Next Door Neighbors (16 page)

              A deep exhale came out of Jill’s lips.

              Who have I become? All because of a kiss? How could I be so low?

              She began to hate herself. Brian didn’t deserve to be treated the way she treated him.

              Why does he even try?

              Looking over at the flowers she picked up for Elena, she thought it best to get going. There wasn’t time to loathe herself or to even think about all that happened. She needed to shift her focus to Elena and their much needed catching up.

              Jill found Elena’s room and knocked. She put on her best smile in anticipation of seeing Elena’s face when she saw the flowers.

              As soon as the door opened, Elena’s eyes enlarged at the surprise gift and at seeing Jill. “You brought me some African Violets?” Elena asked with joy.

              “I did. Do you like them?”

              “I do! I do! Here, let me take them. Come in, dear!”

              Jill found a spot to lay her winter coat down, and as soon as Elena’s hands were free from holding the flowers, Jill hugged her.

              “You’re looking good, Elena.”
              “Thank you. Can I get you something to drink?”

              “Water is fine.”

              “Take a seat, dear.”

              Elena went to get the water. Something wasn’t right with Jill, but she wasn’t quite sure what, and she didn’t know if she should ask about it or see if Jill would voluntarily admit her problem.

              Joining her at the table, Elena placed both waters down. “So what’s new with you, my dear?”

              Jill gave a heavy sigh, “Oh, not much.”

              Elena gave a puzzling look. Jill was not her usual talkative self. “How’s work?”

              “Work has been busy,” Jill admitted. Then she added, “And this winter is a tough one.”

              Elena let out a small laugh. “I see that.”

              Both of them took a sip of their water. Elena glanced out one of her windows, a blue jay feeding itself on one of the feeders nearby.

              “Were the roads bad today?”

              “No, the snow has slowed some. I think the plows are finally catching up.”

              “That’s good.”

              Elena studied Jill further. She wasn’t making much eye contact, instead choosing to stare out in space most of the time. Her answers were monotone. Whatever was going on, it had to have been something troublesome for the only other time Jill seemed out of sorts was when she found out about Mark.

             
I wonder if it has to do with Brian
, Elena pondered.
And the best way to find out is to talk about him!

              “Seeing all of the snow reminds me of Brian. He absolutely loves the white stuff. Of course he doesn’t get it where he’s at so I’m sure he’s liking it up here.”

              Jill didn’t offer much of a reply. She just said, “Mm-hmm.” Then she grabbed another sip of her water.

              Elena continued on, “You know, I worry about him. He is such a good man. His heart is just like his dad’s. I’m so proud of how he turned out, and I’m so glad he’s been here to help me make this transition. But I can tell he’s lonely. He wants what Ricky and I had, and I always worry he’ll be too picky that he’ll end up alone. I really hope he finds someone.”

              Jill slowly nodded to indicate she understood Elena’s concerns. Offering a half smile, she said, “I’m sure he will.” However, not wanting to talk about Brian, she changed the subject. “So what have you been doing every day? Do you miss going to work at all?”

              Elena had her answer. For some reason Brian was a touchy subject for Jill at the moment. Something must have happened between the two of them, but obviously Jill was not willing to open up just yet.

              Respecting Jill’s decision, Elena dismissed the matter and answered Jill’s questions. “I miss the people I worked with and I miss helping others, but not so much getting up in the wee hours of the morning and working twelve-hour shifts.”

              Jill slightly giggled, knowing all too well what it was like being a nurse.

              “Well, everyone misses you, too,” Jill smiled.

              Elena and Jill continued discussing work and the types of things that Elena did every day to keep herself busy. Jill was glad to hear that there were so many programs in place for Elena to be a part of, and she was thankful Elena took advantage of them. She’s seen too many cases where some older, retired people sat around doing nothing, which wasn’t good for anyone.

              After the two of them played a couple rounds of Yahtzee, Jill noticed the time. She told Elena she had to get going, and then brought the water glasses to the sink. Finding her winter coat, she put it on.

              “Thank you for stopping by today. Feel free to come any time,” Elena smiled.

              “No problem. You may not be my next door neighbor anymore, but you’re still my friend.”

              Elena hugged Jill, and just as she walked out the door she said, “Can you say hi to my son for me? I’m not sure when he’ll be back.”

              “Okay. I will,” Jill stated.

              Elena watched Jill go down the hall and out the front door, her heart burdened. Seeing as Jill didn’t confide in her, she hoped that she would be able to figure things out on her own. Until then, she would continue to be the friend Jill always knew her to be.

              When Jill reached her car, she buried her head unto the steering wheel. Lifting it back up, she groaned. She knew she said she’d say hi to Brian for Elena, but for the first time that she could remember, she might not be able to keep her word.

