Jumper Cable (32 page)

“I will put five horrendous obstacles in your way,” Pluto said. “Defeat them all, and victory is yours.”

“One obstacle,” Jumper said.

“Four.”

“Two.”

“Three.”

Jumper looked around. Dawn and Eve exchanged a glance, and slowly nodded. This seemed to be a fair compromise.

“Those obstacles will be there before we depart here,” Jumper said.

“After they are placed, no Demon will interfere. It will be up to us.”

Both Demons nodded.

“It must be possible for us to succeed,” Jumper said. “If we do it correctly.”

“Agreed,” both Demons said together.

“Agreed,” Jumper said.

Then he and the seven girls were back in the Castle Roogna turret. Demons and men were gone. The paper with the completed Prophecy was in Jumper’s hand.

They were on their own, with three horrendous challenges to navigate. The stakes were divine and awful.

Not only that. It turned out to be morning— the same morning they had climbed to the turret. Their daylong adventure with the Demons seemed to have taken no time at all.

They compared notes. “Did we wend our way to the De mon ess Eris’s lair, and attend a ball, and make a deal?” Jumper inquired, ner vous about the answer.

“We did dew that,” Wenda agreed. “And I met Prince Charming in the wondrous flesh. He is a divine dancer. I wood like to have stayed a bit longer, like maybee forever.”

“And I sat on a rafter with Charon,” Haughty said. “He likes both me and Hottie. Me for intellect, her for making out. He has long been without a female; it seems that poling a raft to Hades turns off most of them. That sort of thing doesn’t bother a harpy. I can have him all to myself, in what ever aspect. He has centuries of thwarted amour eager to be expressed.”

“And I will be with Pluto,” Eve said, “for better or worse, depending on the success of our mission. Either way, he’s quite a man.”

“So it seems it really happened,” Jumper said.

“It really did,” Phanta agreed. “As did our passing tryst.”

The others looked at her. “Yew made it with him?” Wenda asked.

“This is knot flirtatious humor?”

“Not,” Phanta agreed. “He saved me from a small black hole. I was overcome by the moment.”

“So that’s the secret,” Maeve said. “Small black holes.”

“We must be sure to make note of that,” Olive said.

“Noted,” Haughty agreed.

The group looked as if it was making an effort to laugh, but it was unsuccessful.

“Meanwhile, we have three horrendous obstacles to overcome,”

Jumper said. “Or Eve and I will be enslaved by Demons.”

“What of the rest of us?” Olive asked. “I don’t remember us being mentioned in that Demon bet.”

A pause circled around. “I don’t think you were,” Dawn said. “Not in the Demon negotiations. But you’re definitely part of the mission.”

“Surely so,” Olive agreed. “But what is our fate if it succeeds— or fails?”

“My guess is that success will grant you permanent status as you are now,” Eve said. “Full body, absence of stork, better control of imaginary friends, of ghostly form, and of harpy personality.”

“And what of failure?” Phanta asked grimly.

“The loss of those things. Reversion to your prior status. Your men might not appreciate that.”

“But the stork will catch me!” Maeve wailed.

“That’s hardly as bad as what will catch us, ” Eve said. “I want to be Pluto’s wife, not his plaything.”

Jumper could only agree. He now knew enough of Demons to be assured that he needed the protection of half a soul in Sharon. She could be divine, but without that she would be, well, demonic. Then he realized that he suffered from another complication. He had met the Dwarf De mon ess Eris, and danced with her. He hardly knew her, but somehow that limited interaction had given him a foolish crush on her.

But it was Sharon who would claim him.

“So we simply must knot fail,” Wenda said.

With that they heartily agreed.

“What of the Prophecy?” Haughty asked.

Jumper brought out the parchment, and discovered that it now had a continuation. “Go find the Cable, if you are able,” he read. “You’ll find it when, in the Ogre Fen.”

“That almost makes sense,” Dawn said. “We have to repair the broken cable.”

“No it doesn’t,” Eve said. “The cable isn’t in the Ogre-fen-Ogre Fen. It’s between worlds.”

“And what’s this business about when?” Olive asked. “It should be where.”

“That wood knot rhyme,” Wenda pointed out.

“So this d**mn thing is just as confusingly obscure as it has been all along,” Haughty said, disgusted.

“True to form,” Jumper agreed.

