Next Door Neighbors (21 page)

              “Well, how nice for you, Elena!”

              “It will be nice.”

              Elena giddily thought about Brian coming to see her and how it had been too long. The past year she had grown accustomed to seeing him often, and now that things were slowly going back to the way they were, she was left with nothing more than memories.

              “It won’t be for very long though, unfortunately,” she added.

              Jill nodded slowly in understanding. Taking the last bite of her asparagus, she said, “No, of course not.”

              She tried really hard to not sound too bummed, but Elena caught on. She could always tell when something was bothering Jill, and usually Jill was really good at sharing. Lately though she had been hiding something from her. Elena knew it had to do with Brian, but what exactly she wasn’t one hundred percent sure. She also wasn’t one hundred percent sure on whether or not she should be the one to bring it up. Elena decided to give it a bit more time before saying anything else about her son. It appeared Jill had moved on to cleaning the table anyway.

              “Here, let me help you clean up at least,” she offered, placing her silverware on her plate and then taking her plate to the sink.

              “Thank you, but you don’t have to, you know,” Jill responded.

              “Eh, I’m feeling really good today, and you made the meal so it’s only fair.”

              Jill giggled a little. She really didn’t mind doing all the work. It made her feel more comfortable to stay busy; it kept her mind off a certain someone.

              Both of them put leftovers away, and then Jill washed the dishes while Elena dried. She couldn’t help but think about the time her and Brian did the dishes together after Elena’s birthday dinner. She smiled as she pondered the fond memory.

              When the kitchen was cleaned up, the women sat down in the living room. Jill second guessed herself on bringing Elena’s son up so she opted to talking about what Elena might have coming up activity wise.

              Elena gladly answered all the questions Jill threw at her, knowing full well she was just trying to steer clear of what was really on her mind.

              Eventually Jill ran out of them, however.

              Do I bring up Brian now? Or should I wait?

              She glanced at what time it was, and the time decided for her that it was perhaps a bit too late to get into a lengthy conversation. “Well, I suppose I’ll get my things and call it a night,” she said.

              Elena sat quietly. She watched Jill put on her jacket, wondering if she was really going to end the night without sharing what bothered her.

             
Enough is enough! I’m just going to bring it up myself!

              Just when Jill said her goodbyes and reached for the doorknob, Elena said something that made her stop dead in her tracks. “You’re all he talks about, you know.”

              Jill knew exactly who Elena was referring to, but she didn’t know how to respond. She removed her hand from the doorknob and slowly turned around. “Really?”

              “Mm-hmm.”

              Finding her way back to the seat she had occupied the last hour or so, she asked, “But why?”

              Elena’s look asked, “Seriously, Jill? You have to ask?” But instead, what came out of her mouth was, “He loves you, dear. That’s why.”

              Seeing as it was now in the open, Jill decided to talk about what had all happened right before Brian left. “The day Brian left I found a gift on my doorstep. He gave me your keys, which you already knew that. But he also wrote me this beautiful note that came with the picture of you and Ricky that I had liked so much.”

              “I remember him asking me if you can have it,” Elena interjected. She then added, “To be honest, I’m not quite sure what picture it really is, but I figured if you liked it so much then you can have it.”

              “Oh.” Jill slightly laughed. “It’s a picture of you guys that portray such an immense amount of joy and love. You’re facing him with your eyes closed and he’s kissing your forehead.”

              “Brian took that picture!”

              “That’s what he thought. It’s really nice.”

              “That’s why I kept it! I thought maybe he’d end up being a photographer, but a couple of years later he moved on.” Elena giggled as she thought of her son at that point in his life, and Jill smiled as if she shared the same memory.

              “It was a wonderful gift, but it sure makes me feel horrible with how we left things.”

              “What do you mean?” Elena asked.

              “The night before he came over to tell me your plans,” she started.

              Jill paused, the guilt and pain of what happened striking again. Continuing, she added, “And then he told me his plans.”
              “His plans?”

              “He said he wanted to buy your house and move up here to be near you and to be with me. But I told him we could only be friends.”

              “I see,” Elena whispered.

              “When he left, I could tell that I had crushed his spirit.”

              “I’m sure you did, Jill, but he’s a big boy.”

              Jill put her head in her hands in despair. “I just don’t know what to do!”

              “Well, what exactly is holding you back?” Elena inquired.

              “My past. I just can’t get past everything that happened to me, my mom or even Amanda for that matter.”

              “Amanda?”
              “You know, Amanda, my friend. She found out her husband was cheating on her, but that’s a story for another time.” Jill waved her hand as if to push that conversation away to some future date.