14

              When Jill got home from work, she crashed on her couch right away. It had been an extremely long couple of days, and for whatever reason, Jill hadn’t been sleeping well. Taking a nap was something she had looked forward to since her alarm had gone off that morning. Now back home with the blinds closed and a comfortable blanket wrapped around her, she sank into the cushions of her couch to catch some shut eye.

              Sleep came fast, and a dream of vacationing someplace warm quickly flooded Jill’s subconscious mind. In her dream she was lying on a beach wearing a red bikini with gold stars imprinted on the fabric. She had on a dark yellow giant beach hat and black sunglasses to shade her from the sun’s powerful rays. Seagulls were heard and seen above and around Jill, some gliding effortlessly on the slight breeze that the air offered. The water before her was as smooth as glass except for the occasional rolling wave near the shoreline.

              Jill was happy. She was relaxed. She was comfortable.

              She was everything she wasn’t in her current waking life.

              In her deep sleep she noticed a towel next to her where someone else was sitting or was supposed to be sitting. Maybe it was her friend Amanda who had many times gone to the beach with Jill. It could have been her mom or Elena, the two women Jill felt closest with. She didn’t know for certain though. The other person never became clear.

              But a voice finally spoke up.

              The deep, husky voice said, “Thanks for bringing me here, Jill. I – we needed this.”

              Jill suddenly awoke.

             
Was that Brian?

              Shaking off any remnants of what she remembered from her dream, the sound of a running snow blower became closer and closer. Jill was curious. She got up and walked towards the direction of the sound, keeping her blanket closely wrapped around her for warmth. Opening the front kitchen window blind slightly, she was surprised at what she saw. There Brian was cleaning out her driveway with his own snow blower.

             
Brian’s back?

              She watched him clear out the driveway, which was badly needed. More and more snow kept getting piled up, and she just didn’t have the time lately to do much; only doing the bare minimum to make it to work.

              Brian had on a bulky winter jacket, some gloves and a hat. The snow was falling quite quickly, and from the looks of it, it was frigid.

              Jill half smiled. Not only because of Brian’s kind gesture, but also because of how he looked. His cheeks were red, and snow was sticking to his coat and face. Yet there he was doing her a huge favor.

              She didn’t expect him to be back so soon. He only left five days ago so Jill figured he must have gotten home and turned right back around. Some of the edge was taken off with him gone because she didn’t have to worry about running into him, but now that he was back she could feel her pulse speed up over excitement.

             
Forget it, Jill,
she told herself.
Remember to just stay away.

              In an effort to distract herself from Brian, she glanced at the nearest clock.

             
Two hours?! I slept for almost two hours?!

              Jill had no idea that she was now running late because of her much needed afternoon nap. She and Amanda were supposed to go out for dinner at a fancy restaurant since Amanda’s husband was out of town, something that had been happening a lot more lately.

              Having to get ready and make it to town yet, Jill knew for a fact she wouldn’t make it on time. Dialing Amanda’s number ended in having to leave a voicemail. Explaining the situation and hanging up, Jill quickly went about her business in getting ready.

              Now all she needed was for Brian to get done with her driveway so she could leave without confronting him.

---------------

              Jill had arrived at Michelangelo’s Fine Italian Dining only fifteen minutes after the agreed upon time.

             
Not bad,
Jill thought.

              She definitely thought it was going to be later than that, but the roads were much cleaner and the traffic was much lighter than anticipated.

              Amanda was spotted right away as she entered the old Italian country house style building. They greeted each other with a friendly hug and smile, and then took a seat as they needed to wait for an open table.

              Jill had been there once, maybe twice, before. The setting was very true to life, and the dim lighting and music softly playing overhead complemented the Italian theme well in Jill’s opinion. Although she was not quite familiar with the menu, Jill wasn’t worried about finding something she may like to eat. Anything Italian was her favorite.

              Both girls chit chatted about nothing serious; mainly catch-up talk on work and the nasty weather they were having.

              “Amanda, table for two,” a tall, slender man called out.

              The two friends got up and followed the man to their booth. It was a corner booth that provided a bit of privacy; the perfect setting for a romantic night out.

             
Not so much for just two friends getting together to hang out,
Jill thought.

              They were handed menus, water and a spiel on specials. The waiter then left both of the girls to themselves to figure out what they wanted to order.

              “Should we get an appetizer?” Amanda asked.

              Looking things over, Jill didn’t see any appetizers that she felt she had to have. Instead, she was eyeing the five cheese stuffed lasagna rolls that was served with Michelangelo’s famous house salad and garlic toast. “I think I’m going to skip appetizers tonight.”

              Amanda didn’t respond, too busy looking through the various dishes offered.

              A few moments later the waiter came back ready to jot down their wishes. With a smile, he listened and doodled what each girl ordered.

              When it was Amanda’s turn to share what sounded good to her, she acted a little flirtatious. At first she asked the man what he thought was the better choice between chicken fettuccini alfredo and spaghetti.

              Jill noticed that, as he responded to Amanda, he looked directly into her eyes with a hint of desire and a smile that showed his perfectly aligned teeth.

