Authors: Camilla Beavers
“
Not really,”
I say.
“
Alright.”
We walk into class
together and sit in our seats, giving us time to talk before class
starts.
“
You know what you
need?” Evaughn says after a few seconds of silence.
“
Sleep?”
“
No,” she
shakes her head.
“
Then what?”
I ask.
“
You need,”
she opens her bag and drags out a flier, “a trip to the
carnival!”
She flips open the paper
and holds it in front of my face, sort of like a prize kill or a
trophy of sorts. I can tell that she's proud of herself for coming up
with the idea, especially since it hasn't been well advertised.
“
Sounds great,
Evaughn.” I smile at her and she beams. Her excitement is
contagious and I can't help but look forward to it.
“
So when are we
going?” I ask right before class starts.
“
I was thinking
today after school,” she says, “since it is Friday and
all. Wouldn't have to worry about staying out too late or anything.”
“
Alright,” I
say, “do you want to carpool or just drive separately?”
“
How about we
carpool? I can pick you up after school after I change out of this
horrible uniform. I haven't been able to hang out with you in
forever”
“
Alright,” I
say, “just give me enough time to change and everything should
be fine. Agreed?”
“
Agreed.”
The day goes by quickly,
the anticipation for the carnival building as the time goes by.
During lunch we all sit together. Brock is being his usual talkative
self. At least the conversation is interesting. Or at least keeps me
from feeling like it.
“
Holy crap,”
Brock says mid-sentence.
“
What is it?”
I ask and look around the room, not caring that I don't have my
sunglasses on and ignoring it when my eyes begin to water.
“
Look,” Brock
points behind me, “Sahariel must not be sleeping well either.
He looks like crap.”
I turn around quickly and
my eyes get assaulted with all the colors. He's standing in the
doorway by himself. His shoulders are hunched, as if he's caving in
on himself. His hair is limp and he has dark circles under his eyes.
He looks like he hasn't slept in weeks. He looks like crap. He looks
like me.
As if he can feel my
gaze, Sahariel's eyes reach mine. He looks so tired. I give him a
small smile, but nothing more. He nods slightly, recognizing me, but
makes no move to come over to me. I frown as he turns in place and
leaves. What is he doing?
“
Well, that was
weird,” Brock says.
“
Yeah,” I say
and turn back toward the table.
“
So, anyway,”
Brock breaks the awkward silence.
“
Alright,”
Evaughn says, “school gets out at three, so I will pick you up
at around 3:30 and then we can meet up with Brock at 4?”
“
Sure,” I say
and smile, trying really hard to be upbeat. I want to be happy.
“
Sounds good to
me,” Brock says as the bell rings.
“
Alright, see you
guys then,” I say and gather my things and head to class.
During art class I'm
feeling lonely. I sit in my usual spot, but I don't paint. I don't
even look at my canvas. I'm just sort of preoccupied with the fact
that somehow I wasn't able to feel Sahariel's presence earlier. Maybe
I didn't feel him because I'm so tired. I almost feel like I can't
feel anything.
“
Eden.”
I jump.
Miss Brody is standing
next to me. Where the hell did she come from?
“
Are you feeling
alright? You haven't painted anything new in weeks.”
“
Yeah,” I
smile at her, “I'm fine, just a little tired is all.”
“
Alright,”
she says and walks away.
I can't help it. I just
can't stop thinking about Sahariel. What happened to him this whole
time? That was the first time I had seen him in two weeks. What did
he do about his classes? Did he reschedule or is he just not caring?
I'm completely lost in
thought by the time class ends and I'm surprised when the bell rings.
I collect my things and then head for home, excited about the
carnival.
The drive is quick and
soon I'm in Evaughn's car, wearing a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. The
drive to the carnival is quick.
“
Alright,” I
say, getting out of the car, “do you just want to head in and
maybe grab some food or something to drink?”
“
Definitely. I
think I'm going to scarf down as much cotton candy as my stomach will
allow.”
Evaughn gives me a huge
grin and we walk into the carnival.
Evaughn is on her third
helping of cotton candy when I ask her about Brock.
“
Yeah,” she
licks her lips, “I'm curious too about where the heck that boy
is. I mean, all he said is that he wanted to change too. Didn't think
it would take him this long though.”
“
Hmm,” I
frown and look at my watch. It's been nearly an hour since we've
walked in and still no sign of Brock.
“
Maybe we should
call him?” I suggest, “See where he is?”
“
Good idea.”
I flip open my cell phone
and quickly dial his number.
“
Hello?”
“
Where the heck are
you?”
“
I just pulled up,
stop worrying,” I hear him chuckle slightly.
“
Alright, we will
see you in a few minutes.”
“
Okay.”
I hang up.
“
So he's here?”
Evaughn asks the obvious.
“
Yep,” I say,
“want to meet him at the gate?”
“
Sure.”
