Read Never Been Ready Online

Authors: J.L. Berg

Never Been Ready (24 page)

The interviewer smiled before saying I looked beautiful, and then she wished us a lovely evening.

Holy shit, it was over.

Until we had to go to the next one.

But I made it through all of them without tripping over my words. I'd even managed to answer a few questions outside of my wardrobe. It had gotten easier, and I'd learned to ignore the camera —for the most part.

"Who the hell are you?" Declan said as we made our way into the theater.

"What do you mean?" I asked, suddenly concerned I'd done something wrong.

"That was amazing. You were smooth, cool, and collected, and you had those interviewers eating out of the palm of your hand. It was fucking hot."

A sly grin spread across my face. "Did you learn a thing or two, Hotshot?"

"Let's not get ahead of ourselves, babe. Don't want your head to explode."

Once inside, Declan saw someone he needed to have a word with, and he asked if I'd be all right for a minute by myself. I assured him that I would be fine, and I was a big girl, so he ran off to talk shop for a minute. I took the opportunity to run to the ladies' room to touch up my makeup and use the restroom. I had no idea how long it would take to wrestle out of this dress.

After finishing my business and managing to suck my body back into the dress, I was touching up my makeup when the restroom door opened, and I was face-to-face with Melody Quinn, Declan's costar and the woman I'd have to witness him having fake sex with in a matter of minutes.

She looked regal and elegant in a dark blue gown that made her sapphire eyes shimmer against her ivory skin. The long black ebony hair she was known for was cascading down her back in perfect waves. I suddenly felt inadequate next to all of her upscale sophistication.

"You are Declan's date?" she asked, showing off a dazzling smile.

"Yes, his girlfriend actually," I corrected.

"Girlfriend? Oh, please, honey. Is that what he told you? He told me the same thing when I fell into his bed, and then he left me just as fast. That man doesn't even know the meaning of the word."

My heart started racing, and I felt light-headed. I looked at her as she placed an arm on my shoulder, giving it a light squeeze. She gave me a sad look as she tried to comfort me.

"Oh God, I see I've upset you. I didn't mean to be so blunt. I didn't know you were so attached. Oh, sweetie, here...let me help you get a cab. We'll get you out of here before he even knows you've left!" she said brightly.

I nodded absently, walking with her, as we exited the bathroom. Everything whirled around me, and I couldn't seem to focus.
Did he lie? Why would he lie to me about something like that?

And just like that, I stopped.

I looked at her again, and her eyes were bright and shining, like she had just won a prize. She was a good actress, but she wasn't that good.

"You know, I'm pretty sure I would have realized if Declan had slept with someone like you," I said coldly.

She started to realize that her little plan wasn't working out quite the way she'd hoped. "Oh, and why is that?"

"Well, his man parts would probably have shriveled up and died by now just from the contact. And since he's still hung like a horse and fucking me several times a day, I'd say you're lying through your teeth. So, why don't you go find some other naive newbie to play around with, bitch?"

If her eyes got any bigger, they were going to pop right out of her Botox-filled head. She turned and stormed off, like I'd just taken her favorite toy away in the sandbox.

Laughing silently to myself, I realized I was in the exact place where Declan had left me. He came sauntering up, looking hot as ever in his black Armani suit.

He leaned in and gave me a kiss on the collarbone, completely oblivious to the verbal fight I'd just had. "Sorry it took so long. We good here?" he whispered.

I just smiled back. "Yeah, we're great."

 

 

~Declan~

 

If I wasn't convinced before, I was now one hundred percent sure that Leah could do anything, hold her own anywhere, and master any situation. I had basically just thrown her into the lion's den, and she had come out completely unscathed. Right around the last turn into the event, as the limo had pulled into the front, I had seriously started to doubt my sanity in bringing her here.

We had been happy in our own secluded little part of the world, away from my crazy life. Why would I willingly bring her here? She knew me and loved me the way I was in Virginia, but here, it was a completely different world. What if she panicked and couldn't handle the life I had? I could lose her in an instant.

But, like so many times before, I'd underestimated this amazing woman I'd fallen in love with. I could tell she had been feeling nervous. I could see it in her eyes and the way she had constantly kept fidgeting with her hands, but she'd stepped up and took charge, learning the twisted game as we went. Every step we had taken, she'd become more confident, more sure of herself, and I had fallen even more in love with her. She had taken my crazy, chaotic life and had run with it, holding my hand as my partner. It was humbling.

I'd even felt confident to leave her for a few minutes, stepping away so I could talk to a director I'd been hoping to get a word with. Those few minutes had paid off, and I thought I had my chance to get a very important foot in the door. As I'd returned, Leah might not have noticed that I had seen her putting my costar Melody in place, but I had. I'd worked with Melody for a few weeks, so I knew her various faces and moods, and I knew when she was pissed. I didn't know why Leah hadn't wanted to share her run-in, but from the smile on her face, I could only guess that she had been the victor, which didn't surprise me. Leah could hold her own —I had no doubt about that.

With my arm on the small of her back, I ushered her to our seats just before the lights dimmed. I was nervous. I hated seeing myself in films. It was weird, and I constantly criticized every move, action, and word, wondering if I could have done it better, different. It was maddening. Plus, this film included my first sex scene, and to add to that, I'd brought the woman I loved.

God, I was an idiot. I should just go now.

"You okay, Hotshot?" Leah whispered as the opening credits began.

I nodded, but she leaned in further.

"You're nervous." It wasn't a question.

She weaved her fingers through mine, and I savored the warmth of her delicate skin. Taking a deep breath, I tried to calm myself as the movie began.