“What about the rest of it?” Phanta asked.

Jumper focused on the parchment. “Let no maiden fair, Yield to despair.”

“Who is it talking about?” Maeve demanded. “It’s okay for ugly girls to give up?”

“You are all fair,” Jumper said quickly.

“Oh?” Maeve asked. “Would you like to make out with any of the rest of us?”

“Yes. Any of you could have seduced me, in Phanta’s place, after that black hole scare. You still could, if you really tried. You’re all attractive, and you have all worked to be more so— the princesses especially. That’s why Eve was able to win the interest of Pluto.”

There was half a pause. “Noted,” Haughty said. “So it is talking about us. We must not give up.”

“What else is in the Prophecy?” Dawn asked.

Jumper read the last of it. “It will be nice, If you can splice.”

“Splice the cable,” Haughty said. “Of course that will be nice. That’s our mission. Why is it saying the obvious?”

“Because it is unlikely to be obvious in practice,” Eve said. “We knew this is not going to be easy. It has to be a Challenge whose outcome is uncertain, to be a fair Demon bet.”

“And it surely is that,” Jumper concluded.

They set out forthwith, fetching their bicycles and riding an enchanted path northward, because the Prophecy indicated that their first challenge was far north, at the Ogre-fen-Ogre Fen. The path gradually curved to the right. “It’s veering east,” Eve noted. She stopped, got off her bike, and touched the path with one hand. “Oh— it’s a detour. Complication of weather ahead, so it’s taking a scenic route.”

“Paths can do that?” Jumper asked, surprised.

“Magic paths can. They protect travelers not only by shielding them from hostile creatures, but by routing them compatibly. Don’t be concerned; it will get us there.”

The scenic route brought them to a lovely scene: a great valley with a winsome river winding lazily through it, with pretty foliage along its banks. “The Kiss Mee River,” Eve said. “This should be fun.”

They camped for the night at a shelter by the river. Brown plants grew beside it. Jumper and Dawn picked the pointed fruit of one. It smelled tasty, so they ate it. It was chocolate. They turned to each other and kissed. That surprised Jumper, because he had not had any such thing in mind.

“Well,” Dawn said. “You are growing bolder.”

“I didn’t do that,” he protested. “You did.”

Wenda came up. “Yew both did,” she said. “Those are chocolate kisses. They grow all along the Kiss Mee River, of course.”

Dawn laughed. “That’s one on me! My sister would have recognized their nature instantly.” She glanced sidelong at Jumper. “Shall we have another?”

“Uh, no,” he said quickly, not sure what it might lead to.

“If yew want to make smarter decisions, try that plant,” Wenda suggested, indicating one. “That is sage; it will make yew wise.”

“Thank you, no,” Jumper said, uncertain whether she was teasing him. Unfortunately there was not a lot in this region that wasn’t too sweet

for their tastes, or that didn’t threaten to make them more affectionate than they cared to be. That was the nature of the Kiss Mee valley. It was a region of love, not war.

Wenda dug up a sweet potato. “If we cook this, it will knot actually bee too sweet or friendly,” she said.

“Then we’ll have to make a fire, and find a pan,” Dawn said. But they found neither. “Can one of your friends help?” Jumper asked Olive without much hope.

“Certainly.” A ten-year-old girl appeared beside her. She looked ordinary, but looked around, and became much sweeter. “Hello, Auspice,”

Olive said.

“Hello, Olive,” the girl replied sweetly.

“Auspice is the daughter of Bink and Chameleon, after they were rejuvenated,” Olive explained. “They were eighty-one and seventy-six, respectively, when they

were youthened to

twenty-one and sixteen,

eleven years ago.”

“Sixty years removed!” Jumper exclaimed.

“So they could be young again,” Dawn agreed. “Hello, Auspice.”

“Hello, great niece Dawn,” the girl replied.

“What?” Jumper asked.

Dawn laughed. “Rejuvenation can do odd things. Eve and I are Bink and Chameleon’s great-grandchildren, so Auspice is our great aunt. Her talent is to change her nature involuntarily to match her surroundings in mood, attitude, appearance and abilities. That’s why she became so sweet.”

“That’s nice,” Jumper said. “But how does this help us cook a tuber?”

Auspice clapped her hands with girlish delight. “That’s easy! I brought my cook book.”

