In My Dreams (First Tracks Book 2) (9 page)

When I came out, Jen was stepping into the room with a fast
food bag in her hand.

“I snuck this in!” She grinned, making her look a lot like a
blue-eyed Marcus.

“You’re my hero!” He held out a hand and she tossed him a
hamburger.

“Here.” She tossed one to me too. My stomach growled. I
normally didn’t eat this crap but it smelled like it’d come straight from
heaven. We dug in, laughing like evil conspirators.

“Avery, are you okay?” Jen asked with an intense look at me.
Had I missed some stray mascara?

I gave her a brave smile.

“Yeah, I’m fine now. I just have moments.”

“Yeah, I know that feeling.” She laughed, a bit sadly. “It
hasn’t been easy. We’re on the downhill side now, by a long shot. This is so
much better.”

I had to agree with that.

“Easy for you to say.” Marcus wadded up his wrapper and made
a basket into the trash can. He paused, his hand up in the air, with a curious
look on his face, and it hit me that he hadn’t expected to make it. He was
getting more motor control back. His sister watched it too. He caught sight of
Jen’s expression and shrugged. “I know, sorry. I shouldn’t complain. I just
want up and out of this bed more.”

Marcus and Jen both looked up at something behind me—I was
sitting facing the bed so I had to turn around to see that his parents had come
into the room.

“We wanted to say goodnight,” Elaina said with a smile for
Marcus as she went to the bed to embrace him.

As far as I knew, they hadn’t hung out in the hospital all
evening, so that meant they drove back here to talk to him instead of calling.
Maybe they needed to see him before spending an entire day away from him, but it
still made me feel like they didn’t trust me.

I stepped into the hallway while they said goodbye, and
ended up pacing down the hall and back.

When I turned around and paced back toward his room, both
his parents walked out and spotted me. I hoped Jen would be right behind them.
She worked as a pretty good buffer sometimes. But she wasn’t there this time.

I slowed down but I couldn’t just turn around and run off. They
watched my approach, and I felt like the principal was standing in the open
door of the office, waiting for me.

“Hi Avery,” Elaina greeted, her arms wrapped around her
waist the same way Jen does. I tried to return a real smile for her nervous
one. “Ready for this weekend?” she asked.

A loaded question for sure. She tended to put things delicately
as far as I could tell, and that was her subtle way of asking,
can you
handle taking care of Marcus all weekend?

“Yes, very,” I said, proud of myself for responding in a
sure, firm tone.

“So I’m curious,” Tom said, his eyes boring into me from behind
those glasses. I felt myself falter. “I don’t understand how you met Marcus or
got so involved in his life. You live in Ashland, right? How’d you end up
there?”

He sure didn’t have the same social smoothness Marcus did.

Elaina rested a hand on his arm. “Tom, that’s a lot of
questions, let her talk.”

“Ashland, yes,” I said deer-in-the-headlights blank.

“Did you live in foster care after your parents died?”

“Tom!”

“Would that make me a certain kind of person?” I asked
without even thinking about it first. “Like less of a person somehow?”

His head pulled back—my words actually, literally, knocked
him back.

Elaina tried to say something, and even mouthed several
words.

Jen startled us from the door. “Good for you, Ave!”

She had her arms crossed as she looked between her parents.

“About time you stood up to them. And that’s exactly the
kind of woman Marcus needs too.”

A funny chain of expressions crossed Elaina’s face: shock,
reflection and then
a-ha
. Maybe I just won a few points with her. Tom
stuttered and looked down, and I had to bit into my lip to keep the smug smile
off my face. A silence stretched out.

“We’ll be fine,” I finally said. “Marcus is doing great, and
we’re right here in a hospital.”

For Christ’s sake,
he say.
We’re surrounded by
doctors
.

Elaina nodded and took Tom’s arm again, physically pulling
him in the other direction. “I’m sure you will be. We might see you tomorrow?”
She didn’t wait for an answer.

Tom nodded and straightened his back as he turned and walked
down the hallway, Elaina walking sideways beside him and muttering at him. Jen
walked behind them, and she turned around backwards and made a funny face at
me. We both silently laughed and waved.

Then I raced back into the room.

“Alone at last.” I rubbed my hands together and tried for an
evil grin while adding, “What should we do?”

“Let me think…” Marcus tilted his head, one eye closed and a
hand to his chin in a classic thoughtful look. “Get over here.”

I giggled and hopped up on his bed.

He sat up halfway and wrapped an arm around my waist so he
could pull me against him. Our lips met. I wanted to straddle him but I was
still being careful, so I just cradled his head while kissing him. His hand
slid down my lower back and over my butt, squeezing.  

“Mmm,” he moaned against me. “I love touching you.”

I edged closer, aching inside for him. My hands suddenly had
minds of their own and ran over him, exploring, touching, trying to tease so
he’d want me more too. His hands followed suit, and we were inside each other’s
clothes.

