Burdened (A Burdened Novel) (63 page)

She squares off
, and I realize how dumb she really is. I’m not going to stop him. Scott should have stopped her. I stand back, looking at Scott. His face is scared, but it doesn’t say he wants to stop them. What is he doing?

Glen looks at him and he doesn’t speak. “Did you hear what he just said to me?”

“Glen, I’ve tried. There is nothing more I can do. I talk to you, but you don’t accept me—you don’t even
believe
me. I have nothing else.” His words are filled with hurt. “You don’t
choose me
.” He takes two steps back. Glen turns back towards us.

I pull Nathan’s arm back. “I know
. I heard,” he says.

This is worse than we thought.
I step back to his side. “Okay, so now what?”

“I got it. I don’t know how this will play out
, but I won’t hurt them—no matter what she does.” He grabs my hand; I guess to keep him down.

“Glen
,” he speaks loudly. “Scott did
not
lie to you. Everything he’s said is the truth. None of us are here to hurt you. You have been around us for days—around Scott even longer. You love him, right? Why don’t you believe him?”

Glen looks back at Scott
, who is looking at the ground. She turns back. “Because it doesn’t make sense.”

“Why would he lie?”

“Why wouldn’t he?”

“Glen, this is not a game. Why would he lie
? What has he done to you for you not to believe him?”

“First
, he doesn’t want me. Even after us—” She catches herself. “Then, he comes back and wants me, but holds back from me, plays with me. All I want is him; all I think about is him; all I need is
him
.”

“So
, knowing how strongly you feel about him, you still don’t believe him? You said he was holding back, but repeatedly he has tried to bare his heart to you, and you continuously reject him. How do you expect him to act?” Nathan throws up his free hand, shaking his head. “We had it wrong. This isn’t Scotts fault—it’s yours.”

Glen looks shocked
, then turns back to Scott. “Is that true?”

Seconds
pass, and Glen jumps—her expression changes. He must have answered her in her head. She walks over to him, and says something out loud.

I’m distracted by Nathan turning to me. “I think I fixed it.”

I smile at him. “I think you did. Good job, marriage counselor.” I wrap my hands around him. “Thank you.”

“Anytime.”

I lower my eyes
. “Thief.” He leans down, kissing me. “So, when are you going to let me see into
your
head?”

He smiles
, baring his white teeth—he has a great smile. “Why are you trying to see into my head?”

“You see mine.”

“If you were to look into my head, you’ll only see you. Like when you look into it while we’re—”

“Don’t say it.”

His smile widens. “What?”

“Tell me you love me.”

“I love you.”

31: Broken

 

Glen and Scott stay on the beach, and we go back into the house. They look happy—finally. I hope they will stay like that, and I think they will, as long as Scott doesn’t erase her memory of it all. The kitchen is clean, and the window has been fixed.

We go to Taylor’s room
—which I’ve never seen before. Her door is open, so we walk in. “Hey,” I greet her and Justin.

She has a couch in her huge room
that they are both laying upon. She has a king-size bed, and a wall-size vanity. Her room is painted lavender. It’s soft and relaxing. They’re watching a movie on her TV.

“Everything okay?” Taylor asks
, sitting up. Justin looks to us for the answer as well.

Nathan sits
on her bed, pulling me with him. It feels weird to get comfortable on someone else’s bed. “It is for now,” he answers, lying across Taylor’s bed all too comfortably. I rest against him. I watch Taylor and Justin do the same.

“Take it as it comes
, right?” She sits back, getting comfortable.

“Exactly.”

No one says anything for a while. I guess they are really into the movie, which I’ve never seen before. It’s pretty damn boring. Nathan throws a pillow behind his head and takes a comfortable breath.

“You two okay?” Justin asks
, not looking in our direction.

“Yea
h. For now,” Nathan answers, putting his arm around me.

Justin nods. “Good.”

“You start back at school in a day or so, right, Tracey?” Taylor asks, still looking at the TV.

“Yes
,” I answer undesirably.

She turns around and looks at Nathan
. “And what are you going to do about that?”

“What are you asking
, Taylor?”

“What are you going to do?”
she asks more firmly.

He looks at her
. “I’m going to let her go.”


Let
me go?” I ask, sitting up. What is that supposed to mean?

“You know what I mean.” He looks at me through low eyes.

“Are you sure that’s a good idea?” Taylor asks with a flabbergasted expression.

“What do you suppose I do? She’ll be finished soon.”

“Nathan, you cannot be serious.” She exaggerates, “Yeah, and while she’s sitting in class, here comes Roehl, strutting through her classroom, posing as a new student. She
is
going to be enthralled by him.”

“Wait! What!?” I turn towards Nathan.

“Yeah, you will,” she says unsentimentally. “Then, she’ll be driving home and he’ll catch her then—or better yet, while she’s walking through the halls!” She’s hysterical. She’s making
me
hysterical.

I look at Nathan. “Calm down
, Tracey.” He turns to Taylor, who looks pissed. “So what do you suppose I do?” he asks for a second time. “She has to finish school. You know I won’t let anything happen to her—in my presence, or out.”

“Nathan
, you cannot—” She pauses, and looks at Justin. “No!” I must have missed something. “You both sound crazy. What if something happens? And clearly, we can’t trust Scott to look out for her as we had originally planned.”

“Wait
—” I cut her off. “When did we plan something?”

She shakes her head.
“Bad choice of words. We just discussed the idea. I shouldn’t have said ‘planned.’”

