Dirty Desire (16 page)

Jesus this leg.

It’s been a week since I was shot. I should be walking better by now. I could sue the hospital for keeping me in that room. It’s their fucking fault I’m not healed yet.

The hallways are all dark and empty on the first floor, but that doesn’t stop me from looking in every single room I come across. This club has a lot more single occupancy rooms for those guests that are in need of immediate release. Some of the shows here can get pretty dark and sometimes the patrons, well, they need a place to go if they aren’t comfortable doing things in public.

The club doesn’t care what they do in the audience, but most people aren’t exhibitionists.

“Empty,” I growl, my anxiety that she’s not here is burning inside me. If they used her last night, where are they keeping her? The basement still? Wouldn’t Kayla put her somewhere nicer so she doesn’t look like she slept in a dungeon when on stage?

I just need to find her. My mind isn’t even processing what’s going to happen after I find her. I just need her and I need to be able to touch her, if only for one more time.

Walking towards the service elevator to take me to the basement because I don’t trust my leg on steps right now, I run across Stan again.

Great.

“Hey. Miss Kayla had me shut that down last week. She said it needs serviced.” He nods towards the elevator and shakes his head. “I’ll be happy when you’re back here, Mr. Gregory. She’s something else to deal with.”

“I know.” I take a look at the elevator. “Did it break?”

“No sir. Last I knew it was working perfectly. I guess she just doesn’t want it to break with anyone in it. Less liability and something…” he trails off and chuckles to himself as he continues his cleaning.

“Well can you get it turned back on for me? I need it. Steps and I aren’t really on good terms right now.”

“I saw that limp. Everything good, Boss?”

“Everything’s great, Stan. If I could get the elevator?” I nod towards the doors and he takes off to turn it all back on for me. I’m growing impatient. This is all taking way too fucking long.

The ride down is slow as hell. I just want to be to her already. If she isn’t here I might just lose my damn mind.

When the elevator opens, I head straight for the first door I see. These rooms down here are, for the most part, storage and offices. Only a few VIP rooms reside on the other side of the hall, but this side is bare bones.

Last time I went looking for her I was like a bull in a china shop. I didn’t expect what I was ambushed with.

This time I’m ready. With my gun in my hand, I peek into every empty room until I make it to a turn. Closing my eyes, I prepare myself for what’s on the other end of the hallway around the corner.

Thank god Leigh brought the silencer to my gun. I have a feeling I’m about to have to use it.

Rounding the corner as carefully as I can, the guard at the door immediately sees me and stands.

“You shouldn’t be down here,” he boasts. He obviously he doesn’t know who I am.

“Excuse me.” I start walking towards him slowly and see him grab for his gun. Bringing mine up immediately, he’s obviously not trained like I am.

Thank you, mother and father, for forcing me into lessons.

His hand nervously slips for the gun and I click the safety off.

“Move,” I growl.

“I can’t do that.” He stands his ground, pulling his gun out and aiming it for me.

Fucking idiot.

One shot clean through the shoulder puts him down in a millisecond.

As he screams and moans, I go for the door.

“Where’s the fucking keys?” I scream at him after finding the door locked. He’s on the floor, moaning in pain and trying to hold the wound. He’s shaking his head and not answering me but all I can do is picture Harper behind that door.

Alone. Cold.

Mother fucking nope.

“Tell me!” I raise the gun again, this time aiming square between the eyes. “Now.” I growl.

“H—” he stutters. “Hip.” Attempting to roll to his side, he reveals the key clip. The groans coming out of this grown man are pathetic.

I go down and grab them swiftly making my way through the keys to find the one that unlocks the door.

When I swing it open, I have no clue what I’m about to find, but what I do find scares the shit out of me.

“Knox?” Her voice is weak. She’s not wearing clothes but she looks clean. Of course.

She’s naked, sitting up in bed with tears streaming down her face. I never decorated rooms in the basement. Kayla’s been planning this for a while, it seems. She probably used the renovation of the décor upstairs to cover the spending she used down here.