“But—”

The girl brought out a thick book she had somehow concealed on her person. She set it on the ground. “Where is your potato?” she asked. Wenda gave it to her. Auspice set it on top of the book. There was a sizzle and the sweet potato softened visibly. It was cooking!

Then Jumper got it: a cook book was a book you cooked on. He had somehow thought it merely contained instructions for cooking.

They cooked several sweet potatoes, and had a nice meal washed down by water from the river. That of course led to a round of kisses. At least they knew it was not illicit passion. Then Auspice faded out, and the party settled down for the night.

Fortunately this time the girls allowed Jumper to sleep alone. They knew that it wasn’t fair to douse him with Kiss Mee water and count it as any kind of seduction.

In the morning they washed up in very friendly fashion, ate some leftover potato, and mounted their bikes again. They moved well, until they reached the huge Gap Chasm. This suddenly balked them, because the path led right up to the brink, and stopped.

“Not to worry,” Dawn said. “My sister and I are long since familiar with this route. There’s an invisible bridge.”

“But Eve—” Jumper protested, remembering her fear of heights.

“You take the high route, I’ll take the low route,” Eve said.

“I don’t understand,” Jumper said. “I could revert to spider form and climb down the wall, with a safety line. But your magic does not relate.”

“We’ll show you,” Dawn said. “Follow me, girls.” She stepped out over the brink.

Jumper leaped to catch her before she plummeted to the depths—

and crashed into an invisible barrier. He wrapped his inefficient human arms about it and hung on. “What?”

“Weren’t you listening?” Dawn chided him gently. “It’s the invisible bridge.” She took another step out into midair, not falling. So it seemed. Jumper hauled himself up onto it, then stepped back toward the brink— and abruptly fell. He barely caught the edge of the cliff in time.

“Oh, a detail I may have forgotten to mention,” Dawn said. “It’s a one-way bridge. You have to keep going the way you start across; you can’t turn back. It doesn’t exist behind you. Only for the next person.”

Jumper scrambled back to land. “Thank you for that clarification.”

“But now you can’t use it,” Eve said. “It no longer exists for you. You’ll have to come with me.”

“Gladly,” Jumper said, disgruntled.

The four remaining girls started across, following Dawn, walking the bicycles, while Haughty spread her wings and flew along beside them. They walked out over the chasm, the breeze playing with their hair and skirts.

“This way,” Eve said, and she too stepped over the brink. This time Jumper did not leap after her. She obviously knew what she was doing. He hoped.

She disappeared into the gulf. Jumper went to the brink and looked down, almost afraid of what he might discover. Eve was walking down the side. Her body was oriented vertical to the wall, horizontal to the ground. It was as though she were walking on level ground, only it was the sheer face of the cliff. Jumper sipped a vial and assumed spider form. Then he stepped cautiously over the brink. It felt like level ground. Now he too was walking down the cliff without falling.

“It’s a special path,” Eve said. “It works for anyone. You just have to know about it.”

Jumper looked around, not having to turn his head. Ahead of him was the distant depth of the chasm. Behind him was the lip of the gulf. He felt level, despite the confused orientation of the rest of the landscape. He glanced at the girls on the invisible bridge. They were making good progress, their skirts flaring as the playful wind continued to tease them. Their legs showed to lesser or greater extent, and sometimes their pan ties flashed.

Jumper looked away. He wasn’t freaking, but he was losing concentration at a time when he thought it best not to. His job at the moment was to get safely down to the bottom of the chasm. But they were nice legs, and nice pan ties.

In due course they reached the foot of the wall. They stepped out onto the roughly level bottom, and the world resumed its normal orientation. That had been an experience!

“Something else,” Eve said. “We have a friend down here.”

“A friend?”

“He’s on his way now.”

Jumper looked. There was a puffing cloud of steam whomping their way. In four and a half moments it manifested as a long, low, six-legged dragon blowing steam with each breath. “A dragon?” he asked, surprised.

“Stanley Steamer,” she said. “Princess Ivy tamed him when she was a little girl, and we have been on good terms ever since.” She lifted her voice. “Stanley! It’s Eve! With a friend, Jumper Spider. Don’t steam him.”

The dragon drew up before them, eyeing Jumper as if not sure whether to take her at her word.

“We’re on a mission,” Eve said. “Can’t linger here long. But it’s nice to see you again, Stanley.”