Authors: P.L. Jenkins
“Don’t you call me La, only my friends can call me that? And you are NOT my friend.” I hiss in his face falls and I see the hurt and anger flash before his eyes. He steps closer to me and leans down so we are eye level.
“I am your friend. Whether you want to believe it or not. I am the one who stood by you and felt the pain with you as you cried over the hurt from that so called family of yours. I am the one who lost his brother the same one that you claimed to love. And I am the one you ran to when you got bad news. So yes sweetheart I am your friend.” His chest is raising and falling so hard that I can’t do anything, but stare. He’s right, but he also lied.
“Friends don’t lie.” Was all I could whisper?
“I did lie, but damnit do you know how much trouble you are? You are walking talking trouble. I could lose my job if they found out that I kissed and almost fucked you. I lied, because when it came down to it I could lie. It was a mobile app I used for J and my real number for Brandon. You are like the devil and all I want to do is lose my sin in you. I don’t get it. I have never felt this way. So yeah I lied.” He was right. He could get into trouble, I knew he could, but it was hard to resist him too. When outside of school he was this carefree person as if there wasn’t an age difference.
“Well then I will walk away from you. I will leave you alone other than hanging with Ashley and Gage I won’t contact, talk, or make sexy remarks. So there. I am going to bed. Bye Brandon.” I walk away back in the house as I hear him mumble shit under his breathe. I walk over to the couch and see that Gage and Ashley are gone, they must have went to the guest room. I slip back into my room and lay on the bed. Unable to sleep I turn Spotify on my phone and Collide comes through the speakers. I stare at the ceiling thinking if this is the man upstairs plan. Let me have control for two years and the final year have my life come crashing down before me. Giving me so many obstacles that I can’t seem to figure out which way is up. Funny because I am looking up but feel as though I am not. I can’t help but laugh. Really though what is different? I saw a quest tried to conquer him and in the end I got played at my own game. I need to stick with guys who are not teachers. That is rule number one. I need a new quest. I hear a faint knock on my door, I roll over as a new song begins to play Superman (It’s not easy) I feel the burn of the tears as I hear the door open and slid across the carpet. I feel the bed shift as someone sits on it. I wait for them to speak.
“La, I know that you’re awake. I am your bff after all.” I laugh as I hear Ashley talk.
“Ash, I am so confused. My head is about to explode.” She laughs.
“Well you did get mind fuck today so that is normal. La, don’t you think that you should hear him out?” I shake my head, I don’t want to talk about it.
“La, we have been through hell and back and stared fear in the eye. There was one point while I saw you laid up in the hospital bed that you were gone. I can’t lose you now. What happened to “I get what I want” where is that girl? This one that lays here listening to stupid shit is not you.” I look around and think about it all. She is right. This isn’t me.
“Okay, it’s time for La to come back, but I’m not talking to him. I already heard him out so I choose to walk away. I choose to. And after everything you should know that I need to be the one to choose for myself.” She nods as she walk out of the room. This is going to be an interesting year and we are only at end of September.
CHAPTER 5
I hate that I had to say goodbye to my brother last night. If it weren’t for the suspension last month then I would have missed school today. Ashley has been there through it all, but also has been through a lot with Gage as well. I am not jealous I am happy that she’s able to find the one again. I on the other hand have not. I have slept around a lot more than normal. It’s part of my coping. My dad promised that they would be here for the holidays, but I am not expecting it. Mark told me that if I didn’t want him to go he wouldn’t. It’s what he wanted and I wasn’t going to rob him of that. I am staring into the mirror looking at the person before me who has slowly started to disappear before my eyes. This girl looking back was not the same one that started this year. My mom made me see a counselor and I was diagnose with depression. Well shit any one would when you bring up the death of someone that you caused, and a grandma and family who hate you. After I was cleared to be alone a month later they hauled ass to Nevada. It was like really? Whatever. I changed my number to stay away from Brandon and made sure that other than at school. I didn’t speak to him. After the second week he gave up typical male. I hear noise coming from the stairs. I finish my makeup and head that way knowing who is here.
“Ready bitch?” I laugh as I grab my purse off the table in the foyer.
“Let’s go. So what are we doing Halloween tonight?” She beams as we get into the car. I grab my seat belt letting my eyes roam to Brandon’s house. Once it was an escape. Now is a hurting place for my heart.
