I Won't Give Up (13 page)

“You’re about to need a good friend tonight.”
Without any apprehension I punched him in the face, which resulted in a very satisfying crack. Blood came streaming out of his nose. I turned to Fiona who was sitting there with her mouth gaping.

“Time to call it a night.”
I picked her up bridal style and carried her to the car. I was worried I’d upset her.

“You okay?”
I asked soothingly.

“I’m fine.”
She didn’t seem angry
. “
It’s late.
I think we should just get some take out and maybe get a motel room for the night?”
I
brought
my
hand to
her
face and brushed the hair away from
her
eyes
. Now I was confused one. I thought maybe she’d stay at my house again or maybe I’d stay at hers but a hotel never even entered my mind.

“Fiona, what brought this on? For over a month I’ve had to fight tooth and nail to get you to do just about anything and now all the sudden we’re in the middle of nowhere and now you want to stay the night?”
As much as the offer sounded
irresistible
I wanted to make sure that she wanted this, that she felt safe that was the only thing that was important to me.

“I’m just really tired.”
She
said.
I was still confused but I was going to do whatever she wanted. I
drove across town and
parked
at the motel. S
he went to get the room while I went to get our takeout. I ordered her chicken soup and a grilled cheese and buffalo wings. She loved those things
, they became our thing ever since The Barn
. She came into the diner
a couple minutes later looking flushed despite
t
he
drop in temperature. She stood next to me when I noticed her shiver.
I
walked to stand
behind her
, I
wrapped
my arms around her, smelling her hair, it smelled like vanilla
and cinnamon
.
The waitress handed me our order and we walked across the parking lot to the mo
tel room. She unlocked the door.
I turned on the light and was shocked to see there was only one bed. I knew we slept together in my bed but
I figured if she was given an option that she would have chosen a double
.

“There’s only one bed in here.”
I said hoping she’d offer some insight.

“I know.”
She
wink
ed at me
. Afte
r we ate she
went into the bathroom
to shower and get ready for bed.
I stripped down to my boxers and decided to watch some television. I saw her
come into the room out of
the corner of my eye
, she was in just her towel.
I looked over slightly
hoping she wouldn’t notice me peeking
. S
he let the towel drop.
Holy shit!
She’s perfection
, a fucking angel
.

“Oops.”
She said
not making it seem like it was an accident at all
.

“Fiona, what are you doing?” I managed to say somewhat coherently.

She
sexily
walked over to the bed and straddled my lap.
Shit she was so hot.
I rubbed my hands up and down her side just wanting to touch her flawless skin. I was letting her take the lead with this I would do anything she wanted. She lowered her mouth to mine, stroking her tongue on my lips, I opened and our tongues met, caressing. Man, little Cooper was
making his presence known. I was slightly embarrassed. I know she felt it and she started rubbing her stomach against mine making a delicious friction. I used my hand to brush her damp hair off her face.

“You’re the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen Fiona. I mean it.”
I said sincerely.
I
moved her so she was on her back
.
I was going to embarrass myself if she
kept
rubbing on me
like that
. My little fantasies didn’t do her justice.
“I want to explore every inch of you, starting here.”
I lifted her foot and
ran my tongue up the
side. Making sure to do everything slow as possible so she could tell me to stop if she didn’t like anything
and so I could find the spots that were
sensitive
. I savored every inch of her with adoration that she trusted me. I was so in love with her. When she came around my tongue I lifted my head she looked
lustful,
like she wanted to go all the way.

“Um, I wasn’t expecting this… I don’t have anything.”
I
said shyly
hopefully not misreading her
.

“Are you clean?” She asked. I nodded,
yearning
to be inside her
.
I’d never been without a condom and my history wasn’t anything that I would have to be concerned.
“Me too. I’m on the pill.”
It’s really going to happen.

“You’re sure it’s okay? I’m fine with what we just did, that was perfect, more than perfect.”
I’d need a cold shower but I was really fine with that. I didn’t want her doing anything she didn’t want.

