Following Your Heart (8 page)

“I don't know,” Susan said after a moment's thought. “I suppose one of the psalms would do. King David had
gut
things to say about going to
Da Hah
's house.”

“Then I will read from the book of Psalms,” Teresa whispered, sweeping again. “I will cleanse my soul and go to meet God tomorrow.”

“You really shouldn't make such a big deal out of this,” Susan said. “It's just church. I've been going all my life. And God can be found in other places too.”

“That's because you don't see how wonderful you have things,” Teresa said, pausing to watch the snow move past the window. “Here in the community things are clean and spotless and new.”

“Well, I guess they are,” Susan said, realizing that Teresa would learn soon enough that no one in the community considered themselves perfect.

“Let's move upstairs now,” she said. “This room is done. Not quite spotless, but
gut
enough. That's sort of the way we are too, Teresa. I hope you can learn to take us that way. We aren't perfect, you know. And we never will be.”

Teresa said nothing but followed Susan out of the bedroom. At the kitchen doorway, Susan paused to say, “We're going upstairs,
Mamm
.”

“Just a minute,”
Mamm
said, standing at the kitchen sink and looking out the window. “
Daett
's bringing in more wood from behind the barn right now. He might need some help.”

Susan walked to the kitchen window to glance at her
daett
's form struggling across the yard with an armful of wood. She went through the washroom and opened the outer door. “Do you need help,
Daett
?” she called.

He shook his head and kept coming.

“He's okay,” Susan told
Mamm
when she went back into the kitchen.

Mamm
nodded, still watching Menno coming across the yard.

“What's on our list for the rest of the day?” Susan asked, holding the stair door open.

Teresa stood by, waiting to follow her upstairs.

“I think we'll take the rest of the afternoon off,”
Mamm
said. “Or we could bake, but this is Teresa's first Saturday here. Perhaps we'll save baking for another day.”

“Don't worry about me,” Teresa said. “I know I won't be much help with baking, but I'll be glad to watch and learn.”

“We have plenty of food in the house,” Susan said. “I'm for taking the rest of the day off.”

“Some of your sisters will probably be coming over tomorrow to visit,”
Mamm
said, her brow wrinkled. “Should we make something more? But I guess we can feed them popcorn and apple cider.”

“They'll all be bringing something if they come,” Susan said.

“I suppose so,”
Mamm
replied. “I think I could stand a little time off myself.”

“On a snowy day, that would be perfect,” Susan agreed. “So let's get this cleaning done, Teresa.”

As she followed Susan up the stairs, Teresa said, “Your mom's such a sweet person. I'll work extra hard next Saturday.”

“You'll do no such thing,” Susan said. “Now, let's start in my room, and then we'll move to yours if Samuel's awake by then. If not, we'll do the others first.”

Following Susan into the bedroom, Teresa swept the floor. Pausing in front of the closet, Susan fingered through her dresses, stopping at a dark-blue one. “Teresa, come over here.”

“Yes?” Teresa stepped closer. “What is it?”

“This is the dress you're wearing tomorrow,” Susan said.

“But it's yours,” Teresa protested.

“
Yah
, but it will fit better than my sister's old one you were planning on wearing.”

Teresa stared at the dress. “I can't wear that one,” she said. “Why, it looks like one of your best ones. Really, Susan.”

“Come!” Susan motioned with her hand, holding the dress up beside Teresa. “A perfect fit I say. We won't even have to adjust anything.”

“I can wear what I'm wearing now.” Teresa pulled back. “I really can't take one of yours, and one of your best, I'm sure.”

Susan giggled. “It
is
my best dress, Teresa. The one that makes Thomas swoon, and
you're
wearing it. Here, I want you to try it on now.”

Teresa just stood there as Susan pulled the pins out of Teresa's work dress. She lifted her arms as Susan pulled the dress up over her head.

Taking the dark-blue dress from the bed, Susan gave it a gentle shake before she brought the dress over Teresa's outstretched arms. Pinning the dress in two places, Susan stepped back. “It's perfect!” Susan pronounced. “Just perfect.”

“Oh, I can't stand this!” Teresa said. “It's so…not right.”

“You need to stop making a fuss about everything,” Susan said, pulling the pins out.

“I know,” Teresa said, lifting her arms. “But right now I feel like a princess being dressed and undressed by her maid. And here I am the one who should be the maid.”

“You
are
a princess, Teresa, and a very special one, so quit running yourself down,” Susan said, handing Teresa the work dress and waiting as she slipped it over her head. Samuel's cry came from across the hall before Teresa was done sticking the pins in.

“Careful,” Susan said moments before Teresa's muffled “Ouch.”

“See, you should let me help you,” Susan said. “There's a trick to this you haven't learned yet.”

“I'll get it yet!” Teresa laughed. “Let me take care of Samuel. I'll be right back.”

“Okay. Don't hurry,” Susan called toward Teresa's retreating back. She continued her cleaning and then walked across the hall into the bedroom where Samuel was lying contentedly on Teresa's lap.

“He looks happy,” Susan said.

“With his tummy full, and his mama with him, he should be,” Teresa said. Then her face clouded over. “There's only one thing missing in his life—a daddy.”

“Don't waste energy worrying about things that can't be helped,” Susan said. “That's how we do things in the community. So relax this afternoon. You must be exhausted from all the new things you're learning. And tomorrow is Sunday.”