“So there is this underground fighting that Gage has been talking about. I went to one last week and oh my god La it is amazing. So Gage told me on the way here that he got a phone call from his buddy that there is one going down tonight. It is the last one before the break. So I told him I’d ask if you wanted to go. So do you? He misses you actually the whole frat house does. So afterwards we can go party it up there. Huh?” I look at her. I feel bad neglecting the frat boys.
“I am game, but I’m going to turn this song up, because it is awesome.” We laugh as we sing Here by Hellogoodbye all the way to school. We jump out and she does her famous prep talk before I walk into first period.
“La, you are a strong woman who can make it through the day without Mr. AH being on your mind. Okay?” I laugh. I answer him with “Yes Mr. AH” he assumes it’s a cute nickname, but it means asshole so it makes me laugh.
“Love you slut.” She laughs as we part ways. I know I am late the moment I reach the second floor and the bell rings. Shit. I still have a floor to go. I run up the stairs and it was like Déjà vu all over again. Only this time I knock into a guy who has blue jeans that were just fucking sexy, a Hollister shirt, and converse. I look up and was met with these bright blue eyes staring at me. I felt like he could see right through me.
“Sorry about that. I should have been watching for pretty girls running upstairs. My old school didn’t have a second floor let alone a third.” I can’t think straight. He has this buzz cut head and looks like he was made to fuck.
“Yeah whatever. I am late. Bye.” I grab my binder off the floor and rush into class. Holy hell he was hot. I rush in and like always the whole class including the asshole turns to me and stares. Yeah I’m late, big deal.
“Miss. Clark. Do you have a tardy pass?” I sit my bags on the desk and glare at him.
“No, but I will be more than happy to go get one.”
“No that won’t be necessary, but maybe keep it in mind for next time. Last warning.” I wave my hand. He begins talking about the newest project that we have to complete over damn music. The history of our favorite band and why. Blah blah blah. I know stupid right? I scribble the notes on my note book while I catch a glimpse of John trying to get my attention.
“Hey La, did you hear about the underground fighting?” I laugh and nod my head. I hear the door open and close, but pay no attention to it. Until dipshit starts talking.
“Class we have a new student from Texas. His name is Jax and I guess you will be sitting by the lovely Miss Clark.” I yank my head towards the front to see the new kid walking towards me and I wouldn’t be damned if it wasn’t blue eyes himself.
“Well hello. It’s different to see you sitting instead of flat on your ass.” I laugh as he sits next to me.
“Oh funny you got jokes. Cute.” He laughs and I glance down to see Brandon glaring at me. I wave causing him to try not to smile.
“I am Jax and you are?” I glance at him damn Jax even sounds hot.
“Lannie I have a feeling we may become best friends.” He laughs as he begins taking notes. I couldn’t help, but smile. He was what I need and hot as well. Once the bell rings I see him stay in his seat. I hope he had homeroom here too. This was where we could really talk.
“So Lannie, I am assuming that Mr. Jones homeroom is also this class.” I nod and then the lovely Ashley makes her appearance.
“Hey Mr. AH hope that you are doing well. Lannie oh my god you will never guess what bitch I just told off.” I laugh as Mr. Jones intercepted.
“Miss Rogers do I need to remind you of the cussing?” She looks over her shoulder and narrows her eyes at him.
“Do I need to remind you of little something, something?” His eyes widen and I laugh. “Didn’t think so. Anyways La, oh who is this?” She was staring at Jax and he was looking a bit scared.
“This is my new friend. Jax. He’s going with me tonight.” She’s speechless and then I hear the breaking of a pencil as my eyes look down, Mr. Jones was out the door in heartbeat.
“Oh well aren’t you yummy. I’m Ashley, La’s best friend.” He laughs as he looks at me confused.
“Apparently I am Lannie’s date to whatever tonight. Jax.” He shakes her hand as I stare at the front. I need to get my shit together or I was going to fail. I have applied to NYU and been waiting to hear back from them.
“Well good, because the last douche was well a AH.” I choke on nothing as she says that.
“You okay La?” I nod before getting up and heading towards the door to get a drink from the water fountain. I look to see Brandon pacing the halls taking a breather. He looks up and his eyes land on me and I saw hurt in them. I shrug as I go to the water fountain. He walks up, leans against the wall and I wait.
“What is going on with you?” I am confused as hell.
“Nothing I am just embracing the old me. Fuck em and leave em. Right?” I walk off hearing him mumble something. I walk back in and see Jax and Ashley chatting up a storm. Well she is anyways. This day needs to be good.
