Box Set: The ArringtonTrilogy (114 page)

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Sylvia quietly stole in. She stopped by the
cradle first, peering in almost lovingly as she covered the baby
with the blanket draped over the side.

“There, sweet baby. It’s the only time you
are sweet,” she crooned, and then went to the mirror to look
herself over. She gazed at herself adoringly, then picked up a
brush and began long strokes to her waist-length hair.

I stayed still, only taking subtle breaths
when necessary. I needed to get back to Heath, but I was trapped in
the bedroom and relished the opportunity to finally obtain the
upper hand. She was unaware she was being watched. Though she had
locked the door from the inside with the key she kept tucked away
in a dresser drawer, she didn’t have the privacy and secrecy she
desired.

From the pocket of her dress, she pulled out
my bottle of perfume and liberally applied the sweet scent to her
neck, then gently trailed the liquid down her bosom with her
finger, with eyes closed and an evil, crooked smile masking her
youthful face.

“Now Ayden will desire me,” she whispered
aloud. “I see how he looks at me, how his eyes linger on my
breasts, how he pretends to accidentally brush up against me. I
feel his yearning.”

Sylvia was consumed in some kind of trance.
Her eyes fluttered madly under her lids as her hands moved freely
over her body, and she breathlessly called out Ayden’s name
repeatedly until she finished. Then Sylvia fell onto the bed and
went into a childish, uncontrollable giggle.

It took all the self-control I could muster
to stay hidden until she decided she was done being a sinful, vile
girl - everything my grandmother believed I was. Flashbacks to the
words Eugenia Arrington spewed at me, filled with venom and hatred.
She accused me of doing such wicked acts. I cringed at the memories
and struggled to contain my emotions.

When Sylvia finally left, I made my quick
exit. I wanted to confront her, reprimand her for stealing my
things, and accuse her in front of everyone of destroying my
beloved doll, and most of all of being a lustful, licentious whore
who was after my own husband. Nonetheless, I had my priorities. I
needed to get back to Heath, to care for him just the way I’d
promised.

Heath was awake when I came in, and as if my
emotions were sewn onto my sleeve, he asked me what was wrong.

“You need to stop worrying about me,” I said
lamely as I dipped the cloth into the bowl, then placed it on his
warm head.

“I was beginning to think you’d forgotten
about me,” he murmured while gazing up at me.

“Are you hungry?” I asked, ready to bring him
more soup.

“A little,” he said. He allowed me to help
prop him up a bit.

“Good,” I replied through my frozen smile. I
was so upset that the minute his expression went serious and
disturbed, I excused myself before he noticed my tears. “I will be
right back with your soup.”

The island was bustling with activity the
minute the children stepped out of the rowboats from school. James,
Jr. was a dedicated young man, and reminded me so much of Heath at
that age. He took to his chores, and then got straight to his
homework and studies. I admired him from afar, as my fondness ran
deep. Sometimes, when he walked across the island heading toward
the oil house or barn, I would envision him as Heath. Then reality
would come flooding back, especially when Sylvia would appear.

This evening she was giddy and extra
flirtatious with Ayden as she sat beside him at the table. I came
in, only modestly glancing their way. I wasn’t hungry and planned
only to go in and dish some soup. Ayden’s eyes followed my every
move, waiting for the perfect opportunity to make me jealous, and
when I came through the dining room, he swung those penetrating
midnight blue eyes onto Sylvia, and then moved his chair close
beside hers. No one seemed to notice how close they sat and how
Ayden obviously went out of his way to act shamefully and make me
jealous. “Sylvia, would you mind passing me the biscuits?” he asked
with a devilish smile, knowing she would have to lean over him to
do so.

Because there was always so much commotion at
supper time - whiney children, sickly Lizzy who would hurl at any
given moment, Owen and Oliver pushing each other to get to the food
first - it didn’t surprise me that Ayden wasn’t caught flirting
with the Coopers’ pretty daughter.

