Entangled (43 page)

My aunt, Derrick and Landon announce their thankfuls and we soon begin our feast. I make a note to call my mother and wish her a good day. In reality, I hope we can patch things up, move forward and forget the past. Maybe starting over without my father would give us incentive to work on a mother-son relationship. I contemplate asking her to move here, closer to her sister, away from him. She needs a fresh start like me. I know Aunt Linda misses her and wants to be close again, since their relationship became estranged for the same reason ours did.

“Are you okay?” Maddy gently touches my leg, making me flinch, pulling me out of my thoughts.

I smile and lace our fingers together atop my knee. “I’m great.” I lean in and kiss her lightly on the lips. “I love you. Happy Thanksgiving. This food is amazing.”

“You too and thank you.” Her face rests against my shoulder. It’s probably the best Thanksgiving I’ve ever had. We finish the evening cuddling on the couch, watching movies, surrounded by our loved ones.

Chapter 47

Maddy

The week has been a blur. Thanksgiving was great but then, the week flew by and was emotional. I took Noah’s advice and went to the hospital. It was really depressing and difficult. He was sleeping but I told him everything. I cried at his bedside. I told him how life isn’t fair and he doesn’t deserve to be sick and how much I loved him and how much I’m hoping he pulls through. I poured my heart out to him. I didn’t hold back. It was nice though, to get it all off my chest. And then I spent the evening with Noah and cried myself to sleep in his bed. But I didn’t care and he didn’t care. He let me cry it all out and then I crashed. But then I was okay afterwards, the next day. I felt relieved and Jim had heard everything I’d said and was thankful for my words.

Now it’s the night before our flight. Well, it’s actually morning now. But I’m so tired from tossing and turning due to nightmares that I don’t know what time it is. I slept maybe a couple hours at most. Nightmares plagued me, breaking me up in cold sweats and panic. I’m not sure what brought it on except possibly the fact that I’ve never flown on an airplane so I don’t know what to expect. Not to mention, I’m a little apprehensive of flying, thanks to too many movies or news stories of plane crashes. It’s also due to Nine-eleven. That still weighs heavily on my mind. That day changed us all.

I sip my coffee at the table, dazed. I’m exhausted, when I should really be excited. I’m finally getting my dream of seeing New York.

“Wait, what happened? Who are you and where did you stash my girlfriend?” I glance up at Noah, confused. He laughs when he sees the crease in my forehead and head tilt, like a deer-caught-in-headlights look. “I just mean, I was expecting to be woken up by your excited squeals and bouncing off the walls attitude.”

I lean back, understanding now. “Yeah, I would be bouncing off the walls in excitement had my mind not decided to fuck with my sleep. I was tossing and turning all night with nightmares. I’m so tired, which sucks because I want to be excited. I mean, I’m going to New York. I can actually cross this off on my bucket list.” Noah smiles and moves to stand behind me, his hands grasp my shoulders, his thumbs knead my tight muscles, breaking the tension. I drop my head, forgetting what I was saying…or thinking for that matter. Holy shit, his hands are miracle workers. A moan slips from my mouth, my eyes closed while my mind drifts to some very naughty thoughts concerning Noah’s hands and my body or something. He works to my spine and my lower back.

“Fuck!” I yelp from half pain and half pleasure. It hurts so much it’s good.

“Babe, you’re so knotted up. Jesus.”

“Please don’t stop, keep going. I need all these knots gone. Shit.” I groan, hoarsely. I hear him chuckle behind me.

“Is this…turning you on?”

“You’ve no fucking idea.” I hide my grin, but it’s pointless since he can hear it in my voice. He moves his fingers up and down, under my shirt making me gasp and grip the seat for restraint. “God dammit, Noah. Why can’t I control myself around you?”

“Because I’m just that good.” His hands move around to my stomach, slowly moving down…down…and I can’t take it anymore. I twist my body around so fast, I become dizzy. But I ignore it, finding the hem of his shirt and lift. Our eyes, hungry and wanting, showing we both feels the same intense desire. There’s no smiling, no laughing, it’s complete seriousness…instincts taking over all common sense. I trace my fingers along the hard muscles of his chest. I hear him suck in a breath, and then he runs his hand over my collar bone, stopping above my right breast. “I lose control with you Maddy.”

