Fading Darkness (Bloodmarked #1) (28 page)

As I rolled to my side, the plush pillow hit
my face, and I released a long sigh when my head was buried in its softness.
The scent of it flooded my nostrils and was so amazing that I had to take in a
deeper satisfying breath. A sense of wrongness crept through me until I
realized this wasn’t my bed.

It took an unusual amount of effort to open
my eyes and at first, everything was blurry. Once my vision cleared, I rolled
to my back and lifted my head with even more effort and took in the massive bed
that sprawled out all around me. I felt so small in it. It was an elegant four-post
king-sized bed that actually seemed fit for a king.

Just then, I felt like I was being watched
and my alertness kicked in. My head shot in the direction of the source with an
accompanying splitting pain. My eyes found
him
.

Gavin sat to the side of the bed in a big
chair, and he was studying me intently and cautiously, as if he were waiting
for something. My guess was that he was wondering if I was alive or a ghost.
Then, it really hit me, all the events that led me to this very moment.

The old church full of vampires came to
mind, followed by the deaths that led me to that church. I saw each bloodied
and battered face, each turning into the next. Each face that came into focus
was somebody’s brother, sister, son, or daughter. Each face had a life, a
future, before I got them killed with my recklessness. I never once thought of
the consequences of my actions when I set out to find this ghost of a vampire.
I just wanted him dead, and now, all those innocent people’s deaths were on my
hands- everyone from last night, the boy in my bed. I kept making the same
mistake over and over. How could I have been so stupid?

I looked down at my hands, and their blood was
still there, crusted and set in deep under every nail bed and crease. I tried
rubbing it off by rubbing my hands together, but it was still there. I saw the
stains like they have been there for years, and I tried then to wipe them
against the sheets. I felt Gavin’s eyes on me before he spoke.

Through my panic, I could barely string
together his words into a coherent thought. It took me a moment to realize what
he was saying, but I finally heard, “Lucy, what’s wrong? What is it?”

“There’s blood on my hands still. There’s so
much blood. I killed them. It’s my fault,” I said, unsure if I was answering
his question or just voicing my thoughts.

“No. No, there’s no blood, Lucy,” he said. I
felt the mattress sink to my side and knew he was next to me as I kept my eyes
on my hands. There was no way this blood was coming out.

“Lucy, calm down. It’s not your fault.
There’s no blood on your hands,” he said, trying to soothe me. “They did this,
not you. They preyed on your humanity and compassion. You protect people. They
know that.” Nothing he was saying was sinking in, and it sounded more like a
foreign language at the moment.

I saw his hand move over mine. It curled
around both my hands, and I couldn’t move them as I tried vigorously to rub the
stains off. I felt his other hand curl under my chin and force my face toward
his. The look in his eyes was worry. An image of his worried face in a dark
church broke free from my subconscious and tried desperately to unfurl itself,
but I had other faces in my mind.

As all the faces of those victims I couldn’t
save came rushing back to my memory, the light went out of their eyes, and
their cheeks became pale and sunken, drained of blood. Their cold, lifeless
bodies proved too much to deal with, and my body curled in on itself as I went
into fetal position.

The one thing I did notice before slipping
back into unconsciousness was the warmth of Gavin’s body against mine as he
wrapped himself around me, speaking to me in a silky smooth tone that was meant
to soothe my nerves. It was like a lullaby. I wasn’t sure what he was saying
because I was absorbed in my own thoughts and my mind was nearly taken by the
overwhelming guilt that seemed to be making me a bit crazy. At least, that’s
what Gavin’s eyes told me.

With every effort left in me, I blocked out
the images of the dead and focused only on Gavin’s strong body next to me, his
powerful arms wrapped around me, and his careful hands caressing my back in
slow massaging motions. His fingertips drew light figures on the skin of my
back, coaxing me into a more dreamlike state.

