Authors: Victoria Sinclair
‘Aren’t we going to eat first?’ asked Nicholas, raising an eyebrow.
‘Well, there’s a bit I’d like to cover. If that’s not a problem?’
‘No…no problem at all. Fire away.’ For the next few minutes until their food arrived, Emily asked questions, taking notes as she tried to interpret Nicholas’s answers.
‘You know,’ he finally said, ‘you really need to develop a bit more confidence in your abilities, Emily. You understand the material very well, I think, you just don’t believe in yourself enough.’ She shrugged lightly, hoping he didn’t think she was just asking him these questions to spend more time with him.
‘I guess I just like to be sure,’ she responded. She’d been out of formal education for so long that she did doubt herself. She was confident in many ways, but in this she felt she was a long way behind the eight ball, and she wanted to do all she could to catch up.
By the time their meal arrived, Emily was famished, so she dug into her sandwiches with relish.
‘I’m glad to see you’ve got a good appetite,’ Nicholas commented. Emily looked at him, frowning.
‘You look as though you’ve lost weight. I’m glad to see you’re not on some stupid diet.’ She felt her cheeks flush slightly, remembering exactly how much of her body Nicholas had been privy to.
‘I’ve been unwell and didn’t have much appetite. I’ve never had to worry about my weight.’ She looked down at her food, refusing to meet his gaze, which she could feel trained on her. After awhile he nodded, and returned to his own lunch. For a moment they were lost in awkward silence, each wanting so much to say things to the other that they could not.
Emily finished her sandwich and pushed her empty plate away. ‘I suppose it’s time I got back to work.’ Nicholas nodded reluctantly, paid the bill, and they left in silence.
Emily arrived home to discover that she’d left her notes from lunch at work. ‘Damn!’ she swore out loud, anxious to go over them and write them up in the book she kept for class.
She did that week’s reading from the text, which was as dry and boring as always, then sat down to watch TV for an hour or so. Five minutes into the show, the doorbell rang. She almost jumped out of her seat. It was well after nine and she couldn’t remember the last time anyone had popped around so late without calling. A little paranoid, she kept the door chain secured as she opened it a crack, to see Nicholas’s handsome and always welcome face staring back at her.
‘What are you doing here?’ she asked, surprised.
‘I hope I’m not interrupting anything,’ he said.
‘No. But you didn’t answer my question. I thought after yesterday…’
‘After you invite me in, I’ll explain,’ he said wryly. Flushing, Emily remembered her manners and stepped away from the door.
‘Of course. Can I get you a drink?’
‘I’d love a cup of coffee. A friendly cup of coffee, that is.’ He grinned, and she remembered the first time she’d invited him in for coffee. ‘But this time, how about I make it? I don’t want to have to soothe any more burns.’ Emily laughed, still slightly embarrassed by the event.
‘Be my guest.’ He walked into the kitchen and she followed behind him. ‘And…?’
‘And what? Oh, of course. Your notes. When I was leaving Mark’s office after our meeting I saw them sitting on your desk, and knowing you’d already left for home I grabbed them for you.’ Emily shook her head in bemusement.
‘I can’t believe I left them at work! It’s lucky you saw them. What an idiot I am!’
‘Ahh, but such a lovely idiot. Relax Emily you’ve got a lot on your mind, that’s all. Now, sit, calm down, and leave the coffee to me. You have it white with two, right?’
‘How did you remember?’
‘I have an excellent memory, didn’t you know? Especially for things as important as how Emily Peterson takes her coffee. Now, shoo!’ She stuck her tongue out at him and sat down at the table, watching him as he worked. Why had he come here tonight? she wondered again. He could have dropped her notes off at work, or waited until their next lecture. He hadn’t had to drop around at her house in the evening to do so.
Veronica and Steven emerged from their bedrooms at the sound of voices.
‘Hi guys,’ Emily said. ‘This is Nicholas Cavanaugh,’ she introduced, ‘one of my university lecturers.’ She glared at each in turn, willing them not to say anything incriminating to Nicholas. Fortunately they understood and greeted him politely. ‘Either of you want a drink?’
‘Yeah, I’ll have a coffee,’ said Steven.
‘Me too!’ piped up Veronica. Emily looked sternly at the two of them.
‘Uh uh,’ she said, shaking her head. ‘How about a Milo?’