We head for the gate and
wait for Brock to show up. It’s crowded so I just try to spot
the spotless white button up that he usually sports both at school
and away.
“
Is that Brock?”
Evaughn says suddenly, pointing into the line of people.
I look to the area that
she points, but I can't see the usual attire, all I see is a familiar
face. There's no white button up shirt, only a fashionable polo and
some jeans on a boy that I never seen in such attire. And no glasses.
“
Holy crap,”
I almost have to lift my sunglasses to do a double take, “Brock...
is that you?”
He saunters over. I
didn't even know he could saunter. But he does. Brock stands in front
of us and smiles. His hair. Did he gel it or something? It looks
different. I don't know, more popular?
“
Took you long
enough to change,” Evaughn says, “Did you have to change
five times or something?”
Brock smiles at her.
“
No, I didn't have
a chance to change after the family portrait. I'd be wearing my
glasses, but you know my mom. She doesn't like imperfect family
photos, and glasses count under that category.”
He looks at me and the
smile shifts. His colors swirl around him in orange, pink and red,
flecked with blue and green. What the heck does the new smile mean?
I'm so tired that my mind doesn't feel like deciphering the colors
that are around him.
Brock says something,
which I don't catch, and we begin to walk in.
Even though the carnival
wasn't advertised well, there are still plenty of people around. And
even though I'm wearing my sunglasses, the colors are very bright.
We stop by a booth that
is handing out free cups of some weird new punch and we stop to
decide what we're going to do. Although both Brock and Evaughn grab a
cup I decide to stay away from the green tinted juice.
“
So, what have you
guys done so far?” Brock sticks his free hand in his pocket.
“
Not much,” I
say, “though I did watch Evaughn manage to eat five things of
cotton candy.”
“
Yeah,” she
agrees, “though I'm not sure if that was the best thing to do
now that I think about it.”
Brock looks at her like
she's a crazy woman, which she is, but then he looks over at me and I
can't see his colors. Evaughn's have gotten unnaturally bright and
murky.
“
Evaughn,” I
look and see black begin to swirl around her head, “the
bathroom is that way.” I point to the right and she makes a run
for safety.
“
Holy crap,”
Brock quickly moves out of her way, “that was close. How did
you know?”
“
You didn't see the
look on her face?” I turn from the way Evaughn ran to look at
him, “Her face was practically green.”
“
Seriously? I was
looking at her the whole time.”
“
No you weren't.”
“
You're right,”
he agrees, finally, and looks like he's going to blush, “I
wasn't.”
We stand there in silence
until finally I see Evaughn emerge from the bathroom, her aura still
dark but lightening.
“
Feeling better?”
I ask and rub her back.
“
Yeah,” she
says, “a little.”
“
So do you guys
want to go on the Ferris wheel?” Brock asks, “It doesn't
move fast or spin, and you can get plenty of fresh air.”
“
That sounds
perfect,” I say and smile, hoping my optimism will affect
Evaughn and help her feel better.
“
That does sound
nice, but I think I'm going to sit down with my head between my knees
for a few minutes. You two go on ahead,” she waves us off,
plops down on a bench and promptly places her head between her knees.
“
Well,” Brock
smiles, “Shall we?”
“
We shall,” I
loop my arm through his and we walk to the Ferris wheel. I turn and
wave to Evaughn, sending good thoughts her way.
The Ferris wheel looms
over us, and surprisingly there is no line. Brock and I step up and
are quickly admitted on. We get a little bucket all to ourselves and
I suddenly feel very awkward toward Brock.
“
So, this is
different,” I say and point out his new look.
“
Yes, well, not
everyone can make the school uniform look cool,” he says while
he folds his arms over his chest and props his feet up.
“
Well those people
are idiots,” I say absentmindedly.
“
All of them?”
Brock asks suddenly and intensely, having un-propped himself and
leans forward expectantly.
“
Uh,” I don't
know what to say, “yeah?”
Brock doesn't say
anything for a while; he just sits there and looks at me while his
aura starts to turn green around the edges.
“
Even Sahariel?”
He questions suddenly.
That was the last thing I
had ever expected to hear from Brock. I am physically taken back by
the force behind the question. Then, suddenly, everything pops into
place.
The green swirling around
him, the odd smile, the extra attention. How could I have been so
blind?
“
Wow,” I say
and look into his eyes, “I never knew. I didn't piece it
together until now.”
“
You,” I
pause, “you like me... don't you?”
“
You're just now
noticing?” Brock looks confused.
“
I must be dense,”
I admit to both Brock and myself. How had I not noticed?
“
I don't know.
Maybe I just wasn't obvious enough,” Brock begins to talk to
himself, “no, that can't be it. Other than following, but I
don't want to seem like him.”
I listen to him mutter,
and that last bit catches my attention.
“
Him?” Who is
he talking about?
“
Your little
stalker boy,” he says, and then clarifies further, “your
living shadow? Well, I should say your ex-living shadow.”