              “But just what Mark did to me, I can’t seem to get over it.”

              Elena saw the pain in Jill’s eyes, the struggle she had in her heart and soul. “Jill, can I be honest with you and give you some advice?”

              She nodded.

              With a heavy sigh, Elena continued with, “You have to move on by trying again. I hate seeing you hurt and all alone. If you don’t try, you’ll miss out on a lot of good.”

              “But I’m afraid I’ll just get hurt.”

              “I’m not going to lie. You might get hurt! But you might also end up having the best love story of all time.”

              Jill took in Elena’s words. Speaking with her friend always made her feel better, as if there was hope.

              “May I ask you a question?”
              “Of course,” Jill answered.

              “Do you love him? Brian, I mean?”

              Jill never really thought about whether or not she loved Brian. She knew she liked him a lot. She knew that the two of them got along well. She knew that he was very good looking and worked hard for those he loved.

              “Honestly, I’m not sure. I’ve never really thought that through.”

              “That’s fair,” Elena replied. Going further, she added, “I’m going to give you one more piece of advice then. You have about a week to figure it out, whether you love him or not. You know all the facts. If you don’t love him, tell him. He deserves closure so he can move on.”

              Jill nodded in agreement.

              “But if you do love him, let him know. Maybe you can both work something out! Just don’t allow yourself to live in the past, afraid of what might happen in the future.” In her closing words, Elena stated, “If you ever want true love then you need to move on. Love is an action, not just merely a feeling.”

              Jill’s face lit up with a smile as she remembered what Brian’s letter was all about. “That’s what Brian said,” she mentioned. Then she asked, “How did you all get so wise?”
              Elena smiled back, “We have Ricky to thank for that!”

19

              For the next few days, Jill did nothing but think. She had to figure out for sure what she was going to tell Brian when he came back up to Ashwin. The little bit of time that she had, she took the opportunity to get her mom’s advice, which was basically the same as Elena’s. She also hashed out every other known fact in her brain. Brian’s letter was read and reread.

              Each day that got closer to Brian’s return was one day closer to Jill needing to go with her heart on whether or not she loved Brian.

              One day after work, the day before Jill planned on Brian arriving next door, she had gone to the store to pick up a few essentials. As she passed the coffee aisle, she noticed a stand that had various mugs displayed. In the center was a simple white mug with bold, black letters that read
‘Love Does’
.

              To her it was a sign.

              A sign that what everyone had said and believed was true.

              A sign that what she had feared most had happened again: she had indeed fallen back in love.

              Jill picked up the mug, an item she now viewed as an essential. Whether she would gift it to Brian or keep it for herself she didn’t know. What she did know was that she needed to have it.

              That night and the next morning Jill allowed herself to again reread Brian’s letter, a reminder to what true love was all about. Elena’s words the week before had the same message.

              And it gave hope.

              For the first time in a couple of years, Jill had hoped that what she found, or rather what had found her, was real love.

              Lasting love.

              True love.

              This is what Jill had dreamed about and had longed for, for as long as she could remember. Until now she didn’t think it would ever happen.

              She wouldn’t let it happen.

              Jill was ecstatic! She knew exactly what she was going to tell Brian when he came back.

              There were just two hurdles left to get over: for him to still want to be with her and finding something to do with her time until he arrived.

---------------

              Jill meandered around the house, doing chores that didn’t need doing or finally getting around to the ones she had neglected for far too long. Anything, big or small, to fill her time and clear her mind so that when she finally did see Brian, she would know exactly what to say.

              There was a commercial on TV that gave her a brilliant idea. Not only would it give her something more to do while she waited, but it would be a great way to break the ice between the two of them.

              Cookies.

              Jill double checked to make sure she had all the ingredients, which in all likelihood she did. It was rare for her to be out of something since she loved to cook or bake all the time and always made sure there was plenty in the house.

              The next thing she had to do was figure out what kind she wanted to make. The mint ones went well last time, and her opinion was that if something wasn’t broken, why fix it? She got all the ingredients out on the counter, and just as she put a few of them into the mixing bowl, it happened.

              Brian’s car was slowing down to turn into Elena’s driveway.

              Jill froze, her heart beating faster than it had in a long time. She was excited yet scared all at the same time.

              Taking a deep breath, she got back to the task at hand. Jill mixed, beat, scooped and baked until a lot of single ingredients put together made a cookie worth eating; much like a lot of small gestures pooled together made true love worth fighting for.

              While the cookies finished up in the oven, Jill cleaned herself up and put on a fresh outfit. Brian deserved to see the best of her so she chose to put on some newer jeans and a form-fitting purple t-shirt that had a plunging neckline.