‘It was worth a shot,’ Steven replied with a grin. ‘I’ll have Milo since it’s the only thing on offer.’
‘OK, me too,’ Veronica agreed.
‘You’d better give me instructions,’ Nicholas said, grinning at the pair of them.
‘I like it strong and sweet. Three spoons of Milo and two of sugar,’ Veronica said. Emily raised her eyebrows and Veronica shrugged.
‘Let’s make that two of Milo and one sugar. And same goes for Steve,’ Emily said, giving her brother a warning look.
Veronica didn’t seem the slightest bit perturbed by Nicholas’s presence, but Emily could tell her brother’s mind was ticking over at a mile a minute, and she knew she’d be getting the third degree from him in the not too distant future. Emily had avoided telling them anything about her burgeoning relationship with Nicholas, and wondered whether she should have done so, but she thrust the thought away. She’d tell her siblings as soon as there was something definite, and right now, there was not.
Nicholas arrived at the table with a tray of drinks and a plate of oatmeal biscuits. Emily raised her eyebrows in surprise. She’d never have expected him to be so housetrained.
‘I found them in the biscuit tin,’ he said, indicating the biscuits with a grin.
‘Well done,’ she complimented him. ‘A perfect combination, coffee and biscuits, and,’ she added, taking a sip of the drink, ‘the coffee is superb.’
Nicholas chatted with Veronica and Steven for awhile about their interests and ambitions. It impressed her the way he got along with them so well, and was making an effort to include them in the conversation. It showed a side of him that she definitely approved of. Nicholas knew that she had a younger brother and sister in her care, of course, but she hadn’t been certain how he’d respond to them. Whatever happened in her life, Veronica and Steven had to come first, and she’d been half afraid that Nicholas wouldn’t be at all interested in them.
Veronica and Steven finished their drinks, and Emily hinted that it was time they were in bed. Veronica groaned and gave her a pleading look, but Steven nudged his sister, and with a frown she got up to leave.
‘So what was this visit really about?’ Emily finally had the chance to ask.
‘I should have known I couldn’t fool you,’ Nicholas said ruefully. He shook his head slightly. ‘But to be honest, I don’t really know. Let’s just say that the opportunity arose and I took it without a second thought. Again, I’m probably way out of line. It seems I’m really not learning from my mistakes where you’re concerned.’ Emily laughed softly.
‘Whatever the reason, I’m glad you came.’
‘Sooo, how’s work going?’ That wasn’t exactly the conversation starter Emily had expected, and she laughed. ‘OK I could probably do better, but that’s a starting point.’
‘Work’s work. It’s fine, as usual. University work is hard, but I think I’ve made the right choice.’ Nicholas gave her a hard look.
‘You’ll do well. You’ve got that thing about you. Determination. Persistence. You’re not afraid to ask for help, even though you might feel stupid when you do. You just need to develop a bit more confidence in yourself and you’ll be fine.’ She nodded.
Their conversation turned to Nicholas’s business, and the decision to teach at the local university.
‘Most lecturers have studied at university to get their degrees, generally gone on to higher education, and have fallen into academia without getting real world experience. I felt I had something to offer that they don’t have,’ he said thoughtfully. ‘And,’ he continued, ‘I guess I wanted to try my hand at something different. Another challenge, if you will.’ Although he tried to hide it, Emily realised there was a caring side to Nicholas he rarely allowed to be exposed. Occasionally it would come through in the little things he did: the way he was willing to help her, the way he treated Veronica and Steven with respect and genuine interest. Other times, he seemed cold and hard, but Emily was beginning to suspect that wasn’t the real Nicholas, but the persona he’d taken on in his attempt to take on the business world. And it had obviously worked.
‘I guess this is good night?’ Emily said softly, as Nicholas put down his empty mug and pushed back his chair to stand.
‘Yes…yes it is.’ But as Emily stood up to join him, he grabbed her arm, shaking his head roughly. ‘No,’ he said hoarsely, and pulled her against him. For a moment she thought to protest, thinking that each time she kissed him, each time she made love to him, it was harder to let him go, but the protests died in her throat as his tongue probed between her lips and she opened her mouth to accommodate him.
It wasn’t possible to break away from the hold he had on her. All her willpower fled out the window, and she was left gasping for breath, tingling all over her body, moist with anticipation of his deepest touch.
