The Wild Duchess/The Willful Duchess (The Duchess Club Book 1) (25 page)

“I-I cannot believe you mean it. Or you don’t really know what you are offering to do.”

“I should have said all of this before when I proposed the first time. But when you said no and then tied it to the destruction of all your hopes and dreams if I overturned your decision—I was set back on my heels.”

“You could be telling me what I want to hear. Once we’re married, you could say you changed your mind and…I wouldn’t have the strength to leave you, Ryder.”

“Let’s make a promise to never discuss leaving each other. Agreed?”

“Agreed.”

“I’ll put it in writing, Starr. I’ll have lawyers draw it up and your father can approve the negotiations. I will indenture myself to you as my wife and be the first duke voluntarily held in permanent formal bondage in English history. What do you say?”

“I say yes.”

“Yes?”

“Why do you look so surprised?” she asked.

“I thought it would be harder.”

“More difficult than pledging to legally become my property? I’m not sure how much more of a challenge I would like to be, your lordship.”

“Noted. We’ll set the bar there and try not to jump over it.” He smiled. “Every man in England is going to think me insane.”

“Are you worried?”

“Not in the slightest!” He laughed. “It
is
liberating to give yourself over to the will of the woman you love! What a revelation!”

I am going to have to thank my father-in-law every single day I take in air!

“
S
carlett
?”

“I haven’t decided. Please don’t ask me, Your Grace.”

“I understand. I didn’t come here tonight to pressure you in any way. It really is one of the last large balls of the Season and I couldn’t resist. We opened the Season, you and I. It felt right to close it out.”

Her breath caught in her throat. “Don’t. Don’t speak of beginnings and endings! This is torture. You know it is torture.”

He smiled. “I did admit I was selfish. You are right.” He sighed. “Tell me, Scarlett. Tell me one thing I do not know about you yet. Something I wouldn’t guess.”

“Very well,” Scarlett did her best to recover her composure. “I cannot sew.”

“That’s not very interesting. Come on, Blackwell Beauty, surely you can top that!”

“Let’s see,” Scarlett said as she bit her lower lip to think. “I secretly posed for a portrait, entirely clothed mind you, for my friend, Miss Ivy Hastings.”

“How daring!”

“You’re teasing me but I’ll allow it. It
was
very daring, Your Grace. It is simply not done.”

“But you did it.” He was all smiles as they made their turns. “Why?”

“Because of the Duchess Club.”

“The what?”

“When we were younger, my friends and I, we formed a little club called the Duchess Club. It was very silly and very secret but we swore to support each other’s dreams and to rule the world.”

“Very ambitious,” he said warmly.

“If Ivy wishes to paint, then I must do all I can to support her. If Starr wishes to teach on the moon, then I must find a way to build a ladder tall enough for her to get there. Do you understand?”

“Yes. How will you manage to rule the world?” he asked.

“I haven’t figured that part out yet but I wonder if what we meant was to rule our world. If we can manage our own…place in the world, then perhaps we can change it for the better.”

The music came to a halt and Elgin had to force himself to let her go.

“I believe you will do just that, Miss Blackwell. I believe you are well on your way.”

He bowed over her fingertips, kissed her gloved hand lightly and released her to return to her family.

S
tafford spotted
Ashe Blackwell easily enough and made his way purposefully across the room to intercept them. There was no sign of Scarlett or her twin, but for now, that suited him perfectly.

“Mrs. Blackwell.” Talon bowed politely, pleased to see her out at last.
She may be the ally I need tonight to win my case.
“You are stunningly beautiful this evening.”

“She is
always
beautiful,” Ashe amended. “Tonight is no exception and my daughters are the same. Well, it was nice seeing you again. I should see if Galen is here to—”

“A word, sir, before you go. If I may…just a few minutes of your time.” Talon wasn’t willing to risk waiting again.

“Ashe,” Caroline said softly. “We mustn’t be so quick to abandon good company.” She looked to Talon. “It’s been so long. The last the girls saw of you was at Kempton Park, was it not?”

Talon shook his head. “I have had the honor to cross paths with them since then at the Royal Museum and…Hyde Park.”

“I apologize then,” Caroline said. “I’ve been unwell and haven’t followed things as closely as a mother should. I know that your friendship means a great deal to my daughters and particularly to Scarlett.”

