Sam and Daphne were on the couch when I got home, Daphne asleep while Sam cradled her head in his lap. I wondered if that’s how Adam had spent his night, watching me sleep, since he didn’t need to. It was either incredibly comforting or slightly creepy to think of him sitting there all night long watching over me.
“Hi,” I whispered, leaning against the back of the couch.
“You look like the cat dragged you in,” he replied, almost getting the phrase right and I gave him a pallid smile.
“I’ve had better mornings,” I admitted when Daphne gave no sign of stirring at all. “I’m sorry you had to stay here all night, is Ben alright?”
“Yes, he has been up this morning and eaten, and has since retreated back into your bedroom.”
“And he seemed… alright to you?” I asked anxiously.
“He did seem changed, though I couldn’t say how exactly,” Sam considered aloud, his hand moving absently over Daphne’s hair. “I didn’t spend much time in his company though.”
I let out a long breath, swallowing past the wave of nausea. “Thanks for hanging out, I can take over if you want to get Daphne home.”
“I’d rather not disturb her yet if it’s all the same to you. She was up very late last night.” I could easily imagine them staying up talking for most of the night. “Are you feeling alright? You look pale, even for you.”
“I think I have the flu or something, I’ve felt crappy all morning. I’ve been meaning to ask you, do you ever get sick?”
“No, I do not. I’ve seen many diseases over the years though, the flu doesn’t look at all pleasant.”
“It’s not, but it’s one of those things you can’t escape like death and taxes.” He stared at me blankly, and I realized he’d never had to think about those things either. “I guess I’m not all that angelic then, even with the Grace. Ah well. I’ll go check on Ben and maybe I’ll feel better after a hot shower.”
“Would you like me to try and heal your ailment?” he offered, but I shook my head.
“No, I don’t want to disturb you guys, she looks tired. It’s not that bad, but I’ll keep that in mind if it ends up getting a whole lot worse.” Leaving them to their rest, I knocked gently on my bedroom door, stepping in when I heard Ben’s soft reply. “Hey, how are you feeling today? You look better.” And he did, much more refreshed. A shower and a good night’s sleep and he looked almost like the Ben I knew, except for the darkening of his aura that persisted. I’d forgotten to ask Sam about that.
“Thanks, I feel a lot better, things seem much clearer this morning.” I hoped that meant he wasn’t going to try and pursue a relationship with me anymore. “I have to say, I hoped you’d come back last night though.”
No such luck…
“I had to deal with my mother, get her settled in. Are you really feeling alright?” The past few months in Midian had to have been hard on him physically, I had no idea if they’d been feeding him regularly, though he didn’t seem gaunt.
“I’m fine,” he waved away my concern. “I even found a change of my clothes in the back of your closet.”
“I thought it might be a good idea to hang onto them for when you got home.”
“That was very thoughtful, thank you.” He stepped closer and I took a step back, maintaining that cushion of space between us.
“Listen. I thought we should talk about what you’re going to say to the cops. The sooner we get our stories straight, the sooner you can get back to your regular life.”
“Oh, I don’t know, there are certain perks to being a kept man,” he grinned. “What did you tell them already about my disappearance?”
“Very little. I said I hadn’t seen you since that night, which was technically true.”
“Smart. People get tripped up when they complicate their lies with a lot of unnecessary details. It’s best to keep things simple.”
“I’m glad you approve. What do you think we should tell them?”
“I take it I shouldn’t go with the truth then? Adam kidnapped me and kept me hostage?” he raised a single brow.
“I’d take it as a personal favor if you didn’t. I’d prefer to keep Adam’s name out of it entirely if possible.”
“I’m open to suggestions.” He sat back on the edge of my bed. Put on the spot, I wasn’t sure what to go with. Keep it simple sounded easy in theory, but how did one explain disappearing for weeks?
“Kidnapping is out, or they’ll keep investigating what happened to you. What about amnesia? You bumped your head and forgot who you were?”
“Sounds a little movie-of-the-week don’t you think?”
“Well, I don’t think they’d buy alien abduction, so that leaves you going somewhere on purpose. Maybe you had a family emergency?”
“No good, they would have checked with my family when I didn’t turn up.”