              “Well, it depends. Which do you like better? Chicken or beef?” The waiter had a slight Italian accent that even tickled Jill’s ears.

              Amanda sat there gazing into the waiter’s eyes, batting her eyelashes and twirling her hair with her index finger, smiling in return. She finally decided on the chicken fettuccini alfredo, and the waiter took both menus and walked off to put their order in.

              The small scene almost made Jill sick. It came as no surprise that Amanda acted the way she did because she had seen it so many times before. But sometimes it was a little too much. Especially her being a married woman.

              “Why do you act that way sometimes?” Jill questioned.

              “What way?”

              Jill grabbed a sip of her water and said, “Like a flirt.”

              Amanda giggled, “That was not flirting.”

              There was no rebuttal. Jill didn’t see the point, and Amanda barely allowed time for one. Knowing they would have a good chunk of time where they wouldn’t get interrupted, Amanda immediately asked, “So are you still avoiding Brian?”

             
Where did that come from?

              “Um, I wouldn’t say I’m avoiding him,” Jill said, perplexed.

              “I believe that’s the word you used the other day, hun.”

              “Did I? Hmm.”

              “So what’s going on then?”

              “I don’t know. Nothing really. I haven’t seen him.”

              “Because you’re avoiding him.”

              Amanda’s face had a snooty look to it that Jill did not appreciate. She didn’t know the whole story or walked in Jill’s shoes. She had no right to judge. “Amanda, you make it sound like I’m the devil.”

              “I’m not trying to. It’s just that I don’t get why you would want to avoid someone as good looking and hard working as Brian.”

              “You know what I’ve been through. I can’t allow myself to be put in a position like that again.”

              “I think you should give him a chance though. Not all guys are bad.”

              Jill seriously believed that statement. She knew that not all guys were bad. It was just that she felt all guys were bad
for her
.

              Both of them went for their drinks and took a few sips.

              Turning the tables back to Amanda, Jill asked, “So where is Derek this time? He’s been going out a lot lately.”

              “Yeah, well, I’m not sure. I think he’s cheating on me.”

              “What?” Jill shrieked.

              Amanda looked around to make sure no eyes were on them. “Shh!” Amanda warned with eyes bulging from their sockets.

              “Why do you think so?” Jill questioned, a little more quietly.

              “I don’t know. There’s just clues here and there.”

              Amanda shrugged her shoulders, and it became apparent to Jill that Amanda didn’t seem to care that her husband might be fooling around. “Doesn’t it bother you?”

              “It sucks, but if that’s what he wants then I’ll move on.”

             
It’s never that easy to just move on,
Jill thought sullenly.

              “But see, this is why I don’t want to get involved with another man. They can be scum.”

              The male waiter arrived as Jill’s words rolled off her lips. Coughing to get their attention, he then placed their platters before them.

              “Thank you,” both girls said in unison.

              A few bites later, Amanda mentioned, “I just don’t get you sometimes.”

              Jill tried responding with her mouth full, “What do you mean?”

              “What I mean is that here my husband is probably cheating on me and I’m ready to let him go and move on to the next guy. Yet your husband did this to you like three years ago now and you won’t give any other guy a chance.”

              Amanda’s words stung a little. Of all people, she felt that her best friend should understand and support her feelings. “There’s more to it than just cheating though,” Jill admitted in her own defense. “Brian doesn’t even live around here so how would it even work?”

              “Even so, if I had someone like Brian, someone who was as attractive and skilled as that man is, pursuing me, there’s no way I’d let him go. I’d work something out.”

              Jill continued eating her stuffed rolls and let her friend’s words sink in.

              “Face it, Jill. I may not know him too well, but from everything you’ve shared about Brian, that man is a good catch. He doesn’t deserve to be put in the same league as Mark, your dad or even Derek.”

              She hated to admit it, but Jill was beginning to believe that there might be a slight possibility her friend may be right on this one.

---------------

              Elena opened the door, and to her surprise, her son stood before her.

              “Hey, mom,” Brian greeted her, as he moved in to give her a giant bear hug.

              “Brian, it’s good to see you! Come on in and take a seat.”

              Elena’s son took off his jacket as she closed the door behind her. Both of them took a seat in the living room.

              “Boy, it’s cold out there,” Brian said with a shiver to emphasize his words.

              “It’s times like these I’m glad I don’t have to go anywhere.”

              “Yeah,” Brian half laughed.

              The two of them looked out the glass sliding door where snow was already accumulated up to knee level.

              “So did you just get back? It’s been almost a week since I’ve seen you.”

              “I just got back a few hours ago actually. I made seeing you one of my first priorities,” Brian smiled, sounding proud of himself.

              “Well, aren’t you just the perfect child,” Elena teased.

              They laughed together until Brian took on a more serious note. Leaning forward in his seat with elbows on his knees and hands folded, he asked his mom if he could talk to her about something serious.