I thought the scent on his pillows was
amazing, but it had nothing on the real thing.  I inhaled him, drawing as close
as possible and burying my head into his chest. His body instantaneously
reacted, shifting to better mold itself to mine, and I thought I even heard him
clear his throat. I could barely remember how I could have accused him of
drinking from that girl. Deep down, I knew he was telling the truth. Slowly, my
guilt along with any accusations faded into the darkness, and I slipped into a
very peaceful sleep.

†

Feeling a little groggy, I rolled out of the
now empty bed. I wasn’t sure what time of day it was with the heavy drapes
closed, but the sheets where he had lied were now cold and only held the faint
scent of him. Moving to the window, I pulled back the curtain just enough to
see that it was night, but the sky was lit with big fat snowflakes that bounced
light from the moon off their crystalline surfaces.

I turned and glanced back at the giant bed
with rumpled sheets remembering everything clearly. I looked down at my hands
for reassurance. No blood stains. Yep. I had definitely lost it last night, or
whenever it was.

Shaking off my Lady Macbeth moment, I walked
out into the main living space and saw the green glow of the clock on the oven
range. It read 1:24. I wondered what the chances were that he might have human
food somewhere in this place.

Searching the cabinets, I didn’t have to
wonder long. They were stocked with cereal, bread, chips- all the normal things
one might find in a person’s kitchen. I went to the fridge to inspect further,
and next to the blood bags were items like milk, juice, and Mountain Dew. How
obnoxious. He knew way too much about me. There was even a note on the counter.

Lucille- Make yourself at home, but don’t
go anywhere. Wait for me to return.

“Hmm. Yeah, that’s not likely. Challenge…
accepted,” I said to the note.

After nearly cleaning out his cabinets and
fridge, devouring everything in sight, I, naturally, decided to go out in
search of Gavin. He had to be on to something, and I had a feeling he was out
tracking down another lead at this very moment. I didn’t want to waste any more
time when I could be out getting a little piece of revenge, or was it because I
cared? I didn’t even know what emotions were driving me anymore. It’s not like
I was going out hunting for trouble. I was going out to find him so we could
work together like he wanted.

Stepping onto the balcony, the cold night
air bit at me with razor sharp fangs, but, luckily, Gavin had gone over to my
apartment while I slept and brought back clothes for me, including jeans and a
sweatshirt. Besides my bra and underwear, all my clothes I had been wearing the
night of the attack had been completely torn to shreds and bloodstained. I
thought about yelling at Gavin when I woke up only wearing one of his oversized
t-shirts, but then realized I really didn’t want to bring that up…
ever
.

When I stood in the living room, dressed
appropriately for the weather, I reached for my coat hanging on the rack by the
door as something fell out of the pocket. It hit the hardwood floor lightly,
and sounded like either keys or jewelry. When I bent to pick it up, I discovered
it was the latter. It was a small silver charm bracelet.

That’s weird. I didn’t remember even owning
a piece of jewelry. For a second, I thought I got the wrong coat, that it might
have been one of Gavin’s female companions, but then I caught an inscription on
the tiny charm shaped like a heart.
L.V.M
. My initials. Was this some
sort of gift from Gavin?

It seemed strange receiving gifts at all,
let alone at a random time like this. It’s not even my birthday. Whatever the
reason, it was beautiful and already engraved. I guess it would be wasteful to
not accept. Plus, something about it drew me in. The little angel charms were
hard to resist. Before leaving, I clasped the bracelet around my left wrist and
pulled my coat sleeve down over it.

I stepped out into the blistering cold night
waiting for the chill to hit me, but oddly, it didn’t bother me as much this
time. I was grateful for not freezing to death just from going outside, but a
part of me was terrified by what that might mean.

Shaking the scary thoughts away, I headed
out in the direction of the club. I figured that might be a good place to start
looking for him if he was really searching for more answers. But mostly I was
really counting on his uncanny ability to sense when I disobey him or when I am
in danger. I was sure he would find me if he really wanted me to stay cooped up
in his loft.