Ashe cleared his throat. “Scarlett is very sweet and has been known to befriend nearly everyone who pretends kindness. I am working on her ability to discern better.”

“Ashe!” Caroline squeezed his arm in shock.

“Mr. Blackwell,” Talon said as calmly as he could manage. “I intend to marry Scarlett. I have written her a dozen notes to make that intention clear to no avail.”

“Paper makes for excellent kindling and I suspect your notes have gone unread. Lord Winters conveyed to me that you were already engaged. Perhaps that has made your messages more prone to burst into flames? I wouldn’t know, of course.”

“Ashe, did you burn his notes?! Wait, did you say he was e-engaged?” Caroline whispered, the misery in her eyes like a physical blow to Talon’s chest.

“I am
not
already engaged and have made no effort to secure anyone but Scarlett’s affections.” Talon held his ground. “That is the truth of it.”

“Have you made this clear to the young girl who it is rumored is in Town to buy her wedding trousseau? For apparently the Lady Gastonbury has missed the news about her daughter’s situation.”

Damn it.

“I will amend that immediately. I haven’t said anything to her because it never occurred to me that I needed to formally break an engagement I
never
formally entered into.” Stafford took a deep breath. “It is a misunderstanding only.”

Ashe’s expression was stone. “Misunderstandings are like mushrooms. They spring up when a man is standing in shit and forgets what it is like to have sunlight on his face.”

“Ashe! Language!” Caroline was growing more and more desperate to avert an argument but at the same time, desperate to understand what was happening and how it affected her Scarlett. “Your Grace?”

“Mrs. Blackwell, I am an honorable man. Rumors do not serve either one of us. I have nothing to do with Lady Gastonbury’s daughter Lavinia—no matter how much the woman wishes otherwise.”

“Yet you entertained them in your home? The subject did not come up at all during, say, a private dinner?”

Talon’s heart stuttered to a halt, instantly caught between horror and anger. “Are you
watching
my house? Are you
spying
on me, Blackwell?”

“Why does everyone keep forgetting that I am a man with resources?” Ashe crossed his arms defensively. “And no, I have not tracked your every movement. A friend was driving on the street and mentioned that he’d seen the Gastonbury party stepping through your front door and naturally coupled with the rumors of your engagement, it caught his eye and he deemed it worth repeating.”

“Your friend has thoughtlessly caused you unnecessary concern.”

“Dr. Rowan West is her godfather and seemed very clear in his opinion that you were a man worth watching. He refused to tell me why but he has his reservations about your character. I trust him implicitly.”

Damn it, this is not improving. It was West who saw us in the garden at Amersham’s and must have seen more than he indicated that day.

“Mr. Blackwell, I wish to marry Scarlett because I love her.”

“How does she feel about you?” Ashe asked.

“I…believe she loves me, too. If I can speak to Scarlett with your blessing, I will be certain of her feelings.”

“If you are uncertain of her feelings, I would like to know why.”

“We may have had a falling out recently. If my notes had been delivered and read then she and I would have been long past it by now,” Talon tried not to bite off the words but it was difficult to hide his frustration. “The matter is between us, sir. She can refuse me if she wishes but I will have it from her directly and not from you.”

“No? You ask for my blessing and then tell me you will insist on stepping around me?”

“Ashe,” Caroline spoke again, more quietly but with a new edge of desperation in her voice. “Things are not always what they appear to be. Remember when we were young and you—”

“No! We are not revisiting our history to bolster this man’s proposal! He wishes to marry her? When did he call in person? Not after that first time when he admitted he needed to apologize to her! When did he call again? Never! When did he ask to see her with our permission or make any decent attempt at courtship? Not any to my knowledge! Every meeting was an
accident
of coincidence or him squirreling into Chesterton’s place! I may not be acquainted with many dukes but I don’t think I wish to be acquainted with this man or to—”

Caroline’s grip on Ashe’s arm tightened and she sobbed or coughed or…Stafford couldn’t really tell except that she was suddenly bent over her husband’s arm, her color changing so fast it was like a strange optical illusion.

“Caroline?” Ashe whispered, alarm flooding his features.

She slid to the floor but Ashe caught her before she struck the hard surface, just barely caught her to soften the blow. “Caroline!”

Her eyes grew wide and wild with pain and she convulsed against him, then wretched up blood that was so dark it was nearly black onto her husband’s shirt front. Talon knelt next to him, unsure of what he could do. Someone called for a doctor and the chaos and horror of the moment rippled out as both men knelt in her blood and tried to hold on for dear life.