“Right, I forgot about that.” I chewed on the inside of my lip. “I’ve got nothing then, do you have any ideas?”
“I could say I lost it when we broke up, which is true, in a way.”
“Okay,” I nodded, not sure where he was going with it. “And?”
“And… I went on a bender, fell off the wagon, and spent the last few weeks curled up in a dive somewhere, living in the bottom of a bottle.”
My mouth dropped open. “Won’t you get in trouble for walking off the job like that?”
“Some. I’ll probably be suspended, and have to go to counseling at the very least, but I’ve put in a lot of years with the department, I don’t think they’d fire me over it.”
“That sounds kind of risky, are you sure you want to admit to something like that?”
“I’d do it for you in a heartbeat.” He gave me a lopsided smile and it made me frown all the more.
“Ben, please don’t throw away your career for me. I don’t want you making that sacrifice trying to impress me.”
“It would be pretty impressive though, wouldn’t it?”
I tried not to smile at the look on his face. “That isn’t the point. I meant what I said last night. I’m in love with Adam. I don’t want you thinking you can change my mind about that and end up losing your job in the bargain.”
“I meant what I said too, I’m not giving up so easily. Besides, I think it’s a good story. A lot less dramatic than saying I was kidnapped at gunpoint.”
“You’ve never had a drinking problem before though, would they even believe you’d do something like that?”
“People are always eager to believe the worst in others,” he shrugged. “All it would take is a little bit of soul searching with the department shrink and I’d be off the hook.”
“I don’t know, I still don’t feel good about this. What if you told them you got robbed while you were out drinking? Just one night of drinking, not a bender that lasted for weeks, and you got koshed on the head and ended up in the hospital in another town or something?”
“It doesn’t explain why I didn’t call anyone to come and get me. No, I think you should let me take the heat on this one. I can handle it, Mercy.”
“I don’t know, Ben…”
“I do,” he reached for my hands. “Let me do this for you, I want to.”
I knew it was a bad idea. Knew it down to my bones, but what else could I do? “Alright.” Pulling my hands out of his, I went to my dresser to pull out fresh clothes. “But this doesn’t change things between us. I’m with Adam.”
“For now.”
Closing my eyes, I counted to ten, and when I opened them again, Ben stood beside me, looking at the pink plastic jewelry box on top of my dresser.
“Is that where Azazael is?”
“Yep, it’s cute, isn’t it? I should probably bedazzle it with some pretty gems or feathers or something,” I smiled, inordinately pleased by the thought of Azazael trapped inside there, impotent, and hopefully able to hear life going on around him with nothing he could do about it.
“Actually, he might like that, the guy was pretty vain,” Ben snorted, and I remembered he probably knew him better than any of us did.
“In that case, maybe I’ll stick him away in the closet and forget about him. That’s what he deserves most.” Picking up the box, I did just that, sticking it on the shelf above my closet, above a box of old postcards and mementos I kept.
“Hey, I was thinking,” Ben caught my attention again. “Christmas is coming, you don’t even have a tree up yet. How about we go pick one out?”
Christmas was the last thing on my mind, though I had done most of my shopping back in November before things had gotten too crazy. With my mother in town, it sounded more like a pain than the joyful celebration I usually looked forward to. “We can’t go out and about, not until you talk to the police and let it be known you’re back in town. How would it look if you’re spotted in town Christmas tree shopping with me before you tell your family or work you’re back?”
“Alright, let’s go get that over and done with then. We can stop by the precinct, then get some lunch and go look at trees.”
“We?” Somehow I hadn’t thought I’d be present when he went in.
“Sure, why not?”
“Well, for one thing, Detective Santiago hates me with a fiery passion. She’s absolutely convinced I had something to do with your disappearance.”
“Anna? That’s because she’s a good cop. I hate to break it to you, but you did, in fact, have something to do with my disappearance.”
“I know, but she thinks I murdered you with Sam because you were after him for killing Weatie.”
“That’s a new one,” Ben frowned. “Why would she think that?”
“She saw some notes in your files that said he was your main suspect. Is that true? Do you think he killed Weatie?”
“Did he?”
