited about your homecoming.”

Grace returned the handshake
. “Well, I don’t know what she’s told you, but remember you can only believe half of what  she says."       

“Not true
—you can believe everything, every little word I utter,” Cindy protested. “The thing you have to watch out for is not to make me angry.”  She pushed up the sleeve of her sweater. “You see these muscles? I lift weights and this arm is a deadly weapon.”

Grace raised an eyebrow
. “Like I said, you can’t believe a word she says. She came by those muscles from teasing hair.” 

They burst out laughing
. Once they started, they couldn’t stop. Grace laughed until there were tears in her eyes. She dabbed at them with a napkin, thinking what a joy it was to laugh with friends. She couldn’t remember the last time she had such fun.
The small things in life are so precious.
 

 
“Enough, ladies.”  Cindy frowned. “This has to stop. We’re making a spectacle of ourselves...and I almost wet my pants.”  The peals of laughter started, again. People from the surrounding tables stared at them.

Wiping at her eyes, Cindy raised her hands in defeat
. “Okay, I don’t lift weights. Jenna, when you're off, come join us in the bar. We’re going to make a night of it.”

Composing herself,
Jenna cleared her throat. “Sounds like fun. I’ll be through around ten. Now, what would you like to drink?”

“Yes, we’d like a couple of glasses of White Zinfandel.
”  Grace started to protest.

Cindy waved her hand in the air
. “You’re my date tonight. I know what you like.”

“You don’t have to order for me.
”

“Hush.
”  She grinned at Grace. “I haven’t been able to treat you to an evening on the town in ages. Anyway, I have a tab and Charlie owes me.”

“With the drinks out of the way, what would you ladies like to eat
? The special is Surf and Turf and I hear it's really good tonight.”

“I'm starvi
ng. I'll have that. Colorado Prime Rib with Maine lobster. Charlie has them brought in every Friday.”  Cindy rolled her eyes. “It’s another one of his new business ideas.”  She glanced at Jenna. “Make mine rare.”

“And you?
” Jenna asked Grace.

“I’ll have the same thing, but make mine well done.
”  Grace passed the menu back to Jenna.

“At least some things never change.
”  Cindy grinned. “I always like my meat crawling off the plate and you like yours burned to a crisp.”

When
Jenna walked away, Cindy narrowed her eyes and lowered her voice. “Tell me Gracie Bell, how are you really doing?”

“I told you in the shop
. I’m doing fine. I just have to watch myself. And long as I pace myself, I do okay.”

“Watch yourself...like how?
” 

“Well, it’s hard to explain, but I’ll try.
”  Grace sighed and glanced at her friend. “The main thing is I have to pace myself. I can’t lift anything over ten pounds and I can't overdo it. I learned a lot of things at the rehabilitation center. Like for instance, I rested this afternoon so I’d be able to stay out late and enjoy myself tonight without having excess pain.”

“
It must be frustrating.”   “It was at first, but I'm becoming accustomed to it. At least this way I’m in charge.”  She scratched the table with her fingernail, trying to organize her thoughts hoping Cindy would understand. “The main thing is I have to control my thinking. The bottom line is if I get stressed out, I physically hurt more. It’s up to me to control my level of pain. The pain never goes away. It’s always there lurking, waiting for me to screw up.”

“Oh.
”  Cindy’s brow furrowed. “But I thought with your implant you didn’t feel the pain. Am I wrong?”“Yes and no. The implant helps me feel the stimulation in place of intense pain, but the pain is always there. That’s what chronic pain amounts to...constant pain that never goes away.”  She sighed. “I thank God every day for this technology.”

“I bet it's hard.
”  Cindy paused when Jenna set two long-stemmed glasses of wine in front of each of them.

“It’s happy hour, two for one.
”  She smiled and hurried on to the next table.

Grace shrugged dismissively
. “It's not easy, but I’m past the hardest part. Now I just need to recuperate, manage the pain and decide what I want to do with the rest of my life.”  She pushed a strand of hair behind her ear wanting to talk about something else. “Listen, enough about me. What about you? Is there a new man in your life?”

A secretive smile softened Cindy’s lips
. “I’m over the jerk I married, if that's what you mean. You always said he was a lost cause. Once again, you were right.”  She sipped her wine teasingly, drawing out the suspense. “Far as a new man, I've dated a few. I’m on the lookout for that special someone, but so far he hasn't galloped up on the white horse. I have a guy in mind, but he doesn’t know it yet,” she grinned.

“Who is it?
”  Grace stirred uneasily in the booth, thinking she knew who the man was. As her mind raced, she was only half listening.

“Nope, can’t tell anyone, but when I’m more clear on what my plans are
, you’ll be the first to know.”  She grinned at her friend. "Right now he's playing hard to get, but when the time comes he won't know what hit him."

Grace’s heart plummeted
. Cindy always went for the bad boys. Who had charm, looks and the bad boy image? A wave of apprehension washed over her. She felt disturbing quakes in her serenity. The man had to be Seth.