I was a secondary character, and I didn't come into the storyline until about midway, so watching up until that part was easy. My foot bounced in anticipation, knowing my scenes were coming up soon.

When Melody's character went to her next door neighbor's door and knocked, I appeared, and I wanted to throw up.
Fuck, I needed to leave.
This was why I usually ducked out when the movie started or why I wouldn't show up at all. Maybe this was a sign that I hadn't been made for acting. When I couldn't even sit in the same theater and watch my own film, hating every word I said, every gesture I gave, perhaps it was a clue that I was meant for something else.

Her eyes never leaving the movie screen, Leah's hand ran down my thigh as she whispered in my ear, "You look so fucking sexy."

It was exactly what I needed to hear to break the tension running through my body. Her voice was the calm that helped me come back down from my epic freak-out. Relaxing, I countered, "Yeah, how sexy?"

"So sexy, I'm wondering why we've never watched one of your movies before. That could be fun."

"We'll put that on the schedule, babe."

Watching the movie with Leah as she whispered in my ear and ran her hand down my thigh made the minutes go by quickly, and before I knew it, we were at the part I had been dreading. I recognized it immediately when Leah's entire body tensed. Her fingernails dug into the fabric of my pants, and she gasped. Just as Melody and I were about to go at it, Leah's eyes darted down from the screen, and her breathing increased. It wasn't a warm, gentle love scene. I was the side road the heroine took on her way to true love. We fucked, and for everyone in the theater, I was sure it was hot. For the two of us though, it was torture.

Leah was shutting down, and I didn't blame her. Movies today did a very good job of making love scenes look real, and in her mind, all she could picture was what was on that screen and how authentic it appeared.

"Hey."

No answer.

"Leah, look at me," I whispered.

She blinked, looking at me finally.

"Close your eyes, and shut it out," I said gently. "Focus on my voice, and on the feel of my hands. I'm here with you, no one else."

Eyes still closed, she nodded and took a steady deep breath.

"You are the only woman I want. You and I are real. I could do a hundred scenes like this, and none of them would ever change the way I feel about you. You're it for me. I love you, Leah —only and always you."

She opened her eyes, finally catching my gaze, no longer focused on the movie. Everything else disappeared —the theater, the people around us. It was just her as she said the four words I would spend the rest of my life making her never regret.

"I love you, too."

 

 

 

 

~Leah~

 

We skipped the after-party, taking our leave shortly after the ending credits. I thought we'd both had enough socializing for the evening.

Seeing Declan on the big screen wasn't a new experience for me. I'd seen every movie he'd done. But that had been all before I actually knew him, before he'd walked into that bar so many months ago and completely changed my life.

Seeing him act now was completely different. I knew his mannerisms, his smile, and his laugh now. I knew every expression he displayed, and now, when I saw his movies, I could tell he was acting. It was Declan in the movie, but it wasn't him. Because of this, while watching him on the big screen now, I'd felt an overwhelming sense of pride. I could see the talent and power he had when he acted, knowing he wasn't just regurgitating lines but actually taking on his character. It was completely engrossing, and I'd gotten swept away when watching him.

Until the sex scene. I had been so invested in my sexy conversation with Declan and watching his character on the screen, that the love scene had completely blindsided me. I didn't know why. It wasn't like it had come out of left field. It had quite the normal buildup.

God, it had been awful.
It had felt like walking in on my boyfriend doing it with another woman, except I'd gotten to see it in twelve different angles with perfect lighting as it was set to music. It had been a horrid experience.

When Declan had turned to me and told me to tune it all out, I had. I'd shut it all off, focusing on his voice and the feel of his touch. He'd brought me back to reality, reminding me that in the real world, he was mine. When I'd tried to apologize for freaking out on him, he'd covered my mouth with his, ending my attempts before they could even begin.

In the limo ride home, Declan said he was starving, and I agreed. I hadn't wanted to eat before the event. I had felt too scared that I wouldn't fit into my dress. So Declan had the driver take us to this hole-in-the-wall Mexican place. I raised my eyebrows when we pulled in. He just laughed, gave me a quick kiss, and said he'd be back in a few minutes. I was just glad he wasn't making me go in. I'd look a little ridiculous ordering tacos in my ruby red ensemble. After about ten minutes of putzing around on my phone, Declan popped back in with two bags of food, and then we were on our way. We got back to his place, and a few minutes later, he was spreading out the food on the coffee table in the spacious living room overlooking the ocean.

I looked down at my dress before taking another glance at the food. I needed to change, but I was so damn hungry.

"Declan, can you unzip me?"

"Yes. The answer to that question is always yes," he joked.

He came over and slowly unzipped my dress, placing a sweet kiss on the sensitive skin of my neck as he did so.

"Thank you." I turned and shrugged out of my dress, letting it fall to the floor.

Wearing nothing but a lace thong since my dress came with a built in bra, I headed over to the coffee table and sat down on the floor. Declan stared at me, dumbfounded.

"What?" I asked innocently.

"You're seriously going to eat like that?"

"Well, you didn't think I was going to eat greasy tacos in a three-thousand dollar dress, did you?"

"That's an excellent point. I shouldn't be eating tacos in Armani either."

He made quick work of his jacket, shoes, socks, pants, and shirt. He left nothing on but a black pair of boxers that hung low on his hips. I bit my lip when he turned, and I saw the top of his rock-hard butt cheek peeking out of his waistband.
The jerk probably did that on purpose.

"So, shall we eat?" He grinned.

"Absolutely." I smiled. I couldn't wait to see who caved first.

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