Harper looks at me sadly but she doesn’t get up and come to me.

“Harp?” I walk over to her as best as I can. Now that I’ve found her some of the anxiety I’ve been feeling melts away and all I can think about is holding her in my arms again.

Making it to the bed, I sit, propping my leg up on the bed, shoulder to shoulder with her. Something’s wrong…fuck of course something’s wrong. She’s been held in a solitary room in a basement for a week. She’s without clothes. She fucking had to go on stage last night! I have no goddamned clue what’s going on in her head right now and I don’t even know how to act around her. What’s going to make her break? What’s going to make her feel comforted?

Fuck if I know.

“Hey,” I start, and immediately she breaks down in tears and curls her body in to mine.

My arms go around her and I let her cry it out. I know we need to get out of here but I know she needs a moment. My fingers brush against her skin. She’s cold. I bring the blanket up and wrap it around her. Doing so makes me notice the red welts on her legs and I see red.

“Harper what did they do to you?” My voice comes out as a growl and I want nothing more than to find everyone in this building that had a part in this and murder them all.

She doesn’t answer but a small whimper before she pulls the sheet tighter around her so I don’t see the marks.

It’s useless, though. I can’t forget what those look like.

She’s smaller than she was the last time I held her. I know it’s only been a week but she feels smaller than she was before. There are not as many curves to her body, the way she’s holding herself, it’s like she’s given up.

“Hey, we gotta get out of here,” I whisper, standing up. She looks up at me with those beautiful blue eyes and sniffles the cutest of fucking sniffles. There’s so much we have to talk about. I have no goddamn clue what we’re going to do from here, but I know she’s mine.

And I can’t lose her.

“Ok,” She tries to smile but it falls flat the minute the heels start coming down the hall. “No,” she whispers, eyes wide at the door. Clutching the sheets, she pulls them up to her chest and starts to tremble. Tremble! My fucking girl is strong. She doesn’t tremble!

Kayla walks around the man on the floor at the door, I grin when I hear her struggle to get over his large frame, and stops just inside the room, smiling that crazy Cruella Deville smile she gets when she turns the crazy on.

“Well, well, well…isn’t that something? A wife, her husband, and the plaything all in one room. Sorry I had to go to such drastic measures, Knox baby. I knew you weren’t ever going to do it.”

Fuck. Me.

It feels like I’ve been hit with a semi-truck.

Married? He what?

“Wife?” I whisper, looking at her like she’s grown two heads. “He’s not… Knox…” I glance at him and the look on his face tells me everything I need to know. “Knox?”

“Come on, let’s get out of here.” His voice is low and I can tell he’s pissed but I don’t know at whom. Me? The blonde woman starts to protest but Knox holds the gun towards her. Who pulls a gun on his wife? “Unless you plan on shooting us both, you’re going to let us walk out of here today.”

“She doesn’t belong to you, Knox.” Her eyes flick to me, then back to him frantically. She knows she’s losing…but honestly none of us are winning today. I need away from both of these crazies…before them my life was perfectly boring enough to be normal. Why can’t I just go back to that!?

“She doesn’t belong to you, either Kayla!” He bellows. Hands shaking, he raises the gun towards her head. “Move!” he snaps. She jumps and glares at me before stepping aside. He takes my hand and I don’t resist. I think I’m still in a state of shock and my brain can’t catch up with my own emotions.

Married?

“You know what this means,” She says, just as we’re outside the door of the room.

I watch his reaction to her words. His hand tight in mine, his entire body tenses.

“Yes,” he growls. “I’m completely aware of it. I’ve already had John start filing the paperwork.”

“I never want to see you step foot in my club again, Knox.”

He chuckles and shakes his head.

“Fuck you, Kayla.”

Paperwork? Her club? What the fuck is going on?

“I need clothes,” I whisper, looking down at the sheet that’s covering my body.

“I’ll have John stop to get you some on the way back.”

