Lost Princess (7 page)

Devlin said to me, “Are you afraid of my brother?”

Callista said, “Of course she is. Who wouldn’t be?“Devlin gave her an annoyed look, and Callista seemed to melt in front of it. “I’m sorry, my lord. I am overwrought.”

“Katrina,” he said, emphasizing that he was speaking to me and not Callista. “Do you fear he will hurt you more than you can bear?”

I considered his question. I thought of how Max hadn’t hurt me at all so far, save for the deflowering. He’d been kindly, overall, and had seemed almost to try to provoke me into anger today. Perhaps he was really upset by my question of my own worth. In any case, I just didn’t believe he’d truly harm me permanently. “No,” I said, looking at him straightly.

Devlin turned to Callista. “Callista, please allow me to speak privately with your cousin for a moment. I promise to return her to you soon.”

Callista, looking mystified, nodded and took herself some distance away where she wouldn’t hear what transpired between us.

Devlin said, “Katrina, my brother is what life has made him, as I suppose we all are. As you truly do not believe he will hurt you excessively, I will not interfere. But if you are amenable, I will give you some advice.”

I said, “Please do, lord Devlin. I will listen and take your words to heart.”

He thought a moment. “You speak of hearts. Maximus has a heart, believe it or not, but it is buried so very deeply under all the armor he has built around it that many doubt its existence. His first wife was the result of an arranged marriage, and she was gentle and mild. Max tried to be a good husband to her, but he frequently scared her to the point that she became sickly and weak. It didn’t take much for the birth of his first child to take them both.

“Max was deeply saddened that he had not been able to keep his wife alive and happy, and tried to choose better the next time around.  His second wife was from an excellent family and seemed the model woman. She pleased him from the start, and he would hear no word against her. Unfortunately she was not as she seemed and had the heart of an unfaithful snake. She cheated on him more than once, and the baby that took her with it during an early birth might or might not have been Max’s.

“Now he has you. I look at you and think perhaps this time Max has truly chosen well. But his past mistakes bedevil him, and he fears you will either play him false and defy his authority, or that he will frighten you beyond your ability to bear.” Devlin gave me an encouraging smile. “My advice is to let him work out his demons, even if that means enduring his often angry decisions. Be strong and show him that you will not fade away in fear, but neither will you make him look weak.” Devlin sighed. “I know what I ask is not easy, but you are the only one who can help him recover from what his first two wives have done to him.”

I smiled at Devlin with real gratitude. “Thank you, my lord. I will do my best.”

He reached out and took my hand in his strong one. I’d noticed he was leery of touching anyone with his weaker left hand, as if he feared they would be offended or sickened. It seemed ridiculous to me, but what did I know of how it felt to be a cripple? “Katrina, you are as my sister now, please call me Devlin.” He favored me with another long look. “What I am about to ask is completely none of my business, and I shall not be offended if you tell me so, but I wonder—thus far, has Max pleased you?”

I felt my face heat in an unwanted blush. “Yes, he has,” I admitted.

Devlin laughed. “I’m glad to hear it. Now, let me return you to your cousin before she worries herself into an illness. You are lucky to have such a caring relative.”

We stopped in front of Callista who looked at me curiously as I said, “Your brother is lucky in that way as well, my lo—Devlin.”

When Devlin was out of sight, Callista tugged on my arm. “What did you two talk about?”

“He told me about Max’s two previous wives. Do not ask me to say more or I’ll no doubt anger Max even more for spreading tales.”

“I don’t want that,” Callista said, as I knew she would. “Lord Devlin is kind, isn’t he?”

“Yes,” I said, thinking she was stating the obvious. “And?”

“And…I like him,” she admitted.

“As do I. As a matter of fact, I bet most of the people here like Devlin.” Again, she simply seemed to be stating what I already knew. 

She looked at me, exasperated. “Katrina, don’t be dense. I am to be married off soon. I’m eighteen in mere days.”

“Oh!” I said, finally understanding. “You fancy Devlin? But…he wants no wife.”

Callista gave me a calm look. “Well, perhaps he simply hasn’t found the wife he does want. I like him, and wish…well, I wish he looked at me as I’ve seen the Regent look at you.”