“Yes, Sunday,” Teresa repeated, getting to her feet and placing Samuel gently on the bed. She grabbed her broom as Samuel's eyes searched the ceiling. “I can hardly wait, Susan! Let's finish this room while Samuel's still awake.”

“He's such a darling,” Susan said, stopping to kiss Samuel before she began dusting.

When they were finished, Susan wrapped Samuel in his blanket and took him with her as they moved to the next room. Before lunchtime arrived, they had completed the last bedroom and gone downstairs where
Mamm
had sandwiches ready. Menno was already at the kitchen table. He motioned for them to be seated.

They bowed their heads in prayer and ate in silence. Susan kept her eye on Teresa to see if she would show signs of embarrassment as the silence continued. But Teresa seemed to be enjoying the peace.

“The snow's getting ready to quit,” Menno said when he was done. He pushed back his chair and stood. “I think I'll shovel off the walk one last time. Even with the snow, we have much to be thankful for. It looks like it's going to be a beautiful Lord's Day tomorrow.” Menno didn't wait for an answer. He went out the kitchen door into the washroom.

Moments later Susan heard the outside washroom door open and close.

“How can he tell what the weather will be tomorrow?” Teresa asked. “There's no radio or television.”

Anna smiled. “Menno isn't always right, but it comes from years of working close to the soil and being outside. And he's got a barometer out in the barn. I would guess it's rising.”

“That's still so awesome,” Teresa said, watching a few stray snowflakes floating past the living room window.

“Oh no!” Susan gasped, following Teresa's gaze. “There's a buggy coming in from the north.”

“Well, if you didn't give Thomas such rude welcomes, he wouldn't have to keep coming back so often,”
Mamm
said.

“
Mamm
, it's not Thomas,” Susan said, her voice rising. “It's Deacon Ray's buggy.”

“Oh no!” Anna said, jumping to her feet. “I wonder what he wants?”

“You know what he wants,” Susan said, grabbing Teresa by the arm. “Let's get you upstairs and out of sight.”

“You shouldn't do that,”
Mamm
said. “If the man wants to speak with Teresa, there's nothing we can do about it. You'll just be putting trouble off until some other day.”

Susan let go of Teresa's arm and moved to the living room window.

“He's not coming in,” Susan said after she'd watched awhile. “Looks like he's planning to speak with
Daett
in the barn.”

“Come away from the window,” Anna commanded. “It's not proper that he sees you staring out at him.”

“Please invite him to come in,” Teresa said, now seated on the couch with Samuel in her arms. “I don't want you taking anything bad for me. I'm the one who deserves whatever the man has to say.”

“He shouldn't be saying anything,” Susan muttered. “
Daett
already told him everything he needs to know. You would think they could give a soul a little peace around here.”

Teresa's voice trembled. “I'm sure he's a man of God and knows what's right and wrong. I'm willing to speak with him and listen to what he has to say.”

“That's very
gut
of you,”
Mamm
said, her lips pressed together. “You already speak as one of our people should.”

“Well, don't speak for me,” Susan said. “I want to hear what he has to say first before I agree with him. I can't imagine that anything has to be done so quickly. We haven't even been to church yet. And it's not like I've brought the world home with me.”

“Perhaps he thinks so,” Teresa said. “You know what I've done.”

“But we have all sinned,”
Mamm
said, sitting down beside Teresa and holding her hand. “Perhaps Deacon Ray brings
gut
news for us all.”

“I wouldn't be counting on
that
,” Susan muttered, still standing at the window. “I saw how he looked at us the other day.”

“Is he still speaking with
Daett
?”
Mamm
asked, still holding Teresa's hand.

“
Yah
, but it looks like he's getting ready to leave.”

“Then it must be
gut
news he brings,” Anna said, trying to smile. “He wouldn't be leaving without speaking with Teresa if it wasn't.”

“That would be nice to think, but I don't believe it,” Susan said. “Oh,
gut
, he leaving. He's climbing into his buggy now.”

Silence filled the room as they waited, even Samuel holding still as if he felt the tension in the air.

“
Daett is
coming in,” Susan announced moments later.

Menno entered by the washroom door, making bumping noises as he cleaned up.

Susan knew he was removing his coat and boots.

Her
daett
opened the kitchen door, appearing seconds later in the doorway, his hand stroking his beard.

“Well, sit down and tell us what Deacon Ray wanted,”
Mamm
said, motioning toward his rocker.

“Perhaps I should speak with you first,” Menno said.

“Perhaps you should,”
Mamm
agreed.

Teresa held up her hand. “Please. If this is about me, will you tell me now? I need to know.”

Menno looked at
Mamm
and nodded. “
Yah
, it might be for the best. We cannot hide what has happened.”

“Menno, please,”
Mamm
said. “Do not tell us there is bad news.”

“I must say what I must say. The ministry has met this morning, and Deacon Ray has come to tell us what they decided. They are not allowing Teresa to attend the church services. If we wish to keep her in the house, then that is up to us. But she is not to mingle with the people.”

“Daett!”
Susan gasped. “This cannot be true.”

Mamm
had jumped to her feet, her face white.

“This is a hard thing, Menno,” she said. “How can this be?”

Menno hung his head. “I don't know. But I do know I can do nothing about this.”

Susan rushed over to Teresa. Surely her friend would burst into tears any moment.