Talon looked into Ashe Blackwell’s face and knew that his marriage proposal was a lost cause—now and forever.

A
t the Blackwell
home that night, Gayle attended Caroline, but Rowan was there, too, both of them moving with urgent speed, each battling to keep Ashe calm as they worked in tandem to outpace Caroline’s discomfort and see what could be done for her.

They knew from experience not to ask Ashe to leave the room.

“There’s a new way to make a party unforgettable, dearest,” Ashe teased her gently as he held her hand.

“You must…change your shirt.”

“What?” He looked down, horrified to realize he was still covered in her blood. “Of course. I don’t wish my appearance to distress you, darling. I’ll be right back. I cannot lower my standards, can I?”

He kissed her hand and retreated at a run to find his valet and to change immediately.

“Gayle,” Caroline whispered. “I think I ruined Fitzwalter’s carpets, too. Remind me…to send a note of apology.”

Gayle smiled. “Of course. There’s a composition they haven’t yet covered in the etiquette books!”

“I do…like to be original.”

“Caroline, save your strength,” Rowan instructed her gently. “I think the bleeding is under control though we’re not sure yet. So I want you to lie as still as you can and take whatever medicine I give you. Do you hear me? We can debate about the inherent properties of organic medicine versus man-made formulations another day.”

“As you wish,” Caroline acquiesced without debate, a sure sign that she was in pain. Rowan gave her a dose of a bitter liquid to dull her discomfort and then pulled out his stethoscope to try to determine her status.

Ashe was back so quickly it caught them all by surprise.

“There, I am fit for presentation again!” He sat by her bedside. “Did I miss anything?”

“Where are the girls?”

“Home. They arrived a few minutes ago. Lord Hayle saw to everything.”

“You like him, don’t you?” she asked.

“He asked Starr to marry him again and she accepted him. I am in shock but yes, I like him. A little bit. It makes no sense but…when he brought flowers that first time and you should have seen the look on his face, he was so obviously already gone for her.”

“Ashe,” she said, weakly squeezing his fingers. “Stafford…”

Ashe shook his head. “I don’t want to talk about him, dearest.”

“I…do. Please.”

“Very well,” Ashe sighed, kissing her hand and each fingertip. “You win. It is a wicked way to win, but I can refuse you nothing when you are ill.”

“We’ll give you some privacy,” Gayle offered. “I’ll go check on the girls and Rowan will be seated right outside the door.”

“Thank you.” Ashe looked over at his friend, a world of anxiety hanging in the air between them.

Once the door closed behind the Wests, Ashe turned his full attention to Caroline.

“I hate most how familiar this is, Quaker. We shall have to reinvent ourselves or our friends will find us too predictable.”

“Ashe.”

“Yes, darling.”

“I like Stafford.”

“No, you don’t.”

She smiled. “I do. He’s proud…and challenging…and willing to face you…to win her. I know it’s all a tangle but there is something about him. I trust him. And more…I think Scarlett loves him, Ashe. I think he is her duke. I think he was hers all along.”

“Caroline.” It was all he could manage to say.

“I. Like. Him.”

“Damn it, Caroline.”

“Language.” She smiled up at him, reaching up to touch his face. “If he asks her to marry him, and she accepts him, promise me you will be very sweet and very kind and pretend to be very excited for them both.”

He shook his head slowly but began to smile. “I do like the way you used the word ‘pretend’ just then…”

“I was giving you a way to preserve your pride.”

“Caroline, are you sure about this?”

“I cannot be more certain. He reminds me of you.”

“You win. You always win, my darling Quaker.”

“I know but I do love the way you make me fight for every victory so that I don’t take my victories for granted.”

“That was the plan all along.” He leaned over to kiss her then hesitated. “When you are better, Caroline, can we fight again?”

“Every day, Ashe. We will fight every day.”

“That’s my girl.” He kissed her as tenderly as a groom on a wedding day and for a few moments, time stood still.

A
she strode
out of the bedroom and signaled for Rowan to follow him to his study. He closed the door behind them, poured out two brandies and finally spoke. “Rowan. Tell me. The truth.”

“Her health has never been good.”

“It was the arsenic.” Ashe named the old agony head on. “When that bastard poisoned her by accident when he was trying to murder me all those years ago. It’s been a shadow over everything like a ghost.”