Not really the conversation I wanted to get into. “I’ll come with you for moral support, but I’m staying out of it. You can do all the talking. Then, if you’re feeling up for it, we can take you home. Wouldn’t you like to sleep in your own bed tonight?”
“I’d rather sleep in yours,” he smiled wolfishly.
“It’ll be a little crowded there with Adam in it.”
“I can share if he can.”
“Eewh, no thanks. I’m gonna go take a shower, then I’ll take you down to the precinct.”
“Want some company?” his brows raised hopefully.
“Not yours,” I smiled over my shoulder before I disappeared into the bathroom, firmly locking the door behind me.
* * *
It was a different experience walking into the police precinct with Ben on my arm. Instead of suspicious stares, we got widespread grins and welcoming smiles at seeing him back again. All except for Detective Santiago who still looked like she wanted to spit nails at me. Pretty quickly we were ushered into an interview room, and Ben insisted I stay when she tried to close the door in my face.
While I sat there uncomfortably, Ben went through the story of how he’d lost it when I broke things off with him, and completely cut himself off from everyone, until he’d realized he didn’t stand a chance at getting me back unless he came back. I could see the skepticism on her face at that, and who could blame her, it sounded farfetched to me too.
“And are you together now?” she asked, eyes narrowing at me, but it was Ben who replied.
“Not yet.”
“No, I’m still with Adam,” I interjected. “But that doesn’t mean we can’t be friends.” I patted Ben’s hand lightly.
“Adam,” Santiago repeated. “I’m still not clear what happened with Parker.”
Ben’s forehead crumpled in confusion. “Wait, when were you with Parker?”
“That’s who you dumped him for, didn’t you?” she pressed, and I felt the walls closing in on me.
“Are you sleeping with Sam too?” Ben demanded, and I saw the gleam of satisfaction in Santiago’s eyes at the accusation.
“You know that’s not happening, he’s with Daphne.”
“Christ, then who all haven’t you slept with? First you’re screwing Adam and now Parker…”
Taking a deep breath, I tried to put some order to the lies. “I had feelings for Adam at the time, but he wasn’t around much, he travels a lot for work. Things between Parker and I… heated up, and I decided I couldn’t count on Adam and I didn’t want to keep Ben hoping for more than I could give, so I broke it off with him.”
“After you were already fucking both of them behind my back,” Ben glowered, and I decided that it wasn’t the right time to get into the details of when I had or hadn’t slept with Adam or Parker.
“Parker and I… it wasn’t built to last either. You know how it is when you get involved with someone you work with. It’s hot for a while, but it burns itself out pretty quickly.”
“And what does Mr. Anderson do for a living?”
“I honestly don’t know, he won’t discuss it with me,” I answered truthfully.
“That doesn’t strike you as odd?”
“That’s not the only odd thing about him,” Ben snorted, and I shot him a look.
“He tells me not to worry about it, and I find I’ve had more than enough to deal with without nosing too deep into his affairs. But to get back to your questionl, yes, I broke things off with Ben to be with Parker. Then when Adam came back, I couldn’t deny that he’s the one I want to be with.” I knew it didn’t paint me in a very flattering picture, but it wasn’t as bad as what Ben had copped to on my behalf.
“And you are now ready to step back into your life again?” she turned to Ben.
“I’m ready to take my lumps. I assume the Captain will want to meet with me about this.”
“At the very least,” she nodded. “I’ll put my report on his desk this afternoon. I expect you’ll hear from him sometime this week. He’ll want to meet with you alone of course,” she leveled an unfriendly stare in my direction.
“Mercy, why don’t you wait for me outside? I’ll finish up here with Detective Santiago and be out in a few minutes.”
Eager to get out of that room, I launched myself to my feet. “You got it. I’ll be waiting in the car.” I couldn’t get out of that precinct fast enough, the smell in there making my still sensitive stomach turn a little.
Once in the relative comfort of my car, I called Adam, needing to hear his voice.
“What are you wearing?” was the first thing out of his mouth, in a sexy, bedroom voice.
“I’d like to say nothing but a smile, but that would be awkward considering I’m in the parking lot at Ben’s precinct.”
“Everything okay?”
“Yeah, we met with Detective Santiago. Ben’s still in there talking to her now, but we should be wrapped up soon. I was thinking we should talk…”