Instead of giving in to Ayden’s immature
behavior, I held my head high, turned my back, and went on my way
without giving him another glance, though inside I hurt terribly. I
was losing Ayden to Sylvia. She gave him the undivided attention
he’d always desired. She was a stunning girl, with curves even most
grown women didn’t possess, in all the right places.

A part of me hated Ayden for flirting with
her and resented him for allowing himself to be captivated by her
beauty; the other part of me wanted to deny that it was happening.
Sylvia hated me, and what I wanted to do most was get away from all
the hostility, to the place where I found my serenity - with Heath.
And if there was any consolation prize in it for me, it was my
undivided time with his brother that made Ayden crazy jealous.

The situation began to escalate as the weeks
went on, with no storms or fog to keep Ayden locked in his tower
for days on end, which would have distracted him from his problems.
While he was working around the island, I felt him watch me as I
made my way to Heath’s quarters, where I spent almost every waking
hour.

It was almost bittersweet to watch Heath
recover, grow stronger, and fill out as he regained his appetite,
because I knew he wouldn’t need me anymore. I began to crave his
time and attention and enjoyed our talks and recollections of
earlier days on the island. The book,
Tom Sawyer,
inspired
fond memories of our childhood antics. I caught onto Heath’s
laughter when he spoke of Halloween night and the mischief we’d
created.

“I remember how we opened the gate to Mr.
Powell’s farm and let the cows loose, only to find out from your
father the next morning that it was one of our own cows we had let
go,” I giggled, thinking back.

“My father kept remarkably calm, given the
situation,” Heath said with a light chuckle.

“I was glad everything turned out fine in the
end, and the cow made it to the island. It was wonderful having
fresh milk with supper.”

“Everything always works out in the end,” he
said sleepily, yawning through his smile. He rested his hand over
mine as he drifted into a light afternoon nap.

I did go to the mainland to retrieve the
mail, and when I returned, I sat and read him inspirational letters
from Elizabeth and his parents, though he was still unaware of the
sporadic letters addressed to him that I had secretly placed under
my mattress. I had moved the pile of letters from my dresser, far
from Sylvia’s snooping eyes. I was well aware that she came into my
room when I was with Heath, and I managed to hide all my most
precious belongings under Heath’s bed when he was sleeping.

By Sunday, Heath was out of bed, the natural
rosy color had returned to his handsome face, and the dreadful
coughing had greatly subsided. He was clean and freshly shaven, no
longer possessing a thick, bushy blond moustache. He insisted we
walk outside in the fresh, brisk autumn air. Heath had something
important to tell me, he continued to say, but I always insisted he
wait until he was well.

“Don’t weigh yourself down with anything that
has to do with me,” I repeated each time he would look at me with
his worried stare. “When you get better, then you can reveal
anything you feel I need to know.”

When I said this, I believed Heath was about
to confess his love for me. Not as a brother-in-law or as a friend,
but the way a man loves a woman, the same way Daddy felt for Momma.
I saw it in his eyes. I felt it when we were near to one another,
and I sensed it when I was far away. However, I was not embracing
the idea that Heath loved me the way I had always dreamed. In fact,
I feared the moment he would give his confession, and I put it off
as long as I could. What would I do with that information? I asked
myself each night as I tried to fall asleep. I loved Ayden; I truly
did. I wasn’t ready to give up on my vows, yet I could never love
him the way I loved Heath. And it didn’t help the way he was
treating me - the way he habitually flirted with Sylvia and allowed
her to follow him just about everywhere. The more I resisted Ayden,
the more he gave his attention to her. Little did Ayden realize
that Hazel had become all too aware, and with great discretion, so
as not to humiliate Ayden or me, convinced James that Sylvia needed
to go to school. It was her way of discreetly solving the pressing
problem.

“Sylvia isn’t learning a thing here at the
station. She sleeps all hours and is never near when I call. She
pretends to be interested in learning the duties of a keeper.” I
overheard her tell James that same morning. They were in the
kitchen, and I stood outside the window listening carefully. I knew
how much was riding on Sylvia’s going to school. She would be away
from Ayden all day and banned from spending any more time in the
watchtower with him.

