Take What You Want (34 page)

Alex
set his fork down on the table and concentrated on the layers of
sound swirling around him, opening up his musical receptors and
letting it all wash over him like the tide. He tipped his head back
over his shoulders, stretching the length of his throat;
feeling
each sound, more so than hearing it. It began to play like a
symphony for him, each unique sound blending to create a beautiful
soundtrack in his head. The other sound he couldn't recognize,
returned. It fluttered in around him, more definable this time.
Alex focused his energy, trying to
feel
it like the other sounds. It slowly spiraled around him, stroking
him with long soft caresses; elevating him, and coming into focus in
his minds eye.

Laughter.

Danni's delicate female
laughter was raining down around him and, in that one perfect moment,
she created the melody. Just like that, a song was laid out before
him, begging to be written.

Alex launched himself out of
the chair and ran down the hall to the space he was using as a music
room and where he kept his keyboard and guitars stored. He reached
for an acoustic guitar sitting in a stand, a small recording device,
and a pile of blank sheet music paper and a pencil, then hurried back
to the kitchen. He sat down in the same chair; backside facing the
open doors, and laid the guitar across his lap. He pressed the
record button on the tiny device, took several deep breaths, and
closed his eyes, slowly drifting back into the vibrations of the
outside sounds.

A heartbeat later, his
fingers began to move back and forth over the frets on the neck of
the guitar, mimicking the sounds he could hear floating in from the
outside. One note seeped into the next and after a few melodic
phrases, a delicate, ambling ballad, took shape.

He had no idea how long he'd
been playing or what time it was, when he finally took a break. He
hit the playback button on the recording device and listened
intently. A slow smile spread across his mouth. He loved what he
heard filtering from the tiny speaker. It was a perfect reflection
for what he was feeling in that moment.

“
Fucking
A,” he said, and began scribbling down the notes onto the sheet
music paper. Several more hours passed and he had the melody down on
paper and also saved on the recording device. He stood up from the
chair and staggered from fatigue. The first flickers of daybreak
were coming up over the dunes across the street and lighting the
front rooms of the house that faced the ocean. He had pulled an
all-nighter working; something that wasn't foreign to him, but lately
those all-nighters were from having too much sex with Chase. He
smiled at the memory and said a silent prayer they'd be able to make
more memories – perhaps with all three of them rolling around
between the sheets.

Alex walked into his bedroom
and paused in front of the large, double doors overlooking the pool
area and Chase's guest house. The lights were out in their cottage
now. He briefly wondered if Chase and Danni had fucked themselves
into a coma or if they were still going at it. Then, he swore at
himself for sounding like a jealous idiot. He sat down on the end of
the bed and flopped backward against the mattress with his arms
stretched over his head. It was jealousy he was feeling; he was
certain of it, because his lover was sleeping with the woman he was
engaged to marry.

What
the fuck are you doing?
Alex
asked himself.

His hands covered his face
and rubbed. If he had any sense, he'd move back to L.A. and let
Chase get on with his life – marry Danni, and make beautiful
babies that look just like them. That was the logical thing, so why
couldn't he find the balls do it?

Because
you love him and walking away now would mean leaving a piece of
yourself behind.
The
truth was a bitter bitch, Alex thought, and he didn't want to be
anyone's bitch. He rolled over onto his side into a fetal position
and drifted off to sleep.

-0-

Chase
was in the driveway unloading Danni's suitcase from the back of his
truck, when he hard the car service vehicle honking their horn down
by the gate. Chase hit the automatic gate-opener button on his key
chain and waited for the car to pull up beside him, then bent down to
look into the window of the driver.

“
What
can I do for you?” Chase asked the man.

“
I
have a pick-up at this address; heading to the airport,” the
driver said.

Chase looked at the main
house. “I'll go see if he's ready,” Chase said, and
began walking toward the gate leading into the pool area. The
double-wide kitchen doors were open, so he climbed the steps to the
deck and stepped inside. He noticed a half-eaten bowl of salad on
the kitchen table; a guitar laying beside it, along with several
sheets of handwritten music.

“
Alex!
You up?” Chase called from the kitchen. He heard no movement
in the house and began moving down the hall toward the master
bedroom. He stopped in the doorway and saw Alex sprawled across the
big bed on his stomach, barefoot, but otherwise fully dressed.

Chase walked to the edge of
the bed and stopped, gazing down at Alex's sleeping form on top of
the quilt. He touched Alex's ankle, then ran the palm of his hand up
Alex's calf, feeling the soft leg hairs beneath his palm, and the
familiar knot began to harden in his groin. His fingers were
traversing the warm skin on the backside of Alex's thigh and moving
up under the hem of his shorts, when the man finally began to stir
from slumber. A moment later, Alex rolled over onto his back.

“
Did
you call for a taxi?” Chase asked Alex.

Alex jolted upright onto his
elbows. “Oh, shit! What time is it?”

“
Almost
noon,” Chase said.

“
Fuck!
Yeah, I have a charter flight waiting for me at the airport,”
Alex said. He rolled off the bed and started walking toward the
master bathroom.

