Jericho (A Redemption Novel) (4 page)

Georgia stared at the letter for a long time, almost afraid to open it. But she took one look at her daughter and mustered up some strength. She had given birth alone, had spent nearly a month in the hospital with a sick baby. She had worked hard to get her own place, her own car, to carve out a life of her own. She had proved to herself long ago that she didn’t need the help of her family.

It was okay to read the letter, she told herself. Because she knew that no matter what it said, she knew she would survive. She ripped open the envelope and unfolded the sheets of stationery that her sister was always so fond of writing on.

Out of it drifted five crisp one-hundred-dollar bills. Georgia stared at the money for a long time. She was shocked by the sight of it.

Where had Carolina gotten that kind of money?

She turned to the letter.

Dear Georgia,

I don’t blame you for not returning my call. If I were you I would never speak to me again. What I did I can’t even forgive myself for. I won’t try to explain my actions away except to tell you that I was scared. I was never strong like you. I could never speak up. But I never once thought he was serious about making you leave. I thought that eventually he would believe you and ask you to come back, but he never did.

I don’t want you to think that your absence has gone unfelt here. The town is not the same without you. The house is not the same. Mama is not the same. She misses you. I can see it in her face. It’s killing her not to know how you are. Father banned her from speaking your name. He had us take your pictures down. She broke after that. She cried for days and hasn’t been the same since. I don’t tell you this to hurt you, but to let you know that even though she didn’t do anything to stop him, she loves and misses you more than you could know.

I wanted to talk to you sooner, sister, but I couldn’t. He barely let me out of his sight after what happened to you. But I’m not under his control anymore. I married Miles Hammond, that young dentist who came to town just before you left. He made me come in for more cleanings than a person should have in a lifetime, but that was the only way he could see me. He’s a good man. He treats me kindly and encourages me to do what I want to do. I wanted to talk to my sister. He hired a man to find you.

We don’t live in Oakdale anymore. We moved to Southington to a big house with plenty of space. He says you can come stay with us for as long as you want. For forever if that’s what I want. I do want that. I want to see you again. I want to see my niece. But I can understand if you don’t want to see me. Just let me know if you are okay or if you need anything. I sent some money. I know how you are. I know you have too much pride to accept it, but please do. Please buy Abby something nice and maybe something for yourself.

I want to hear from you. And if you can, please send me a picture of my niece. I’m going to be a mama in a few months and I want to show my baby its cousin. Please, Georgia, don’t let this letter go unanswered. I’m starting a new life and I don’t want it to be without you in it.

Love you always,

Carolina

Georgia’s head spun for a long time after she put the letter down. Her sister wanted to see her again. She missed Carolina. There was so much she wanted to say, so much in that letter she wanted to respond to, but the thoughts were too big to put into words. Maybe she just wasn’t ready yet—one letter and five hundred dollars wouldn’t magically cure all the pain that lay just beneath the surface. It wouldn’t make her forget the past.

But even though she wasn’t willing to make that big step, she could make a small one. She would keep her sister’s money. For Abby’s sake. Georgia had started a college fund for her the day she got out of the hospital. Some weeks it was hard to put money in there when there were so many other bills to be paid but she did so religiously. Her daughter deserved a good life. Despite the circumstances under which she was born, she still deserved the world.

Before Georgia could change her mind, she pulled one of Abby’s photos out of an album, wrote
I love you
on the back of it and mailed it to her sister.

There would be a day she was ready to see her sister again, but it wouldn’t be soon.

* * *

“Good morning, Lieutenant,” a slender blond-haired nurse greeted him as she walked into his room.

“Morning,” he returned, waiting for the nurse to look at his face. She didn’t. She looked at his hairline, below his neck to his chest, but her eyes never once touched his face or even attempted to. He hadn’t seen how bad his scars were, but every time somebody avoided eye contact with them he felt how disfigured he must be. Still, this woman was a nurse. A professional. She should be able to look at his face.

“I’m going to check your graft,” she said quietly.