‘We shouldn’t…’ he muttered.
‘No, but we are.’ There was never any way back from the abyss of passion he pulled her into, until she’d been filled completely. And this time would be no exception.
They were quiet as they entered the bedroom, Emily fervently glad that her brother’s and sister’s rooms were at the other end of the house.
The first time Nicholas took her, it was fast, furious, filled with every ounce of passion and desire they shared for each other. But the next time was slow, languid and loving as they explored every nook and cranny of each other’s bodies, kissing and touching each delicious part with infinite care and love.
Hours seemed to pass in minutes, and the night was almost over when Nicholas sighed deeply and told her it was time for him to leave. Although she wanted to wake up next to him, now was not the time. He had to leave before Veronica and Steven were up. In the morning she’d need all her faculties intact. If Nicholas were beside her in bed, that would be next to impossible.
‘I know it’s spur of the moment, Emily, but I’ve got an extra ticket and it’s a great opportunity for you.’ Mark’s eyes twinkled and his tone was annoyingly persuasive. Emily frowned slightly.
‘I don’t know if it is such a good idea, Mark,’ she replied, but she knew she’d relent.
The idea of attending a business conference on the Gold Coast seemed like a great opportunity for her. Mark had planned on taking Lisa, but her doctor had advised her against flying, and it was too far to drive for a single weekend away. But it’d do Emily good to get away for a couple of days, and she knew it. Perhaps being on the Gold Coast would get her mind off Nicholas, who she really didn’t need to think about right now. As long as her good friend and neighbour Evelyn would be able to babysit the kids, they’d be good to go.
Three days later Emily was on the plane, flying high both literally and emotionally.
‘So, what should I expect?’ she asked Mark in an off-hand manner. Part of her excitement was tinged by the fear that she would find herself out of her league.
‘Expect a bunch of people who are all interested in out-performing and outclassing each other,’ Mark replied with a slightly sardonic laugh. Emily raised her eyebrows. ‘OK, it’s not that bad. Business is business though. A lot of contacts will be made – you know, I’ll rub your back you rub mine; there will be interesting – and some not-so-interesting-talks from a bunch of successful people; and there will be excellent food and wine.’
‘I see,’ replied Emily, who didn’t quite. But she didn’t regret coming.
Events had been planned for the entire weekend, beginning Friday evening where there would be a welcome dinner for the attendees. Their flight arrived well before they had to be there, giving them time to shower and change before leaving for the convention centre.
Mark had booked them into the
Excelsior
, a move that surprised Emily. It was a five star hotel, and she hated to think what one room would cost for two nights, let alone two!
‘Come now, Mark, admit it,’ Emily said as they entered the marble tiled foyer, ‘you’re just as competitive as any of the rest of those business people you told me about! Imagine checking us in here! It must have cost a small fortune.’ Mark grinned sheepishly.
‘OK, you’ve caught me. It always pays to look prosperous.’
‘I wish I could contribute something towards the cost of my room. I assume you only had one booked for Lisa and yourself?’
‘That’s true, I did. But I don’t expect you to pay a cent, Emily. You’ve always been a loyal and dedicated worker, and I reckon that after six years you deserve a treat on me.’
They reached the reception desk, and found that Emily’s room was in a completely different part of the hotel to Mark’s.
‘I am sorry,’ the assistant manager assured them, ‘but there is no way we can change room designations now. It won’t be too inconvenient, I trust?’
‘Not at all,’ Mark said jovially. The man raised an eyebrow at him, and Emily got the nasty feeling that he suspected there was more to Mark and Emily’s relationship than business alone! Luckily she was no longer so sensitive about such assumptions, and as they walked towards the elevator, Emily smiled good-humouredly. Maybe she really was more of a woman of the world now than she’d been a few short months ago.
Expecting one of the hotel’s simplest rooms, Emily was amazed by the size of her room – although, she decided, suite would be a better word for it. She whistled in amazement at its comfort and opulence. Her feet sank into the thick, luxurious cream carpet, and the bed that dominated the room was the largest she’d ever seen. There was even an ornate writing table with a bowl of complimentary fruit and bunch of fresh flowers. Surely someone had made a mistake somewhere! There was no way Mark could afford this.
After showering and changing into a blue semi-formal dress that she’d splurged on for the occasion, Emily had her suspicions confirmed when she made her way to Mark’s room, and realised his own was much smaller.