Chase
watched him move. Something felt 'off' about Alex's frame of mind.
He leaned against the door frame and watched Alex unzip his pants and
begin urinating into the toilet; his hand bracing himself on the
wall.

“
Did
you get drunk last night or something?” Chase asked.

Alex
glanced at Chase over his shoulder, finished pissing, then tucked
himself back into his shorts. “No, I worked all night.
Writing,” he said, zipping his shorts and moving to the sinks
in front of the mirror and ran the water to warm it. “I guess
I overslept.”

Chase watched him in silence
for a long moment. Something was definitely off with Alex. He
seemed mad, or at the very least, annoyed. He wondered if Alex's
mood had something to do with Danni's return.

“
Were
you going to say good-bye?” Chase asked.

Alex reached for a hand
towel and dried his face, then squirted toothpaste over the end of
his toothbrush and started the rhythmic strokes inside his mouth. He
spit and rinsed, then rolled on one hip against the counter and faced
Chase.

“
I
didn't intend to sleep this late, but yeah, I was going to say
good-bye,” Alex said.

“
You
seem pissed,” Chase said.

Alex walked past Chase and
went to his closet. He selected a clean shirt, pulled off the shirt
he had slept in, and slipped the new one over his shoulders to
button.

“
How
was the reunion with Danni?” Alex asked. Damn it! He hated
the tone of his own voice. It dripped of sarcasm and made him sound
like a scorned, little bitch.

“
Great,”
Chase said. “It's like she never left.”

“
Good,
I'm glad,” Alex said. He kept his back to Chase while he
attempted to button the shirt, his anger pitching with each button he
had to wrestle with to get it to slip through the hole in the fabric.
He gave up fighting with several buttons to go, and drew in a long
breath to try and calm himself before he started again, and then he
felt his heat; standing directly behind him. He could feel Chase's
enormous presence and warmth without having to look. A moment later,
Chase set his hands onto Alex's shoulders, the tips of the fingers
digging into the muscles.

“
Alex,
what's going on?”

Alex swallowed hard. He
needed to pull himself together. “I worked all night,”
he said, knowing he was repeating himself. “I'm still half
asleep.”

Chase spun Alex around and
forced him to look him in the eye. The moment those fluid green eyes
hit Chase, he knew. He could see the pain clouding Alex's gaze, feel
it in his body language, and he hated knowing he was likely the cause
of it. He tugged Alex against his chest and hugged him tightly; his
face dropping to Alex's neck. It took several heartbeats before Alex
finally wrapped his arms around Chase's back, making their embrace
complete.

“
I
don't know what to say, Alex,” Chase said quietly into the
collar of Alex's linen shirt. “I'm sorry about last night, but
you knew she was eventually coming home.”

“
I
know, Chase,” Alex said. “And, you've done nothing to
warrant an apology. If anyone should apologize right now it's me.
I'm acting like a jealous dick and I'm sorry.”

Alex pulled out of the
embrace and stepped away to collect the bag from the floor he had
packed the previous night. “I gotta get going,” Alex
said, as he walked from the room.

Chase called to Alex and
caught him in the hallway by the wrist. He jerked him back to him,
gripped his face with both hands, and planted a possessive kiss on
Alex's mouth. Minty toothpaste greeted his tongue, as it slipped
inside. Chase felt Alex moan and the bag he was holding slipped from
his hand. It hit Chase's foot before landing on the floor. Chase
pushed Alex up against the wall in the hallway and deepened the kiss;
both tongues probing and teasing the other.

“
I
can't let you leave angry,” Chase panted.

“
So,
you're gonna send me off with a boner instead?” Alex asked.

Chase
reached between them and squeezed Alex's erection through his shorts.
His fingers ran the long length of it and Alex slumped against the
wall; giving in to the wonderful sensations Chase always gave him.
Good as it felt, Alex couldn't stick around to enjoy it with a plane
waiting for him at the airport.

“
I
really need to get going before that car leaves,” Alex said,
trying to catch his breath.

“
I'm
happy to drive you,” Chase said, and bent in for another kiss.

Alex arched his throat and
Chase went for it, sucking the whiskered skin on the soft spot below
his chin. “We don't have time for this,” he said in a
strained voice.

Chase tipped his hips
forward to rub against Alex, then froze when he heard the female
voice calling to him from the kitchen.

“
Chase?
Are you in here?” Danni asked. “There's a car out in
the driveway.”

Both men shot up straight
and Chase stepped away from Alex. “Yeah, babe,” he said.
“I was helping Alex with his bag.”

“
More
like groping my bag,” Alex mumbled. He bent at the waist to
pick-up the backpack from the carpeted floor and followed Chase out
to the kitchen.

Danni
was waiting by the open French doors, wearing a short, black
sundress; exposing long, tanned legs and nothing on her feet. The
sight stopped Alex in his tracks; as he took the time to drink in the
sight of the shiny, dark hair framing her pretty face and the warmest
chocolate brown eyes he'd ever seen. And she was barefoot.

Oh,
the delicious things I could do to those pretty, painted toes. Fuck.
Me. Please.

Alex was a goner. He forced
his eyes back up to her flushed face and realized Danni seemed
nervous – nervous to meet him? He tossed his backpack onto the
kitchen table and walked to her.