“Sylvia is interested. Why do you think she
spends so much time up there?” he asked, apparently clueless and
unaware of Sylvia’s infatuation with my husband. “What exactly are
you saying, Hazel?”

There was a short pause between them, and
then Hazel sounded as if she were becoming irritated with James’
resistance to the idea. “She is going to school, starting
tomorrow.”

“Whatever you say, dear. You know best when
it comes to the children.”

With one burden lifted from my shoulders, I
gazed up at Heath, who was staring intently out into the vast
expanse of churning sea. He was obviously contemplating how to
reveal what had plagued him for such a great while. I’d held off a
confession long enough. I gulped hard, finally ready to allow his
words of love to sound in my ears. I had put my fears aside and
decided to relish the moment - the one I had waited what seemed a
lifetime for.

Indeed, I was married to Ayden - Heath’s
brother - and thus was unobtainable, but my heart soared just to
think Heath had finally let his guard down, opened his eyes, and
really seen me for the first time. No longer did Heath see me as a
sensitive little girl, I believed, or a grown woman who had,
unfortunately, ended up on the wrong side of the tracks. I believed
that I had finally stolen in and melted his heart, and that he
embraced not only my outer beauty, but also my inner radiance.

“Lillian,” Heath began tentatively, with an
outwardly heavy heart and deep emotion. His eyes locked onto mine
as we stood before one another with the chilly ocean wind whipping
through our hair. Nothing and no one mattered at that moment. I was
swept away in my own foolish belief that Heath could love me, and
that I could love him, yet remain true to Ayden and to my wedding
vows.

“Yes, Heath?” I said wistfully and took hold
of his gloved hands. My heart was racing with excitement as I
waited on edge to hear him say to me, “
I love you,
Lillian.”

If Ayden was anywhere near, watching Heath
and me stand close to one another, I didn’t care. This moment was
mine to treasure, and was one I had wished for long before I gave
my life and promise of love to Ayden.

“I want to thank you for taking care of me,
for your unconditional devotion. You have been my angel, and if it
wasn‘t for you, I‘m not certain I would have recovered. The weeks I
lay in bed while you nursed me back to health gave me so much time
to reflect. I know I didn’t deserve such loving care, after all I
have put you through.”

“That is all in the past. I forgive you,” I
said through my happy glow.

“Please, let me finish,” he insisted, lightly
squeezing my hands.

I bit my lower lip so I couldn’t smile, so I
wouldn’t intimidate him with my joy.

“Since my return, I have been cruel to you,
and I am deeply ashamed. There are no excuses for my behavior. I
feel terrible. Just terrible. I would give anything to change what
happened and all you’ve been through. It isn‘t fair how you‘ve
suffered so.”

Heath released my hands, then reached out to
caress my cold cheeks. “I wish I could go back in time and save you
from Richard Parker and the nightmare he dragged you into.”

By now, I was panicking inside. Something
about the distress on his face filled me with unexpected alarm. My
heart fluttered madly in my tightening chest. My throat suddenly
dried. Why did he mention Richard in what was going to be his love
declaration? I worried. It was odd, and it disturbed me.
Nevertheless, I attempted to remain calm and confident, and, still
believing this was heading to a confession of love, allowed Heath
to continue.

“I know I can’t fix what happened to you.
There is no magical time machine that can go back, change the past,
and bring me to you once again, only this time to save you from
Richard and Judith and the life they threw you into. However, I am
here now, and I intend to protect you. I know it is truly Ayden’s
place, and he has every right to be the one to keep you safe. After
all,
he
is your husband. I am here to tell you, that no
matter what, you can count on me, even when you feel all others
have failed you.”

Although his words didn’t sound like a
traditional love pronouncement, I was elated to know Heath was
there for me, like no other. He was going to protect me the way
Daddy protected Momma. Nothing else was going to matter but my
happiness and well-being from now on. Heath was always my gallant
knight in shining armor!