The Secret of Life Wellness: The Essential Guide to Life's Big Questions (7 page)

a little story book. Excitedly she ran to show her mother her picture book.

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Her mother not only brushed Susanne away but told her that her drawings

were not very good. As a seven year old, Susanne was devastated and

made a decision to stop her creative drawing and writing.

Not long after she began experiencing slight weakness in her knees.

Knees can often represent our flexibility and our ability to move forward in

life. When, at fifty-seven, Susanne finally made a decision to write children’s

books her knees deteriorated further. Susanne’s knees were storing the

memory of her childhood. When I inquired how she felt as a seven year old,

after her mother’s comment, she told me she felt useless, hopeless, and

worthless.

Although Susanne was following her dream of being a writer at fifty-

seven, the same feelings were resurfacing.

I asked Susanne to slightly adjust the memory she shared. I encouraged

her to imagine that a few minutes after the incident, her mother apologized

for brushing Susanne away, looked at her drawing carefully and told her

that she was really proud of her and she would love to see Susanne draw

many more pictures.

I also asked Susanne what color would help her to dissolve the painful

aspects of that memory. She said orange. Orange is a great color for clear-

ing traumatic memories out of the cells. Susanne imagined orange light

moving through her body and clearing any toxic energy that related to that

particular memory. Then I asked her to visualize colors which could help her

feel more confident and creative. She worked with blue, yellow, and purple.

At the end of the session, Susanne reported that her knee felt 80 per-

cent better. She walked out of my office with more confidence to move

forward.

While you cannot get rid of your cellular memories, you can make slight

adjustments to them, as your subconscious mind does not know the differ-

ence between what is real and what is imagined. It is important to be aware

that the newly adjusted memory needs to feel realistic to you.

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Discover Your Beauty

I love Christina Aguilera’s song “Beautiful.” There is so much truth in the lyrics, “You

are Beautiful no matter what they say.” Although we live in an age of celebrity and

beauty magazines, which try to dictate to us what is beautiful and attractive and what is

not, our real beauty shines from within. It is something that cannot be bought over the

counter or carved by a plastic surgeon. Most of us have seen people who, while we may

have looked right when they first enter a room, go on to light up the place and become

exquisitely attractive. We no longer see their outer appearance but are enthralled by

their internal radiance and light.

Part of loving yourself is seeing and cultivating your own beauty. Every time you

pass a mirror, instead of judging yourself, try to see something beautiful. It can be inter-

nal or external.

Ask the people who love and care about you, what is lovable and beautiful about

you. When they tell you, accept it.

Let Down Your Protective Barriers

Many people carry strong protective barriers around themselves and their hearts to

shield against hurt or disappointment. These barriers do not stop them from feeling dis-

tressed, but rather prevent them from opening their hearts and loving or being loved.

Self-imposed barriers impede you from using your intuition, taking chances,

trusting the unknown, making powerful soul connections, diving into love, evolving

spiritually, being of service, and feeling alive and joyful.

Pierre’s Story: Breaking through to Love

Pierre attended a six day workshop I was teaching in France. He was a tall,

lanky man in his early forties, who seemed disillusioned by life. He told me

that the only reason he came to the workshop was because he had heard

me on the radio and was touched by what I said.

Pierre said that if what I taught did not work, he would abandon his

search for meaning. He told me that he did not feel any emotion, see any

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images, or experience any connection to his body or to anyone else. In

other words, Pierre was completely frozen and cut off from the wisdom of

his body and soul. His skill was thinking and judging. When other people

talked about having visions of something beautiful or important, Pierre said

that he did not see anything. When I taught about feelings or connecting to

the body, he told me he felt nothing. Most of the time, he seemed fidgety

and frustrated.

After three days, Pierre came to me and told me that he’d had enough

and he did not think he would be coming back. I encouraged Pierre to

return the following day, saying that he should wait until we finished the

workshop to pronounce his judgment. I told him that often we can have

deep breakthroughs at times when we have lost all hope and expect them

least. Pierre looked unconvinced but showed up the next morning. Appar-

ently, he had forgotten something and decided he would come in the

morning to fetch it.

Knowing the situation and that this was a real opportunity to transform

Pierre’s life and inspire others, I invited everyone to focus on themselves

and ask a very important question: Who am I? I told the group, “If you are

not your arm or leg, because if those were cut off you would still be here,

and if you are not your thoughts or feelings or experiences, because they

change, then
who are you
?”

The room became quiet as people began their exploration. After a

while, I heard answers like, “I am love,” “I’m all there is,” “I am a soul,” “I am

life,” and so forth.

I decided to go a bit further and ask everyone to think of someone that

they had judged in the room and then look beyond their barriers and see

into that person’s heart and soul. Since Pierre was still resisting, I decided to

tune in to him. The first thing I saw was a wall that seemed impenetrable.

