Authors: Camilla Beavers
I see his face for the
entire night. His eyes burn into mine, scorching my soul with their
intensity. Then, even when I wake, I can still see his face, blotting
out everything else that I see, and in the morning, everything
feels... different.
I wake before the alarm
and get ready for school and I don't feel tired. I don't feel spacey;
I feel extremely refreshed. As I take my pill, I figure I must have
gotten over whatever it was that was ailing me.
I manage to make it to
school not too early. I took the slow, leisurely route and I'm even
able to enjoy the morning air.
Brock walks up to me and
smiles a warm smile, “feeling better I take it?”
“
Yup,” I nod,
“no more spacing out for me.”
The morning goes by
peacefully and quickly, and thankfully I am able to remember it all.
Sooner than I know, the lunch bell rings and I'm on my way to the
cafeteria with Brock and Evaughn.
“
Oh, did you hear
about the new student?” Evaughn makes small talk as we walk
through the hallway, “I heard he's from New Zealand or
something.”
“
Want to know what
I heard?” We hear students around us talking about the same
subject. The new kid.
“
What?”
“
I heard that he's
really hot.”
“
Is that all you
think about?”
“
Well, no, but it
is one of the primary things.”
“
You've such a
dirty mind.”
“
Yeah, well not as
bad as you.”
“
Whatever.”
I roll my eyes at the
people passing by. Brock catches my eye and makes gagging motions,
causing me to burst into laughter as we find a seat in the cafeteria.
Brock and Evaughn leave
to get their food, and when they come back I'm heavily engrossed in
people watching.
Everyone's colors are
bright and swirling with excitement. I can tell by the emotions (lust
and excitement) that the new kid is about to enter the room.
Seconds go by and I can
feel and see the anticipation. Colors swirl tighter and faster.
Murmurs start up and I know he is close. Then, he walks into the
room, but no amount of colors or murmurs could have prepared me for
what I see next.
I can see him speaking,
but I don’t hear a word. All I hear is the sound of my heart
beating in my chest as I see the man from my dream walk into the
room. The crowd ebbs and flows around him as if he is the moon and
they are the sea, as if his presence dictates theirs.
I don’t move, I
don’t look away; I want to look away, but I can’t, I’m
stuck. I feel as though he and I are connected on some basic level
and no amount of evolution can change that.
“
Sahariel.”
So quiet I can barely
hear it, his name leaves my lips. I didn’t have to whisper
though. I could have shouted. As soon as his name reaches my own ears
his head turns immediately and his eyes meet mine. Then he begins to
do the worst thing imaginable; he starts to move toward me and I
begin to panic.
“
Eden, are you
okay?” Brock puts his hand on my shoulder, pulling me from my
stupor.
“
Seriously, you
look like you’re about to have a panic attack,” Evaughn
says, extremely astute.
“
No,” I begin
to say, “I don’t- I don’t know. I just… I
feel like I need to get out.” I fidget, my hand over my heart
as I try not to make it obvious as to why I’m nervous. Then
Brock’s eyes follow mine.
“
Is it because of
the new kid?” He asks.
“
No.”
Brock watches me with a
worried expression and Evaughn sits there quietly.
My eyes dart around the
room looking for any possible escape routes, but none of them worked.
I saw it in his eyes that he knew I couldn’t go anywhere,
almost triumphant. My panic was rising with each step he took, and
before I know it he’s right there looking down at me, his sea
slowly ebbing away from the freak like the sea at low tide.
“
Hello,” he
says, holding out his hand, “I’m Sahariel.”
He smiles as if it’s
an inside joke that I already somehow know his name. I don’t
think it’s funny. I frown at him. Pretty soon he’s
frowning back, his hand still extended in a very awkward greeting.
“
Sorry,”
Brock silences the awkward, “Eden is very bad with people,”
he grabs Sahariel’s hand and introduces himself.
“
I’m Brock.”
“
And I’m
Evaughn.” She waves from around her oboe.
“
And this young
lady right here is Eden.” Brock puts his hands on my shoulders
as he says this, trying to be nice. Sahariel then re-extends his hand
out to me.
I don’t extend
mine. Instead I decide to ignore him. I know it must be some sort of
practical joke. Let’s have the hot new guy hit on the
not-so-new-hot-girl-freak. It’s a classic, and I hate it.
Slowly I reach over for
my things and stand up, pawing his hand out of the way and moving
around him. Turning around to face my friends, I put my sunglasses
on. Then I see something that makes me speechless. Okay, it wasn’t
something I see, but the lack of something. Sahariel has no colors.
At all.
Brock reaches over and
snaps my jaw shut. I guess it must have fallen open. No one else in
my life had never not had colors, and yet here is this guy that has
no colors at all. Oh, and I had a dream about him and somehow I know
his name.
I feel like I want to get
to know him, but I’m annoyed with the situation. I don’t
like unwanted attention, and the attention I am getting at the moment
is definitely unwanted and unwarranted, and on top of it I’m
confused; I don’t know what to do.
Sahariel looks at me, his
expression turning from amused to something I can’t read, and
for the first time in my life I curse the colors for not appearing. I
continue to stare at him. I don’t know what to do. I want to
run, but I can’t. I feel like a deer caught in the head lights
on an oncoming car. Then his face shifts to a mix of anxiety and
concern.