After homeroom school really flowed, I told Jax I was kidding about tonight that underground fights don’t just allow anyone and with him being new I am not sure it would be okay. Ashley and I drive home and start getting ready. I am unsure of what to wear, but after looking through my closet I decide on the perfect outfit. It’s going to be this black halter top dress and red pump heels. It’s killer and I look hot as hell once I did my makeup and hair. Around seven thirty the doorbell rings, which means that Gage is here.
“Holly hell! Trying to give a guy a heart attack?” We laugh as we rode to the underground fighting. I’m more nervous about the party afterwards. What If Brandon is there? Damnit if I didn’t need a drink now. Right before we enter the abandoned building my phone rang. Without thinking I answer it.
“Hello.” I pause as I wait to see who it was.
“Yes I am looking for a Lannie Clark?” I wave Ashley and Gage to go ahead. It was about to start and this could be the college.
“This is her. May I ask who this is?” My hearts pounding ninety to nothing.
“This is officer Trout. With the Nevada police station. There was accident and I found your number as the emergency contact.” Oh no.
“Umm, yes. Who was in the accident?” I can’t breathe I feel the air becoming thick and I feel dizzy as her next words knock me off my feet.
“Well seeing how your states away I am guessing I can tell you. They were in a car wreck and the doctors tried everything, but they were unable to bring them back. They were pronounced dead.” Oh my god Mark.
“Umm who was?” Mark was the only thing my mind could concentrate on.
“Your parents, sweetie. I have social services picking your brother up until you arrive.” Just in an instant I was a legal guardian of my brother and parentless. My mind wandered back to what the last thing I said to them. Did I even tell them that I love them? That they were it for me?
“I’ll book a plane ticket right now. Thank you Ma’am.” I hang up unable to control my balance as I fall to the concrete ground trying to breathe before the panic attack took over and I black out on this nasty concrete sidewalk.
CHAPTER 6
I hate waking up and not knowing where I am at or who I am with. I hear the humming of the air which snaps back to reality. I am on a plane to Nevada. I can’t believe that this is happening to me. I have lost my parents and now will be the sole provider of my little brother. Makes me sick that nobody in that family would take him for the night, and that social services had to get him and take him to a foster home for the damn night.
“La, you okay?” I glance across the seat from me and stare into Ashley and Gage’s eyes. They found me passed out, I am assuming after the fight. Halloween will officially suck after these events.
“I will be okay.” I turn and look out in the sky. I can’t even think of how Mark is doing. I knew Nevada was a bad place. And yet they figured it was the safest place to take Mark.
“La, talk to me. Tell me what is going on in that mind of yours please?” I turn and see Ashley’s swollen tear stained face staring at me. I give a weak smile as I try to focus on when I can have Mark in my head. I am not in the mood to talk to no one. I mean I am not even eighteen yet, I can’t legally have Mark. Can I? I hear the flight attendant inform us that we are landing soon. I wander back to the phone call that I received. How in that moment aside from these two people I truly have no friends. I have the fake friends that either want to be my friend, because I have access to all these parties that no one else does, or the male friends who only want in my pants. I don’t even have a real companion that I can turn to in this emotional crisis. I knew that my parents had a plot in Florida and that me being the child that I do have say as to where there buried at. Thank goodness for that, because If it where up to my dad’s side family I wouldn’t be able to go or have them close by. I exit the plane. I see my feet moving, but my mind and body is numb.
“Ash, why don’t La and you go wait outside. I will get our bags and meet you guys out there.” Ashley links her arms with me as soon as we hit outside it was as if I were knocked back to myself. I stare at Ashley as the tears well up in my eyes. She grabs me and pulls me close as I lose it. I have no parents. At one time I hated them for choosing the life style they lived over there kids. I am not sure what happened, but when they came back at the beginning of school year it was a complete one eighty. Even though they did move far away.
“La, you want me to call someone? Anyone?” I look at her and for some reason Brandon flashes through my mind. I stare at Ashley as Gage walks up and wraps his arm around her waist. For the last two years I wanted to live with fuck buddies, never committing to one human. Or at least not while I was young. I think that I do though; I want someone to be mine, be there for me, and love me like I was the only one on earth. The only problem was the one that I developed feelings for was my stupid teacher for the remainder of the year.
“La?” I look up and shake my head. I hop into the cab and give him the address to the foster home where I can pick Mark up. The only issue was I had to go straight to the lawyer office to go over the will.