I intuitively asked to be shown what had created this wall. Immediately, I

saw a scene of a young boy who was alone and looking for his mother to

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give him love, care, and attention. I knew that I was accessing a cellular

memory from Pierre’s childhood.

I also understood why Pierre had built up a massive fortress.

When everyone had completed the exercise, I asked Pierre to sit in the

middle of the room. I looked directly into his eyes and said, “Who has hurt

you so much that you have had to build a massive fortress to keep every-

one out?” Pierre stared at me in shock, as if he had just been found out.

Before he spoke, I told him that I wanted to hear the answer from the child

part of him that had been hurt. After a few moments Pierre whispered,

“My Mum.”

As I had seen, when Pierre was a young boy, he desperately craved the

attention of his parents, especially his mother. When he did not receive it,

he felt lost, hurt, and abandoned. He made a decision that he had to be

strong and need nobody. Whenever he would get close to someone, the

fear of being abandoned would sweep through him, and Pierre would push

that person away. In order not to feel the hurt of abandonment, Pierre

numbed all his senses.

I asked one of my helpers to come into the middle of the room and to

role-play with Pierre. Pierre would speak from the part of the little boy, who

was holding onto the pain and my assistant would play the role of his

mother.

During the process, I saw Pierre laugh and cry until he felt more surren-

dered and at peace. I told him that this was his lucky day. I asked each

participant to tell him what was lovable about him. As each person came up

to Pierre his face would light up and transform. I could not believe how dif-

ferent he looked. His face seemed open, welcoming and soft. His whole

body was vibrating and he said that he felt like he was flying.

When this process was complete, each person in the room was touched

and somehow transformed. Something deep was healing. We had a short

break, and I asked everyone to sit for the next exercise, which is one of my

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favorites. It is when we work on sending healing to our own and our

partner’s heart. The process was deep and beautiful, and I saw Pierre’s face

shining. When I asked him about his experience, he proceeded to tell me in

detail all the things he saw and felt in his partner’s heart, which she con-

firmed were accurate and relevant to her life. He even confessed to receiving

very precise information about her past life, which she had been previously

aware of. It was an extraordinary change for someone who had told me that

he could not feel, see, or sense anything a few hours previously.

The next morning Pierre, one of the first to arrive at the workshop,

thanked me profusely and told me that the process we did the previous day

was the most beautiful experience of his life. He asked me to wait before

starting, as he had to go and pick up something special, and returned ten

minutes later with two huge bouquets of stunning flowers.

I was deeply touched. What it showed me above all else is that we all

need to experience love and connection. As children, we know that we are

lovable, based on how our parents and people who are close to us treat us.

We feel we are lovable until somehow we are told or shown that we are not.

To love ourselves, we need to be willing to know ourselves by giving

ourselves time, asking deep questions, and focusing on opening our hearts.

However, once our heart begins to open, we need to express this love to

others. As we express our love, it begins to grow and flow through our

whole being.

The Magic of Love

I am extremely fortunate to have taught thousands of people to connect to their bodies

and open their hearts. What I find extraordinary is when several people in a group

open their hearts at the same time. I feel like true magic happens in these moments. I

have witnessed the most incredible, miraculous physical healings in the space of love:

people who could hardly walk get up from their chairs and start dancing; diseases that

doctors said were incurable are healed; and people let go of past baggage and fall in love

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with themselves, their lives, and their families. I have seen the deepest bonds created

and the most fantastic opportunities open up. There have even been a few marriages.

As I write, I feel enormous gratitude for having truly experienced the energy of

love. Many people write or talk about love as a nice concept. But to really open your

heart, feel, touch, taste, breathe, and experience it outside the perimeters of a romantic

relationship is extraordinary. This does not have to take away from a relationship you

have with your partner but can actually enhance it.

The Healing Power of Touch

Many scientific experiments have proven that touch is healing to the human body. To

love ourselves and to feel love, we need to be touched. We need to be touched on a

physical, emotional, and soul level. It is so beautiful to see that more and more people

are embracing the idea that hugging each other is healing.

At times I ask people to embrace each other in some of my workshops. Often, I

play a song and encourage people to hug for the duration of the song. I want people to

make a real connection, to allow themselves to feel the power of touch and the strength

of connecting heart to heart for several minutes.

My Story: Experiencing Oneness

Not long after I met Frederic, we agreed to catch up for dinner. We had

such a powerful and pure heart connection that both of us were speechless

when we saw each other. We simply could not express with words the love

and gratitude we felt for having such an extraordinary and unexpected

connection.

I put on some music, and for a few minutes we just sat in silence, enjoy-