I let out a breath, “That makes two of us.” He lifts me up gently and sets me onto the table, leaning over me. I can feel his shaky breath on my cheek. “What do you want to do about it?” I ask him.

He smirks, “Absolutely nothing.” And then our lips crush together. My hands explore his pants area, moving them off his hips. His greedy hands squeeze my ass as his lips trail sensual kisses from my throat to my belly button. I arch my back, feeling tingles between my legs, which worsen when his fingers find their way down there, around there. I moan, raising myself up to meet his lips. “Fuck Noah, fuck.” I say against his mouth, not making any sense.

“I don’t fuck, Maddy. Not anymore. I make love…to you, because you’re mine and I love you. Fucking knows no feelings, and I won’t do that with you. Ever. I need you, every bit of you.” His tongue grazes my teeth.

“We have to stop, we have to end this now. We have a plane to catch.”

“We’re going to be in New York for a few days, we’ll finish this there, with no distractions. I’ll show you how you make me feel. I’ll fulfill your every desire, this I promise you.”

I massage the back of his neck and feel his head push against my hand, enjoying the connection. “I believe you.”

“Good. Tell me about your nightmare. What was it about?” We clean the kitchen, finish packing and drink coffee, once we’ve calmed down and controlled our racing hearts.

“It was about flying. I had a couple nightmares that our plane crashed before we landed in New York. I’ve never flown so my head is a little jumbled with scary flying scenarios.”

He lifts my hand, up to his lips and presses a kiss on each finger. “You’re safe. I promise I won’t let anything happen to you.”

For his benefit, I smile. He makes me feel safe, so I’d trust him with my life. “Ready?” I nod, grasping onto my suitcase and carry on. Luckily we’re only there for five days, or I’d be packing two suitcases. But since we can only have one carry on, I’m okay.

“I promise, I’ll be fine. If anything changes, I’ll call you. But don’t worry, enjoy your trip.” I hug Andi goodbye, partly guilty for leaving. I just hope nothing tragic happens while we’re gone.

“I love you. You’re the best friend, ever.” I hug her tight before Noah pulls her in an embrace as well.

“Take care of yourself.” He tells her sternly.

“Jesus, you both act like you’re going away for a year. Go! Have fun, you deserve it! I love you both!” We watch her get in her car, wave and leave.

“Time to go, babe.” He lifts our baggage and walks to the ticket booth. I remain still, staring out at the road Andi drove down.
Please, don’t let anything happen,
I say to myself.

I take my suitcase from Noah’s grip and check it in. We get our boarding passes, stand in line to get frisked and find our gate. My stomach knots up, tense with nerves. People scurry about, finding their place in this busy but small airport, either lost or late. I doubt they even worry about the planes crashing. “I need coffee. No, I need Xanax.”

“Hey.” I pace the walkway, glancing at the gift shop, then the Starbucks across from me. Noah grabs me by the shoulders, forcing me to stop and look him in the eyes. “You’re gonna be fine. Millions of planes fly daily and nothing happens.”

“What if we get on one that is broken and they don’t know it?” God, I need to shut up. I’m so paranoid.

“Okay, no more Final Destination movies for you. Come here,” he leads me to a seat and I sit, feeling like such a shithead for being so difficult. “Let’s play a game.”

“Sorry,” I motion with my hands, “I have no brownie mix.” I smirk.

“Well, you just ruined my entire trip.” He shoots back. “I guess I’ll have to find another hottie who has some batter.” I smack his chest with the back of my hand and he yelps, “Okay, okay. Maybe not.” He lays his arm across my knee, clasping our hands together. “I actually had a game in mind.”

“I’m intrigued; your games tend to border on erotic…which is great for when we’re alone. But uh, we’re not…so,” I take a deep breath, feeling slightly relaxed, “Hey, my anxiety is settling.” I kiss his cheek, pleased that I don’t have that nauseous feeling in the pit of my stomach anymore. Maybe I can enjoy this plane ride afterall.