“Okay
, but why wasn’t I included in this discussion?” I turn to Nathan, expectant of an answer.

“Tracey, the question came up when we were leaving
the house earlier, before we went to talk to Roehl, and it was just said—it was more like an idea. I wasn’t doing or planning anything without you,” he says, nonchalantly.

“Wait
—” Taylor grabs my attention. “Tracey, listen to me.”

“Don’t
, Taylor!” Nathan says with a deep, demanding voice.

“No! Do
, Taylor!” My voice is flooded with attitude.

“Tracey!”
He says my name firmly, as a father would when scolding a child.

I sit back against him
, reluctantly. That tone forces me to do what he says. I don’t like that, it belittles me.

He shakes his head
. “Sorry, I didn’t mean for that to come out like that.” His tone is softer. I cross my arms like a child. He turns to Taylor. “You are crossing a line.”

“No
, Nathan—you’re not approaching it.”

All I know is
, someone better tell me something before I start tryouts for the ‘fantastic four.’

“Taylor is just scared for you
, Tracey, and she is really blowing the whole situation out of proportion.” He rubs my arms, and I calm.

“I agree
, Taylor. You know they will handle it. Nathan is not going to let anything happen to her.” Justin rubs her knuckles. “And what happened when you all went to talk to Roehl?”

Good question! “We talked and
, as usual, he acted as if nothing was going on. He told me I didn’t belong there, since I no longer looked upon him as family.”

Taylor turns around to him slowly. “What
—did he forget or something?”

Nathan shrugs
, and with that I know there is a long story waiting for me—about Roehl and Nathan’s past.

He let
s his head fall, shaking it slowly—something shames him.

“Honestly
,” he starts, “when I saw him in the woods, I knew he was going to try and do something. I just didn’t know what at the time. And I dropped the ball. He was happy I did, which he told me. He also informed me, regardless of my efforts, he would take Tracey.”

He lifts his head. His face is expressionless. “I told him he could try. He reassured me he will with a pat on my back.” He shifts his weight. “We changed the subject to talk about your father’s death. And he asked about Tracey
—her abilities. This went unanswered.” Of course it did. “He asked about the family. I kept my answers short—until he began talking about you, Taylor.”

Justin sits up
, which makes Taylor sit up. He turns his full body. His eyes are fully black. Whoa. “And what was it about?”

Okay, I am really missing something.

“That’s what I’m curious to know. What is it that you owe Roehl, Taylor?” Nathan sits up straight, moving me to do the same.

Taylor looks between the two of them.

Justin gains a demanding tone. “Speak, Taylor.” I jump at the startle from his voice.

Taylor reaches for his hand
, but he moves away. That’s harsh. She trembles slightly, then turns to Nathan, who is still calm. He really
is
hard to read. I didn’t even know there was a problem until he said something.

“Nathan,” she starts.

He puts his hand up. “Before you speak, I just want to let you know, it had better be a damn good reason.”

She looks
at Justin. “I agree with him,” he says as the darkness fades from his eyes.

Taylor looks torn
, and I can tell, whatever it is, she doesn’t want her brother to know—or Justin, for that matter.

I scoot closer to Nathan
, wrapping his arm around mine in case what it is pisses him off. Taylor looks at me thankfully.

Nathan gives me a look as if I’m choosing
her over him, although I can feel him un-tense. I’m not choosing; I just don’t want him to blow up.

“We are waiting
, Taylor,” Justin says impatiently.

She takes a deep breath but still doesn’t speak. I confirm for myself that procrastination runs in the family. I too am growing impatient. It has to be really late and this
has already been a long-ass day.

“Nathan
, I did go to Roehl,” she finally responds—after minutes tick past.

“Why?” Justin cuts in harshly.

“I needed something taken care of.”

“Like what?” Nathan says forcefully. She looks away from him to me. “Say it!” he demands angrily. I rub his arm and he reluctantly calms, shaking his head.

“I needed you to kill your father…after what he did to us.” She looks at Justin, who isn’t moved, then back at me.

She breathes
. “I asked him to help me—” She pauses, looking for the word. “—entice you.” She looks at Nathan, and he just stares at her. “I knew she would be okay,” she speaks in a rush. “I knew nothing would happen to her. I wanted him dead, and I couldn’t do it myself.”

Nathan brings his hand to his face. “Taylor
, just tell me what you did—and calmly,” he adds.

She places her hands in front of her. “I did go to him
—with a request. It started out with me asking him for someone with an ability that would help me kill him. He told me ‘no,’ but would, instead, get you to want to kill him.”

“But he already wanted to do that
,” I interject, getting looks from everyone.

“He did
, but he wouldn’t have done it soon enough. Nathan takes his time…I didn’t want to wait.” Nathan doesn’t say anything. “So we agreed to—” She takes a longer pause, lowering her head. It irritates me. “—go after…Tracey—to anger Nathan.”

Each word
comes out like its own sentence. I can’t believe what I’m hearing.

“Tracey, I am so sorry
. But I knew you would be fine; I knew Nathan would help with whatever happened.” Her eyes fill.

Mine do the same.

“Finish,” Nathan pushes quietly. How can he take any more of this? What more could there be?

“I
know about Eddlen coming to you and doing what he did. Nathan killed him, which stopped any further plans of using him. I needed something stronger than my story of what happened to me and Justin, so Roehl created Tracey’s dreams.” She stands. “It worked out perfectly that our father was as crazy as he was and actually followed through with his own thoughts of wanting to kill us.”

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