‘Mark, honestly!’ she half scolded him. ‘You could have given me the smaller room. Mine’s a suite!’ Mark raised his eyebrows in surprise.
‘I had no idea. I certainly paid the same amount for each. Consider yourself lucky!’ He grinned at her, clearly giving the idea no more thought, but something preyed on Emily’s mind. Obviously it had nothing to do with Mark, and there was no reason the hotel would upgrade her without reason, so…
‘I think a mistake’s been made,’ she informed the man behind the reception desk. He raised an eyebrow at her. ‘I’ve been given a suite. My employer booked me one of the smaller rooms.’ The man grinned as he typed her details into the computer.
‘It isn’t a mistake, ma’am. You’ve been upgraded. Someone else has paid the extra, but I have no idea who.’ Emily frowned and shrugged, detecting a decidedly wicked twinkle in his eye.
‘Thanks anyway,’ she said, walking away. There was only one person she could think of who’d pull a stunt like that. But how could he be here? Quite easily, she realised with a sinking feeling in her stomach. And if he was, how would she manage to avoid him for the entire weekend? Her heart thudded strangely at the thought of seeing him, and she bit her lip hard. She couldn’t let Mark see how see was feeling.
‘Interesting and twice interesting,’ she muttered to herself as she walked over to the lounge area where Mark waited. She shrugged her shoulders, trying to keep her features carefully neutral. However much she didn’t want to see Nicholas, part of her was both happy and excited by the thought that he was here, and that they were far, far from Ballarat. Mark raised an eyebrow, and Emily pretended to be interested in something on the far side of the room, so he’d be unable to see the blush spreading across her cheeks.
‘I guess it’s your lucky weekend then, Em. Now let’s get out of here, the taxi’s waiting for us.’
The weekend conference was to begin with a dinner at the Rowvale Convention Centre. Somehow she’d pictured a ‘convention centre’ as somewhere fairly, well, conventional, but it was anything but. From the marble laden foyer replete with fountain and fish pond, to the dining hall with its plush carpet, elegant silverware and chandeliers, it was one of the highest classes establishments she’d ever been in. Emily followed Mark to their assigned table, thinking this was a lifestyle she could get to enjoy. It was certainly a far cry from the circumstances in which she’d been raised.
Six other men and women were already seated. Mark was acquainted with a couple of them, which made for a more comfortable beginning to the dinner, allowing Emily to relax slightly, even with the knowledge that Nicholas was no doubt somewhere close by.
The entrée – a delicious looking prawn cocktail – was served in relatively short order, and along with the pleasant conversation around her, Emily found her attention diverted. The elderly gentleman to her left regaled her with humorous stories, and his wife was equally lovely. Between the pair of them and Mark, she felt quite at ease.
At least, for a brief period, before the main course was served and the evening’s host welcomed their first speaker.
Mouth suddenly dry, Emily looked up to see the man of her dreams standing on the podium at the front of the room. Dressed in a black dinner suit, with a crisp white shirt, he was breathtaking, and instantaneously everything and everyone in the room vanished, and all she could see was Nicholas.
‘Welcome everyone!’ he began. ‘I’m honoured and delighted to have been selected to speak to you tonight.’ His words faded off. Emily was aware of nothing but the pounding of her heart and the weakening of her limbs. She couldn’t help but remember their last encounter, and was sure her feelings had to be visible for all the room to see, should they take their eyes off Nicholas and rest them on her, which seemed an unlikely prospect.
Moments passed and Emily forced her gaze down to the plate before her, where she mechanically ate the beautifully presented food, not daring to let her eyes leave her meal, but afterward she wasn’t able to remember a single thing she ate. The only thing she was aware of were the powerful sensations that swept through her as she thought of the man she loved, so close and yet so far away.
But not far enough. There was no doubt that he had something planned for that evening. Why else the luxurious suite with the King sized bed? No! That was not something she could allow herself to contemplate. She’d make sure she returned to her room before Nicholas had time to set foot inside the building, and she’d lock the door, answering to no one.
This determination soothed her somewhat. She could almost believe that she’d be able to resist him. But was that what she really wanted?
The remainder of the evening passed in a blur. She was certain the meal had been delicious – the other guests raved about it, but it may as well have been dry bread and water for all Emily had appreciated it.