“How does Max look at me?” I asked.

“Like he’s starving and you’re food,” Callista said, grinning. “Now, since he wants you to move your things, let’s go do that. And on the way you can tell me how you put such a look on his face. I’m going to be married soon myself, you know. I need to hear what it’s like. Exactly. In detail.“I was blushing like mad as she led me off towards our room. I doubted I’d get away this time.

Chapter Six

Max found me just before I entered the large hall for dinner. “Katrina, you will await me here each evening so that we might enter together.” He looked after Callista, who had made herself scarce as Max had approached. “Your cousin may dine with us or elsewhere as she wishes.” I nodded to show I understood.

During dinner I found myself watching Max, thinking about what Devlin had said. One wife too weak for him, and he’d essentially frightened the woman to death. Another wife who betrayed his trust. No wonder he was angry so often. And no wonder he thought little of women. I wondered if he truly had baited me this afternoon in order to bring my anger out. He must worry about being too frightening for me. Perhaps he had tried to rile me. But then how would he know that the subject of women as lesser beings would be my undoing? I was probably making more of his motives than were truly there.

He seemed oblivious of me, but I realized suddenly that he held himself so I was usually visible, at least out of the corner of his eye. It could be from lack of trust—did he fear I’d attack? The very idea made me smile to myself. Or perhaps he was as aware of me as I was of him. After Devlin’s explanation of his two previous wives, I was seeing Max as more of a person and less as a thing to be feared. This was odd since he had sworn to punish me scant hours from now.

Dinner ended and Callista and I spoke to the cook about future meals. I let Callista do all the talking, barely paying attention. Max would punish me tonight, but I also bet he’d bed me as well, and to my surprise I was really looking forward to that part. Just thinking about what he might do, and what I could possibly do to him was making my heart beat faster and my palms sweat.

I started when a servant told me that the Regent was looking for me. I stood as if in a dream and followed the servant, barely noticing Callista’s worried look. I’d assured her earlier that I wasn’t afraid of excessive punishment, but now I was thinking that I’d never really been punished before. When Max had threatened to punish me on our wedding night, I’d been too frightened of the entire situation to even give much thought to the punishment Now, however, I was nervous, which seemed to act upon the wicked lust I felt until they were all mixed as one.

I was led to stand in front of Max, who looked around when the servant approached then quickly left. What would it be like to be so feared? I would hate it, but perhaps it wasn’t that different from being thought odd and unmarriageable. Max looked at me. “Come along wife,” he said sternly, and I followed him without a word, my nervousness increasing with each step I took leading me to his rooms.

He ushered me inside and shut and barred the door like usual. The hearth was lit to chase away the cold, and candles flickered throughout the room. Max turned and looked at me, his face hidden in shadow. “I hear you spoke with my brother today,” he said as he slowly approached me.

“Yes,” I said.

“Devlin believes the best of everyone, but most especially of me. What did he tell you?” Max asked. 

I wondered if telling Max would cause him to turn his anger on his brother. Max didn’t give me much time before he took my arm. “You are to answer me when I speak to you,” he said slowly. He pulled me over to the bed.

“I—I simply do not wish to cause any trouble between you and your brother,” I said, my heart thudding in my chest.

“Perhaps that’s true, then again, I would ask you, is that your decision to make?” He pulled me to sit next to him on the bed, our feet over the side.

I didn’t know what to say yet didn’t dare stay quiet. “I – I don’t know, my lord.”

“Did you ask him to save you from the punishment I’d promised you?” he asked.

“I—” I cleared my throat. “Callista was worried about me, but I—”

Max finished for me, “Told my brother you believed I wouldn’t hurt you beyond reason?”

I let my mouth drop open in surprise. “Yes. Devlin told you?”

Max didn’t answer that but only asked another question. “Do you truly believe that, or was it a pretty lie for my brother?”

My chin rose a notch as I said, “I did not lie, my lord.”

He looked like he might have been about to smile. “Katrina, you did challenge me, and for that you are to be thus rewarded. Yet, I’m not just going to punish you because of that. I’m also doing it because…I want to.”