The way back? Back to where? Where the fuck is he taking me?!

“Wait!” I snap as the elevator doors close. He looks at me and freezes.

“What? What is it?”

“I…Knox I don’t know what the fuck is happening!” My hands are trembling as I rip mine from his. “A wife? A club? What the hell is this all about?!” I feel like I’m fraying and slowly burning at both ends. Physically I feel violated and angered at my body for responding to that like I did last night…and Jesus Christ emotionally….

I’m fucking crushed. He knew I was here? He knew about me and he didn’t save me yet? I …

“Knox I can’t—” The air around me suddenly becomes very thick and very difficult to breathe. “I can’t do this.” I whisper, sliding down the wall of the elevator.

“No...no, no, Harper come on,” he picks me up in his arms and I involuntarily curl into his body. As much as I feel like I need to hate him right now, I’m hurt and he’s the only safe place I know right now.

“I need Leigh,” I whisper as we step out of the elevator.

He pauses mid stride before responding.

“Okay,” he finally answers.

When we get outside, there’s a black car waiting for him. With only a sheet wrapped around me I feel like I should be embarrassed, but I’m not. I’m hurt. I’m hungry.

And I’m so goddamned tired of this.

“Oh my god,” John says, climbing out of the car to open the back door. “Knox we have to call the cops.” Knox stops mid stride and my heart starts racing. “Look at her!”

“I know!” he barks. “Fuck,” he looks at me, his features tight with worry.

I just want this over. I just need out of here. I don’t want to relive what I went through every fucking day.

“No, please,” I whisper. “Just take me home. No cops.” I’m on the verge of another breakdown and I can’t handle any more right now.

“Harp—”

“Stop!” I cry. “I just want to go home!” I push him off me and storm to the car, sliding in the back seat. When he starts to make his way to sit by me I freeze. “No!” I bark, glaring at him. “I just want to be alone back here,” I mumble, lying down across the bench. He looks at me wearily before closing the door and walking to the front. When he slams the passenger door, he mumbles something to John about pills and runs his hands through his hair.

There’s too much shit going on in my head right now. This is the club—
THE
club that Knox owns. I haven’t gathered much since I’ve been here but today confirmed what I was suspicious of.

A play thing? If that’s what I think it means, then he’s been behind this the entire time…right? Fuck! I want every single goddamned answer but I don’t want to have to talk to anyone right now. I just want to sleep.

The drive home is long.

Good lord I was far from home.

Lying back here in silence, it gives me time to assess what the hell is happening with my life. There are still so many unanswered questions but I just can’t. Not right now.

All I know is my trust in Knox is blown, I’ve probably lost my job from being away so long, and my heart is absolutely demolished.

There’s no coming back from Knox Gregory.

Any normal girl would be fine…they’d move on with their life after finding out a boyfriend was married, albeit very angry…but they could.

I can’t.

I won’t be able to.

I need to know the entire truth.

“How far are we?” I mumble, getting tired of being wrapped in a sheet in public.

“About twenty minutes.”

“Can you have Leigh meet us there?” I mumble.

“He’s at work but he’s trying to get off as soon as he can.”

The car is silent for a moment after that. I know it bothers Knox that I don’t want to be around him, but I don’t give a fuck. He’s lucky I can stand being in the same car as him right now.

“Are you hungry?” Knox asks, looking back at me. He’s been silent the majority of the drive and I’m happy for it. I glare at him without giving him an answer.

Just when I thought I was actually learning to love someone, something like this goes and happens.

His fucking wife?

He turns back around in his seat and lets out a huff. I know he’s annoyed that I’m not talking to him. I probably should thank him for getting me out of that hellhole…but I don’t know what to say to him. What took him so long?! Why’d he let them do that to me?! Why me?!

When we pull up in front of my apartment I start getting nervous. I don’t want him to come in with me…but he lives here. He has just as much right to be inside as I do. I just…I don’t know if I can be alone with him.