‘A penny for your thoughts?’ Mark’s voice startled her out of her agonising reverie, and Emily started slightly, hoping he hadn’t noticed her lapse.
‘It was a lovely meal,’ she said inanely, refusing to quite meet his eyes.
‘And a stirring speaker?’ Mark’s tone was teasing and Emily winced slightly. Could he have guessed? She shook her head slowly.
‘Mark! You told him I’d be here, didn’t you?’ she accused suddenly, able to face him at last.
‘Guilty as charged,’ he admitted with a careless shrug and a grin.
‘Why?’ Her voice was came out almost a wail.
Mark’s expression suddenly turned serious, and he stopped walking and turned to face her directly. ‘I’m not completely stupid, Emily. And you shouldn’t be, either. I’ve seen the way you look at each other. There’s an intensity there…and such suppressed emotion that I can’t help but notice. I’ve rarely seen a man look at a woman the way Nicholas looks at you. Even when there’s antagonism between the pair of you, there’s also something far more powerful. And you know it, Emily. You know it.’
‘You’re right,’ she confessed. ‘But you still shouldn’t have told him. He’s my lecturer and we can’t get involved now.’
Mark nodded slowly. ‘A wise decision. But possible?’
‘Yes!’ she said firmly, nodding her head for emphasis. ‘It has to be. There’s simply no other way.’ And with that she turned and began walking towards the taxi rank, leaving Mark no choice but to follow.
Emily arrived back at the hotel both tired and yet far too alert. Her body was exhausted from the long day, but her mind was buzzing and she knew sleep would be a long time in coming. She instantly regretted the two coffees she’d drunk – but hardly tasted – at the end of her meal. Not only did she need to be refreshed for the next day, but she needed to fall into blissful sleep to escape from the thoughts that consumed her mind.
The luxurious suite she’d marvelled over upon arriving now seemed far, far too large, and somehow empty…and lonely. She entered the bathroom and looked longingly for a moment at the enormous spa bath that dominated the room, before resolutely filling the sink with water and concentrating on the task at hand.
Moments later she was ensconced within the luxurious bed, her eyes closed, and her mind desperately trying to quiet itself. It almost seemed as if she’d succeed in getting to sleep when a knock at the door made her heart leap hard in her chest, and the sharp surge of adrenaline that coursed through her at that instant completed the transformation from almost asleep into wide awake.
She bit hard on her lip and pulled the covers, and then a pillow over her head. She’d pretend to be asleep. Surely he’d go away if she didn’t respond?
But the knock came again, and this time it was harder and more insistent. ‘Go away Nicholas!’ she silently prayed, for there was no one else it could be, not at this hour of the night.
‘Emily!’
She scrunched up her face. I’m asleep, she intoned silently, fast asleep…
‘I know you’re awake!’ Damn!
‘All right…all right,’ she muttered, pulling the covers from her and stepping out of her bed, stumbling her way across the almost dark room to the door. She opened it.
‘Come in, Nicholas.’ The tone of her voice was resigned, and he looked at her searchingly.
‘Could we have some light?’ A half-smile flitted across his face.
‘Of course.’ She flicked on the switch, suddenly all too aware of the brief, almost transparent nightgown she was wearing. Nicholas, too, was obviously aware of it, as his eyes roamed slowly over her body. She instinctively moved her arms to cover herself, but he reached a hand forward and stopped her.
‘Don’t.’
‘Nicholas…’ He put up a finger to her lips.
‘Not another word. You know why I’m here, Emily. This was an opportunity I couldn’t resist. Why bother? Why fight it? We’re far from home.’
‘I know.’ She took a step backwards, away from him. But no matter how distantly she stood, she could feel the heat of his presence like a physical force. ‘But each time we’re together, it’s harder to let you go. I’d forced my mind into accepting that we’d have to wait, so this…’ She shook her head. He knew what she meant.
‘I know. I know.’ He moved towards her again, and cupped her chin in his hand, forcing her to face him, to look into his eyes. ‘It’s no easier for me. You’re like a drug. One so addictive that I can hardly force you out of my thoughts. And when you’re in my mind…as far as my body’s concerned, you may as well be there in person. The weeks haven’t distanced my feelings for you, if anything, they’ve strengthened them. I know what I want, and I know what I need, and right now, more than ever, that’s you.’