I made it about three blocks when I was
yanked into a pass-through between buildings. I was right. He didn’t seem all
too pleased with my being here. So maybe I did know him a little, but it still
wasn’t nearly as much as he knew about me.

The pass-through was only a couple feet wide
and his looming body was racked with tension, which I could feel in the thin
gap between his body and mine. There was an unusual thrill that shot through me
when I took in his ice cold glare. It was that intensity he got when he was mad
at me. It wasn’t like when he was fighting other vampires. That was just plain
scary. But this, this was very, very different. His anger came from an entirely
separate place when it was directed at me.

“Is there any chance that someday you might
actually listen to me,” he growled.

“No,” I started, and before he had a chance
to argue further, I cut him off, “I needed to talk to you. I need to know what
you’ve found out about what’s been going on around here.”

“You should have waited. Do you have any
idea how dangerous it is for you to be out here? You should be resting and
regaining your strength,” he said, his voice on the verge of shouting.

“I rested long enough. Oh, and you’ll have
to do some grocery shopping if you have any of your lady friends over. I sort
of cleaned out your cabinets,” I said.

He gave me a wry look at the
lady friends
comment, knowing that I knew the food was all for me to begin with. It only
lasted a second before his features grew hard again. “Do you have any idea how
many vampires are on to you, not to mention the cops who are looking for you?”

“Wait! What? Cops?” I asked.

“Yes. I suppose you haven’t seen the news
lately. There were witnesses the night you were attacked who gave a pretty
accurate description of a girl who fled the scene of a murder. Not to mention,
the 911 call from a young girl alerting the cops of it. And guess what, they
put two and two together and tied you to the other murders that night. So not
only do the vampires want you dead, but you’re wanted for murder.”

Great. I’ve made enemies with vampires and
humans. Big surprise there. “Well, everyone else is out to get me. Why are you
still hanging around?”

He laughed at that. “What can I say? I enjoy
your company. Your warm, welcoming demeanor just draws me in,” he said slyly as
he leaned closer to emphasize his point.

“Well, your arrogance and your
self-riotousness coupled with your overbearing authoritative, bullying nature
and bipolar tendencies repulse me,” I said stamping my palms against his chest
to shove him back, not feeling the least bit repulsed by the warm hardness
under my palms.

“You know, it’s funny that none of those
characteristics actually surfaced until I met you. So why don’t you go back and
wait for me in the apartment before my bullying nature surfaces,” he said,
grabbing my wrists.

He stopped in his advancement for a moment
as he traced his fingertips under my coat sleeve to where the bracelet rested.
He looked at it and gave a small, almost appreciative smile. There was
something else there behind the smile, but I couldn’t tell what it was.

“Not a chance in hell I’m going back there
to sit and wait,” I snapped.

“How did I know that?” he said drily.

“Because you know everything about me,” I
said sarcastically.

“I know you’re annoyingly stubborn and
dangerously hard headed, but this time you really do need to take it easy. That
last fight took a lot out of you and you’re lucky they didn’t-,” he cut himself
off before giving away something he obviously didn’t want me to know, or didn’t
think I could handle knowing.

“Didn’t what? Kill me? They didn’t,” I
reassured him. “In fact, I feel stronger than ever,” I added, trying to
convince him to let me come with him.

“That’s what worries me,” he said, voicing
my own unspoken fears. The look on his face told me there was something more that
he was leaving out. We were going to have to have a discussion later, but right
now, I just wanted to find out what he knew about the bastard responsible for
all the brutal murders, as well as the drug-induced fatalities. It had to be
the same monster.

Before he could object further, I charged
ahead, sneaking out of his grip while he was in a moment of contemplation,
probably about my inevitable fate as an evil bloodsucker. Even though he was
distracted it was amazing that I could pull anything on him without him being
one step ahead. I got about two feet away before his hand reached out and
grabbed my arm, which stopped me cold. The motion of it jerked me back and I
spun to face him.

“What are we wasting time here for when
there’s a lead out there? Isn’t there?” I asked a little unsure, realizing that
he never actually admitted to tracking a lead.