We pull up to the lawyer office just a little after nine in the morning. Mark is so shaken up by the whole thing he hasn’t let go of my arm. I am nervous and scared as to what the lawyer is going to say.
“La, Gage and I will wait outside while you go figure this out. If you need anything just let me know.” I nod as I grab Marks hand and go inside the building. I hear the door chime to indicate that we were here. An older woman looks up from her desk and smiles kindly at me. I wasn’t in a smiling mood so all I could do was walk over there.
“I am here to see Martin? I am Lannie Clark.” She glances down at the book and raises her head slowly and with pity in her eyes.
“Yes Ma’am right this way.” I look over at Mark.
“Mark, honey I need you to wait out here please. Okay?” He nods as he takes a seat in one of the chairs. I inhale a breath as I walk into the office.
“Miss. Clark please has a seat.” I sit down thinking that this can’t go well by the look he is giving me.
“Just tell me how it is. I know that look.” He runs his hands through his ashy grey hair.
“Okay so you’re not legal age to take custody of Mark. You have to be eighteen in the US and you are seventeen. So unless you have an alternate person who is willing to adopt him until your legal age, I am afraid that he will go into the care of your aunt and uncle.” My heart drops once he said that. They would never let me see him and they would suck the amount of money he has out before he is of age to touch it.
“How long do I have? To find someone?” He looks at me and nods.
“Tomorrow is it. You may take him back to the hotel with you, but you must be here at nine in the morning with a guardian or I am afraid they will get him.” I stand up as a knock comes over the door.
“That is my next appointment. Remember nine sharp or its kidnapping.” I nod as I walk out the door. Mark runs up to me and my heart sank. What am I going to do? We walk outside and Ashley looks at me.
“We’ll talk at the hotel.” She nods. As we drove to the house to get his clothes. I couldn’t go in. I refused to. I stood there on the sidewalk smoking a cigarette thinking of how bad this has gotten. This maybe the last time I ever see my brother. I could ask Ashley’s mom, but I am not sure if she will and I shouldn’t burden her. She has done enough for me as it is. Gage and Mark came out as we head to the hotel.
We make it to the hotel and Mark is hungry so Gage and he went to go get food while I talk to Ashley. We step out onto the balcony.
“So if I don’t find a legal guardian that will take Mark who is at least eighteen then my aunt and uncle get him. I don’t want to ask your mom, because she has done enough. I know she will, but that isn’t an option. I need another person. The only issue is, I am lost at who can.” She stares at me and is just as lost as I am.
“La, I don’t know who else either. Gage would, but he doesn’t live in a suitable house for a kid.” I smiled a little for the first time really. Gage would, but she’s right.
“What if he moved in my house with me? I mean I have the room and the house is paid for and it’s not going to be sold until I leave for college, but now I am not sure I am going to NY.” She smiles.
“Let me talk to him. That may work.” She hugs me as we go inside. I haven’t had any sleep and it was finally catching up to me. I lied down and that was it.
The alarm sounds at eight in the morning and I hurry up and get ready. I read the text from Ashley that said she will meet us at the lawyer office. I was hoping that she talked to Gage and he agreed to do it. I prayed he did. I woke Mark up and we left and headed to the lawyer office. The same routine that always happens when we checked in, told Mark to wait and I went back into the office.
“Miss. Clark. So did you find someone?” I look at the clock and wonder where in the hell they were at.
“I am not sure. I had someone who was going to meet me here, but she isn’t here. So I am assuming not.” Just then a knock comes from the door, and I let a breath out as I realize it was Gage and Ashley. Or at least I thought. The door opens and there he stood staring at me. I shake my head, sure I was seeing things, but once I opened my eyes he was still there.
“Miss. Clark is this person?” I glance back to Martin and before I can say anything I was interrupted.
“Hello sir. My name is Brandon Jones. I am twenty four with a teaching job. I live in my own house and very stable. No other kids, wife, or even pets. With of course Lannie’s permission I would love to take custody of Mark Clark.” I almost faint at what came out of Brandon’s mouth. Is he serious?
“Well Miss Clark?” I glance back at Martin and felt the tears burning my eyes. He was serious? He wanted to help me and this by far is the most helpful thing that I need.
“Umm well I guess he is Mark’s guardian.” Martin smiles and hands Brandon so many forms to fill out. I wait in the seat next to Brandon as I stare at him wondering how on earth he got here, and who. This man is my savor and I know that without doubt my heart belongs to him. Although we will never be.