She was so unlike Georgia, even unlike some of the other nurses who asked him how he was feeling or at least pretended they cared how he was.

He expected better. He spoke again, setting his eyes on her face. “The doctor said that after the dressing comes off I still won’t be able to stretch my arm for another three to four weeks.”

She nodded, staring at his arm. “That’s right.”

“He also said I might need physical or occupational therapy to regain full strength in my arm.”

Look at me. Look at me!

“It’s possible.” Her hands started to move quickly, but her eyes never strayed away from her task. She wasn’t as gentle as some of the other nurses. Again his mind traveled back to Georgia and her sweet hands and the smile she always managed to produce for him.

He knew what this nurse wanted. To get away from him as quickly as possible. Apparently, Jericho Medical’s motto—We Treat Patients Like Family—didn’t apply to him.

But he wouldn’t accept that. “Can you explain to me exactly what occupational therapy might entail?”

“I can have someone explain it to you later.” She moved her hand to re-cover his wound, but she had moved too fast, causing her hand to slip and slam into the rawest part of his arm. Searing pain shot up his arm and all the way to his neck, causing his body to spasm involuntarily.

“Shit.” He gritted his teeth as waves and waves of pain traveled through his body.

“I’m sorry!” For the first time she looked at his face.

But it was too late for that. She had expected him to act like a beast. Now he would act like one. “Get the fuck out of my room.”

She gasped, but he didn’t care. He had been stuck in this godforsaken hospital for two weeks with no word of how long he was going to be there or if he was ever going to be able to go back to active duty. He was sick of it. Sick of the people not looking at his face. Sick of the shitty food and the drafty room. Sick of being sick.

“Lieutenant Howard, I need to finish.”

He picked up his dinner tray and flung it at the wall. “You are finished. Get out of my room and don’t come back.”

She stared at him, unable to move.

“Now!” he roared, and she scampered out like a scared little rabbit.

He had never yelled at a woman before, but he wouldn’t allow himself to feel guilty about it. If she didn’t want to be around him, he didn’t want her around.

A few moments later, people rushed his room. Three orderlies, two doctors and the nurses’ supervisor. All prepared to subdue him.

Glenda Chestnut took over his care. By her demeanor he could tell she was the head nurse. She had no problem looking him in the face, but her touch lacked any warmth at all. He was mildly surprised that a woman so dour could have such a happy-sounding name.

“Nurse Paul apologizes for hurting you, Lieutenant. I will make sure it does not happen again.”

“I don’t want her back in here. I don’t want anybody who can’t look me in the damn face in here. I got blown to hell for this country and she won’t even look me in the eye. She shouldn’t be working here.”

“I see,” Nurse Chestnut said. “I will handle this immediately.”

“Good. Now all of you get out. I don’t want to be bothered.”

They all stared at him, unmoving.

“Go!”

Once he was alone, Christian placed his uninjured arm over his eyes and went to sleep.

It only seemed like thirty seconds later before someone else was hovering over him. This time he didn’t forget where he was. He knew it was her without even seeing her. He could smell her. Baby powder, sugar and something sensual he couldn’t name.

He opened his eyes to see Georgia standing over him. Her pretty little face twisted into a frown.

“What do you have to say for yourself, mister? You caused one hell of a racket today.”

“Where were you?” he demanded, ignoring her question. She had been gone for three days and he hadn’t realized how much he had come to depend on seeing her until she didn’t show up. She was the only perk of being stuck there.

She raised a brow at him. “Did you miss me?”

“Yes,” he said without thinking. For a moment he wished he could take it back, but she smiled and her cheeks turned pink and his embarrassing honesty suddenly became worth it.

* * *

Christian never ceased to surprise her. Only a few hours ago he’d been throwing around hospital trays and cursing at nurses and now he was telling her he missed her. The little rush of pleasure she got out of his words was undeniable. And truth be told, she’d thought about him, too, while she was off.

Even though she had ordered herself not to, he snuck inside of her head at the most inconvenient times.

Like when she was alone in bed.

“I was off. Do you expect me to work seven days a week?”