“That is perfect. So you wanna play my game?”

“Nah, why don’t we people watch instead? I like trying to figure out what their stories are.” Absently, Noah plays with our clasped hands, observing the passengers waiting for our plane. “Okay, so that chick there,” he discreetly points to a brunette sitting by the window, by herself with a  frown on her face, “is returning home after finding out her boyfriend cheated on her and she’s mentally cursing herself for not hooking up with his best friend when she had the chance.”

I imagine how shitty her luck would be, feeling sorry for her. Hopefully that’s not the case. “Okay, um,” I look around and spot a blonde chatting with her girlfriend, “Okay, that blonde over there is telling her best friend about this guy who turned her world upside down. She’s clutching her phone, waiting for a text from him so she can experience the butterflies again for the first time in her life. But of course her best friend thinks she’s crazy and needs to get laid because such a love doesn’t exist.”

“Maybe her best friend just never felt the intense swarm of butterflies before or what a thrilling experience it is and doesn’t really think it exists. If she had, she’d understand.” Somehow our game has become personal.

“I’m nervous about meeting your mother.” I state in honesty. He blinks. His arm wraps around my side, pulling me close. “Honestly, I am too. But not because of you. I just worry about her health, well-being. I just want her to be okay. I know she’ll love you though.”

“She’ll be so happy to see you. You’ve changed so much since you moved. You should be proud. I know I am.” His head drops to my shoulder.

“You have a lot to do with that. When I was giving that toast at Derrick’s party, I wanted to tell you that you were the biggest reason that I’m happy and the move didn’t suck like I originally thought it would. But I didn’t want to be rude because my aunt and Derrick had some to do with it too.”

“I know. They’re the reason I didn’t go off the deep end all those years. And of course Andi’s family too.” I choke back my emotions, thinking about them. Noah holds me, comforts me and then kisses me before standing up.

“You still want that coffee?” I shake my head a little too eager. “I’ll be right back.” I look around at all the passengers. Dozens of planes have flown in the sky. They survived, and so will I.

Noah approaches me with a steaming cup of Joe. My hands snatch the cup from him on instinct. “Thank you.” He laughs.

“You’re gonna be fine.” Our flight begins boarding, finally. We gather our bags and get in line. “Ready?” He takes my hand, leading me away from home to a place I never thought I’d get to go.

Chapter 48

Noah

When I was little, before my life went to hell, I flew on my first plane with my parents. I was so excited, even though my father would yell at me for jumping all over the place, hyper. I mean, I was 5, flying on a plane, all kids are rambunctious and excited. But he chose to threaten me that if I didn’t sit quietly like a good little boy, he’d leave me behind in Florida where my grandparents were living at the time. So I sat quietly, but inside I was a Speedy Gonzalez. It wasn’t my favorite memory but it was worth remembering for this case.

I move my head to look at Maddy. She’s sitting up tall, holding her breath, gripping the shit out of the arm rest. I try not to laugh because it’s not funny but she just looks so cute…and funny. “Take my hand.” I hold mine out to her.

“I’m fine.” She grits her teeth, staring straight ahead.

“Babe, breathe. There’s nothing to it. Think happy thoughts.” I wish I’d brought a card game or something to distract her mind. “Wanna play hang man?” That’s the best I got now. It’s a stupid game, I know. She doesn’t answer right away, but then her expression changes to one of remembrance.

“Babe, please get me my bag. I have a game we can play.”

I quickly get up and open the overhead compartment to find her bag and hand it to her. She opens it and shuffles through it, finding the object. “Okay, so we don’t have the space for the board and I don’t wanna lose the pieces. But here,” she hands me a box with cards. I inspect and open it.

“So we each pull out a card and search through some choices of questions. This game is so fun, but the questions are hilariously outrageous and sometimes embarrassing.”

“Sounds perfect. Let’s do it.” If it keeps her mind occupied on something other than the departure of our moving plane, I’ll do it. “You first.” She takes a card from the deck and reads them to herself, her expression changes several times.