“I need you Cooper, I need you to love me.”
T
ears
started
pooling in her eyes
.
She didn’t have to say anymore. I slowly sank into her, trying to maintain control. I never knew it could be like this. She felt so good. I rocked slowly in and out and tried to show her how much I loved her with my body
since I knew she would freak out if I said the words out loud
. I looked in her beautiful blue eyes the whole time, kissing her face, her
amazing
lips, savoring her.
I felt her body tighten and I couldn’t hold out any longer,
I thought about pulling out but just couldn’t bring myself to do it. Frankly even if her pill failed I knew that she was the one I
wanted to spend my life with.
I pulled her into a deep kiss and felt her tighten and let go once more before
I pulled out
already missing the feel of her
and moved her close to my side. She put her head on my chest and I ran my fingers through her hair until she fell asleep. I stayed up and watched her sleep, her little face scrunching up from time to time and she made the cutest little sounds. Fiona was amazing and I was so relieved that she finally gave me the opportunity I
desperately
desired. Finally the day caught up with me and I closed my eyes.

When I woke up she was laying across my chest running her fingers around my tattoos. We made love in the shower; I would never get enough of her. We dressed quickly and headed to the diner for breakfast. Walking hand in hand to the car we started the drive home. 

“I don’t know why you changed your mind but that was the best night of my life.”
I was so happy I’m surprised I didn’t burst
.
She just shrugged her
shoulders,
and smiled sweetly
.
When w
e pulled into
my
driveway I got out
as she was walking to the driver’s side I snuck up behind her
and
picked her
up making
her
giggle.

“You want to come in?”
Please say yes
.
“I can’t.” She said quickly
.

“Are you okay? You haven’t said much on the ride home.
I didn’t hurt you did I?
”
I was starting to get
worried.
Okay I was freaking out!
“Cooper last night was amazing, extraordinary even but I think we both went into it with alternate expectations. Mine was that I was hoping it would help me figure out if I’m ready to let my heart go again and honestly I’m just not right now and I don’t know if and when I will be. I’m really sorry. ”

I felt my heart shatter.
My whole world went black.

“Wh
y Fiona? Last night was perfect. W
hat about this morning? It would be so effortless with us. We’re made for each other why can’t you just see that?”
I
pleaded.

“I just can’t.”
She said making my
heartbreak
even more. “Please just let me go.” She shut the door behind her and pulled out of the driveway. I stood there
watching
her drive away. I was
broken. 

I was going to give her space but e
verything changed after that night.
I thought she just needed a little time but then she avoided me as much as possible
and went
back to avoiding me all together.
As much as I loved her I knew I had to let her hav
e her time to figure things out. She wouldn’t give
in at all. I missed her like crazy and after having that connection with her it was almost hard to breathe without her. I
formulated a plan
that might make her realize that she loved me I just hoped that it didn’t end up back firing on me
.

             
             
             
             
             
CHAPTER FIVE

So Much for My Happy Ending

Fiona

I love you.
I woke with a jolt. I felt like I was being suffocated.

I had gone back to avoiding Cooper all together after our night together it was just too hard. Even looking at him made me feel completely shattered. Part of me wanted to crawl back into his arms where I felt safe
and loved, I wanted to trust him but he was a reformed bad boy. I knew that my heart wouldn’
t be able to take another heart
break and I needed to keep away from him for my sanity.

I was doing a pretty good job of staying sober but last night was particularly bad for me. My parent’s had a huge argument over my dad wanting to force me to move in to his house with him and Gigi.
He blamed my mom for my current
catatonic
state.
Thank god my birthday was only a little more than a month away
, I’d be eighteen so he couldn’t
make me
do jack shit anymore
! The things he said to her were totally uncalled for and nothing like what the dad I knew would say.
I ended up getting super drunk just to avoid running to Cooper for comfort.

It was
Monday in mid-October
when I pulled into
school
.
My head was pounding and I was just in an overall bad mood.
I walked over to Casey and Harper who were talking in hushed whispers.
Ooh, gossip!

“Morning.” I said
glumly
.

“Morning.” They replied.

“What’s going on?”
I knew something was up but they weren’t the type to hold back on the gossip. I wa
s b
etting someone was pregnant but
t
heir faces changed
and I knew it wasn’t good gossip
.

“Um, I don’t know how to tell you this
Fi.
Cooper started dat
ing Riley Wallace. I’m sorry
but you were going to find out somehow anyway.” Casey said.

I felt
like a mirror being broken into a million pieces. I turned and threw my bag back in my car before speeding
back
home
. I couldn’t believe this was actually happening
, I started hyperventilating
. I threw open the front door and ran to my room before breaking into tears.
I sobbed until I felt like I was going to throw up.