             
Brian will like this for sure!
              The oven’s beeping could be heard from upstairs, signaling the cookies were ready. Jill quickly went to turn the oven off and get the cookies out. She placed them on wax paper so they could cool.

              Even keeping busy, Jill could feel her fast-pacing heartbeat. And, in fifteen minutes or less, it would probably explode.

              That’s when she and Brian would meet face to face once again.

---------------

              The closer Brian got to his mom’s house, his heart raced. Would he get to see Jill like he wanted to? If so, would she avoid him?

              Originally when he told his mom that he could come up for a bit, he had a few days. But there were some issues that popped up at work so he really couldn’t be gone longer than necessary. He knew what he was up here to do, though, so a day or two would be good enough.

              As he pulled up into Elena’s driveway, he noticed Jill was home. He caught a quick glimpse of her through the kitchen window, looking better than he remembered.

              He had to be patient though.

              Seeing her first thing was not a priority, as much as he wanted it to be. There was one single phone call he had to make that would take care of most of why he came up here.

              Brian took out the only suitcase he had to bring up with him, and unlocked his mother’s door to get inside.

              The first thing he noticed was that it smelled really good. Right away he attributed that to Jill. She always had things smelling nice.

             
And she smells good herself!

              Putting the suitcase aside, he sat down to make his phone call.

---------------

              Jill tested the cookies and found them to be cool enough.

              It’s now or never, I guess.

              She placed them in a container, and with an exhale, she began her short walk next door, having a hard time believing just how nervous she was.

             
Come on, Jill. It’s only Brian.

              Deep down it was more than that though. It wasn’t just Brian. It was her and him possibly beginning a relationship.

              It was her putting herself on the line like he did months before.

              She stood in front of Elena’s door for a few moments before deciding to knock. While waiting for him to open the door, she put on her best smile.

---------------

              “Yeah, I know what you’re saying,” Brian spoke over the phone.

              He listened to what the other person had to say, making sure everything made sense.

              That’s when the knock on the door came.

              Is someone here?

              “Hey, can you hold on a moment? I think someone’s at the door.”

              The person on the other end said, “Sure.”

              Brian placed his phone on the table and went to the back door where the sound of a soft knock came. Opening the door, he was shocked to find who was on the other side. “Jill?”

              All along he had thought it would be him trying to seek her out. Not having been back for more than a half hour and she was the one that sought him out. He didn’t know what to make of that. But he did know he should have probably greeted her better. “Uh, hi, I mean.”

              “Hey, Brian!”

              He loved her smile, and right now he was getting a good view of one of her best. Right in that moment he wanted to scoop her up in a big bear hug and twirl her around for it had been so long since he had seen her, and he missed her terribly.

              Then there was the t-shirt. Its neckline scooped down to a teasing level that made Brian’s heart race and body heat rise. Jill was looking really good at the moment, making him want to touch her all the more.

              But at the same time though, he knew where they stood. It was imperative to play things cool, and so he tried to remain calm and reserved.

              “Did you need something?” he asked, unsure why she’d visit him so soon after arriving.

              Jill was a little taken aback by his lack of emotion. On one hand she understood why he might seem standoffish, but a part of her hoped what happened the last time they talked would have been long forgotten.

             
But of course not. Why would it?
Jill realized.

              “Here,” she said as she handed the container to Brian. “I made some cookies for you. The kind you really like. May I come in for a moment? I want to talk to you about something.”

              Remembering he was still on the phone, he declined. “I’m sorry. I’m just really tired and have a lot to do. I’m actually on the phone with someone right now.”

              “Oh,” Jill said, dejected. She then added, “Do you know when a good time might be?”

              Brian had no clue why she had to talk to him or what about. And although he wanted to spend time with her, he didn’t know when a good time would be. With guilt, he said, “I honestly don’t know. Thanks for the cookies though.” He tried his best to smile, but the hurt he saw on her face reflected onto his.

              Jill took a few steps back and said, “Okay then. Well, enjoy.” She motioned at the cookies she referred to. Turning around, she walked off.

              Brian watched her go, feeling awful, but then quickly closed the door to get back to his phone call.

              When Jill got inside the comfort of her own home, she began to reevaluate the situation. Her thoughts tried to play a trick on her, telling her that he didn’t love her anymore. Her heart, however, reminded her true love doesn’t change. Therefore, whatever may have caused Brian’s demeanor, it had nothing to do with not loving her.

              She decided she’d try again to talk to him.

              Whatever it took, Brian would not leave Ashwin one more time without knowing how she felt about him.