My heart pounded; my throat dried up. I wasn’t sure what I was feeling, but my body was certainly preparing for something. “You want to?” I said, my voice slightly hoarse.

“I do,” he said. “And you’re right when you believe you won’t be marked or severely hurt.”

“Oh,” I said faintly.Max took my arm and with some pressure on my back, turned me so I was lying face down across his lap. I wondered if he could feel my heart racing. I should have been relieved that he intended to use just his hand and not a strap or stick, but all I could do was wait breathlessly for what he would do next.

“You are a woman with some spirit, Katrina. I don’t want you to lose that spirit.”

“You don’t?” I asked stupidly, not able to think while waiting for the first strike.

“No.” He drew my skirt slowly up my legs until he had bared my behind to his eyes. I had not replaced my underwear, although some devilish part of me had been tempted to do so. I jumped as he touched my bare behind, rubbing over it in a gentle circle. I thought I might just scream if he dragged this on much longer.

As if he had read my mind, his hand suddenly came down on my butt with a startlingly sharp crack. “Oh!” I gasped as the sting spread from the point of impact. I had barely had a chance to anticipate the next when he struck me again, this time on the other side. I squeaked this time and couldn’t help tightening up.

He stopped then, rubbing the stinging spots. His hand felt rough, and irritated the sore area. I was just starting to relax, thinking he might just have decided not to continue when he hit me again, four times, quickly, one after the other. By the fourth blow I was crying silently. I had given a gasp and a moan with each spank, but at the same time I was feeling strangely alive.  He paused briefly, then began again, this time not stopping until I broke down and tried to escape, attempting to cover my behind with my hands, twisting on his lap.

He paused again as he collected my wrists in his and held them behind my back with one large hand. The pressure from my own arms as well as his hold on me prevented me from squirming away. I was panting now, not scared, really, but with every sense attuned to what Max was doing. He held me still until I quit trying to escape and went limp, tears dripping on the bed. “Katrina,” he said in a strangely peaceful voice. “Can you stay still now? I want you to try for me.”

I would have sworn that if someone was hitting me, and then asked me to do something for him, I would either laugh or curse him, but I did neither. I swallowed and nodded. “I will try,” I said faintly, a serene undercurrent of inevitability swirling around me.

Max leaned over and kissed my tousled hair. I closed my eyes and held my own wrists in front of me, determined not to break again. But Max didn’t hit me again, at least not right away. Instead he let his hand wander about my wounded posterior, making me moan a little when his calluses scraped against my sore bottom. He moved me slightly, so he had more room and slid his hands down to where he had touched me this morning, giving me the greatest pleasure of my life. Now he barely touched me, and I shuddered, the feeling was so intense. He slid two fingers into me, entering me easily since somehow I’d become as slippery as I’d ever been.

Max removed his hand, and I waited, holding my breath until I saw stars in front of my eyes. I let my breath out and he struck. I couldn’t help it—I shrieked at the pain, again and again each time he hit me. But I didn’t fight him, and I didn’t let my hands go from where they were clasped together in front of me. I felt a total and utter surrender that was peaceful and exciting at the same time. Then he was turning me over in his lap, and his mouth was on mine. I squirmed a little from the pain still radiating through my abused behind, but more than that I kissed him back, trying to press myself closer to him as my body swung from the pain to pleasure and back again in a dizzying turmoil.

I wasn’t the only one who seemed almost crazed with desire. Max tore at my dress, pulling it off as I tried to help, then his own clothes were tossed away as quickly as he could get them off. He came down on me on the bed and pressed into me where he worked himself in, finding easier passage than he’d had before. He thrust into me hard from the start, and I almost immediately screamed with the pleasure shooting through me. I hardly came down but was propelled up again, and as I’d done before, I dug my nails into his back trying to find some solidity as my world seemed to fly apart. I barely noticed as Max finished and lay half on and half off me, breathing heavily. I felt like I might be damaged in some way and might never move again. My limbs seemed to be filled with something heavy and slow, and I could barely turn my head to look at Max as he rolled to his side, taking me with him, so we were face to face.