“Okay, just allow thirty days for the judge to sign off and there will be a social worker in Florida popping in within the thirty days to do a home visit. You can take him today. The house in Nevada is awarded to both Mark and Lannie. As well as all the assets. The house in Florida is yours Lannie. And the bank accountants. The life insurances will be spilt into two and Mark will not have access to his until he is eighteen. With that being said. I hope that you have a wonderful life with your brother.” I nod as I walk out and run up to Mark hugging him. I see Gage and Ashley standing there smiling at us.
“I am sorry I didn’t tell you, but Gage thought that you may have wanted someone a little more suitable for Mark. We called Brandon. Lannie, he didn’t even question it as he hopped on the first flight and had us pick him up. I was scared we weren’t going to make in time. I am glad we did.” I hug her and then Gage. As Brandon walks out of Martin office. I look up and stare into his brown dark eyes and run up to him and hug him. He pauses a moment before wrapping his arms around me. I cry for everything that has happened and everything that has yet to happen. We let go and all I could do was silently thank him as I walk out of the office. We drove back to the house that was my parents. So we could pack up the stuff that we needed to move to Brandon’s house. He told Mark that he would be living with him, but not to worry, because I would be only two houses away. Mark was still in shock and once we entered the house I felt hurt. This is where my parents lived, started a life. Yet the things that surround the house seem nothing more than things. No memories, no photos, nothing. I inhale a breathe as I began to pack the stuff that we were taking and the things we were keeping here. I was still undecided on what to do with this house. Do I sell or keep it? Ashley had called her mom to tell her what was going on and surprisingly she told Brandon she would get a sub so he could focus on Mark and get him enrolled in school. I was almost done when the doorbell rang. I hurried down stairs and was face to face with my uncle.
“Hello Lannie, where is Mark at? We are taking him home.” I laugh. I am assuming he hadn’t got the memo.
“Hello sir, I beg to differ. He is now in the soul custody of a Mr. Brandon Jones. Not you or your pathetic wife.” I saw anger flash in his eyes as he rose his hand to hit me I winched waiting for the blow when all of sudden I hear his voice.
“You will not lay a hand on her. I am not sure who in the hell you are, but she is not your property to abuse. I am assuming by the look that you must be her uncle. I have heard enough about you people to know that this is no way to treat a person let alone your niece. If you loved your brother at all you would walk away and not do this. Or I personally will see to it that your ass rots in jail.” My uncle stands there glaring at me.
“I am not leaving without Mark. So I advise you to tell her to get him than I will be on my way.” He crosses his arms over his chest.
“See this little paper? This says by the state of Nevada and Florida that I have legal custody of Mark. So like I said you best leave before I make it my mission to put you behind bars.” My uncle takes the paper from Brandon after reading it throws it at him and leaves. I was worried though, I am sure that this isn’t the last I have seen of him.
“Thank you Brandon. Let’s go get Mark and leave. I will call the movers when I get to Florida, but for now let’s go.” He nods as he kisses my cheek and walks off. In that slight moment I picture living a life with Brandon, doing the couple things in public, talking about life in general. Mostly I could see us growing old together.
“You ready?” I look up to see Ashley standing there with a bag. I nod my head and lock up the house. I go to the garage and saw that my dad had his car in there. It was his favorite car. Audi SUV black with chrome wheels. And then an idea hits me. Everything they own I own now. I run back into the house and search for his keys just as the house phone rang. I go over and answer it.
“Hello?” I wait.
“Yes is this Miss. Lannie Clark?” Who was this?
“Yes this is she.” I’m a little nervous.
“This is the funeral home. We are shipping your parents out to Florida tomorrow, but there is a gentleman here trying to take possession of them now. What do you want me to do?” My uncle flashes in my head.
“Ma’am whatever you do don’t give them to anyone. It is just a family member not wanting them to go to Florida. Here is my cell number call me if you have any other problems and do not release them to anyone please.” I tell her my number and hang up as I go into my parents’ bedroom and froze. It’s so neatly cleaned and everything was made and put away. It looks as though they have been here. I go to nightstand hoping that his keys were there like they have always been. I laugh as I see them sitting there, I go to pick them up when I glance at a photo that my dad has on his nightstand. It was of my mom and I, my hair was tied into a side braid and my mom whispering into my ear as I giggled and whoever captured the moment took it perfectly. I had to be around four or five when this was taken. The only problem was we were in front of a house that I didn’t recognize.