Rowan nodded slowly, trying to give Ashe time to take it all in. “It ravaged her internal organs. She healed, Ashe, but it’s always been a bit of a balance and a struggle. We nearly lost her when the twins were born but your wife is an amazing woman. I think she lives for you, Ashe.”

“Yes. For me,” Ashe said softly. “She lives for me.”

“To be honest, I thought you’d be a widower before the girls were five.” Rowan walked over to him to stand by the windows that looked out over the gardens of the house. “Gayle and I—we love her, too. Gayle is still determined that I am wrong but only because her heart is overruling her head.”

“Am I going to be a widower now?”

“It’s not stomach ulcers. I suspect it is cancer. The lack of appetite, the pain, the bleeding…it’s spread and there is no cure.”

Rowan waited for the explosion of temper, for the battle, the fury. Ashe was a warrior when it came to Caroline and had long had a paradoxical relationship with medicines and physicians. Ashe trusted Rowan completely and saw him as a dear friend, but he had also come to dread the sight of him crossing over his threshold.

Theirs was an uneasy alliance but it was a familiar one.

And now he’d given him the news that Ashe had dreaded most. He had spoken the words that Ashe refused to hear and that he could not fight his way past.

Here is the moment where he screams, tells me I’m a liar or incompetent and then probably punches me in the face. I should have brought Michael for protection—but God help me, I think I’m looking forward to the punishment. Anything so that I don’t feel like the world’s greatest villain destroying this man…

“Rowan?”

“Yes.”

“How long have you known?” Ashe asked the question without looking at him, his eyes locked on the view of green hedges and abundant flowers outside plunged into darkness.

“Not long. After Gayle diagnosed stomach ulcers, I took a second look at her notes. I hated what my instincts were telling me and I decided I’d insist on an exam after Fitzwalter’s. I didn’t want to spoil the Season and I knew everyone was very excited about—the prospects for the twins. I saw no need to ruin things. But then…things took a turn and there’s no doubt now.”

“No doubt now,” Ashe echoed again.

Rowan kept very still, willing to wait a century if his friend needed the time.

“Does she know?”

Rowan sighed. “I don’t think so. I haven’t told her. In my experience, it rarely benefits someone to hear the worst. Denial gives them—hope even where none can be found and hope is a powerful thing. It’s up to you, of course, if you wish to—”

“She knows.” Ashe leaned against the window’s wide casing, his voice was steady but hollowed. “She’s so smart, Rowan. She’s so incredibly clever and her instincts are uncanny. I tease her about reading minds but I swear, she’s that brilliant.”

Rowan wasn’t sure what to say. “Yes, she is.”

At last, Ashe turned to face him. “You’ll say
nothing
. You’ll do whatever you can to help her feel better and I am going to—love my wife. We have a wedding to plan for Starr and Scarlett’s may not be far behind. Caroline is looking forward to seeing them dressed in wedding finery and even to holding grandchildren in her arms.”

Rowan couldn’t find the heart to argue about the realities of time allotted and the course of the disease ahead, aware that his eyes probably said it all.

Ashe’s temper finally flared. “You underestimate her, Dr. West. It’s easy to do. But you forget that my petite and beautiful wife is an American and has no interest in doing what is expected of her. Everyone thinks it is Starr who is her perfect reflection because of their shared interests, overlooking Scarlett’s indomitable spirit and then mistakenly giving her father credit for it. They are both hers and a mirror held up to show the world who she is, Rowan.”

“Yes, I see that now.”

“I haven’t lost her yet!”

“No.”

The quiet came again, a dreadful pause that robbed Ashe of the fiery determination in his eyes. “I need you to go. I need to be alone now.”

“Yes.” Rowan stepped back and picked up his bag from where he’d set it behind one of the chairs. “Send for Gayle or myself if…anything occurs.”

Ashe said nothing, turning his back on his friend to look out the windows.

Rowan headed for the door and then looked back to see Ashe outlined by the moonlight, his coloring turned to molten silver and gold by the setting, his broad shoulders stiff and unyielding to the weight of the world. And then, they trembled and shook, as Ashe Blackwell began to break down, a rough cry escaping his lips in dry, merciless bursts that threatened to crumble him to the ground.

Rowan left quickly, closing the door behind him.

Death comes for all of us.

Even when you have a Lion guarding your door…