“Yes. If I have to be here, so should you.” He sounded like a petulant three-year-old. She wanted to take him in her lap and soothe him. She silently laughed at the image that popped into her mind. Him in her lap. She wouldn’t survive it.

“You, sir, are a very cranky bear tonight. I’m almost tempted not to give you the present I bought for you.” She moved around the foot of the bed and uncovered his feet. They were quite lovely for enormous man feet, smooth with neatly kept toenails, no hair to been seen. She absently stroked the soles of them with the back of her fingers. “You caused a lot of turmoil around here. Half the nurses refuse to come into your room now. But I can’t blame you too much for kicking Alice out of your room. The woman has the personality of a dead fish.”

He looked up at her, surprised, and for a moment she thought her big mouth had once again got her in trouble. But it wasn’t that, she realized. She was touching him. More than touching him. She was stroking his feet, running her fingernails gently up and down his soles. She didn’t want to stop even though she knew she should, so she ignored the questioning look he gave her look and stomped down the feeling that she might be doing something wrong.

His was feet were icy cold and she was just doing her job. She was bringing him comfort.

She stopped stroking only to take one of his feet in her hands to rub it. She had never touched a man’s feet before. She never touched a man in any way that wasn’t medical. But with Christian... He was different from the others. They had families to bring them comfort. To love them and touch them. The only person who came to visit him was his former commanding officer. He needed a little more than just rest.

That explained it, Georgia reassured herself. She was doing a good deed for a good man.

And when Christian closed his eyes and exhaled, she knew what she was doing was more than a good deed. It brought him pleasure. There was so little pleasure to be found in the hospital. To be found in life. And if she could give it to somebody, she didn’t want to stop. She wanted to make this man feel good. She wondered what it would be like to touch her lips to the tips of his toes. She wondered how he would respond if her lips traveled farther than that. To his ankles, up his shins, to those powerful muscled thighs.

A shiver ran through her. Her nipples tightened. A slight throb settled between her legs. It was then that she dropped his foot.

Those thoughts were wrong. No, they weren’t. It had taken her a long time to realize sex wasn’t wrong, that thinking about it, that wanting to have it, wasn’t wrong.

What was wrong was thinking about Christian that way. Yes, he was a man who was beautiful and strong and made her feel unlike any other man had before, but he was a patient and she was a nurse. This had to stop. These strange feelings for him had to stop.

They locked eyes for a heated moment and something she couldn’t name passed between him. Her feelings didn’t disappear like she had wanted them to. Looking into his intensely green eyes somehow made the emotions even stronger.

“My present,” he said gruffly. His eyes settled on her mouth then traveled down her body before returning to her eyes.

“Oh, yes. Socks,” she squeaked, her heart racing as she fumbled in her pocket for his gift. “I know how cold your feet get. This hospital’s air conditioning is colder than the Arctic. These are the good kind. They are insulated.” She quickly put them on his feet and continued to babble nervously. “I had to go to the army/navy store to get them. I checked two other stores before that but they looked at me as if I was crazy when I asked for thermal socks for a man with a size-fourteen foot. I even wasn’t sure they would fit because your feet are so huge, but they do. I bet your mama was glad when you finally stopped growing. I’m not sure where they found you clothes.”

She found herself running her hands over his now-covered feet. This time she wasn’t sure if she was doing it to soothe him or herself. She forced herself to stop, and when she knew merely stopping wouldn’t be enough, she stepped completely away from him.

“Thank you. That feels better.”

Why did he have to look at her that way? As though he could see inside her.

Her cheeks burned. “You’re welcome, Jarhead.” She tried to inject some lightness into her voice. “Now that your feet are warm, there is no reason you should be so cranky.”

“She wouldn’t look at me, Georgia,” he said, and the raw pain in his voice shook her. “I know it’s bad, but I deserve to be looked in the eye.”

He didn’t look so bad. At least not to her, but she knew how he felt. When she’d told her family she was pregnant they wouldn’t look her in the eye. Her father and her brothers had treated her as though she was soiled. They’d made her feel unworthy.