I could hardly handle his touch on my bare skin and gripped
a handful of his shirt as I pressed my face into his neck, gasping. My body
moved against him, overriding any thoughts. I didn’t want to think anyway.

Then he took me by the shoulders.

“I can’t,” he said against my mouth. I heard the words but
they didn’t make sense. Yet at the same time they did. I was just too shocked
to move. I slowly leaned back, trying to read his eyes.

“I’m sorry, it’s just… like this…” He waved a hand down his
body. Did he feel self-conscious? Or worried he couldn’t perform? I didn’t care
about any of that.

“That’s okay. Don’t worry about it,” I said, trying to
control my breathing so he wouldn’t hear just how badly I wanted him. I lay
down with him. “You’ve only had, what a week to recover? We can give it time.”

It wouldn’t kill me to wait…right?

Marcus

I woke up looking down at Avery, her hair flared out around
on her on the snow. Her nose was pink from the cold and her eyes sparkling
under the cloudy sky. I smoothed her hair back from her forehead and laid a
kiss there.

“Hey, Tiger Lily. What are you doing out here?”

She laughed and shook her head back and forth. “I guess I’d
be making a snow angel except…”
you’re on me.

That little thought zinged through me, instantly turning me
on. I suddenly felt her body against mine and her legs wrapped around my hips. Her
normally light blue eyes appeared smoky right now, maybe because mist
surrounded us. Her light golden-orange freckles stood out, spots of color in
her pale face.

You are so uniquely beautiful.

The corners of her mouth curved up for a second before she
bit her bottom lip. I cradled her head in my hands and leaned down to kiss her.
She slid her fingers into my hair and pulled me closer, kissing like she meant
business, her tongue teasing mine.

I closed my eyes and felt the world shift, like swaying,
pulsating like we were… oh, wow…

Avery…

My body tightened and everything exploded, the world going
soft and silent, like when you’re out alone in deep pow.

Then I only heard her breathing….us breathing together. I
followed the noise, sailing away.

***

I thought I’d drifted off again but I floated into some
other dream. Avery’s dream?

I looked with her as she turned her head. Her heartbeat went
crazy when we both spotted Kyle driving his car beside us.

What the fuck?

I jumped down from the curb and raced toward it.

“Marcus!” she called after me.

When I looked back at her, the area around us faded away and
the engine noise died, almost like she was pulling it all back.

“Are you trying to stop me?” I asked. “What’s going on with
that?”

She stepped closer and took my hand. “I went running one
evening, and he stopped to talk to me.”

My temperature rocketed up. I had to let go of her hand and
pace. “What happened? You’re okay, right? You would have told me if something
happened?”

If he scared her or threatened her…

“Nothing did—well, he apologized for being such an ass. So
something kinda big, but not…”

I stopped and stared at her, hands on hips. My breathing was
getting out of hand so I closed my eyes and calmed myself down. What did she
even say? I had to repeat her words in my head and get myself to understand
what she was telling me.

“He was sorry?”

“He’s been having dreams too.” Her expression clouded over
with those words, her gaze dropping. I went back to her and wrapped my arms
around her small shoulders. It always felt so good to pull her close, no matter
how many times I feel her in my embrace, and no matter how many times I feel
her body pressed to mine. I inhaled the scent of her shampoo and ran my hands
over her.

The rest of the story fell into my head, the way things do
when we’re connected like this. I watched the scene happen and went through her
line of thoughts with her.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

She stayed quiet.

“Ave?”

“I don’t know… We were busy and I didn’t want to tell you
over the phone. So I waited, and the right time just didn’t come up.”

I could understand that. I sighed and pulled her in even tighter.
“I got you, okay?”

She nodded against me.

“You know… Does this feel even more real than usual?” she
asked, her face against me. “It’s like you’re actually talking this time
instead of your thoughts in my head.”

“Yeah, you’re right. I wonder what that means.”

“Jazz… She’s been dreaming too, I think. This thing just
keeps growing.”

Her words sank in and we both thought about it. We held each
other so tightly it started to feel like we were one person, one being again
and not two bodies, like before. Endorphins rushed through my brain and body
and I felt myself spinning upward.

Sweet Avery…

***

The tall, bone-skinny doctor scribbled on the clipboard
while the nurse finished with me. They had a small laptop too that they both
typed into for my case, but this doctor liked to write stuff too. He was the
older, not so fun doc that I thankfully saw less. Kathy, the small redheaded
nurse, was usually cheerful and talkative but she kept quiet around this
doctor.

In contrast, I liked that smiley young guy, Dr. Michaels,
and my main physical therapist, Jared. I’d probably end up seeing both of them
sometime today too.