“
Have I done
something to offend you, milady?” He asks me.
I’m in disbelief.
Did he just say “milady?” What year are we in? What
century? I do a quick check in my head. Yep, it’s the 21
st
century.
My brow furrows and I
give him my best “weirdo” look and I still say nothing.
Then I do something my friends consider a social faux pas, especially
with a hot guy. I turn and I walk away without a word.
The world has gone quiet
around me. It wasn't because Sahariel was following, but it was
because as soon as I saw him I felt like no matter where on the
planet he is, I will always know where he is. I am so aware of him
that my natural hearing fades and everything else turns into a
shallow murmur. Everything except for the sound of his steps behind
me.
I try to walk away from
him quickly, but he keeps up. Seconds pass, and then minutes. With
each step I take that he's behind me I get more annoyed. I
concentrate on that feeling, because whenever I don't, an odd feeling
of safety and comfort surrounds me.
My fists ball up. I'm
angry and annoyed. Why is he following me? Suddenly I stop. Spinning
around, I decide I'm determined to get some answers.
“
I'm sorry,”
Sahariel says, “I hope I haven't offended you. I was just
trying to be nice. Can I try again?”
“
I-” I begin
to say but he cuts me off, looking extremely uncomfortable doing so.
“
Please? I don't
like making bad first impressions.” He rushes to say, “Please?
Another chance?”
I sigh. He seems sincere.
“
Fine,” I say
and cross my arms, giving him an expectant look.
Then he gives me the most
brilliant smile ever, and as much as I hate to admit it, my stomach
does little flips and my heart feels like if it doesn't shut up then
the whole world will hear it.
“
Hi,” his
eyes glow like liquid gold, “my name's Sahariel.”
I try to remember where I
put my lungs. He begins to look anxious again. I try to smile.
“
Hi,” I say
back, hoping my voice isn't as shaky as I feel, “I'm Eden.”
“
Nice to meet you,
Eden.”
“
Nice to meet you
too”
“
See,” He
relaxes a little, “isn't this better?”
“
I guess so,”
I say, not sure to what he's referring to.
We stand there for a few
minutes in awkward silence. He stands still the whole time, as if
he's used to doing it. I, on the other hand, shift from foot to foot.
I don't like standing still. At least when I don't have to. I look
over at him. Apparently I hadn't been this whole time. He's looking
up and down the hallways, looking for what, I don't know.
“
Okay, now what?”
“
What?” He
finally looks up at me.
“
Well,” I
look around, “we're standing alone in the hallway doing nothing
during the lunch hour. Usually people do things during their lunch
break. And we're not doing anything.”
“
Oh,” he
shrugs, “we could go back to the lunchroom?”
“
No,” I
almost shout a little too quickly, “no, I'd rather just stay
out of there. Evaughn would probably try to kill me if I went back.”
Sahariel's eyes flashed
for a short moment and then the look was gone. The unrecognizable
look crossed his face so quickly I thought it was just part of my
imagination. What could he be thinking?
“
Why?” He
slowly asks.
“
Because I
embarrassed her by walking away from you.”
“
How is that
supposed to embarrass her?”
I sigh. I don't want to
have to explain this to him. It's bad enough he's already popular.
The only thing worse than a popular guy is a popular guy who doesn't
know he is. I look at him.
“
It's your first
day and you're already popular,” I state. I hope I don't have
to explain the whole thing.
“
Okay?”
He stares at me. He
obviously doesn't get it, and I don't know how he doesn't, but he
doesn't.
“
Ugh,” I
throw my hands up and walk away, “never mind.”
And although I don't hear
him walking behind me, following me, somehow I can feel him there. I
feel his presence as if he is an extension of myself; like I know how
my hand is in front of my face in the dark when I have my hand inches
from my nose. I can just feel it even though I can't see it.
I walk to my art class
and feel him follow me in. But feeling his presence doesn't keep me
from hearing the sneers that are quietly whispered around me.
“
Oh my god. Do you
see that? She's totally trying to ignore him.”
“
I wonder what he's
going to do to her.”
“
You think it will
be any good?”
“
Oh it has to be,
just look at him.”
“
And look at her.”
“
Oh yeah, I know.
It's tragic. But this is going to be good.”
“
Has to be.”
I hear the words swirl
around me, the agreements and conspiracy theories bouncing off the
walls like bouncy balls. I'm nervous. They have to be right. Why else
would he be following me around?
Trying to me nonchalant,
I quickly feel my back, part of me expecting to find a rude note of
sorts, and a very small part of me hoping and praying that he likes
me enough that he didn't put one there.
My hand brushes my back
slowly. All I feel is my jacket. Nothing else. I breathe a sigh of
relief. But if it would have been a note I would have known it
sooner. What if he does something else to me?
I don't pay attention to
where I'm walking and suddenly I've walked into my easel, my brushes
and paints flying everywhere. I look up. The whole class is laughing
at me. Sahariel must have put my things in the middle of the way so
I'd trip over them. I look over and glare at Sahariel. He looks back
at me with an innocent expression on my face and the whole class
loves it. The only person who wasn't is Miss Brody. She helps me
clean up.