“You going to be ok, Harper?” John asks from the front seat.

“She’ll be fine,” Knox growls, eyeing me carefully.

I give John a weak smile and shrug.

“I’ll be as good as I can…all things considered. Can you come in until Leigh gets here? I don’t want to be alone.”

I see Knox pause at my door as he’s opening it but luckily he doesn’t say anything. I can’t take him yet. He knows exactly why I’m pissed and he’s lucky he’s still standing after what he’s put me through. I know there’s going to come a time when we have to talk it out…but I’m so weak right now.

“Absolutely,” John says awkwardly.

He opens the door and I walk in, not stopping until I get to the bathroom.

The door locks behind me and I don’t feel bad for shutting him out at all. Nor do I feel bad for making John wait for Leigh to get here.

Nope.

Not one bit.

The shower is hot. Scalding, really. I couldn’t seem to get it hot enough while I was captive, but this time I can and I scrub.

Hard.

I need to rid myself of those memories if I’m ever going to make it out of this in one piece.  I notice the water start to go cold just as the first tear streaks down my face.

Why me? I’m nothing special, why did this happen to me?

The harder I cry, the harder I scrub, and eventually the water is running ice cold but the pellets of ice feel like luke warm water hitting my skin. There’s no pain…there’s nothing.

“Harp?” He knocks gently on the door but I ignore him and end up crying harder.

My body goes weak, tears blurring my vision, and I slide down the shower wall. I don’t cry, I fucking hate it, but there’s no other way for me to get this out so I’m letting it flow. The man on the other side of that door hurt me. Destroyed me. I don’t want to let him go, but I think I’m going to have to. Whatever he did…or didn’t do…at the base of it all he lied to me.

A lie I don’t know if I can walk past and ignore.

A sob escapes me and I bring my knees to my chest, letting the cold water from the shower fall down on me.

“Harper?” I hear him wiggle the lock and roll my eyes.

Stop caring, Knox.
This will make it so much easier if you just stop caring.

“I’m coming in, Harp.”

Of course he is.

The lock disengages and I curse myself for ever telling him where the bathroom key is. I close my eyes, not wanting to see him right now. Even in the car, watching him stew the entire ride home, I found myself softening to his actions.

He fucking lied to me. He’s fucking married!

“Fuck Harper,” he whispers, dropping to his knees by the side of the tub. “I’m sorry baby.”

Baby?

His words make me want to love him and hate him…punch him and never let go of him. Mother fucker!

“No!” I scream, tears rolling down my cheeks as I recoil from his touch. “No.” I say with a little more resolve to my voice. His face falls and it looks like he’s lost his will to fight anymore.

Well good. You fucking destroyed me
.

Standing, I turn off the water quickly and dry my face and glare at him.

“You’re not allowed to talk, Knox.” I step out of the bathtub, wrapping a towel around me. Still dripping, I storm straight to my bedroom. The door slams behind me. He won’t be so ballsy as to follow me in here. I think I’m being surprisingly nice to him at this point. All things considered. I throw on the first pair of comfortable clothes I see and fall into bed. I let the tears roll until sleep overcomes me.

“Obviously she doesn’t want to see you right now man…what the hell did you do?”  I open my eyes to Leigh’s voice out in the hallway. Glancing at the clock, it’s only been an hour since I closed my eyes but it feels like I’ve been sleeping for days. That haze of too much sleep keeps my body right where it is…comfy and in my own bed.

“I…” I strain my ears for Knox’s response and wait.

He lied.

He’s married.

He has a sex club.

He’s married.

Something about him not doing a job so she did it?

At that point I had already tuned out everything around me, but I have a feeling that there’s more to this story than him being married.

I’m worried it’s going to make me hate him even more.

“Can you just go check on her? Please,” he huffs. I hear the emotion in his voice…something I’m not used to hearing.

Well good. I hope you rot in misery for what you put me through.

My door creaks open and when my eyes lock with Leigh’s he immediately tears up.