My mind was busy today, thinking about that thing with Kyle.
It bothered Ave that he tapped into this thing and had dreams, but she didn’t
want to feel that way. I didn’t like him sharing in this either. I mean, he
wasn’t sharing anything with us, but it was odd that he had dreams like that
and it changed him so much.

It bothered me that I didn’t know about it for a while too. Ave
and I don’t have to share every little secret. That probably wouldn’t even be
healthy. I just had that expectation because we couldn’t hide anything before.
Well, not very easily. She had buried things about her parents when I was in
her head, but I didn’t hold it against her for hiding something so personal and
painful.

The situation with Kyle wasn’t the only thing bothering me.
I was thinking about it to avoid something else, actually. I needed to keep my
mind off of last night, when I didn’t want to go any farther with Avery.
Whenever it popped up, my face would flush all hot. Was I embarrassed? That
didn’t seem quite right. I don’t get embarrassed easily. Or ever, really.
Ashamed? Was that it? I couldn’t tell. I just knew I didn’t want Avery upset
about it, or thinking I couldn’t deliver, or getting bored with me. But I also
didn’t want to try being with her and things not working.

God damn.

I glanced over, suddenly aware I was reflecting on some
pretty personal things while they were in the room. The doctor wasn’t looking
at me or talking to me much. I couldn’t even remember his name—something like
Eenoway.

For fun I pictured telling him about the dreams Avery and I
have been sharing. That wouldn’t help anything. I know better than to think
we’d find a scientific explanation. Even I would think I was crazy if Avery
hadn’t been experiencing all of it with me.

Speaking of my Tiger Lily…

Avery walked quietly into the room and immediately hid a
fast food bag behind her back. I grinned and she held a finger over her mouth.
She waited patiently until they left.

“What’d’cha get me?” I held out a hand and wiggled my
fingers at it. This was turning into a tradition. And it was okay for now,
right? I deserved a little something to keep me going, yo.

“All kinds of unhealthy crap.” She pulled out a big ol’
hamburger and a large fry. “Nice and greasy and salty.”

We both plucked one up. The hot potato goodness melted in my
mouth. “Oh, my god, thank you, babe.” I had to talk around my food because I
couldn’t stop popping them in. “I can’t believe I’m eating this stuff, but
damn, it’s good.” I stuffed in more fries. “Noice!”

She laughed too and handed me a big cup. “Chocolate
milkshake.” I watched her dip a fry in and tried it too. Yum, salty fry
goodness and cold, rich chocolate.

“Now that is a new kind of heaven.”

I flipped on the TV and found a soccer game. It wasn’t
totally my thing but it was nice to munch and watch something—and not talk
about all that heavy stuff from last night. Maybe we had talked about it enough
in that dream, at least for now.

We ate and then lay in the bed together to watch the game
and talk, lightly running our fingers over each other’s skin.

I was glad Avery couldn’t see my face and the big cheesy
grin I wore. Funny that I’d find something so domestic like this so nice. It got
me thinking about us and all we’d been through. Avery had been through a lot
before meeting me too, and she hadn’t really told me about it.

“Can I ask you something personal?” I said softly, in case
she was asleep.

“Of course.” She twisted her head to look up at me, her eyes
open and trusting.

“About your parents.”

The openness closed down. I had expected that.

“Listen, I know it’s a painful topic. I’m just wondering, is
that something you’re always going to keep locked away? I feel like it’s
hurting you.”

She nestled her face into me more, like she was trying to
hide. “Yeah, well, losing your parents hurts. I don’t think that hurt ever goes
away.”

Silence took over. I wanted to say so many things but the
longer I waited, the more they built up and the more sticky my throat felt.

“Ave.” I finally got just her name out. “I just want to be
there for you.”

She whispered, “I know.” It was so soft it was like a little
sigh. It didn’t look like she was going to open up now either, so I decided to
let it drop.

“I just never knew how to handle it,” she said unexpectedly.
“And life had to go on. I had to move and fit in and figure out life, and I
just stuffed it away. I never figured out how to pull it back out. I mean, what
am I going to do? They’re gone.”

I tried to picture losing my mom or dad. Even when I’m angry
with them, I can’t imagine not having them around. And I’m not really that
angry about this current situation, at least when I put it in perspective like
this.

“But you’re not,” I finally said. “You’re here, and you
deserve to be happy.”

She rolled so she could look up at my face. “I am happy.”

Ave didn’t say those words like a known fact but a new realization.

“Come here,” I said, even though her face was only half a
foot from mine. She slid up the bed, meeting me for a kiss.

A minute later I told her, “Next weekend is going to be
special.”

She raised an eyebrow.

“And you’ll have to wait to find out how.”

I liked the playful smile that spread across her lips. God,
she was hot. My spirits lifted as I thought about what I could do by
then—hopefully do by then. I brushed her hair back and kissed her forehead,
plans coming together in my mind.